-Chapter Twenty Six-
When they arrived at Daeghun's house, Bishop and Daeghun were skinning a large buck they had lashed head down between two large trees.
Bishop looked up from his task with a grunt as they approached, returning to his task without further comment. Daeghun straightened up and gave Lana and Casavir an appraising look.
"So my daughter, have you completed your task?" Daeghun asked.
Lana met his look coolly, "Yes father, I have. Now I can leave this village and never return. It is no longer my home, not that it ever was. Isn't that what you wanted all along?"
Daeghun nodded solemnly. "It was time you discovered that on your own. I am sorry if this has brought you grief, it was not my intention."
Lana's jaw clenched but she remained silent.
"You friend Bishop has brought us dinner. I thought I would help dress his kill with him. Shandra is quite the story teller, but… Bishop seemed to need the help."
Bishop snorted, "That's the politest way I've heard it put. Shandra bored your father to tears. He couldn't run out of there fast enough."
Casavir could swear he noticed color rise in Daeghun's cheeks as he hastily turned again to the deer.
Later that evening they all sat before the fire. Sand and Daeghun puffed contentedly on pipes filled with a pleasant smelling blend of Daeghun's creation.
"I didn't know you liked that Sand," Shandra commented.
"I didn't know I did either. I could learn to enjoy this immensely," Sand drawled contentedly.
Bishop lay sprawled before the fire on his back upon an old bear skin rug, his fingers laced behind his head and staring into the dancing flames. "I could put up with this. It's been a long time since I had decent company with another competent ranger."
Lana sat curled against Casavir on a large overstuffed chair, staring wistfully into the fire. "Father, I think it is time you told me of my mother. Please, I need to know."
Daeghun sighed, "Yes daughter, it is time. I have put this day off long enough. It is your right to know. When she was little older than you, adventure sought her out as well. We met in a tavern and were drawn together by mutual necessity."
He sat further back in his chair and his eyes focused far away. "There were several of us and tales were told. But with all such tales, some did not end well. One day we both realized that of the original band - only we were left. I had had enough of death, especially of those close to me."
Lana sat forward listening intently, "Did my mother give up adventuring as well?"
Daeghun shook his, a sad smile flickering across his mouth. "No, she continued her travels. You mother was made of a different ilk then I. My Shayla and I settled in West Harbor and your mother would visit us occasionally. A heart can heal over time - I had become content. One day when Esmerelle returned she was thick with child - you."
He paused for a few minutes, his thoughts distant. "Esmerelle stayed with us through your birth and infancy. We were happy to share that time with her as we had not been blessed with our own children. You were born and… those were good times. She made no mention of your father and it was not our place to ask. Then, I lost everything again."
"Father, I was still here. Was I nothing to you?" Lana whispered painfully.
"Lana, I lost my love, all my dearest friends had been taken from me one by one as I watched. The thought of losing one more I loved was too much. You were the daughter I never had but my heart… I could not risk the loss again and kept you out. For this I am sorry but I thought it for the best. You were meant for more then this place, this is not your home and I knew that always. It is time you know also."
"But there was no room to care for me? Was I such a burden?"
"No my daughter, you were never a burden but you needed to be strong. You had to leave. There is no place for you here."
"I see. I am sorry father, you are right. There is no room for emotion; it only gets in the way," Lana said with pain lacing each word. She stood slowly and with shoulders slumped, padded softly to her room.
The others sat quietly absorbing what had been said. Daeghun sat staring mutely into the fire. After several minutes, he stood and walked outside without a word. Casavir could see him through the window staring into the night.
Casavir excused himself to follow Daeghun outside. He silently approached Daeghun and stood by the older man's side.
"You have done well with Lana sir," Casavir said after a few moments.
"I have done what I thought best. Others would disagree with you, including my daughter."
"She is strong, she will see in time what was required."
"No Casavir. I have done her a great disservice. I shut her out; she does not know how to allow herself feelings. Lana believes herself unworthy because of me. I knew love; my Shayla was all I ever wanted. When I lost her, there was no room for anyone else. Lana paid that price."
Casavir stood quietly, each man lost in their private thoughts.
"You have raised a good woman Daeghun. I promise to stay by her side always," Casavir said quietly.
"Yes, she is a good woman. Maybe you can help her see what she cannot. She deserves someone that will love her as I loved my Shayla. Take care of her Casavir," Daeghun replied with sadness in his voice.
Casavir nodded, keeping his silence. After several more moments in silence, Casavir returned to the house and curled into bed around Lana's still form. He stroked her arm lovingly before wrapping his arms around her and pulling her close. She snuggled closer but kept mute as they fell asleep.
Morning came and everyone prepared to leave quickly. All were ready and anxious to return to Neverwinter.
They stood outside Daeghun's house as Lana and her father said stiff and awkward goodbyes.
"Father, I leave West Harbor and hope to never return. This is not my home, you were right. I never belonged here. I'm not sure I belong anywhere."
