Chapter 11:
Jonny laid on his bed, curled in a ball, and all alone. He hated losing period. But losing to the Stars at home was a whole different thing.
With Sidney coming out, and Jonny following not long after, they were entitled the pioneers of the gay community. (Obviously Sid never knew. that because he doesn't read Deadspin on a daily basis like Jonny does).
Then the younger Canadian got a concussion due to some very homophobic shit. Nash was slapped with a five million dollar fine and suspended for the rest of the regular season and the post season.
While some said it was a bit to much for what he did. Most said it was justification for such acts. Whether gay or straight it was very innapropriate and could've ended such a young and talented man's career before he reached his full potential.
A few people said it was all bullshit. That he should've been arrested or suspended indefinitely. (Or both). That the punishment he got was nowhere near equal to what he did to Sidney.
Those people left Sid's legacy and everything he stood for riding on Jonny's shoulders. And he failed. He failed when it mattered the most.
Jonny left the locker room without talking to anyone. Even Kaner. He highly doubt that his fuck buddy would want to deal with him right now anyways.
When him and Patrick has first .. slept together. Jonny had assumed that (after talking out their feelings for each other) they were dating.
Then one night in Minnesota, Jonny told Patrick that he loved him. And Kaner flipped shit.
He yelled at Jonny, telling him that they were only fucking each other. That whatever 'relationship' he thought they had was just based on how good Jonny was to fuck.
Which that led to Toews slapping Kaner in the face before spending the night crying in his hotel bedroom.
Him and Patrick haven't talked much since that happened last week. And all the seperation was killing him. He loves Patrick, but he'd pretend he didn't if it meant being with him again.
A loud knock echos through his empty house. He's startled because no one would dare bother him, especially not this late in the night.
With a heavy heart, he trudges down the stairs and to the door. He swings it open and is confronted by the face of his ex-lover.
"What the hell do you want?" Jonny scowls.
Patrick looks fucked up. His eyes a little pink and sad. Hair pointing in different directions. The clothes he's wearing. if look wrinkled, like he threw them on in a rush. His bottom lip is red and swollen.
To Jonny, he looks perfect.
"I .. I came here to apologize." Kaner says.
Jonny crosses his arms in front of his chest and raises an eyebrow.
"Look," Patrick begins, "I shouldn't of freaked out on you like that. You told me how you felt and I wasn't prepared for that. I also wasn't prepared for .. me .. to feel the same."
"Patrick-"
Kaner shakes his head, "Jonathan, I love you. I realize that now. And if .. if .. you don't want to be with me, for real this time, I understand."
Jonny's eyes start to water, so he pulls Kaner inside. "I love you so much."
Toews presses Patrick against the wall, devouring his mouth slowly, taking his time.
They stood there, memorizing every inch of each other's mouth until they had to breath. Even after they broke, they just stared into the other's eyes.
"So," Kaner says, "partners for life?"
Jonny grins out of pure happiness, "Or until Chicago allows us to get married."
Patrick giggles, "I'm sure they will when I come out."
They stand there for a moment. Giggling for no real reason while refilling their lungs with oxygen.
The moment is so perfect. Because they're perfect for each other, and they'll never forget that.
...
Evgeni's shoulders slump in defeat. They just lost the series against the Caps 4-3. It's a heart breaking loss. He knows he's disappointed, the whole team is.
The Capitals are mostly on cloud nine. They're going to be playing against the Stars for the Cup. Well, Nick is upset. He wanted Geno to play in for the trophy almost as much as he wanted it for himself.
Despite all this, no one looks more depressed than Alex.
Sure, he wants his boyfriend's team to play in for the Cup. Evgeni is slightly happy because his is. Nevertheless, Alex is probably going to win the Stanley mother fucking Cup! He should be running rampade and celebrating like a lunatic.
During the handshakes, he mutters his apologizes toward each individual Penguin, even pulling Evgeni in for a one arm hug.
"So sorry Zhenya, for everything," he had whispered before pulling away.
