Chapter 5

Decided up it a notch and make it less boring for you lovely readers ;) More dialogue, and a lot of texting. Not dirty texting (I know we all wish that, don't we?), but it's texting, nevertheless. Oops! Sorry! ...I mean...spoiler alert? Happy reading!

He stared at his phone for a good five minutes as he looked at the conversation between him and Rachel. It was just a 'hey', and then a 'Rachel'. Why did he reply to her so quickly? Hell, why did he reply to her at all? She hadn't replied to him all those times he called and texted. She literally threw him off the set, without even being there. So why did she deserve to get a reply to something as impersonal as 'hey'?

Sighing, he locked his phone and leaned back on his couch. He knew why. He knew that if she were to text him even after two years, he'd answer her, and tell her the same thing he'd tell her now, if she asked. That he still loved her. Of course he did. She was the first person he fell for, and he was a strong believer in the fact that people only got one love.

Then, it hit him.

Duh, she wasn't texting him. She must have accidentally sent him a text. Must have meant it for someone else. Obviously. That's why it wasn't a 'hey, Finn', or…something. It was why she wasn't saying anything back. He was so stupid! Why did he write back?

How are you?

Once his phone sounded, he looked at it, then froze again. She replied.

So now the question was: Did she really reply to him, or was she just trying to cover up her mistake in accidentally texting him in the first place?

Why was he even trying to figure it out? He was a guy. Guys didn't care. Or think. Girls were the ones who read between the lines.

Unfortunately, he couldn't stop his train of thoughts. His heart was racing a million miles a minute.

Oh, I'm just wonderful. Hanging out at Club Margarita and I've got a couple of the hottest chicks I've ever met at my sides.

Finn stared at his screen again. He couldn't believe he just sent that to her. But maybe she deserved it. Maybe she shouldn't have broken up with him before giving him a chance to talk to her. Or giving them a chance to fix them.

…I deserved that.

I'm not apologizing for it.

I don't want you to.

Then what DO you want, Rachel? Because I'd rather not talk to you if you're just going to sign off before letting me speak.

When she didn't reply to that for over ten minutes, Finn got worried that he'd offended her. Had that been too harsh?

No, harsh was dumping him. She'd given up on them. That was harsh.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry for…all of it, Finn. I never meant to hurt you. Not like this. I was hurting you every single day, and I was scared, so I let go…of the most important thing in my life.

…you quit your job?

No, Finn. I quit…you. Us.

There is no us. There never was. You were never mine.

Every single text from him was a slap in the face. And she couldn't complain, either. She deserved every single remark. Hell, she deserved literal slaps in the face. She couldn't blame anything on him. None of this was his fault.

He was perfect, and she wasn't. So she ran away. Simple as that.

Can I please call you? I'd rather not…do this over text.

His reply came immediately. That's too bad. No.

Finn, please?

I said no, Rachel.

Her lower lip trembled, and tears threatened to fall. She was so angry with herself. So frustrated. She was a coward. A coward who didn't even have the spine to take what she deserved. She was pathetic.

Tell me what I can do, Finn. Please. How can I make it up to you?

I mean, you can always come over and give me a lap dance.

The phone slipped from her fingers, and she thought she heard her heart shatter. Finn had never said anything like that to her. He most likely never even thought such a thing. He would have never used her job against her like that. She'd never been a whore, a slut, a stripper, or a prostitute to him. She was just…Rachel Berry.

A sob escaped her throat as she shakily picked up her phone again. This was how she knew he was upset with her beyond comprehension. And it wasn't even angry upset. It was that, and every other kind of upset someone can feel, possible, mixed together. This was a part of Finn Rachel never wanted to know. A heartbroken Finn was worse than being homeless. And that's saying a lot from someone who grew up in Beverly Hills.

I don't know how else I can apologize to you. To prove to you that…I am still completely and utterly in love with you.

You know what, Rachel? That ship has sailed. You could have stayed. You could have talked to me about how you were feeling. We could have worked things out. But no. You dump me, and then start feeling sorry for yourself. I'm sorry, but even I have more respect for myself than how much you had for me.

Please, Finn. Please.

Please WHAT, Rachel? Please accept your apology? Please…let you in my life again, only to have you crush again the way you did? I'm disappointed in you. I thought that after four months, you would learn to love yourself the way I've loved you. Every part of you. I've told you a million times that you are so much better than who you think you are. It hasn't helped. At all. If my love…can't help you, then I think the only person who can help you, is yourself.

I don't know how to help myself.

I can't tell you how to do that. And I also can't tell you how to make it up to me. That's all on you. It's your move, Rachel.

