Thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you for the awesome reviews! Man, you guys are tops! Thank you soooo much. :D

Disclaimer: If I own Maximum Ride or any of the other characters, I'd be in a mental hospital for having weird delusions. I would also like to credit the7thflockmember's story 50 ways to annoy Fang.

Chapter 5: Scarred for Life

"No. Way." I was dead set against it. Angeline and her weird ideas – hell no!

"But it'll be sooooo fun!" she protested. "What do you guys think?"

"Yeah! Heck – anything fun like that and I'm up for it," Zoe promptly said. Ah. Iggy had finally found his soulmate.

"So long as we don't get caught," Alvin agreed. What kind of answer is that?!

Iggy gave everyone an enormous maniacal grin, which probably meant a huge yes.

"Sure," Michelle said and giggled with Zoe.

"I'll do it if Brandon does!" Carmen chirped and shot him a look from the corner of her eye before looking down, her face slightly pink. Was this the start of love or what?

"Uh… Um… I…" Brandon faltered.

"I will personally make sure the Flying Dutchman comes after you if you don't agree to this," Angeline threatened.

"Uh, okay okay! I'll do it! Stupid Flying Dutchman," Brandon muttered darkly under his breath.

So that left Fang and I. He raised an eyebrow and turned to look at me.

"No!" I was still against the idea. Ugh! I shouldn't have come!

"Come on, it'll be fun! And we'll get to bond too!" Angeline persuaded. "Fang?"

"No," he said, following me.

"I can see where this is going," Iggy said, nodding slowly like a wise old man. "Look at it this way guys, we'll go and leave Fang and Max so that they can do their… private stuff alone here." He raised his eyebrows and cackled like a maniac.

Iggy was so going to get it! I flushed and attempted to hit him on the head, but he managed to dodge. How could this stupid blind kid be blind?!

"Max and Fang?" Zoe grinned cheekily. Oh man. Oh no. This was going to be bad. "Max and Fang, sitting in a tree! M!"

"O!" Michelle shouted. I groaned. Not this. Please not this.

"A!" Alvin said.

"N!" Brandon shouted. Man, everyone was ganging up on us!

"I!"

"N!"

"ALRIGHT, I'LL GO!" I bellowed and everybody chortled. Even Fang was smiling a little.

"So I take it as you're going to, Fang?" Angeline asked him. He just nodded. Typical.

Angeline, still giggling, began to instruct everyone on how the prank was going to be carried out.

So the plan was this: We would go to every chalet and put other people's underwear on everyone's head. I know – how lame can this get?

Apparently, Zoe was a master at the art of lock-picking. I wonder what she does during her free time. Anyway, she would pick the lock to each chalet and we, in pairs, would sneak into a room each and grab any piece of undergarment we could find from each person before going to another room – preferably belonging to the opposite sex – and place the said piece of underwear on their heads or stuff it down their shirts or something. Ridiculous! I mean I would feel totally embarrassed if I woke up to find Fang's boxers on my head or stuffed down my shirt. Ew. Gross.

We decided to leave at 12.30 am as everyone would probably be asleep by then. And that left us with… 2 hours of having nothing to do.

"I know! Let's play this game – everyone says a sentence and the next person continues! Like, I'll start with 'There was once a boy named Brandon,' and Michelle will have to come up with another sentence and then Zoe, and so on, so that it becomes a story," Carmen said. We all reluctantly agreed – it seemed to be a boring game but heck, we didn't have anything else to do anyway. Carmen beamed.

"There was once a prince called Brandon who ruled Bikini Bottom," Carmen started. I almost gagged. Prince?! In his dreams…

"He was stripped of his title and outcasted after the Flying Dutchman conned him out of his throne," Michelle said.

"So he wandered the seabed, having nothing in mind for his future," Zoe said in a sad voice.

"One day, he met an emo kid named Fang and was so frightened he peed in his pants," Alvin chuckled. Fang scowled.

"He poked Fang between the eyes and ran away screaming 'I touched a goth kid!'" I couldn't contain my laughter. Brandon, poking Fang between the eyes? Possible, and funny. Running away screaming "I touched a goth kid!"? HILARIOUS! Fang's scowl deepened and he proceeded to punch Iggy as everyone laughed their heads off.

"Uh… Fang started rapping the Spongebob Squarepants theme song," Brandon said, obviously glad that the story wasn't on him anymore.

"He stopped," Fang said. Heh. Typical Fang.

