Hey everyone! My god, it's been a hell of a long time since I've updated. But don't be discouraged! This fic still has life… I think.
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"Um, Allen?" It was the last job of the day, and Rhode sighed as the white-haired youth vacuumed the carpet noisily. Not that that was a problem, no, not at all! It was just that Allen had been cleaning the crap out of approximately one square foot of carpet for over an hour now, or rather, the few stringy threads remaining of what once was a glorious… err, patch of threads.
Rhode narrowed her eyes. Something had happened, she was sure of it, and these assumptions only increased her panic and her insecurities. She opened her mouth and screamed, "Allen!"
Allen jerked awake and stumbled into the wall behind him, tripping over the vacuum cleaner's chord in the process. "Oh my GOD, WHO ripped up the carpet?! SPEAK TO ME! WHO RIPPED UP THE CARPET?!!" Growing more and more incensed, he gave the vacuum a swift kick and shrieked, "Who's boss now, huh?"
The vacuum cleaner sprung to life and ate Allen's shorts.
"…" Said Allen. Then he lunged at the apparatus after declaring, "It's bloody on now, bitch!"
Rhode stood by in a stupor. What in the world was going on here? She thought about stopping Allen, but controlled herself when she saw that his apron and shirt was getting sucked up as well. Some things can wait, she pondered deviously, cursing that she didn't have her camera at this moment.
After the five minute tussle in which it was obvious who was victor and loser, a humiliated Allen in nothing but his underwear (Polka-dots! Cackled Rhode happily.) collapsed on the ground while the vacuum continued to zoom about, wreaking havoc.
Damn it all, thought Allen tiredly, rubbing his eyes. If Kanda were to see me now, he'd be laughing his bum off. At the thought of the samurai, the youth turned a delicate pink and his lips tingled slightly. "Argh, I gave that bloody idiot his medicine just like the people in those little manual things Lenalee gave me did!" Allen paused for a moment. "Those manuals were rather graphic though… err, doujinshis were they called?"
Meanwhile, back at the Black Order, Lenalee suddenly threw her head back in a spasm of laughter that lasted for several minutes. Komui had his phone poised at "9-1-." the entire time, thumb quivering with intensity over the final "1".
Anyhow, Rhode had already turned off the vacuum and surveyed Allen, who had his knees drawn up to his chest and was blushing lightly. He had murmured a name… Kan… Kanda?
Rhode froze. That Japanese son of a bitch.
The lithe girl ran up to Allen and pushed him down, pinning him roughly to the ground. Eyes wild, she leaned in closer until they were nose to nose.
"R-Rhode!" gasped Allen, shocked. He tried to wiggle out of the way, but Rhode stayed firm. "Rhode, y-you're acting s-strange…"
"Strange, am I?" Rhode began tearing up, "You think I'm strange, Allen?"
Allen stopped, contemplating what to say. His next words were important, he knew that much.
"I think you're… interesting. Um, yes. Very, very interesting." He gave a rather strained smile.
"Allen, I think you're absolutely wonderful and amazing and I'd do anything for you! Anything at all, just tell me!"
Rhode brushed her lips on the bewildered youth's and whispered, "I'd give you anything… money, power, my body…"
This was enough for Allen. "Rhode! You're acting completely MENTAL! Get away from me!" he cried, finding the energy to shove her off roughly.
"Don't you love me, Allen? I LOVE YOU! I love you so much it hurts! God, Allen, why can't you see this?!" She tried to close the space between them by crawling up to his side and grabbing his shoulders.
"I love you…"
"Y-you're crazy!"
"I'd kill to be with you, Allen! I'd tear my own life to shreds if that makes you happy." Rhode was openly sobbing now, raw sounds emerging from her throat.
Allen turned away. "You're not the one who can make me happy, Rhode." He quickly exited the room, leaving the girl alone.
"No… No… NO! IT WASN'T SUPPOSED TO BE LIKE THIS!" screamed Rhode in agony, scratching her arms and kicking against the floor.
"That bastard! That fucking bastard! Allen's mine, you… you…"
Her face suddenly blank as marble, she muttered, "Yuu Kanda. I… I hate you."
Then she fell into tears again.