"My daughter, it is best you not return. This was never meant to be your home, but be assured you will find where you belong. You have strength in you; you must find it." Daeghun stepped forward and embraced Lana awkwardly. She stood unmoving for several seconds but finally returned his embrace.
"I know you only did what you thought right, but it will take time for me to understand and accept. I hope we will meet again, but if not…"
"Be assured we will Lana. Until then, may the wind be at your back and keep you safe." Daeghun nodded and Casavir thought a glimmer of a smile crossed the elf's lips.
"You have good company, serve them well and watch over each other," Daeghun said speaking to Lana but his eyes lingered on Casavir. Casavir nodded in unspoken acknowledgement.
They had traveled for days. The traveler's were tired, but spirits improved the closer to home they came. Everyone's attitude except Lana's, she had withdrawn further into herself and spoke very little to anyone. She kept Casavir and the rest of the party at arm's length but no one seemed to notice; they were too happy to get back to Neverwinter.
Casavir grew increasingly concerned but the road was no place for heartfelt, private discussions when you traveled constantly in a group. He bided his time and ensured he did all he could to be near her when possible. Casavir was becoming more frustrated as each silent night passed by her side as she continued to shut him out.
A few days away from Neverwinter, the party decided to stop early for the day. Rations were growing low and they all desired fresh meat. Bishop went alone to hunt, leaving the rest to set up camp, repair equipment or rest. Casavir had taken the opportunity to relax after his share of the evening chores was completed. He sat with his armor lying beside him on the ground, wearing nothing more then a light cotton tunic and linen breeches while polishing his sword. Lana sat on her bedroll at his feet, oiling her leathers donning a soft cotton tunic, slubbed flax trousers and bare feet.
She reached for her discarded leather boots, jamming her feet in and brusquely tucking her pant legs inside her boots, and tucking Bishop's sheathed hunting knife into her boot. Lana said nothing as she snatched up her woolen cloak tossing it around her shoulders and heading toward the woods.
"My lady, where are you going?" Casavir inquired after her.
"I thought I heard a stream nearby. I was hoping to find it, and possibly bathe or at least refresh our water supplies. I will not be gone long Casavir."
He stood from the fallen log he sat upon, setting his blade gently aside. "Allow me to accompany you. You know you shouldn't go alone, especially if you plan to go without your blades or bow."
She nodded turning on her heel to climb through the brush.
Now we can speak in private. This cannot continue; her silence will strangle her. I have to talk to her, tell her what I feel whether she believes me or not.
Lana had climbed several yards ahead of him, but he could still see her through the trees. Casavir watched her navigate silently through the underbrush; her cautious step reminded him of a long legged doe ever cautious for unseen predators.
She has to listen to me. I have never seen anyone so locked in their silence. She is so like a deer, always on guard hiding in shadow and ready to run if anyone ventures too close. No one should have to live their life feeling so alone; can't she see I desire to be with her?
He watched her disappear down the other side of an embankment but caught up moments later. Lana knelt beside a happily bubbling stream that emptied into a small pool of clear blue water, her cloak pooling around her feet. She cupped some water to her lips with one hand, her other bracing her with fingers splayed in the moist dirt underfoot. The image of a doe came again as he watched her long limbs crouched to sip from the cool running water. The scene before him was serene and peaceful, just the two of them alone and hidden from the world.
He approached her, standing beside her as she knelt.
"My lady, I have wished to speak to you alone for sometime and it appears this is as good a time as any." Lana slowly stood, staring at him anxiously but held her ground.
So like a doe, ready to bolt at any sign of threat.
"I thought we should speak of what happened before we left and now what has occurred at West Harbor. You are carrying much hurt, I only wish to help."
"Casavir, there is nothing more to say. It has all been said. I have no home, nothing is left for me. I have to finish the task of whatever the shard holds and that is all."
"No Lana, there is more. There are your friends; they want to be with you but you will not allow it. That is your homeif you would see it." Lana said nothing, her expression hard and disbelieving.
"Whatever has happened in the past is gone now. We want to help you, I want to help you. You have to quit pushing me away Lana. I am here for you; I have sworn myself to you if you would only see it."
"We are both sworn lackeys in the service of Neverwinter aren't we Casavir? You are sworn to me to save your liberty and I am sworn to service so I have none. I have sworn my liberty away, now all I have is duty until the day I die."
"Am I not more to you than a simple lackey?" Casavir flared.
Lana retorted, "It is your duty to serve is not?"
I am loyal to you out of my CHOICE! I am loyal to you because I WANT to be!"
"I did not ask for loyalty did I? I never asked for loyalty or duty, I just wanted to be left alone, get married and be normal."
"Then what do you ask of me? Do you want a bed partner only? You have Bishop for that. I have still given you EVERYTHING! Everything I could!"
"It is not enough. You never gave yourself, only duty or honor. That is not my dream, to have someone serve me."
