Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Lin

Zongzi: a traditional Chinese dish made of glutinous rice stuffed with different fillings and wrapped in bamboo or reed leaves. They are cooked by steaming or boiling.

(Source: Wikipedia)

"Councilman Aang," she cut him off before he could correct her in that good-natured way he did, "I'm sorry—former Councilman Aang, is there any reason why you're here in my office this morning?"

"I just stopped by to see you Li—Chief Duty Beifong. To see how you were doing after—"

Less than a minute at her door and he was already giving himself away. "—after?"

"After the day you had yesterday." He pointed to the paper sitting on her desk, her face on the front page and the story about the counterfeit yuan operation she had busted yesterday. Five months of hard work finally put to rest. She should have been sleeping, deserved to sleep for days, but with the letter she had gotten in the mail, it was better that she came in. It was better to already be awake than be pulled out of slumber at home. They were still looking for stragglers.

After all, she had known that the ex-councilman (it was always titles and diplomacy whenever someone stepped into her office—no exceptions, especially not for her mother's old friends) would probably come by today, to tell some story about something or other, but in actuality trying to probe her to see how she was feeling.

She opened the door and let him in first. She followed, sat down in her chair, and grabbed at the bag and carton of coffee he had set down for her—black with sugar like how she liked it. She opened the bag. Zongzi, the kind with mushrooms and egg yolks, her favorite exception to the non-vegetarian diet she had. Somebody on that island still remembered her favorite breakfast. "You don't have to tell a half-lie about why you're here Aa...Avatar Aang. I received my mail yesterday, read it, and haven't really thought about it since then."

She really hadn't because it didn't matter.

It really didn't.

She didn't care. She really really didn't care.

She wasn't the kind of woman—the kind of person, period—to spend the night sitting around in her apartment, eating cartons of ice cream, and being emotional about the past.

It was a relationship that had ended long ago; it wasn't something to cry about, even now. Her energy was better spent doing and thinking about something else. It had always been whenever she and...feelings about Tenzin were concerned.

She watched him opening his own bag and lift out a steamed bun. "Well, that's good."

"I know; it beats us asking each other roundabout questions."

Like, When exactly?

When exactly two years ago had Tenzin decided that Pema was the girl for him? She remembered that they had studied together...that Tenzin had agreed to teach Pema more about Airbending culture because she seemed "genuinely interested". When exactly during all those talks about Airbending clothing and arrow tattoos and the vegetarian diet had him liking her become an idea? A thing to try? How exactly had those conversations changed into those of romance? What—had Pema asked questions about the way Airbending children were raised and Tenzin, staunchly-devout and abstinent Tenzin, had told her, put the moves on her?

Did Tenzin even have moves?

She scoffed, doubting it since she had been the one to ask him on a date the first time they were together.

But...maybe he did if her mail was anything to consider.

Would've been great to have seen them back when they had been together. At any of the given times from adolescence to adulthood when they had been together—the first time, the second time, the fifth time.

"...I'm not going to arrest her if that's why you're here."

Of course she wouldn't. Things were going well for her now. There had been talk of her possibly becoming chief at year's end, and with the bust yesterday, there was no doubt in her mind it was coming true. She had finally achieved what she had set out to do and had made no compromises in getting what she had wanted, just adjustments.

Like after the first breakup, when she had wanted to take their relationship further, to make it more physical, and he wanted abstinence as per his culture. She had broke up with him and found another guy happy to give her what she had been ready for. And when she had decided that that guy wasn't for her anymore, she had gone back to Tenzin.

And after the third time, when he had wanted her back and he had agreed to them bringing up the "M" word later, when the idea didn't make her feel...weird...

And the fourth time when she had gotten stressed about being looked over for chief—murmurs from competition and questions about if she was the right person for the job and debates about how much it had to do with her being good and her mother—and told him that all his talks about marriage and kids weren't helping. They just weren't helping. She couldn't think about being all domesticated because it wasn't her, she couldn't do it, and if he had a problem with the answer she was finally giving him, he could leave.

And the fifth time when, in the middle of them having a screaming match, he had finally, calmly, decided to end things.

