Hard Landing

The flight from the Fire Nation capital to Kyoshi lasted all of four hours—plenty of time for a nap, a meal and a game of paisho. The wind—and the Avatar who controlled it—ushered them along as the zeppelin fleet cruised east. No one expected a fierce battle…but no one was sure what to expect, either.

"Just be prepared when we storm the Fadmon headquarters," Azula told the platoon leaders confidently. Kisu, kitted out in an adorable suit of mesh armor, glowered fiercely at the troops from his mistress's shoulder, daring them to say something about the morningstar pompom hanging from his tail. "My sources tell me they're located in the main village in the old dojo, but there's no telling what will be between us and them."

"Should we be expecting any interference from the Kyoshi warriors?" Hakoda asked. He'd seen those girls in action, and didn't look forward to sparring with them.

"No. Oyagi tried to get them to defend their home, but they're not interested, not after the lies Fadmon printed about them." Azula laid out an older issue of the leaflet. The front page read, "SCANDAL! What happens in the dojo STAYS in the dojo!" and it featured a titillating drawing of the warriors frolicking around in their skivvies, kissing each other and torturing someone who looked a lot like Ty Lee.

("That is so wrong," Ty Lee had complained of the picture. "My boobs are way perkier than that!")

"This should be a piece of cake," Azula went on in a mild tone, but her eyes sparked with steely calculation. "Still, we can't underestimate our foe. Make sure the troops are prepared for anything. Ambush, bombs, traps…resistance of any kind must be snuffed out. We must emerge as the undisputed champions in this. Nothing but total annihilation will do!"

Zuko let his sister's diabolical charisma wash over him…but he'd become used to its inexorable pull over the years, so wasn't as fired up as the rest of the gathering. He'd always envied her ability to draw energy from her audience, processing the mild enthusiasm and turning it into fiery conviction. The princess was like that invention the Mechanist had gifted to Katara and Zuko for their wedding—the "vacuum cleaner."

What was it Katara had said about his sister? Ah, yes—"Azula's personality is just like a vacuum cleaner—it sucks and blows."

Just to make sure everyone understood who was in charge, he stepped up as soon as Azula had finished speaking. The troops and their officers were rapt.

"This is the first strike against an enemy that could be lurking anywhere," he boomed. "When we take Kyoshi and liberate its inhabitants of Fadmon's oppression, we'll be able to strike out at all their distributors and those who side with our opponents. We must make it clear to the world: either you are with us, or you are with the enemy."

Everyone nodded and murmured their assent and their grave understanding.

A klaxon rang, indicating their arrival.

"We're approaching Kyoshi Island now," Fire Lord Zuko declared unnecessarily. "Everyone prepare for final descent. It's time we cleaned the mouths of these rumormongers!"

A cheer arose and the troops scattered in all directions to man their stations. The air hummed with excitement, with keen, steely verve…with bloodlust.

The ultimate battle for truth and justice was about to begin.

Meanwhile, back at the Fire Nation palace, regret mixed with boredom and impatience hung in the air like a stubborn fart.

Toph half sighed, half grunted. "It's too quiet."

Katara poured the little Earthbender's tea and smiled. "Maybe you should've gone with the fleet. Zuko could've used you at the front line." Of course, the Fire Lady was anxious for her husband, too. But the unspoken consensus seemed to be he'd be back in time for dinner. No one expected this fight against Fadmon to last longer than a few hours…

No one, of course, except Toph, who, despite being blind, could see more clearly than most of her myopic colleagues.

"Are you kidding me?" she exclaimed, scowling deeply. "I wouldn't face Fadmon in a million years." She shuddered. "Just thinking about all those fangirls…"

The Fire Lady faltered. "Wh-what are you talking about?"

"Fangirls. You know, those crazed psychos that were following Zuko around for gods know how long?"

A cold feeling spread through her stomach. Her baby tumbled restlessly. "What about them?"

"Huh. I thought you knew. There's a whole army of them waiting for the attack on Kyoshi." Toph picked her nose nonchalantly. "Fadmon has an enormous, far-reaching audience you know." She snorted at the beat of incredulous silence. "What? Did you really think they'd let their beloved tabloid go down in flames?"

In the loading bay where the troops had gathered, Jet stood at the front lines by the bay doors, prepared to show Azula how great a leader he was, how brave he could be. It just wouldn't do to hover in the back somewhere, where no one could see his glorious courage as they smashed the helpless Fadmon empire into itty-bitty pieces.

"Just like old times, eh, Smellerbee?" he nudged his old colleague. The Freedom Fighters had all reunited for this event—easy targets were their specialty, after all.

Smellerbee just glowered at him. "You're lucky Longshot talked me into this," she grumbled. "I was very happy serving tea in Ba Seng Se, you know. I didn't have to get back into the mercenary business. I could have had a nice, quiet, happy life, but then you—"

"Uh, guys..." Pipsqueak squinted his piggy little eyes and stared hard at the island through the view hole in the hull. "What…what is that?"

Jet glanced over the behemoth's shoulder. "It's just the trees, Pipsqueak. They can't hurt you."

"No. No, those aren't trees," The Duke chimed in. "Look at the way they're moving."

Indeed, the forest seemed to be rippling with movement, not from the wind, but with hyper-frentic energy that seemed to grow the closer they got.

Others had gathered at the various view ports now, staring down at the mysterious movement on Kyoshi. Nerves twinged. The excitement dimmed, slowly turned into a cold dread that settled like lead in everyone's stomachs.

"Shh-shh-shh. Everyone. Listen." Smellerbee made everyone hush. A prolonged high-pitched whine sliced through the air.

"What is that?" Pipsqueak whispered fearfully.

"It's…" Jet's eyes widened. A cold shiver trickled down his spine and raised the hairs on his neck.

He knew that noise. It had driven him to the brink of insanity a few times in his life. And it heralded a long and difficult battle ahead.

"It's fangirls…" His tone vibrated with a tremor. "And they're squeeing."

Katara's tea cup tumbled to the ground, the amber liquid splashing all over the floor. She wobbled to her feet. "You knew about the fangirls and didn't tell anyone?" Shock, fear, dread—none of those words were strong enough to express her state.

Toph only shrugged. "Azula ought to know. She was the one who summoned them to the island."

The Waterbender gasped, staggering backwards. "Why?" she cried. "Why would she do that?"

Toph shrugged again. "For kicks?"

Rampant fear coursed through the Fire Lady's veins like ice, clogging her ability to think, to move. "I—I have to warn Zuko!" Katara started out the room in a daze, but as she headed for the door, she nearly crashed into a panicked-looking Sokka.

"Sokka! We have to—"

"Ozai…" he gasped, gripping his sister by the arms. The acrid smell of smoke rose off him. "Brandy…Firebending…he's—"

A telltale whoosh and crackle made Katara instinctively duck as a jet of hot flame struck the door frame, leaving a blackened patch of soot where her head had been. A heatwave scorched her back and made her stumble back just as another lance of fire whipped out.

"Ozai's puked up his Firebending suppressant!" Sokka yelled as he urged the two out of the room. "He can bend again! And he's going to kill us all!"