So this is it. The last part to a story that was supposed to be only a one shot but my friend, the one who I was writing it for, caskettshipper3, deserved more. So I made it longer than I had originally planned. I have had amazing responses to this, so thank you. But I hope you don't hate the ending, I didn't want to drag it out any longer. But if you like the concept of lyrics leading a story, leave some in a comment or message and I'll write it for you. Music moves me and inspires me. Alright thank you again.
Love Always, ChelseaMarieC
"And up until now I have sworn to myself that I'm content with loneliness because none of it was ever worth the risk, well you are, the only exception, you are the only exception…"
I couldn't say anything. What would I say? Oh so you're leaving, no big deal? Um no. I wanted to yell and scream but most of all I wanted to hang on to every moment that I could get with him. One week with him was better than not knowing him at all. But he just waited me out and I just started to cry.
"I'm so sorry." He went to wipe away my tear but I couldn't let him. I needed to let him know.
"Don't be. I want you ok? I want every minute I can get with you." And then I refused to hold back, I didn't have time for that. I pulled his face to mine and begged for him. His lips relented. He melted with me. Then I realized that he was still behind the couch. I dove into him, knocking us both on the floor.
"Ouch." And we couldn't contain our laughter. But when he stopped laughing and looked up at me, I knew that I would do anything to not lose him, to make it work. "Kate, I know I love you."
"And I know I love you too." I kissed him softly once more.
"Ok bitch, you better be up!" Madison slammed the door shut and tossed her shoes aside. She had no idea that I was behind the couch with Rick. "Kate?"
I stood up and pulled Rick up with me. "Um, I am awake. Or should I say we are awake." I smiled so brightly and felt my face blush.
There she stood, looking marvelous and still in yesterdays clothes. Her hair was lightly ruffled, I knew she had sex with Jeff last night, I just never saw her actually sleep over. She tried to look cleaned up and not like a living Walk of Shame.
"Oh, I see. Um, Kate, can I talk to you?" She didn't wait but yanked me away after her and tossed me into her room. "Are you kidding me?! You had a man spend the night?" And then she looked at me. "Oh no. Tell me you didn't wear that." She scanned her hand over my outfit and I just laughed.
"One, we didn't have sex. Second, I fell asleep with him on the couch, and third we are in love." She looked at me like I was crazy.
"Yeah, you just met him. It's not love Kate, it's lust. You will realize that soon enough." She slid out of her dress and I slumped on her bed. "Don't be bummed, it happens to me all the time. But Jeff and I, we are serious. He wants to start a relationship."
"But Jeff is leaving in a week." That stopped her mid, removal of her bra.
"What are you talking about? Don't you think he would have told me that?" She lets a smidge of panic resonate on her face before she shakes it off.
"Rick is leaving in a week, and Jeff, your boyfriend, is leaving with him. They got their orders. Don't you think that if he was serious with you, he would have told you? I am not just in lust with Rick, I'm in love with him. I know the difference. And if you don't approve, then I don't care. Madi, you are my best friend and I would like you to be on board with this. But, I'm gonna love him this week because I don't know what will happen. But for now, I am gonna love and live with him." I couldn't help telling her off. She didn't know how I felt about him. I felt that if I lost him, my world would come crashing down.
"Would you like to get out of here?" He pulls me into his arms and lightly spins me around.
"Yes." I run and get changed into a white, tank top and jean short, overalls. I slide my pink sneakers on and waltz out of my room with a shake in my hip. He laughs and then goes speechless when I whip my hair and run my tongue over my red lips.
"Ok, um, yeah. I am gonna have to control myself around you." He walks up, slowly and demands a kiss. I cave.
"I want this week to be the best week of my life."
And we kept our promise.
Everyday we did something different. Here's how our love blossomed.
Day one:
Visiting every little secret spot of mine. First was a back alley to and underground drama club. He laughed when I pretended to out on a one woman act. But it turned into a fairytale. He got up, put on a slow song and waltzed with me around the stage. He kissed me tenderly and when I was in his arms, I knew. I knew that the stirring feelings in me were love. I was madly in love with him. I couldn't turn back from this.
"Kate? I don't want to let you go. Will you still be mine while I'm gone?" He didn't have to even ask me. Just by his eyes, he had me.