It made Evgeni realize how much he missed his awkward and cocky best friend. And that this petty fight over Sidney wasn't worth losing the greatest human being to ever walk on the Earth.
Evgeni stalls in the locker room. Taking his time showering and changing before forcing himself to leave.
To be completely honest, they weren't playing their best tonight. A critic on Deadspin had posted an article claiming that the Penguins were better off without Sidney. Just look at all the progress they've made, and no one has yet to even find the new Lemieux at any of their practices, or even their games. Malkin was doing such a good job as captain, they don't need Sidney.
In spirit of their real captain, they sort of .. slacked off. In the first quarter, it was a little obvious what they were doing. By the end of the second, it was very clear to the whole team that they wanted to lose for Sidney. Not even Dan yelled at them for it, which was surprising on all levels.
In the third, it was a mad rush to prevent the Caps from scoring, it worked. But the game still ended one to none.
Evgeni really didn't want to go back to the hotel. He didn't want to deal with anyone, especially the media.
No, he wants his boyfriend. So he goes to his house.
Listening to his GPS's very precise instructions, he pulls into Nick's driveway to find the lights already on.
Evgeni barely makes it to the front door before Nick pulls him inside, crashing their lips together and forcing the Russian up against the door.
He likes being dominated, loved it when Bäckström had forced him to do whatever it is he wanted Evgeni to do.
He's also into those deep, dark sexual fantasies. And so is Nick.
Sure, he's not Sidney. But he's a close second.
...
James took Paul in his arms, breathing in the scent of his older lover's cologne. He doesn't really understand what the problem is. They've lost before. Hell, they've gone to the playoffs every year since they adopted Sid and haven't gone to the Stanley Cup game once. It stings, but it's not a new experience.
And not one that would make Paulie act like this.
"Babe," James whispers, "what's wrong?"
Paul sniffles, leaning back to look up at Nealer, "I just .. I .. I don't want to talk about it." He looks down at their feet, taking a step back and turning from the Canadian to unlock his hotel room door and step inside.
James follows him inside, trying hard not to slam the door behind him, "Paul, we need to talk about this."
Paulie turns around looking him in the eye, "What do you want me to say? Hell .. Why do you even care?"
James rolls his eyes, "As your boyfriend it's my responsibility to care-"
Paul's eyes go wide, "B-boyfriend?"
"Uh yeah," James returns, "What else are we calling this?"
Martin stares at him dumbfound, then his face splits into a large grin.
Paulie cups James's face, bringing him down that short inch for a passionate kiss. No longer than sex craving make out they've shared before. One. that feels so much better, leaving them wanting more but completely satisfied with what they have.
James never does actually finds out what's bothering his lover. Just lets himself be dragged to one of the double beds and laid down without much force.
They cuddled as close as possible while watching The Big Bang Theory. Nealer has absolutely no idea what's going on, but Paulie seems invested in it, and that's all that really matters.
During one commercial, Paulie turns so they can see each other's faces.
"You know, we're gonna have to thank Sid big time for ... all of this." Paulie points out.
The day after Sid came out, Paulie had let it slip that he's gay too while being totally hammered and falling over James (who was equally as drunk). One thing led to another, and they just continued their little routine (while being sober and only after wins). Never deciding to really talk about it. Just spend so much time together that they know every little quirk they have and every detail about each other's lives.
"Yeah, we'll give him a blow job the next time we see him." James responds.
Paul makes that oh so adorable giggle every time someone talks about something sexual, "Then Ovie would probably end up punching you in the face."
"Why would he just punch me?" James asks.
Martin rolls his eyes, "Come on, do you think anyone could punch -this- face?"
James smiles, "Well I would punch them for even thinking of such an act."
Paul giggles again. So James presses their lips together, close mouth and soft. The American rests a hand on James's chest. The moment is so perfect, nothing could ruin it.
Well, except for Paulie's roommate walking in.
