RIB

Part Three

K pulled out a smaller gun from the locker. In fact, it looked like something that you might expect to get as a prize in a box of Cracker Jacks, it was so small. J looked at it and laughed. "That looks like the dinky gun you gave me when I first joined"

"Well, It's obvious that Agent A doesn't need a big powerful gun with his built in ray cannon." K said. "But he could use a non-lethal weapon to stun someone."

"You kidding?" J laughed. "What good is that little pop gun?"

K turned to J with a stern look in his face. "You still want to learn things the hard way don't you?" He adjusted a setting on the gun, pointed it at J and fired.

"NO, you ain't going to shoot me with that …..." The weapon emitted a purple aura which enveloped J. He froze in his tracks, turned as stiff as a board and as green as the statue of liberty, and then fell to the floor with a thud.

"Don't worry about him." K said to A. "He'll wake up in about two minutes and not remember a thing. Might have a bit of a headache though..."

Exactly two minutes later J's color reverted from that of oxidized copper to his normal light brown. He started to flinch, and then got to his feet. "What the fuck happened?" he asked, rubbing his head.

"OK, enough of that demonstration." K said, handing the little gun to A.

K led Astro back to the chief's office, J followed slowly behind, he was still groggy from the effects of the stun gun.
"Well I see you got Agent A a nice fit on his new suit!" C said. "OK, let me brief you Agent A" he said.

Astro stood at attention and listened.

"One of the best and worst kept secrets of the last hundred years or so is the fact that our planet is being visited by Aliens from space." C started. "They seem to really like New York, and a great many of them have settled here. In fact NY City's space Alien population has gotten so large that the government needed a special agency to keep track of them. We've kept their existence a secret from the general population, the country isn't ready to accept the facts. Most of these extraterritorial immigrants are good citizens, but we do have some problems with the undesirables that have turned to violent crimes. That's where the MIB agency comes in. We had been managing to keep a lid on things, our new residents disguise themselves well enough so that they fit right in with the rest of the City's weirdos. Half the population of Greenwich Village are now space aliens, did you know that?"

"Actually, where I come from we know all about space aliens. Our government hasn't been keeping it a secret. I have had to fight quite a few aliens in the past few years." Astro said.

"Yes, I know all about what's been going on in Japan." C said. "Seems all the really dangerous aliens seeking to take over the planet manage to land in Japan. Lucky for humanity you've been on the job."

Astro's face turned red and he shrugged his shoulders, in embarrassment.

"Did the interrogation team get anything out of our assassin?" K asked.

"Not much. He admitted to being an enforcer in the Vogan Mafia, but we
already figured as much." C answered. "He clammed up after that."

"Let me have a crack at him." J said. "I'll get him to talk."

"Good luck with that." C said.

The assassin that Astro had tackled was strapped into a chair in the interrogation room. K, J, and A entered the room. The alien had three eyes, two noses, and a mouth that opened sideways, like an insect's. His hairy skin had a purplish hue to it, and he smelled like kangaroo vomit. He wore dark glasses over his eyes.

"Light bother you?" J asked as he turned up the lights in the room. Their guest squirmed. K grabbed the dark glasses off his face and the assassin squinted hard to protect his eyes from the room lights.

"He really doesn't like the light, does he?" J asked.

"You stinking MIB dogs!" the alien gargled in a low pitched voice. "I hope you get what's coming to you!"

"Tell us why you offed Omnicron." J demanded. "Or I'll make you really uncomfortable."

"Go fuck yourself!" the alien replied, barfing on the table.

"Hey, do we have any brighter lights in this room?" J yelled toward the door.

"Maybe this will do." A replied.

Astro aimed his search light eyes at the assassin and turned them up full blast. The room was now illuminated like the top of the Empire State Building.

"AHHHGGG turn that down!" their guest screamed.

"Then spill your guts." J said "though not literally!"

"Omnicron was playing both sides of the street!" their captive said. "He was a double agent. He fed you information that served his needs, and those of his employer."

"Who was he working for?" K demanded.

"An enemy of the Vogon's. He was working for the 'Brox."

"What the hell is the 'Brox?" J asked.

"The 'Brox isn't a what, it's a who!"

"Does it have a name?"

"The 'Brox used to be the president of the Galaxy, till he was impeached for being a thief. The guy's from the Betelgeuse system. You mean you never heard of him?"

"We've never been out that way." K told him. "The name please?"

"He'll kill me if he finds out I squealed."

Astro turned up his eye lights even brighter.

"OK OK! It's Zaphod Beeblebrox!"

Astro switched off his searchlights.

They left the room, leaving their guest still tied up in his chair, sweating.

Astro handed K a piece of paper.
"I've translated the contents of that microchip for you."

K read the report slowly.
"Seems the Vogans intended to smuggle some dangerous critters down to Earth. Looks like the 'Brox and the Vogan's are about to start a crime war here in NYC. If we don't stop them we might have a swarm of Ravenous Bugblatter Beasts from the planet Traal on the loose.

"I hate bugs!" J moaned.