"Always. I only want you." And in my kiss, it was anger for the fact that he was leaving, it was sad because I knew I had to say goodbye, and it was pain because no one has ever made me feel like this, and it was love because I knew that I never wanted to fall out of love with him.
"Don't let go of me." It was surprising hearing that from his lips and it not being me that had said it.
"As long as you don't let me go." And we stayed still, him just holding me, on a quiet stage with little light.
He took me to dinner and we hitched a cab to get to the Greenwood Lake. And with our clothes on, we dove in, hand in hand. Because I knew that I would always dive with him, to wherever. Soaking wet and cold, we took a walk. I was afraid of the dark and he didn't laugh at me.
"You know how beautiful this is." He pulled me up on a rock and looking out into the water, he pulled me in his lap. "I mean, where can you get this view?"
"I was thinking the same thing." But I wasn't looking at the water, I couldn't tear my eyes away from him. His every nook and crevice of his face demanding being look at. I was marveled by him and astounded that he could make me feel like this.
"I don't want this night to end." And he kissed me but all I tasted was his pain. It was bitter and heart wrenching.
"Neither do I." But we knew that one day was down and we only had six more to go.
Day Two:
He slept the night, in my bed, no sex. But I opened my eyes that morning to him. And that's how I wanted the rest of my life to be. I kissed him awake and his hands immediately wrapped around me, pulling me closer. All the while, his eyes were closed.
"Do we have plans today?" He mumbled against my lips and I refused to answer him. He lightly pushed me away and smiled with his forehead against mine. "No really, what are we doing today?"
"Swinging on the swings in Central Park." I kissed his nose and dove out of bed, yanking my long t-shirt down as I slid out.
"I've done that before." He leaned on his elbow, leaving his scent further into my sheets.
"But not with me." I gesture for him to turn around and I quickly change into a pair of shorts and a loose t-shirt. When I'm done, I leap on top of him.
"You win. I'll get up in a minute." He closes his eyes but I just dig my knees into his ribs. "Ok, I'll get up now."
I get off him, quickly brush my teeth, and pull my hair into a ponytail. While I wait for him, I feel bad. I haven't talked to my parents in a couple days, nor Kellie, nor Madi. But part of me is still mad at her. But I'm forced to face her when I leave to get a drink. She is busy scrambling eggs, in her silk nightie, which means that Jeff is in her room.
"Mads, I'm sorry, but you didn't believe me." She succumbs to my words and turns to face me. She has fresh tears in her eyes. I run right to her. I begin to wipe away her soaked cheeks. "What's wrong?"
"I was an ass to you. I should have believed you. I shouldn't have tried to tell you how you felt. It's just Jeff didn't tell me and Rick told you. What does that say about me? That I'm only gonna be his girlfriend until he finds someone he really wants to be with? Did Rick ask you to be his girlfriend?" She begins to shake and before this turns into a full blown wail, I lift my shirt and wipe under her eyes.
"No but we don't need to. We can just sit and not talk. We can lie in each others arms without having to move. We didn't fall asleep for an hour after we came home but he just held me and looked at me. That's just us. But you and Jeff are different. You've been closer with him than I have with Rick. You know everything about each other. And I'm still learning. Face it, it's been you and Jeff for a long time now. So, you are gonna confront him and ask him why he waited to tell you? Because, Mads, he has to love you." I pulled her into my arms and didn't care that because of her, my shirt was getting slowly soaked.
"Let's go my love." Rick strolled out in cargo shorts and a loose white t-shirt. But when he saw me holding a crying Madi, he stopped smiling. "What happened?"
"You love Kate more than Jeff loves me is what's happening. You're her boyfriend but Jeff can't call me his girlfriend. That's wrong. I know him better than you know her. And yet, you guys are in love. Well I'm in love with him but he only thinks of me as a bed buddy. He has never looked at me like you look at Kate. I want that." She stopped crying and became hostile. "It's not fair. I'm not the virgin here and yet…"
It didn't hurt me nor did it make me embarrassed because I knew what she meant. Madison thinks that a guy loves you for sex, but I went and found a guy who loves me without sex. She can't understand that. And then I know, she doesn't even have those feelings in return. She loves him but he doesn't understand how she feels about it all. And she deserves that, she deserves love.
"Madi, I'm so sorry. I didn't know how you felt about him. I didn't." She just shakes her head and leans down against the kitchen counter.