"Paul-ie! Sup man! I brought-" Flower freezes a couple feet in front of the bed, a six pack of beer in his right hand, "What the fucking hell?"
James's blood runs cold and his face pales, "Marc .. Marc this is um-"
Flower puts up a hand, "Whoa man. Calm your nips." The goalie grins and cocks head to the side, "Why didn't you guys tell us? I'm sure Sid would be more than pleased to know."
The look Paulie and James share is one that tells Flower he already does know.
Flower rolls his eyes, "Lazy, you're rooming with Vitale, right? I'll just go cramp his style then."
"Just um .. uh .. don't tell them." James. says in a rush, Paulie pokes him in the stomach, "Well we're going to .. uh .. at the start of the regular season .. So Sid will be there."
Flower flicks James in the ear before heading out the door, mumbling to himself in French.
Paulie looks up at him through squinted eyes, handing reaching in James's jeans and boxers to grab his limp dick way to roughly.
"You are a -horrible- boyfriend." Paul says, jacking him off.
James whimpers once, morphing into a moan that's muffled by the impact of the American's lips on his.
So he lied, this is the perfect moment that can't be ruined.
(Unless Flower walks in again .. then there would be some problems)
Sidney watched the Stanley Cup series in his special box when they played in Washington, or sitting on Alex's couch back in his enormous, empty mansion.
They started out great. The Caps whipped Dallas the first three games, the series starting three to none. Just one more game.
Something must have gone horribly wrong during the off day between game three and game four. Because the Stars raped them, five nothing.
Alex was on the road so he compromised to Skyping Sidney, looking very blank as he does.
"Baby, what's wrong?" Sidney asks.
Alex just shakes his head, "Nothing."
Sid rolls his eyes at the lack of emotion in his voice. "You know I hate it when you lie to me."
The corner of Alex's mouth turn down, the only show of life he's given in the past ten minutes, "Why you call me liar when I not?"
"Because it's pretty obvious that something is bothering you, and I just want to know what's wrong." Sidney says.
Alex bites his lip, eyes flicking to something off in the distance before resting on Sid again, "I love you."
Sid blushes, "I love you too sweety."
The corners of Alex's mouth turns up, the only emotion he's shown in the past five minutes. "Glad to know what not change now I loser."
"What? You're not a loser." Sid says.
Alex rolls his eyes, "I won every game since you move in. Now I lost, make me loser."
Sidney really wants to stroke his face, "We all lose games. It's not going to change my opinion on you, ever."
Alex nods, "Want to spend time with you always."
"I know," Sidney agrees, "It's really gonna suck next season when I start to play again."
Alex thinks this over for a minute, "Wish I could play with you."
Sidney has a totally outrageous thought pop into his brain, "That would be so amazing if we play for the same team."
"What would you do?" Alex asks.
"What, if you got traded to Pittsburgh?" Sidney asks for clarification. He laughs a little as Alex nods. "Well, considering that is highly unlikely and completely Impossible. That would be like heaven on Earth, for both our game and our personal lives."
Alex grins, "Impossible?"
"The Caps would never release you, let alone trade you to us." Sid points out.
Still, Alex looks optimistic. "Just have to wait until contract is up then."
"Yeah, sure. That's not for another couple years, right?" Sid asks.
Alex smirks, "Right."
The Caps end up losing the next three games in a row. Crowning the Dallas Stars as the new Stanley Cup champions.
Alex looks upset as he walks in the mansion. Luggage occupying both of his hands that Sidney takes instantly into the bedroom and places them on the floor beside before going back downstairs.
Sid comes back into the living room to find Alex on the couch playing on his phone. He hasn't seen the Russian since they played game five in D.C., but even then they really talk much.
Now apparently isn't any different. So Sid takes a seat on the other end of couch, curls into a ball with a notebook, and busies himself with making a list of what needs to be done around the house.
His biggest concern is the lack of furnishing that Alex has. The mansion has five bedrooms (a master and four guests) that contain only a king size bed and an empty closet.