Can I at least…talk to you again?

When you have something to say that's worth my time? Sure. Until then…don't keep stomping on the pieces, because it really does hurt more than you probably thought it would.

Finn…

But he never replied. She spent nearly an hour at that café, tears streaming down her face and with the phone in her hand. He never replied. He'd seen the text, but that was it.

Now she understood how badly she'd hurt him.

He couldn't believe all the things he'd said to her. He actually sounded mean without being mean. He felt like for the first time ever, he stood his ground. Didn't just give in and blame himself for everything wrong that happened in the world, and took the punishment like he deserved it. He told her what she needed to hear. What would help her before being ready for anything serious again.

There was a pang on guilt that he felt, but that was most likely from never standing up the way he just did. And to Rachel, too. His ex-girlfriend. Four months ago, he didn't even know he'd ever have a girlfriend, much less, an ex-girlfriend. My, how the tides have turned.

He had nothing more to say to her. Nothing that he knew would help her. Only she could figure out her shit. He couldn't do that for her. All he could do was support her, even if he wasn't actually speaking to her. He knew that she could do it. She was smart.

"Hello?" Finn answered his ringing phone. For a moment, he thought it was Rachel, and immediately began to think of what to say. He was glad to see the number wasn't one he recognized.

"Finn Hudson?"

"…yes?"

"My name is Carl. Carl Manning. I'm a publicity manager."

"Like…for what?" It had to be about his movie. It just had to be.

"For talent. Listen, kid, that video of your girl. The one you posted and became an internet sensation? I want her. As my new client. And I want you, too. I want the both of you. Your camerawork is golden, and with her voice? She could be even bigger than Lady Gaga and Beyonce right now."

Finn thought he was dreaming. This couldn't be real. "How'd you get my number?"

"I work in Hollywood. You really don't think I could get someone's number?"

He posted it to youtube. On his youtube channel. Because he posted most of his best work there. How did the video of Rachel go viral? Of course, he hadn't checked his emails in days, so he probably wouldn't have known if a meteor would hit the earth, either.

"Finn?"

"Uh, yeah, sorry. Um…what exactly do you want me to do?"

"I want you to say yes, then call your girl and get her to say yes, too."

"I…I need time to think about it, Mr…Manning."

"Sure. Get all the time you need, kid. You got my number. Call me as soon as you possibly can, because I need an answer by the end of the week. No pressure, of course."

"Of course. Thank you. Uh…bye."

And with that, he hung up, then stared at his phone again. He felt like he just got punked. Only…he didn't think he did. Holy shit, a publicity manager had just called him. And he wants him. For his video work. And he wanted Rachel. For her musical talent.

He immediately texted Carl Manning Rachel's number. Finn couldn't be the one telling her this. It wasn't the right time, and this guy needed an answer ASAP.

This was so weird.

"What's this?" the director held up the piece of paper in his hand.

"My letter of resignation."

"You can't resign. You signed a contract. You can't leave until the film is finished," he said, like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"Well, you know what? Fuck you. Fuck the movie. fuck the contract. I'm done with this. I can't do it anymore," she said, knowing that tears were soon going to be making an appearance.

"Is it the men? I know you said you weren't a fan of Lucas' technique, but you did great. And besides, I didn't hire anyone like him again. Although, it's a shame. His dick was huge. And it was real, too," Dex said with a nod.

Rachel's mind immediately flitted to Finn and his huge dick. Damn it, Rachel, focus. "It's not…the men, Dex. I'm finished. I'm done. I don't want to do porn anymore. It's stupid."

"I'll give you a raise!" he blurted out.

"I don't want a fucking raise, Dex! I said I'm done!" she cried out. "There are hundreds of girls lined up to do porn with you, and you know it. You don't need me. You have your beautiful men with the huge dicks, and those women who really want girl-on-girl action and aren't even playing for that team. You have it all. You don't need me."

"But…but it's so fucking hot when the girls make you scream your perfect lungs out…"

"So then find another girl who's able to make you blow your load by just watching her act. Hell, or a man who'll suck your dick while watching the girl. I don't fucking care! I'm done!" And before he could even get out another full sentence, she turned around and stomped away.

"But Rachel! Wait!"

She continued her way. She was sick of it. Sick of…seeing a new cock every day at work, and then finding out she'd have to make him orgasm in less than a minute, and in her mouth too. Sick of using her mouth and fingers to make other girls want to scream her name. She was sick of who she was. She didn't even want to hear about sex anymore.

Not unless it was Finn that she was having sex with.

She wanted just him. She didn't want anyone else. She wanted to be completely his. Mind, soul, and body. Just his.