"It doesn't matter. He won't feel the same way. It isn't in him." She stops crying and lightly chuckles. "I thought that for sure I'd find love before you. You're lucky Kate. You have someone who looks like you are the reason to breathe."
I can't resist looking at Rick and I see what she is talking about. Even though she is the one who is hurting, he can't seem to not look at me. He smiles lightly and my heart cries out more. I know that we are gonna be this way, Always. Well at least until he leaves. I don't know how long he wants to take this. I just know how long I want it to last.
"Madison, I know Jeff, better than you do because guys tell each other stuff that they would never tell girls. So listen to me, he is scared. He doesn't want to have only to lose."
I know that feeling, but I keep my mouth shut. I have held myself back from a lot of things but losing Rick has made me appreciate everything more. I will never hold back from him because he is my everything. And I have to hold tight until there is nothing left but memories.
"Should I not pressure him? Because I don't want to lose him while he's here." She stops her crying and is now charged with a newfound hope.
"Yes. Just ride it out, that's what he is doing." Rick hugs her and she just winks at me. I can't help but laugh at it all.
"Are we all ready to go now?" I gently hold Rick's hand in mine and Madi nods. "Thank you and good luck." I know that as I pull the door closed, she will be heading back into that bedroom and surprising Jeff with a whole other side of her, the kind that is seriously detached. But I will be left to deal with the aftermath of it all, when they both leave.
"So, to the swings?"
"Thank you for doing that back there, it meant a lot to her and a lot to me. She worries about nothing so seeing her worry about him, that was weird." I lean towards him before turning my car on and watch his hair light up in the morning sun.
"You know that it was all a lie. Jeff doesn't want anything serious with someone who wants to be serious, he only wants it if they don't. So by telling her that he doesn't want anything serious, she won't do that and then he'll want it, so eventually she wins. She gets what she wants and so does he except he thinks it's his idea."
"How could you do that to her? Wait, you helped her? I'm confused. That was a lot to process." I let him rest his hand on my knee while he tried to clear all the clutter.
"It's all good honey. She'll thank me, and in return, thank you."
"Ok. I trust you."
The day was one from the pages of my fairytales. He spent the entire afternoon with me in the park. Swinging on the swings, and walking with me, sometimes hand in hand. It was fascinating but he didn't spend the night again. He actually went to Jeff's place. Dinner was lonely without him but I was able to eat with my parents.
"So, that boy, Rick, right? He seems really nice and respectful." I know it was my dad's way of testing the waters with me.
"Yeah he is a gentleman. You have nothing to worry about. He's leaving in a few days anyway." I choked on the words and tried to not let in that I am completely devastated. But how could I let that show when I'm with him? He matters too much and time matters too much.
"He's deploying again?" My mom's hint of sympathy cuts me to the core. I can only nod. She grabs my hand and my resolve crumbles. "Oh honey." Before I know it, she is holding me in her arms.
"I love him. And I only have two more days with him. He's visiting his family tomorrow. And I won't see him for three days. What am I going to do?" I let her hold me like a child and know that I have to drink. A couple of beers to numb me sounded like a good idea.
"It will be ok. We can hangout if you want." She knew as she said it to me that, that sounded like no fun compared to what I could be doing.
"I'm full. I think I'm gonna head to bed." I quickly kissed them both then quickly ran to my place. Madison wasn't there which made me want to cry even more. I had no one. I grabbed a six pack and slid my phone out and noticed that sometime between I said goodbye and ate dinner, Rick had texted me.
"Hey love of my mine. The next three days are going to be rough. But just think, I can make it up to you next time I see you. We will make this work."
That was it. I wanted nothing to do with a text, I wanted the real thing, I wanted him in my arms, him on my lips.
"Bitch. Open up!" Kellie's voice rang through my silence and I had no choice to let her in. "Yes your parents called me. Three day sleepover begins now. Food, pajamas, romances, and beer." She shoves past me and drops her little tote bag that is so crammed with stuff that it's actually spilling over, onto the floor.
"Thanks, I needed someone." I pull her into a hug and she drags my slumped frame back to the couch. "I won't see him for two days and when I do, I'll have to say goodbye."
"And you will make it work. You love him and he loves you. It will all be ok, I promise. Just trust me." Kellie opens a beer and immediately sets herself up on my couch.
"You think?" I make sure that my t shirt is not wet before I lean on her. She hands me a bag of cheetos and tries to get me to cheer up. It will be a long three days.
