Firstly, I want to thank everyone for bearing with me and the long wait. I know I promised to update by Sunday, but it totally slipped my mind that I had camp. So, I'm really really sorry for not keeping a promise. Secondly, if you realised, I have decided to start replying each individual review :D Er.. At least for those who are logged in. I just started recently, because you guys have taken your time to actually review my story and I really appreciate it a lot and in the past I was really thick-headed enough not to realise that. :D Maybe it doesn't seem important to you, but it is very much to me. So thanks, you rock! (Especially to those who have stuck with me all the way.)
Ah, self-actualization. Haha.
Anyway, thanks again for staying with me throughout, if you reviewed or not. :D The very fact that you have read up to here makes me really happy. :)
Disclaimer: I don't own Maximum Ride or any of the characters associated with the story.
Chapter 17: A Night With The Airheads
After the whole clothing fiasco, I stormed over to chalet number 32. Way to celebrate our last night here, man. First a huge humiliating incident, and now sleeping with a bunch of airheads who probably think that snoring is a huge crime or something.
I knocked on the door.
Nobody answered.
I knocked louder.
"Yo, open up!" I said loudly.
I head shuffling and muffled squealing.
"Is that Iggy? Oh, my, gosh. It must be Iggy!" Voice #1 said.
"Then… Fang must be there with him too! Oh, my, gosh!" Voice #2 squealed. I smacked my forehead with my palm. Bunch of airheads alright.
"But we're like, like, like, dressed so horribly!" exclaimed Voice #1 in horror. "I look like a toad! What is this?!"
"Did you bring your make up? I totally brought it but my mum threw it out before I knew it. Quickly!"
"Don't want to keep the boys waiting!"
"Uhuh now hurry!"
And the voices faded.
I told you they were a bunch of airheads. I glanced at my watch.
-TEN MINUTES LATER-
I'm starting to get annoyed here. Huh. So much for not wanting to keep the boys waiting. I hammered on the door as loudly as I could. I heard someone scream upstairs in one of the rooms.
It sounded as if a hoard of people was thundering down the stairs. I snickered. They were going to get a huge surprise when they opened the door. The door flew open.
"Hiiiii Iggy! Hiiii Fangy!" Brigid said in a fake high falsetto voice. Her eyes were closed and she pursed her lips.
"We've been waiting for you!" Mandy said flirtatiously. Eh? Mandy? I pushed that aside. Her eyes were also shut.
"Whaddya mean, waiting for me? I've been waiting for ten freaking minutes for you to 'dress up'!"
"Why do you sound like Max, Fangy? Are you impersonating her?" Brigid asked disapprovingly.
I snickered and shoved past them. They had both their lips pursed in hope. And have I described what they were dressed in?! Biki-freaking-nis!
I stomped up to the room. There was no other sign of life besides the two twits. They'd probably scared the others out or something. Or the other six people had felt the need to get away from them for the sake of their sanity. Yeah, I'd go with the latter.
"What are you doing here?!" I heard Brigid say, outraged.
"I'm here for the night," I said. "Supposed to be rooming with Lissa. Whoever she is."
"That's me, you idiot," Mandy said snottily. I was genuinely confused.
"But aren't you Mandy?" I asked.
"What rock have you been living under?" Brigid rudely asked.
"The purple one under the coconut tree on the beach," I replied snidely.
"There's really such a rock?" Lissa asked, her eyes wide. "Can you show me? It's purple too! That's my second favourite colour next to pink! But there're so many coconut trees on the beach!"
"There's no such thing, you airhead," Brigid hissed.
"Look who's talking," I said.
"You are," Brigid said. I wanted to scream in frustration already.
"Forget it," I muttered.
I trudged up the stairs, Brigid and Lissa at my heels. Just like dogs. Hey! That would make them bitc –
"You're going to stay with us tonight?" Lissa asked, horrorstruck. Apparently, it takes about five minutes for something to process in that extremely thick head of hers.
"Yeah! Omigosh, I'm so excited! We can like do manicures and all! And gossip and talk about how hot the guys are, and we can totally exchange numbers and make a girl bond!" I said sarcastically.
"I didn't know you did things like that," Lissa said, her eyes wide.
"Because I don't!"
"Then why did you say you want to do it?"
"Ever heard of the term sarcasm?"
"Not really."
"Lissa!" Brigid burst. "You're just making a fool of yourself!"
