Hey all, sorry I haven't been updating as regularly as I have with all my other fics. I'm writing original fiction like mad. I have a manuscript under consideration with a publisher, so I've been keeping at it, trying to make a career out of this.

Mike, Bryan: I blame you. You'll see that in print one day, mark my words.

Thank you all for the wonderful reviews, for sticking with this story, and for pimping me out.

On that note, we continue with our story in progress...

What To Expect When You're Expecting

Azula was pregnant.

The news spread like wildfire…which, in the Fire Nation, wasn't very fast, considering that Firebenders could shoot controlled, high-speed fireballs out of their fists. Suffice to say, though, that everyone knew in due course.

The royal physicians estimated she was perhaps two months along. She wasn't showing yet—except for her unpredictable temperament and morning sickness, which lasted throughout the day and well into the evening.

Unfortunately, the scandal around the princess's illegitimate unborn child had overshadowed another piece of important and much happier news—news the people had been waiting for since the royal wedding.

"I'm late," Katara whispered excitedly to anyone who'd listen. "I'm so very, very late, and so very, very excited!" Her eyes shone as she bounced around the palace, sometimes followed by an equally elated and extremely nervous Zuko.

"Katara, my sweet, my precious, please, stop running around!" He grabbed her to stop her from jumping up and down, jouncing the precious life forming within her. "You need to be careful in these early months…"

"But I'm so happy!" She giggled. "Am I glowing yet? Do I show?" She smoothed her hands over her still-flat belly, beaming. "I'll make a wonderful mother, won't I, Zuzu?"

"Of course you will…" He kissed her lips and hands over and over again. "Now if you'll come with me, we're going to have a nice, quiet sit in the garden while Uncle brings you some special tea…"

"I'm not made of glass, Zuko." Despite her sweet words, he could hear her annoyance. "A woman's body can handle quite a lot of stress. Babies are very resilient."

"Just, please, for my peace of mind…" He begged with his eyes.

Katara smiled. She couldn't be anything but happy with her husband at this moment. She patted the top of his head. "Okay. Oooh, you are so cute!" She pinched his cheek. "Oh, I do hope the baby looks like you!"

Arm-in-arm, Zuko and his wife went to gardens to sit in the shade of a willow tree, where Iroh had set up a lovely afternoon tea. A number of teapots hosting a bevy of brews, a platter of fruit and another of buns and other tasty confections were spread across the tatami mat. Azula was there with him, perched on a squat stool instead of on the ground, like Uncle. A second stool was available for Katara.

"I can sit on the ground," she told him.

Iroh grimaced. "Well, just for safety's sake…won't you use the stool? Sitting cross-legged will squish your tummy and make it hard for the baby to grow. Besides, it'll be more comfortable for your back."

If anyone should be watching his back, it was Iroh. But she took the stool, not really wanting to argue the point. Zuko sat next to her—one of the few times his head was actually below hers. Across the way, misery carved Azula's pale face as she wrung her hands together. She looked more wretched than Mai in the winter during her time of the month.

"How are you feeling today, Azula?" Katara asked, happiness brimming in her eyes. "Isn't it wonderful? We'll get to be mothers together!"

Azula turned green.

"I think I'm going to be sick again." The princess surged to her feet and pelted into the bushes where she loudly upchucked what little was left in her stomach after a whole day of morning sickness.

"Oh, dear." Katara sat back down when Iroh waved her off. "That can't be good."

"I've been giving her this special blend of energy tea to make up for what she keeps losing," Iroh indicated the pot he held. He poured a cup of the blacker-than-night and thicker-than-mud brew. A horrid smell like Sokka's socks wafted up from the cup. "Here. Drink up. It'll be good for the baby."

"Oh, I don't need that," Katara said, eyeing the tea. "I haven't been feeling any morning sickness…"

"It's a traditional Fire Nation pregnancy tea," Iroh explained—as if that would get her to down the disgusting-smelling beverage. "It's chock full of good things to help make the child strong."

"Really, I—"

"You have to drink it," Zuko urged. "Our child will be the heir to the throne. This will make him a powerful bender."

Katara felt her cheek tick. "A powerful Firebender, you mean?"

Azula shuffled back just then. She looked about twice as bad as she had a moment ago. "Okay, I drank your nasty tea, Uncle. Can I please have some watermelon now?"

Iroh frowned. "I told you, you can't eat watermelon. And neither should you, Katara." He snatched the slice out of her hands just as it touched her lips.

"What? Why?" she whined.

"Bad chi. The melon's too cold, and there's too much liquid in it. It could harm the baby."

She stared at him, his pseudo-logic confounding her. "Cold? Too much liquid? Is this another Firebender thing?"

Zuko and his uncle exchanged wary glances.

"Have you guys even considered that the baby might be a Waterbender? Or not a bender at all?"

"That won't happen," Zuko insisted. "Not as long as we stick to your diet."

She barely had time to be infuriated by Zuko's arrogant comment when she heard the second part. "My…diet?"

The old general produced a scroll from the volumes of his sleeve. "A traditional pregnancy diet," he declared, "consists of foods and beverages that will ensure a strong and healthy baby, and eliminates things that may harm the baby's development."

She took the scroll from him and scanned the extensive list.

"I can't have curry?" she frowned. "Why not? I love curry!" Just talking about it made her want some.

"It'll make the baby foul tempered," Iroh told her, wryly adding, "Ursa ate a lot of curry when she had Zuko."

Katara scowled and pointed at another item on the list. "No bananas? What's wrong with that?"

"All kinds of things," Iroh said. He tugged on his beard. "None of which I can remember right now, but I guarantee you it's the right thing to do. Why, my own mother didn't eat any bananas, and look how I turned out!"

She declined from editorializing. "And this…Devil Fish? What's wrong with that?"

"You don't want a scaly devil baby, do you?"

"This is ridiculous," she shoved the list at her sister-in-law. "Have you seen this, Azula?"

"Please," the princess groaned, gray-faced, "don't talk about food to me…"

"I am not going to follow this ridiculous old wives' diet," the Fire Lady declared imperiously, getting to her feet. "Gran-Gran will stick up for me, too. Pregnant women in the Southern Water Tribe could eat anything they wanted, and none of their children were scaly, hot-headed devil babies!"

"You didn't have much in the village to eat apart from fish, seals, sea prunes and lichen," Zuko pointed out. "You didn't have the variety of food the palace offers."

"You can't stop me from eating what I want—or what the baby wants!" she shouted, and stomped away.

"Oh, dear." Iroh's brow puckered. "She didn't drink her tea."

"Stop with the tea," Azula moaned wretchedly, clutching her stomach. "I just want a little watermelon to wash out my mouth. Just a small bite…" She reached for a piece, but Iroh simply moved the platter to the far end of the mat, ignoring her whimpered pleas.

The Fire Lord watched his wife's back as she exited the gardens. "I may not be able to keep her from eating what she wants," he said with a supercilious leer, "But Cook doesn't have to make anything she asks for."

"If you're thinking what I think you're thinking, she's not going to like that one bit," Iroh commented. "You know what Katara's like when she wants something—she'll stop at nothing to get it."

"Uncle, this is for the good of the Fire Nation and the security of the throne!" His eyes shone with conviction. "She'll stick to her diet, all right, and my heir will be a powerful, talented Firebender. I'll see to that personally."

And because she had no other way to express her disagreement, Azula leaned over and puked in her brother's lap.