"Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned."

- Buddha -

Glee club came a lot faster that day than it normally did. Marley imagined it was probably weird for the other kids to see Jake, Ryder and herself sitting as far away from each other as possible. Although over the past few weeks they had gotten used to the idea of Ryder and Jake not being friends anymore. Marley even heard Tina mention that she saw that coming from a mile away.

"Hey Mr. Schue?" Jake asked once the man walked through the door. Without even thinking about it, Mr. Schuester nodded his head at Jake for him to ask whatever it was he wanted to ask. Marley fought with every ounce of energy she had to keep her eyes forward and off of Jake. "Can I sing something? It's kind of important."

Although he seemed reluctant because of the approaching Regionals competition, he nodded his head and Jake took his spot in the center of the room. Quickly, he motioned for one of the old seniors to stand next to him. Marley recognized the other boy immediately as Mike Chang, or as some other select people prefer to call him, the other Asian.

"You were my sun. You were my Earth. But you didn't know all the ways I loved you, no."

Jake started, swaying back and forth to the slow beat.

"So you took a chance and made other plans.

But I bet you didn't think they would come crashing down, no."

There was a loud, obnoxious scoff heard and Marley turned to see Ryder rolling his eyes while shaking his head. Sam, another boy who Marley knew was friends with both boys, turned to look at him with a questioning look. Jake didn't seem to be bothered by any of the other members of Glee club. His eyes seemed to be fixated on Marley.

The beat of the song changed slightly and Jake and Mike started dancing.

"You don't have to say what you did. I already know.

I found out from him. Now there's just no chance for you and me.

There'll never be and don't it make you sad about it?"

Marley seemed to grasp the concept of the song and suddenly her blood was boiling. How dare he pretend like everything was her fault; like everything was always her fault? He was in the wrong too, wasn't he? That's what Ryder seemed to think. As the other boy flashed into her memory, she turned to see him staring back at her. In fact, everyone was staring right back at her. Did everyone know the song was about her?

Of course they did. Although it killed his reputation a little bit, Jake made sure everyone knew which left both Marley and Ryder a little ostracized from the rest of the club. After all, cheaters suck, right? It doesn't matter what Jake ever did to her. What mattered was the fact that after everything, Marley cheated.

"You told me you loved me

So why did you leave me, all alone?

Now you tell me you need me when you call me on the phone.

Marls, I refuse, you must have me confused

With some other guy.

Your bridges were burned, and now it's your turn

To cry, cry my a river.

Cry me a Ri-"

The song was interrupted, luckily, by a very upset Ryder. Although she didn't appreciate Ryder sticking up for her at this exact moment, she was relieved to hear Jake stop singing.

"I'm sorry but this is bullshit!" Ryder muttered, shaking his head at the boy who had just finished dancing in front of him. Marley turned towards Mr. Schuester, who seemed intrigued yet worried, at the situation in front of him. Finn, who was sitting idly playing with his clip-on tie, turned towards the boy, confused by his outburst.

The only three in the room who weren't confused were Ryder, Marley and Jake. Marley prayed it'd stay that way.

Marley turned just in time to see Jake bite his lip and turn helplessly toward Mr. Schuester. "Sorry, I just needed to express my feelings and through song is the only way I know how."

Marley narrowed her eyes at the boy's failed attempt to come off as shy. Clearly, nobody believed him. It wasn't in Jake's nature to be upset; it wasn't in his nature to be affected by other people's words. Mr. Schuester, however, didn't see it that way as he turned angrily back towards Ryder. "I think you need to take a walk."

Ryder chuckled dryly as he turned to face Marley. Suddenly, his eyes flashed and she sensed he was about to do something she knew she would regret, but before she could stop him, he was saying, "You've got to be fucking shitting me! He hit her!"

Marley's eyes shut painfully as she was sure everyone turned to look at her. She could hear people gasping and the sound of a chair, she presumed belonged to either Mr. Schuester or Finn, being pushed as whoever the occupant was stood. As she opened her eyes, she saw Finn standing over her with a look of concern.

"Marley, is that true?"

Glancing to her left, where everyone was sitting, she suddenly was reminded of the time in the choir room back after she fainted. Sure, they may have been concerned but on top of that, was a feeling of judgment. They were judging her. She was weak to them. She was less than them. But she wouldn't let that happen again. She couldn't.

With one last sad glance towards Ryder, she shook her head and muttered, "No. I have no idea what he's talking about."

She could see Jake standing behind Finn with a look of pride on his face. Suddenly the tables turned and nobody was staring at her anymore. They were staring at Ryder. His mouth was somewhat open, probably because he had thought she'd stick up for him; for herself. But she didn't and although she knew she would have, she was relieved when she realized nobody was judging her. They were judging Ryder.

It was her fault but at that moment, she was content; content with being the wallflower she loved being. And for once, she didn't care what Ryder was feeling, even though it made her sick to admit that. At least their negative attention wasn't on her.

"I'm sorry but I'm going to have to ask you to leave." Mr. Schuester said, in regards to this new revelation that Ryder was lying. "Interrupting is one thing, but accusing someone of something that serious is intolerable."

Ryder's mouth hung open slightly, as he turned to his fellow Glee club members for support. Even Sam, one of Ryder's best friends, shook his head in disappointment. Sighing, Ryder stood up and awkwardly walked towards the door, stopping just in front of Finn.

Marley's heart broke when she heard Finn mutter, "Sorry dude but you don't do that."

She didn't take pride in seeing Ryder in pain. It didn't make her happy or amused in any sense. It made her feel like crap. Why was she being the girl that hurt everyone around her? She hurt her mom and her friends when she forced herself to throw up. She hurt Jake when she let Ryder kiss her. She hurt Ryder just now.

Why couldn't she just be nice to those around her and make them feel good? She figured she'd be wondering that for the rest of her life, however long that may be.

She was selfish, sure, and she was upset. But she knew deep down that she had no right to be. After all, it was Ryder who got burned.

X X X

So there you have another chapter. I'm sorry for the delay. If you read 'Carry On' you'll know that I'm going to try to keep these stories to a ten day schedule until I can manage to update weekly.

So until then, I hope you guys have been doing well and I hope you review.

Song: Cry Me A River by Justin Timberlake

Thanks for all the support and I hope you're weekends are going fantastically.

Love, Kaylie