Showered With Love II

Unbeknownst to the partygoers, the congregation was being watched. Jet surveyed the room through a set of peepholes in the secret priest hole. (Aang and Sokka both knew what a priest hole was…Jet just sniggered in his usually dirty way.) He shifted his weight, and accidentally stepped on Aang's toes. The Avatar yelped, and Sokka slapped a hand over his mouth.

"Shh! Do you want us to get girl-beaten?"

"Sorry," Aang whispered back. "But…why weren't we invited to the party? I'm the Avatar."

(That was his non-sequitorial excuse for everything these days. "But I'm the Avatar" was the phrase that directly followed "No, I do not want to eat your fruit pies," "No, you cannot sleep here tonight," and "No, I do not want to see what Momo can do with your staff.")

"This is one of those top-secret girl things," Jet explained, watching the crowd of milling women and salivating just a little at all the pretty things clustered together like pastries in a bakery window. "Y'know when girls go to the bathroom together? Or they have 'girls' nights out'? Well, 'Ladies Only' is code for 'Half-naked Pillow Fight.'"

Aang's eyes glowed. "Really? I love pillow fights!"

"There's Suki!" Sokka exclaimed. Since the royal wedding, they'd had a reconciliation, but when the rumors of his involvement with Azula started circulating, he hadn't heard from the Kyoshian at all. She hadn't even come to the peace—er, war summit.

He had to talk to her. Clear things up.

But it was going to be a long wait.

The women ate dainty little sandwiches and drank fruity punch and expensive tea. They reminisced and complained about their boyfriends and husbands, or lack thereof. They traded secrets and gossip. And in some cases, they picked their toes.

"Who knew this could be so much fun!" a barefoot Ty Lee exclaimed as Toph demonstrated the sweet picking technique to a group gathered around her.

"Stick with me, Pinky, and I can show you all kinds of fancy footwork!"

Toph had obviously been spending waaaaay too much time with Bumi.

In the centre of the room sat the two expectant mothers, regal in all their expectant glory. Despite being a little more advanced in her pregnancy, Azula was about the same size as Katara, which made everyone flutter about the possibility of twins for the Fire Lord.

"Good gods, I hope not," Katara said a little nervously. "I mean, I'd love to have more children, but twins!"

"It's that whole fire-water thing," Gran-Gran whispered to the guests in explanation. "She's a little tired of that whole duality concept. And before anyone even asks, the baby's not going to have two different-colored eyes and be able to bend both elements—those are all just Fadmon lies!"

Azula received more hugs in that one afternoon than she had in her whole lifetime. It was a little strange at first to be embraced so warmly by so many people she barely knew, and smiled at by perfect strangers who didn't tremble with fear. She felt surprisingly pleased by this…and a little confused.

How could having a baby change everyone's perceptions of her so radically? Was motherhood supposed to soften her like this? Who was she if she wasn't Princess Azula of the Fire Nation, former conqueror of Ba Seng Se and sister to the Fire Lord? Would she just be "Mom" for the rest of her life? The thoughts swirled endlessly through her mind, distracting her from her other worries momentarily. Seeing so many women who were mothers, daughters, grandmothers, aunts…it was a little overwhelming to grasp the idea that she was to be a part of a family now; that, with the birth of her child, she'd be taking her place at the head of her own little kingdom of singularly devoted subjects who weren't capable of mayhem and destruction.

Not that the Dai Li wouldn't mind swaddling themselves in diapers and cooing cutely in her bed to please her. They were just that loyal…and sick.

Kisu, meanwhile, was enjoying a rare moment out of the princess's arms, though he'd been confined to a basket at her feet and tethered by a short, pink leather leash. Out of spite, he swiped at every woman's ankles, and only stopped when Lo and Li, who'd come all the way from their retirement home on Ember Island, picked him up by the scruff and peered at him with rheumy eyes.

"Avatar Aang, when did you get so small?" Lo (or maybe Li) asked.

"And hairy?" Li (or maybe Lo) added.

Azula explained gently, "Um...that's my cat."