"The Flying Dutchman, spotting Fang, swooped down and tried to scare him," I said. What? I don't have anything better in mind.

"Fang screamed for help, and Max came to his rescue!" Angeline squealed. I'm really starting to hate this.

"Fang was so grateful he kissed Max." Hmmm. I wonder what it would feel like to really kiss Fang. Sigh. Curse the pot hole. Okay wait, why was I even thinking about that?

"They got married and had twins, a boy and a girl!"

"The happily married couple named their children Tooth and Minimum," Zoe chortled. This was getting absolutely ridiculous.

"Tooth had a best friend called Decay," Alvin said.

"And together they're called Cavity!" Really, I couldn't help but roll my eyes at Iggy.

"They haunted Iggy."

"Iggy was so traumatized he started dancing ballet for stress relief."

"Everyone was scarred for life and they threw up as a result."

"Iggy slipped on the vomit and fell on his butt!"

"I would never do that!" he protested.

"Says the blind kid," Michelle said.

"Ze blind kid shalt cook breakfast for yer majesty tomorrow then," he said in a huff.

"Let's just hope I don't get poisoned," she replied and grinned.

"You never know, Michelle, you never know," Iggy said darkly and shot her an evil smile.

Well one thing's for sure - I won't be the one cleaning up tomorrow morning.

"Guys, it's 12.30. Let's go!" Angeline whispered excitedly. The lights were off, to let Mr. Danny think that we were all asleep if he checked on us.

"Can we just ditch this plan? We're tired," I said, in a last attempt to wiggle out of Angeline's whacko idea.

"What is this? You want to do stuff with Fangy Wangy, huh Max?" Iggy said. "Maybe we'll get to meet Tooth and Minimum sooner than expected!"

I reached out to punch him, but as usual, he dodged away. I will get that maniac sooner or later… He brought it on himself.

"Wait! Before we go – everybody has to wear black!" Carmen said.

"Whyyyyy?" Zoe groaned.

"Well – look at yourself! People can just recognize you in an instant!" Carmen exclaimed. Zoe frowned and examined her clothes: a white shirt and lime green shorts.

"Well, if I'm lucky, maybe they'll think I'm the Flying Dutchman come to haunt them at night," she said and Carmen giggled, daring a glance at Brandon who gulped.

"It is a good idea…" Angeline mused. "Alright! Everybody – wear black!"

"But I didn't bring any black clothes!" I groaned.

"Neither did I!" Alvin said.

"Well. There is only one solution to this problem," Angeline whispered.

"Don't wear black?" I suggested hopefully.

"You wish! Heh. My brilliant idea is… BORROW THEM FROM FANG!" she said. Oh, very brilliant. Fang looked at me, eyebrows raised.

This was horrible! What if I perspired? I'd totally stink his shirt! And he'll have to wear them again! I was horrified.

"No way. No freaking way."

But Fang was already on his way up to the room. Oh man.

Iggy was in stitches.

"The next thing you know, Fang'll be wearing Max's shirt!"

"Too small," Fang replied. I jumped, not realizing that he was back, holding two sets of shirts. He passed one to me and another to Alvin. When I saw the caption on the shirt that he passed me, I giggled. Yes, me, Maximum Ride, just giggled. Why? Because printed on the shirt was this: "I'M NO GOTH KID". Ah, the contradiction of it all.

Five minutes later, we were all changed and ready-to-prank. Obviously, Fang didn't need to change his clothes since he's like always in black.

"So guys, ready?" Angeline whispered.

"Oh yeah!" Iggy and Zoe replied. Everyone else was getting into the mood.

"Can you imagine what their reactions will be like?!" Carmen chirped to Brandon. "I wish we could just tape it all!"

"Yeah…" Brandon said uncertainly.

"Geez, I wonder how Ken would react," Alvin mused. Ken and Alvin were best mates.

"Are we going to do it to Mr. Danny?" Michelle asked Angeline.

"Well…"

"I know the perfect thing to do to Mr. Danny!" Zoe exclaimed.

"What?" Zoe whispered into the Queen of Pranks' ear and they grinned evilly as a plan formulated. My stomach began churning. This was going to be so bad.

"Guys, we have something special for Mr. Danny," she said to everyone.

I swear, even Fang was smiling a little when she finished.

And as for me – well you could say I was just starting to realize that I was going to share a chalet with a bunch of crazy people for four days. The really sad thing was that I'm one of them.