Homefronts

They called it a "nesting" instinct—but Azula being Azula, she couldn't confine the impulse to her room and nursery. Hell, she'd remake the world for her baby if it weren't such an exhausting prospect.

So the princess settled for redecorating the entire palace. Not that anyone could have stopped her…

Except for that other pregnant lady in the palace, of course.

"Lavender," Katara insisted between gritted teeth, tugging on the design plans between her and her sister-in-law, "is a much more soothing color."

"But yellow inspires happiness," Azula returned with a malicious grin, gaining another centimeter on the blueprints. "You want happy babies, don't you?"

Aang, being the Avatar, had the temerity to intervene. "Why don't you guys just paint everything white?"

The daggers from the women's twin glares crucified him instantly.

Unable to agree on anything, they each got half the palace for their nesting project, a painted line down the middle of the main building demarking the limits of their influence.

But the forces of fire and water rarely obeyed boundaries, painted on or not.

Katara would surreptitiously order a swath of gauzy silver-starred tulle to encroach upon Azula's side of the palace. In retaliation, Azula would set the fabric alight and have the Dai Li pin up her own scheme of gold-striped silk…which Katara would then ruin with an "accidental" washing.

Soon, it became an all-out war.

It was a close fight. Katara, being the Fire Lady, had the entire palace staff under her command. But Azula had the stealthy, efficient and utterly loyal Dai Li; and being the infinitely more frightening matron of the two, she managed to conscript anyone unfortunate enough to cross her path into her sunny-yellow cause.

"Yellow, like the sun…like Agni," she was often heard murmuring, backed by Kisu's miserable yowls as she petted him just a little too fervently. The princess's eyes shone with zealousness. "My little baby will be happy and healthy and smiley…not some stick-in-the-mud wet-blanket bore." She cut her eyes toward the purple border.

"Not that I don't think that's a bad thing, pooky-bear," Jet drawled, applying yet another coat of paint to the wall of the nursery, deliberately flecking his bared chest with sexy, xanthic splotches to (unsuccessfully) snare Azula's attention, "but you've been at this for almost two months. You guys need to stop this decorating war before it gets out of hand."

She whirled on him, thunder in her face. "Who asked you?"

He shrugged deeply. "I'm just saying because I care."

Azula cared, too! Didn't anyone see that?

Meanwhile, Katara and Zuko—well, mostly Katara—were trying to choose a painting from the palace gallery to place in the nursery—a focal point for the room that would draw the eye and tie the froufrou purply color scheme together. Not that they would have found anything with a relieving trace of blue, purple or, spirits forbid, white in it.

"Why is everything in this country red and gold and black? Don't any of the artists in the Fire Nation paint something other than doom and gloom portraiture?" Katara asked in exasperation, scowling at the enormous floor-to-ceiling painting of Fire Lord Sozen.

Zuko rubbed the back of his neck. "Actually…no."

The Waterbender tapped her chin. "Maybe I should commission someone to do something for the baby's room. I'm sure royal patronage would give them a little inspiration."

Zuko mentally tallied the costs of all the decorations and furniture the soon-to-be mothers had racked up so far, then added the hefty sum for patronizing a house artist. He pinched the bridge of his nose and let out a quiet sigh.

It was times like these he remembered Uncle Iroh's advice:

"Just nod and smile, Zuko. That's all you have to do to keep your wife happy. No, seriously, keep her happy, or you'll never hear the end of it."

He clenched his teeth together in a manic grin and vigorously nodded to Katara.

The Waterbender beamed. "You're the best Fire Lord husband ever." She kissed the tip of his nose and waddled away, the picture of roly-poly motherhood.

"Whoop-ah, Sparky," Toph chuckled, appearing out of nowhere. "You've got it so bad."

He grumped. "I don't see you taking sides in this stupidity. How'd you manage that?"

Toph shrugged. "What can I say? I'm trained in the art of awesome—" she paused, "seeing" something approaching, and grinned "—and avoidance."

And with that, she folded her arms across her chest and was swallowed up by the ground, just as Azula rounded the corner.

"Zuzu! I need more money!"

Zuko sincerely wished then he'd been born an Earthbender.