"Silly girl, the Avatar's not a cat," Li/Lo told her as if she were daft.

"'Zula, you really should give him more respect." Lo/Li nodded her sage agreement. They bowed before the cat. "Forgive her, Avatar, she was raised by her father." They said the word as though it were a taboo. Considering they'd been utterly loyal to Ozai until Zuko came to power, Azula thought this an odd comment. It just added one more anxiety to her long list of things to keep her up at night.

When the princess and Fire Lady started opening gifts, Jet sat up. "Guys, this is it."

"It, what?" Aang asked, eager, but not sure why.

"They always give out lingerie and dirty little sex toys at these parties," Jet said, eyes alight with perverted fire. "Then they start trying each other's clothes on and comparing breast sizes. It all goes south from there."

"Exactly how many baby showers have you been to?" Sokka asked. His focus was on Suki—he wasn't interested in Jet's preoccupation with boobs.

Okay, maybe a little.

"Just this one," the Freedom Fighter replied easily. "But everyone knows that's what happens."

The first packages were opened to a chorus of oohs and aahs as the mothers held out tiny little swaddling clothes. More paper and ribbons were torn away, and the pile of cute onesies, footies and other ridiculously adorable miniature clothing gathered rapidly around the royals.

Larger items Jet couldn't identify began massing around them. Being the smartest of the bunch, Sokka identified the confusing panorama of things a man would never think of buying.

"Bathtub… breastfeeding pillow… diapers… crib toys… bouncer… swing… bassinet… more toys… sling… more clothes… stroller… blankets… crib sheets…" He squinted at the latest gift. "I think that's a pair of tongs for carrying dirty diapers away…" He shook his head. "Weird."

"What the hell?" Jet cried indignantly. "Where are the see-through nighties? Where are the feathers and chains and leather whips?"

Aang grimaced his sympathy. "Azula's been rough on you since Haru left, hasn't she?"

Jet grumbled. "Hasn't touched me in weeks."

"Me neither…not that I want her to!" Aang said quickly, eyes darting to where Toph sat, chewing her big toenail.

Sokka said nothing, and the two others waited.

"Well?"

"Well, what?"

"Oh, c'mon, Sokka. This silent act is getting old. We all know you've been with the princess, no matter how much you deny it."

"I haven't!" the Water Tribe warrior exclaimed. "Why does everyone think I have?"

"Hmm, well, let me see…." Jet grabbed him by the collar and tore the flaps of his shirt down to his waist, exposing a very clear bite mark and the telltale stripes of burns left by Azula's scorching fingers raking down his chest. Jet grabbed his own collar and pulled his shirt up over his head, showing Sokka identical marks.

Aang looked on in horror, a hand going up to his own secret love-marks.

Jet smirked. "Look familiar?" His fingertips danced mockingly over the Water Tribe warrior's skin, flicking a scarred nipple and making Sokka cry out.

He slapped Jet's hands away, willing his goose bumps to dissipate, but the Freedom Fighter grabbed his wrists and yanked them upwards, drawing them far too close together. As it was, there wasn't a lot of space in the priest hole to tussle, and Aang was getting uncomfortably jostled…and aroused. "It's not what you think!" Sokka hissed, trying to remind them all where they were hiding, but the time to be quiet was gone.

"Fee, fi, foh, fom…" Toph's strident voice on the other side of the wall chilled them to the bone. "I smell the blood of three peeping toms…"

Suddenly, the wall enclosing the secret room they'd been watching the shower from disappeared into the ground, revealing two shirtless boys grappling at each other and the Avatar, who stood rigidly by.

Ursa's lips spread into a wide smile as she gazed appreciatively at Sokka's bared form. "Well, well, well…"

About a dozen fans snapped open and began a gale-force fanning session amongst the tinkling titters of the female guests.

"Woo hoo! Entertainment!" Lo and Li cackled, and started throwing coppers at the boys' feet. "Break out the booze!"

"Oh, Sokka." Gran-Gran shook her head despondently. "Why can't you hook up with a nice boy for once?"