"What are you talking about? I gave you everything! I gave you my sword, my heart!"
"Your heart? You gave me your sword and your duty like a good paladin should. I have sworn myself to you and yet you still do not believe me to be true to you. You insist upon throwing Bishop in my face at every turn! Every twist of the road you do not like, you question my devotion."
"It is you who questions mine, Lana! Yes, you are close with Bishop, I recognize this. I tolerate it, but I do not encourage it. That man is dangerous. And when I tell you I care for you, you push me away!! I doubt you? I LOVE you!" Casavir roared angrily.
Lana stared at him, her mouth gaping in shock. He grabbed her forearms, holding her in his iron grasp with fingers digging into her tender flesh. His eyes were icy blue shards piercing hers, daring her to look away or balk.
"I love you, do you hear me? Do not push me away," Casavir growled. He grasped her behind the neck, pulling her roughly to him. His mouth captured hers in a hungry kiss. Casavir wrapped his other arm around her waist, pinning her firmly against his body.
Something stirred in his soul that was animalistic, predatory. Casavir felt something flare within, desiring to grab her and throw her to the ground. He wanted to capture her, devour her like a panther attacking a gazelle. His desire gnawed at him, clawing inside like a great ravenous beast that must be fed.
She slowly wrapped her arms around his torso, grasping and kneading the thin fabric of his tunic with her clutching fingers. Their lips fought, clashing for possession. He unlatched the large brooch holding her cloak around her neck, letting it fall in puddle of black wool around her feet while bending to ravage the soft skin at her neck; she threw her head back with a gasp of exhilaration.
Casavir felt the ravenous predator take control as his lust consumed him, his need for her overruling all other thought. His hunger overwhelmed him; his need to possess her, feel her warmth ate at him. He would not be denied; he would have her.
He pulled her shirt roughly over her head, his passion intensifying when he saw she wore nothing beneath her tunic. He bent his head, groaning as he tasted her.
It had been too long since they had been together this way. His hunger to feel her body beneath him and have her legs wrap around him consumed him. Casavir drew his shirt hastily over his head, tossing it carelessly to the forest floor and again capturing her lips with his own. He bent to trace her collar bone with his kisses, tantalizing her with his tongue as he blazed a trail lower.
Casavir pushed her to the ground, tumbling them both into the crackling leaves covering the ground like a red and gold blanket. The rich smell of fallen leaves enveloped them, engorging their senses with their heady scent. He bent once again to kiss her exposed flesh while caressing her with one hand.
Her skin glowed warmly under his hand as she arched her back, begging for his touch. Her breathes came in ragged gasps. Lana reached for him, drawing him into another fierce kiss. Casavir again met her lips with tongues dancing and twining with each other, their hands caressing and kneading each others bare flesh. His hands slid under the rough fabric of her pants, grasping her buttocks and pulling her over him. Casavir twined his other hand into her hair keeping her body pinned against his, revealing in the feel of her body pressed against his.
She pulled away and stood, removing her boots and trousers as he watched enthralled to see her naked before him after what seemed forever. Lana smiled wickedly before running and shallow diving cleanly into the pool. Casavir quickly jumped to his feet with a growl; stumbling in his haste to cast off his boots, trousers and undertrews before hurtling after her into the water.
He broke the surface of the water to find her grinning at him in the chest deep water. She waded across the small distance between them, embracing him and kissing him gently on the lips. Casavir wrapped his arms around her waist pulling her off the ground while she wrapped her legs around him.
Casavir smiled, "I thought I told you not to run away from me."
Lana grinned back, kissing him with a sound smack on his lips. "You said not to push you away. I believe it was you who pushed me… right down onto the leaves."
He nuzzled her cool, wet skin. "Then I will have to be more cautious with my words. You were right earlier, we did need a bath," he said with a deep, rumbling chuckle. Casavir kissed her again before picking her up and tossing her bodily into the water.
She emerged, sputtering. "And that my clever minx is for being too smart for your own good and using my words against me," he laughed as she stared indignantly.
They luxuriated in the water several more minutes kissing and reveling in their brief respite before exiting the small pool. Casavir picked her abandoned cloak from the forest floor and after giving it a good shake to remove the leaves that clung to it, pulled her close to him wrapping the cloak around them both.
"I don't think I remember enjoying a bath so much," Lana said as she pressed against him, her arms wrapped around his waist.
"Nor I, we shall have to avail ourselves of the bath at the Sunken Tavern when we get back. It would be much warmer."
Lana chuckled, "I would never have thought this of you. That could be very scandalous if we were caught bathing together."
"Then we shall just have to be sure to bar the door won't we, or maybe you could teach me to use more stealth. I wish to let them know, I have no secrets. I would shout it to the heavens that you are mine," Casavir murmured into her ear.
"I would like that Casavir. I would like nothing more then that," Lana smiled with a gentle sigh, nuzzling her head into his dark patch of thick chest hair.