"Actually," I pointed out. "You both are. Making kissy faces in bikinis at the door hoping it was Fang and Iggy? Please."
At that, both of them turned bright red.
"Hey! Ohmygod, you don't have any boobs!" Lissa suddenly said, and whacked me… there. What the hell?! I reeled back, clutching on the banister of the stairs and stared at her.
"What the heck was that for?!"
"I don't like you! You don't have any boobs!" She scowled. "Mine are too big! At first I thought it was like, cool and all that but now it's like – eurgh! Well, at least Brigid's are worse."
"What?!" Brigid screeched. Maybe those witches were her distant relatives or something.
"Okay, you know what, enough with this boob talk. I don't like you either. Can I go to sleep now?" I asked.
"But we can't!" Brigid said and whirled around, her eyes widened innocently. Not to mention it was obviously fake.
Boy, was I in for a night.
Let me give you one word of advice. Okay, maybe more than a word.
NEVER. EVER. ROOM. WITH. PEOPLE. LIKE. BRIGID. OR. LISSA.
They refused to let me sleep in peace. When I crawled into bed, they pulled off the covers and told me they wanted to play games with me to get to know me more. When I crawled under the bed instead, they tickled me and pulled me out. I even resorted to going to the toilet but their voices were to shrill and ugh! I felt like slapping them.
So anyway that's how I ended up here playing pointless games like Shoot, Shag and Marry.
"What the hell is that game about?" I asked, as a sinking feeling went into my stomach. The name itself said it all.
"Well, we'll give you the names of three guys and you'll have to say out of the three, which one you'd shoot, who you'd rather shag and which one you'd rather marry."
"I'm so excited!" Lissa said eagerly. Brigid grinned and I scowled.
"Okay, so Lissa, we'll start with you! Come on, Max, let's think of some guys!"
"Er. Brandon."
"Fang! And Alvin!"
Lissa didn't even hesitate.
"Shoot Brandon, shag Fang and marry Alvin!"
Poor Fang.
"Bri! Now it's your turn! Hmm…"
"Iggy."
"Mr. Danny and Spongebob!"
"Spongebob isn't counted!"
"Is too!"
"Is not!"
"Can we get on with this already?" I said, annoyed. Bunch of pansies.
"Fine! Shoot the sponge, shag Iggy and marry Mr. D."
"He's gay, you know," I said on a whim. Both their eyes widened a fraction and they stared at me as if I had just said that Fang was the ugliest guy on Earth or something. Actually, Fang's the hottest guy on Earth. But I didn't say that, okay?
"You're kidding," Brigid assumed. I shook my head.
"Nope."
"NO WAY!" Brigid and Lissa screamed. I nodded solemnly.
"OHMYGOD!" Lissa screamed. "WHAT IF HE WANTS FANG?"
"FANG IS TOO HOT TO BE IN THE SAME ROOM AS MR. DANNY!"
"Okay, shush!" I said, seriously PO-ed.
"Let's play another game!" Lissa-with-the-split-personality-issues chirped.
"First Thought!" Brigid yelled.
"What's that?"
"Well, we give you a subject and you have to say the first thought that comes to your mind."
"Like, I tell Brigid beach, and she'll have to say the first thought that comes to her mind, which is…?"
"Seeing Fang in swimming trunks!!!!!!!!!" I rolled my eyes.
"Okay since I started first, Max you'll start! Hmmm…"
"Basketball players!" Brigid said.
"Basketball players?" I asked, my tone monotonous.
"Yeah! Come on, what comes to your mind when you first think about basketball players?" Lissa asked eagerly. I snorted.
"Loose singlets and a whole load of armpit hair," I said seriously. Brigid and Lissa made disgusted faces.
"Only that? No Troy Bolton? No hot guys?" Lissa asked disappointedly.
"You. Watch. High. School. Musical," Brigid uttered, shocked. "All those years we've known each other and you never told me!"
"Well, I wanted Troy to myself."
"You… you… AGHH!!" Brigid screamed and threw herself at Lissa and started scratching at each other. "I WATCH HSM TOO YOU KNOW! WE COULD HAVE TOTALLY BITCHED ABOUT GABRIELLA!"
I quietly sneaked out of the room into another one and locked the door. Despite that, I could still hear them screaming at each other.
Well, at least they were fighting over some High School Musical person, not Fang.
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