Sokka's semiconscious eyes could see that Mommy Sabertooth Antler Thing was about to charge. He tried to look away, but that was kinda hard seeing as he was stuck in a crevice tighter than a nail in wood. Then he had the bright idea of closing his eyes, but the suspense was killing him- then again, so would getting stampeding on.

Then- it charged.

Sokka felt his life flash by his eyes. Kid him teaching littler kids how to throw stuff so it hurt. Slightly older kid him coming into a blue tent to see Katara cradling their dead mother. Older, he and her, as Katara freed Aang from the iceberg. Saving him from Zuko's warship. More forward. Meeting Toph. Forwardier. All of them VS. Azula, in a dusty village, along with...

Deadpool. Huh, now he could see Toph, Aang and Deadpool in front of him, with a the charging Mommy Sabertooth Antler Thing in the backdrop.

For some reason, Aang was yelling, "Moose-Lion! IT'S A MOOSE LION." and Deadpool was yelling, "I CALL DIBS ON THE FLESHY BITS!" And Toph was like, Meh.

And that was when he knew he was rescued.

Toph kicked the ground, and the fissure spat him up, throwing him on his face.

"Thanks" he meant to say, but the mud in his face sorta made that "Thugs". He raised his face just in time to see Mommy Moose-Lion charging towards him, again. Oh, for the luvva...

And suddenly, Aang was between them.

"Take him head on! Show him what you're made of!" Yelled Toph.

"Make me some Moose-Lion kebab!" Yelled Deadpool, with a napkin tied at his neck and his swords held like knife and fork.

"Help." Whimpered Sokka.

Hard to say which one of these rousing votes of confidence did it, but Aang dug his feet into the earth, punched the bit of the earth in front of him, and bam! A giant crag of rock erupted beneath Mommy Moose-Lion, throwing it into the trees. Deadpool followed it's flight eagerly, running into the trees.

"You okay, Sokka?" Asked Aang, looking concerned.

"What? Nah, I'm fine. Just... Almost stampeded to death is all. No biggie."

Toph was looking at the trees. "Uh... Where's Deadpool?"

They ventured through the vegetation, to see Deadpool frying a Moose-lion leg over a recently constructed spit, while he was busy slaughtering meaty bits off of the Moose-lion carcass.

Deadpool spied them. "Hey guys, guess what?! It tastes like beef!"

Sokka should, by all rights have been pissed. Instead-

"Wow, it's... It's... So, so MEATY." Said Sokka, chewing a mouthful of Moose-lion meat. "Hey guys! Check, it, OUT."

Aang politely excused himself and was pretty violently sick into a bush.

Toph reached down and picked up a furry mass- none other than Mr. Foo Foo Cuddlypoops. She put a hand on it's eyes.

"You really shouldn't see this."

Mr. Foo Foo Cuddlypoops let the girl lift him and cover his eyes from the naked cruelty he was seeing before him.

His happy childhood, spent eating mice and apples and little fleshy things had been ruined by these... Humans, especially the one in red. But Moose-lions have long memories. He would remember this. He would come back...

...for Justice. For he is Vengeance; he is the seed of their eventual downfall; he is the Moose-lion Knight.

Meanwhile, at Camp Two Girls That Hate Each-other.

Iroh and Zuko had gone to search for herbs for tea. At least, Iroh had dragged his nephew to search for herbs for tea. The scarred prince was hardly enthusiastic. And that left Azula, hands manacled, with Katara watching her.

Azula looked at Katara and smirked.

Katara looked back and scowled.

Azula sneered.

Katara gave her a patronizing smile.

Azula rolled her eyes.

Katara rolled hers.

Azula kicked a pebble at her.

It hit Katara before she had even stopped rolling her eyes.

She stumbled back, letting water leak from her water-skin into her hands. The Fire princess leapt up and shot a jet of fire from her foot, which Katara blocked with an Ice Shield, which hissed under the fiery heat of Azula's attack.

"I'll just get going, then," Smirked Azula, as she let two similar bursts assault Katara. An acrobatic piece of firebending later, she let her manacles drop smoking to the ground.

"No, you're not!" Muttered Katara.

She was not done yet. She threw blade after blade of water, but even as stiff as Azula was, she managed to dodge. Somehow. She always moved perfectly, never too less, or too much. Another blade, missed by a finger's width. The next three in rapid succession, swallowed by flames. The next, aimed at Azula's knee, missing as she jumped

And then, Azula's turn.

A massive ball of fire, right at her. With a jet of water to propel her, she got out of the way, before realizing Azula's ploy-

Forest fire.

"Maybe your friends will cook inside." Simpered Azula. "I'd rather like to see the masked buffoon boil, but," she shrugged. "Can't be too greedy."

And with that, she was running in the opposite side.

Sighing, Katara set on work dousing the flames.

Twenty Five Minutes and Three Imaginative Curses Later

"...And she got away." Finished Katara.

Deadpool seemed unimpressed. "Damn right I'm unimpressed! I had to leave my lunch! And Hotty Hot Cheeks escaped! And to cap it all, I hardly had five dialogues in the whole chapter!"

Katara looked at Aang. He looked sort of... Green.

He caught her glance. "Don't ask. Please."

Toph was still holding Mr. Foo Foo Cuddlypoops, who was giving Deadpool the evil eye.

I am The Moose-lion Knight.

And I will strike like the wind on a bad day.

"Deadpool. You kind of made this guy an orphan." Said Toph as reproachfully as she could while facing the wrong way.

I will be unexpected as an apple with worms in it.

Deadpool grinned. "Well, I sort of made him Batman! Eh? Eh? No? Okay."

I will brain this little bugger with my fearsome horns.

"You have to admit," remarked Sokka, "Moose-lions taste good."

Silent as a tree in Autumn.

Fast as a falling fruit.

At the right time.

Now.

With a squeal of righteous fury, the Moose-lion Knight launched himself at Deadpool, striking the-

-Teleporting device on his chest.

A lot of one in a million chances happened right there. For example, Moose-lion spittle is exactly the sort of liquid that the device couldn't stand- sticky, and quick to hard. Also, this particular baby Moose-lion's antlers, though tiny, were just strong enough to crack the protective exterior. And finally, the Moose-lion was so pissed it didn't stop there, but ate a few of the microchips like, well, chips.

After the spittle had lodged into the empty microchip slots and the remainders were exposed to the elements, the device was instantly rendered null and void- but with just one last, totally random, overpowered teleportation, that led to the Moose-lion Knight disappearing.

It's last thought before teleportation was, I have failed you, mother.

Then it was gone.

Awkward silence.

More Awkward silence.

Mother of Awkward silence.

"That," Said a shell-shocked Deadpool, "Was weird."

Awkward silence in which everybody agrees that the statement deserves the Greatest Understatement of All Time award.

A bulky bush is replaced by a bulkier Uncle Iroh, shadowed by a sulky Zuko. He holds a fistful of reddish-brown leaves triumphantly.

"This," he declares, "Will is either the best tea you will ever taste, or it is a poison that will kill you very nastily."

Awkwardest silence yet.

Deadpool scowled. "I liked it better when the writer wasn't updating chapters."