Jedediah POV

Chapter 19: The worst weeks

I didn't look back and just kept on walking. Octavius wouldn't follow me into the Wild West, I knew that. So I walked away, so he wouldn't be able to see I lied. I've always been a bad liar.

Those last two weeks were the worst weeks I've ever been through since I'm here in this museum. For two weeks I haven't seen any Roman and the giants didn't bother me even once, but it still was bad.

It started when I was brought back to the Wild West in the night when we were thrown outside. Cecil told my boys his story, the one when I had left Octavius behind in the snow to let him die. Most of my boys just struggled and didn't really bother much. But some of them showed they agreed with me and were proud to call me their leader, like William.

"It's a shame he is still alive," he once said to me while smiling. I couldn't even find the strength to node at him.

But there is one person who just doesn't seem to understand why I left the Roman: Jacob. The same night he came to me.

"Is everything alright?" Jacob asked me and looked worried at me.

"I'm fine," I lied. He brought me a blanket, but left me alone after it.

The next night he came to me again. "Jedediah?" he asked worried again. "Something is bothering me." I just looked at him, a signal for him to continue. "I don't understand, Jedediah," he told me honestly. "I just don't understand."

"What do you not understand?" I asked thinking about something else.

"Why did you abandon the Roman?" Jacob asked and immediately he had my attention. "I ask, because it doesn't seem something you should do. So why? What did that Roman ever do to you?"

"Why are you asking me this?" I asked and tried to sound normal.

"Because you act different than before," Jacob said softly. "You always told us to respect the Indians. You made sure we treat them well. And now you just abandon a Roman to die in the snow."

"That isn't the whole story," I answered and really tried hard to stay calm.

"Then what is…," Jacob tried to say, but I shouted through it before he could finish his sentence.

"Enough Jacob!" Suddenly the boy looked kinda scared at me. "You have no idea what you are talking about," I said after it, but a lot calmer now.

"That's why I'm here. To learn what happened between the two of you," he answered with a shivering voice. "But I understand. I'm sorry. Really… Sorry…" After that he turned around and walked away.

I was so angry at myself. But I can't lie to him, I refuse to do so. But I also can't tell him the truth. How can I explain that we are allies for 13 years now? I can't involve him in that. It's not that I don't trust him, but I want to protect him for the problems I carry with me. But still, I'm sick of the lies. And definitely sick of lying to Jacob. He always thinks it's his fault, but he does nothing wrong. I try to avoid him as much as I can. It gets still harder to force myself to look ordinary when I see one of my old friends.

And today I had to lie again, but now to Octavius. I can't tell him I started to consider him as my friend. I mean, we're still in war with each other. It would only make it even more difficult. But the worst part about everything is that I know everything could be different. I know for sure that Octavius and I could be very good friends if we were just born in the same time and place. We would ride on our horses side by side through the Wild West. We wouldn't fight against each other, but only with each other against another enemy. We could've been the greatest partners in history. And maybe, if I hadn't walk away on that moment when I had so much to say, we were able to be friends here. If I had told him I tried everything just to save his life, then we could have been friends. We could've been the greatest partners in the museum, together fighting against the giants. Instead of that I turned my back on him and walked away and I'll never know what we could've been.

After I had walked away from Octavius I knew I couldn't bare this any longer. It felt like I had to carry all the misery in the world and I had to take away some weight quickly, before I would break down beneath it. I could see Jacob from a distance and walked straight to him. We hadn't spoke for each other the last two weeks, so Jacob didn't say a word when I stood beside him. I'm sure he was scared I would send him away again.

"I lied to you, Jacob," I confessed, not sure how to start. Jacob looked amazed at me. "I didn't abandon the Roman in the snow," I continued without looking at Jacob. "Honestly I did everything just to keep him alive. And I felt relieved… even happy, when I heard he made it." Slowly I turned my head towards Jacob, just to see a smile on his face.

"I'm happy to hear that," he said, while his smile made it clear he was glad. "That's just how you always have been. But the other men wouldn't be so glad to hear it."

"I know, Jacob," I said calmer then I've been the last few days. "And that's why it is so important to keep this quiet."

"And the Roman, what was his name again?" Jacob asked.

"Octavius?" I said quiet surprised Jacob asked about him. "He is the last person who should know what truly happened. And don't call his name, it only brings distress with it."

And chapter 19 is done! :D I'm sorry if this chapter is kinda confusing or boring. I know it's not the best chapter, but I think this chapter is still kinda important.

And another thing: The next two week there will not be a new chapter from 'Just call my name', because of the holidays (:D). So chapter 20 will be there over 3 weeks, just saying. Happy Holidays! ;)