So he focuses on making those a more homey. Then decides that they should probably change on of those to a nursery. Which leads him to adding strollers, bibs, cribs, and diapers to the list. After thinking it over he decides to underline the word diapers.
"What do we need those for?" Alex asks from where he had moved closer to Sid. (Wow, he must be like a stealthy ninja because he never felt the couch move.)
"For our kids." Sidney replies.
Ovie's eyes widden a little, "Don't know how that possible. Last time I check you no have vagina. Unless I need check again."
Sid rolls his eyes, "There's this thing called adoption, you know."
"Only twenty-five Sid. No need to think about kids now." Alex points out.
Sidney grabs his hand, "I just like to be prepared."
Ovie's lips brush on Sid's forehead, trace of a smile on his lips.
...
Alex looks down at Sid, the younger man holding his hand firmly. Hearing him talk about children sent a wave of fear through his chest.
It's not like he can say he wouldn't love to have a little Ovechkin and Lemieux playing shinny with make shift hockey sticks while wearing their dad's jerseys in the smallest size they can make. That would be a lie. He would love nothing more than to see the adoring look in Sidney's gorgeous hazel eyes as he gazes down at the new born in his arms and hums a sweet lullaby.
Adoption is dangerous. Even after they retire and move to .. somewhere safe and secluded. It's not like Alex could just come out. He's from -Russia- for fuck's sake. They've all but outlawed homosexuality (though they probably will pretty soon). Just imagine what his country would do to him, how bad the rejection would burn.
Okay, so maybe Alex is being a -little- bit of a hypocrite. He was unintentionally trying to get outed (he wasn't trying! honestly. it all just sort of .. happened. plus he's impulsive and does .. stuff.).
Adopting children would be a whole different story though. There are many ways that you could cover up a leaked picture or a story on Deadspin, but you can't cover up adoption papers. Not to mention that a person has to come evaluate your house, lifestyle, and whatever else is necesarry to be a sufficient parent.
Not that Alex wouldn't risk going through all of that for Sidney, the man he loves, because he would. He just doesn't want to put his parents, his family, Zhenya, or any of his closest friends through all of that. That wouldn't be fair just for him to be happy.
Sid's fingers trail down Alex's chest, "Why are staring at me like that?"
Alex smiles, "Because you beautiful."
Sidney blushes brightly. Closing the space between them, hand wrapped around Alex's neck.
All he can do is pull the younger man closer and give him what he wants. That's all he can really do for the time being, until things work itself out and he can give him the world.
Maybe the rest of his life will do.
The pull up Netflix on Alex's PlayStation, putting on a random movie that Sidney picks because it has Denzel Washington in it (who is literally his favorite actor). The Canadian sits in Alex's lap, heading laying in the crook of his neck while he watches the screen with no interest. Alex just plays with his hair and skin, feeling everything that wouldn't be distractive or suggestive in any way, while taking in his scent. Memorizing it so that he'd have something to hold onto if their fate forced them into different directions, even if for a short period of time.
They both sort of slip into unconsciousness, fading in and out as the warmth of their bodies lul each other.
Since they are both hockey players, that means they're always hungry. Neither of them are exactly chefs, but they manage to get by.
Even as Sidney makes them a grilled cheese sandwhich that would bring his mother to his knees from joy and Alex makes a pathetic salad, they always end up touching. Whether it's a simple brush or a lingering hold, the heat from Sid's touch soothes him and the cold flesh underneath Alex's fingers as he brushed along the Canadian's arm sends a thrill of pure exuberance through him. And it's the best thing he could've asked for.
He'll be damned if anyone would try and take away this moment.
.
Notes:
The point of this chapter was to lengthen this out because I feel like I'm moving to quickly and I want to at least get close a hundred thousand words (which is unlikely). Also I felt really lovey dovey today and I had to write this. I felt like I wasn't giving my extra pairings enough spotlight to focus on their relationship. So there. Hope you like it and I didn't scare you to much