"Get changed and let's watch all the Nicholas Sparks movies, starting with our favorite, "A Walk to Remember". Okay?" She pushes me off her and I watch her set everything up. At least I won't be alone.
"You are the only exception…"
Those three days were brutal, I didn't even get to text him that much. What made it worse was that he was only mine for one more day. His parents wanted to send him off, which was only fair. So as I waited for him to pull up, I chewed nervously on my nails. My sneakered feet kicked at the curb and the light t-shirt I had on, the same color as his eyes, was suddenly feeling so heavy. My blue jean shorts kept riding up and my hair was surely getting messy in the wind. But none of that mattered, I was too excited to see him.
When a truck pulled down my street, my body couldn't be contained. I was bouncing in place and ran right to the side of the car where he sat. I didn't pay attention to who was with him, I just needed to hold him.
"You're back!" I practically leapt into his arms. I didn't kiss him, I just wrapped my arms around his neck and my legs around his waist. I clutched him tight and didn't care that I might have been coming off really clingy.
"I missed you too Kate." He kissed my neck and I swear I melted. "But I want you to meet a few people." He tapped my back and I released my grip on him. But he grabbed my hand so we didn't lose contact.
"Hello Katherine, I'm his mother, just call me Martha." A woman with flaming red hair and the same blue eyes pulled me into a hug right away. "Those three days, he wouldn't shut up about you, I just had to meet you."
"Mom, it's Kate." He grabbed my hand and shook it.
"I don't mind it. It's nice meeting you too. Wow, I can't believe how excited I am. This is great." I was truly happy, I wasn't nervous or freaked that he hadn't warned me, it felt great meeting his family.
"I'm glad. And this is my husband, Jackson." A very ruggedly handsome man stepped out from the back and behind him was a little girl. He looked just like Richard and I had to calm down. He was hot as well.
"Nice to meet you Kate. My boy is very fond of you." He shook my hand but I pulled him into a hug.
"And I'm Alexis." She was about Kellie's age, maybe a year or so younger and was a spitting image of Martha. "I'm his little sister. And he was right, you are gorgeous." She waltzed right up and hugged me. When she pulled away she kissed my cheek and grabbed my hands in hers. "We are gonna be great friends."
"I'm sure we will." I walked back to Rick and quickly asked them all up to my place. I was suddenly very glad that Kellie had helped me do some light cleaning.
This day was going by so fast and that scared me. In just a few hours, I would have to say goodbye to him. I knew why his family wanted the last day with him, I would have too but I was just the girlfriend. I quickly made some pasta and chicken and sharing the last day with him and his family wasn't what I pictured but it didn't bother me. I loved them already. They were so nice to me and I knew that this wasn't the end. I gave them all a quick tour, introduced them all to my parents and watched as they all connected.
"Hey, come with me." Rick gently whispered into my ear and I knew I'd follow that voice anywhere. "I wanted to say goodbye properly." He pulled me into the shadows of a bush in my backyard and slid something out of his pocket.
When I saw the ring I freaked. "Um, are you?"
"No, but this is a promise ring. A promise that you'll wait for me. So, Katherine Houghton Beckett, will you wait for me?" He held the simple white gold band out to me and I couldn't help but cry. "I didn't mean to upset you."
"No you idiot, I'm crying because I'm happy. I love you so much and of course I'll wait for you. I'd wait a lifetime for you." I pulled him close and gave him our final kiss, for a while not forever.
"Always." He grabbed my body up and into his and our kisses only became hotter and heavier.
I wasn't ready to let him go but the sound of his family leaving, prompted us to leave the bush. When he dragged me back out after him, I clutched his hand like he was my life saver. I knew that this was goodbye for a while. That the only way we could talk would be on Skype calls and letters. But I knew that it was all worth it. I would wait for him. Always.
"I love you, know that. You are the only exception." I kissed him once more and I know I looked like I was in pain and the fresh tears didn't help. But I was sad. This was our goodbye.
"I'll be back for you. Always." He kissed me once more and I let him go. Watching the car drive away, made me topple over. It hurt my heart so much. My mom had to actually lift me up off the street.
I loved him and I would wait. As the moonlight shined across my ring I knew that my life with him was only beginning. He was my only exception.
"And up until now I have sworn to myself that I'm content with loneliness because none of it was ever worth the risk, well you are, the only exception, you are the only exception…"