Translations:
*We've got you now, American bastard!
**Alcoholism is just a stereotype for the Russians, but apparently, obesity in America is real.
***Say goodbye, asshole!
Eric was surrounded by Russian soldiers.
"*У нас есть вам сейчас, американский ублюдок!" one shouted.
"You'll never get away with this, you vodka-drinking cunts," Eric said smugly.
"**Алкоголизм является просто стереотип для россиян, но, видимо, ожирение в Америке вполне реальна!" another Russian said.
The Russian commander put a gun to Eric's temple.
"***Попрощайтесь, мудак!" he shouted.
"Okay. Goodbye, asshole," Eric said with a malicious smile on his face.
There was a gunshot.
Kyle woke up. His palms were sweaty. There were tears rolling down his cheeks. He went into the kitchen to get a glass of water. He looked at the fridge door. There was a picture of them held up by a refrigerator magnet. Kyle got a glass of water and sat down at the table. He didn't drink much water. He sat there and cried mostly. By the time he stopped, he had cried so much that the glass of water had almost overflowed. He poured it out and sat down on the couch.
It had been two weeks since Eric left. Kyle started having nightmares 3 days ago. He decided to just stay up tonight. Kyle looked at the clock. It was 5:00 A.M. He had to take Russell to school in an hour and a half. Russell had just started pre-school. Kyle had to go to work after that. He worked an office job from 7:00-2:00 in a cubicle next to Jimmy Valmer's. Kyle didn't want to worry about what he had to do later. Kyle sat there until 5:30.
"It's 5:30. Eric should be waking up right now," Kyle thought.
He stood up and walked into the bedroom. He looked in Eric's bedside drawer. There was a small scrap of notebook paper inside. Kyle picked it up and read it.
"Dear Eric,
An angel kissed a star which fell to Earth. Upon it was written what I am about to say to you now, and burned upon my heart was your precious name.
With sensual velvet kisses, with flames of passion, with lustful burning eyes I bathe this canvas in my love-soaked thoughts for you, and only you.
What person in their sane mind could resist those gorgeous brown eyes of yours which look like glass marbles shimmering in the sunlight.
I admire the way you brush your lovely brown hair, and its funny when your hair collects static and stands on end. It reminds me of a cute little hedgehog, it's so adorable!
Sitting at home on the couch and cuddling with you has always been something I've loved. Especially when we get into an argument about something pointless like the color of cheese, or the price of fish, and end up having a huge pillow fight over it, (even though I always win, and you end up crying because I beat you at a childish game!)
I really must tell you though, I absolutely adore your gorgeous smile! I think if God created something truly amazing, then its definitely gotta be your smile! I know that'a cheesy as hell, but I think your smile exceeds anything else!
With every breath in my body and every bit of my soul, I wish you a happy Valentine's Day!
Forever lost without you,
Kyle"
"Awwww, he kept the love note I wrote him in 7th grade!" Kyle said.
He just realized it was 6:30. He woke Russell up, helped him get dressed, and drove him to school. After he dropped Russell off, he called his boss.
"Hello, sir. Yes, it's me, Kyle," he said.
"Yeah, do you mind if I use one of my vacation days?" Kyle asked.
"Well, Eric left for the army a few weeks back and I had nightmares about it tonight. I didn't get much rest. I feel like I wouldn't be able to perform at full capacity today," he explained.
"Thank you, sir. I'll be back to work tomorrow," Kyle promised.
"Okay. Goodbye," he said.
Kyle arrived at home and lay down on the couch. He should've used one of his sick days. He felt truly sick. Lovesick. He felt like he couldn't move if he tried. His heart was ablaze, longing for Eric to come home and say anything, even a simple "I love you" would have sufficed. The phone rang, and Kyle answered it.
"Hello?" Kyle said
"Hey, K-Kyle," Jimmy greeted him.
Jimmy's stutter had mostly gone, but he still did sometimes.
"Oh, hi Jim," Kyle said.
"I hear you're taking a vacation day, eh?" he asked.
"Yeah, I didn't get much sleep," Kyle told him.
"Up all night thinking about Eric?" Jimmy wondered.
"Yeah, I can't get him out of my mind," Kyle complained.
"Well Kyle, perhaps you could try hanging out with y-your other friends," Jimmy suggested.
"Jimmy, Stan's been dead for 20 years," Kyle reminded him.
"I meant Kenny, or Butters, or anybody else you can think of," Jimmy said.
"Wendy moved to Arkansas, Ike got drafted into the military like Eric, Craig is in prison for calling the president a 'scrotum-licking ass milkshake', Butters is in Ohio on a business trip, Kenny's working as the commanding officer in the military, and Timmy died in that wheelchair accident a few years back," Kyle listed.
"I'll tell you what, Kyle. How about we get a bite to eat from City Wok at 2:30?" Jimmy asked.
"Sounds good. We haven't hung out in a while," Kyle said.
"Yeah. Besides, it'll be an hour before you have to pick your kid up," Jimmy told him.
"Well, I have to g-get back to work," Jimmy said.
"Okay. Goodbye," Kyle said.
"Goodbye," Jimmy said.
Kyle hung up and put down the phone. He set his alarm for 2:00 and closed his eyes. He tried to fall asleep, but he still couldn't. He took one of his prescription antidepressants to ease his mind. This helped Kyle to fall asleep.