"I'm saying this because I can't lie to you about this, especially when I think it's best. Every time we get back together, we just end up fighting. And it's the same conversations over and over again. We want different things in life...Lin, maybe it's better if we just let this go. I'm sorry."

She had pressed her fingers on her scar, the gashes that had long since keloid and Tenzin's attendance on her condition for months and months on end being the reason why they had gotten back together the third time. But what was the point in going back in time when they were breaking up and this wouldn't be a funny story they would talk about when they were older?

If he could be calm about things, she could be calm about them too. "...Fine. Get out."

She had achieved everything she had wanted, and in six months, she would finally have something to show for it.

"I'm sure that Tenzin will be happy to hear that."

And finally, after two years and six months from the day she had lost her mind, yelling at Kya for keeping the secret of her ex's new relationship from her and heading over to Air Temple Island to make an arrest, Tenzin was beginning to get what he had wanted.

"You are cordially invited to witness the marriage of Councilman Tenzin..."

Marriage...to Pema. That shy girl he had begun teaching about Airbending culture, the bookworm. The one she, Lin, had ignored. The one that was ten years younger than Tenzin. The one that had somehow in the time she and Tenzin had separated for the last time, had become...straightforward...somehow, over her social awkwardness—flowers in her hair; rosy cheeked; furrowed brow at her appearance outside the women's quarters on the island. The one that Tenzin had deigned to place himself in front of to shield from her, the woman he had left behind, and her fury, her fists and threats.

"...Can I ask you a question?"

He smiled, the almost sixty-six years he showed almost melting away in light of his grin like they always did. "Of course."

"I know you didn't like the way Tenzin and Pema had gotten together."

"...And how did you find out that nugget of information?" He bit into his third steamed bun.

"Kya. She really has a small tolerance for pain when I'm involved." He chuckled, knowing it to be true and she allowed for the moment of mirth to pass. "...Did you think that we would get back together, even...after the last time we broke up?" The question sat on her tongue last night and early this morning.

"Did you think that that was going to happen?"

"Maybe. It wouldn't have been the first time we would've after a fight like that one."

"I don't understand why you even want me around. Why do you need me? You're already in a relationship with your work!"

"Oh yeah—that's a real good argument coming from you, Councilman Tenzin of the Air Nation, the hardest working politician in office. It's like hearing the pot actually call the kettle black."

"Yes. Maybe it is. But the difference between me and you is that I won't want to be in a relationship with my work my whole life!...I wouldn't want to do this forever. But what you do, you're ready to do this for the rest of your life if you can..."

"That is true. But would it have happened after that last time?"

...She couldn't answer that, especially now.

"And would it have been good if it had?"

...No. No it wouldn't have, especially not now. Because now that she had what she wanted, she knew if she had had it anytime earlier, she would have wanted to keep it, to do more because she could. More crazy hours; more investigations leading to money and drug and prostitute busts; dinners being a bowl of dried noodles with salty powder, soy sauce, and hot sauce packets; more protocol; celebrations being a simple bottle of beer with co-workers or a six-pack that she could empty by herself at home; more sleeping for only a few hours at her desk or in her bed; more pushing back Tenzin's wants and needs and at times, pushing back some of her own selfish needs as a person, as a woman.

She paused in unwrapping the last of her zongzi, realizing that all of it—Tenzin's accusations of her being more in love with her work was true. For now, at thirty-three, she was happy and in love with what she was doing and at this point, she probably always would be. Until those moments passed in her head when she would want someone to bring something different to her life—not romance...just a separation when her first love got to be too much, someone who knew what she was about and could handle that.

And now probably the only person who could bring that to her was getting married to the woman who cared more about his specific needs and could fulfill them.

That thought was really...sad. Almost sad enough to cry about.

The Airbender's question still hung in the air.

"...I guess we'll never know."

The Announcement

I wanted to do a Lin ficlet that didn't involve her hating Tenzin or her and bending. So, in my quest not to do that, I hit the borderline between that: Tenzin's wedding announcement and her love for her job. It was hard to make Lin emotional, so I quit after awhile (hahaha!) but I think it works.