--
Allen stopped by the supply closet and swiped a pair of black pants and a button down white shirt. It was beginning to get dark once more, and he knew he'd better stop by the parking lot soon. Kanda would kick his ass if he found out Mugen had been run over by a car, or worse, stolen.
Going down a flight of stairs, Allen ran into Scarlet and tried to run away, but the woman screeched, "Allen!" before he could escape.
"Hello, Miss Hale." Allen decided to gun it: "How-are-you-this-evening-oh-look-at-the-time-I-must-get-going-see-you-bitch-I- mean-manager!"
"A-Allen, you seen Lector anywhere? He's gone missin'. I haven't seen him in days, oh Lord…" Scarlet was barely wearing any makeup, and her hair was flat and knotty.
"Don't be worried about him, I'm sure he'll turn up soon," said Allen off-handedly, scooting down further the staircase.
"It 'aint him I'm worried about! It's all the others I'm scared for. I think somethin' bad's happenin', Allen. I heard my Yuu-pie was nearly killed the other day… You gotta watch out, Allen. You gotta tell Yuu to watch out, too." Scarlet exhaled deeply, leaning against a banister.
"… Alright." Allen dashed off before the damn skank could waylay him any longer, heart troubled.
"Don't go out alone at night!" shouted Scarlet, shaking on her stilettos, but Allen was too far away to hear.
--
Fuck. Where is Moyashi? He's late. Kanda fidgeted in bed, picking at his arm cast. His arm was pretty much healed, but the fucking quacks weren't buying any of it. Again, he glanced out into the still darkness and grimaced slightly.
The lights abruptly went out.
Turning this way and that, Kanda's eyes blindly darted around the pitch-black room. He jumped when a pair of cool hands caressed his face.
"What the fuck?!"
"Ah, there's no need for such vulgarities, Mr. Kanda. I'd prefer if you'd use a more civilized tone with me."
Kanda recognized this voice… It was that bastard from the restaurant, what was his name?
"Tyki… Mikk." Growled Kanda. He could see a glint of a smile in the darkness.
"You remembered my name! How courteous of you, my dear samurai."
At this, Kanda swung out with his one good arm, but Tyki dodged and laid a heavy blow to the dark-haired teen's stomach. Kanda coughed harshly, wincing at the pain. The hands moved from his face to his neck.
"I could end everything now, Yuu Kanda." Tyki applied pressure and Kanda began to gasp. "I could finish off your life right at this very moment. At least, that's what I'm supposed to do, hm?"
The samurai was fighting for air now, but no matter how hard her clawed at Tyki's hands, they would not budge.
"I have no problems killing you at this very moment," Tyki said smoothly, "But where would all the fun be at that?"
He released his grip on Kanda's neck, and gave a little amused chuckle.
Kanda evened out his breathing and hissed, "Killing me? That's what you're supposed to do?"
Tyki opened the windows and balanced on the sill, looking back on the samurai. The light of the young moon illuminated the stretched, Cheshire grin on his face.
"Yuu Kanda, I am a messenger, a messenger from love's thorny brambles. A messenger, which is I, and nothing more."
The man disappeared, leaving Kanda stunned, but no longer in the dark.
--
Allen was growing more and more exasperated as time went on. He couldn't find Mugen anywhere on the parking lot, despite searching for over thirty minutes. The moon had just risen, and Allen cursed the fact clouds were beginning to collect.
Zzrt! The streetlamps surrounding the lot were beginning to light now, and they illuminated the perimeter eerily, casting shadows all around.
There was a heavy thud.
Allen turned around quickly, heart thumping. In the flickering yellow of a lamp there was Mugen, glittering slightly under the glow. Relieved, Allen sprinted towards it, reaching out with both hands.
There was a low moan.
The white-haired youth froze, his fingers just touching the sword, and looked up. Towering about him was the giant Hershey's bar costume.
Allen fought the urge to laugh, but upon further inspection, his eyes widened.
Stain, upon stain, upon stain of dark, red liquid splattered the suit, and the bare legs that protruded from the costume were covered with blood.
The person was missing an arm, the stump covered in sand and debris and leaking putrid pus that dripped wetly on the ground. A clik sounded, and the person slowly raised a gun, glinting ominously, and stepped towards the youth.
Allen grabbed the sword and ran.
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Ah, further development. XD
Message me if you think you can unravel this mystery before it ends! (Believe me, it shouldn't be hard.)