38
"So." PJ said settling himself comfortably on the couch, mug of coffee in one hand, the other arm draped across the back of the couch all ready for Maggie to come and sit beside him.
Maggie, however, had other ideas. She'd sat down at the other end of the couch, turning to face him, her back against the arm of the couch and legs crossed underneath her. At PJ's questioning look she smiled softly.
"If I sit next to you, we'll never talk. Not properly. I just want to hold you when I sit that close to you, and you know it," she said.
"I can't help it if I'm irresistible can I?" PJ grinned, before reaching over to gently lace his fingers with Maggie's. "I know what you mean though. If we're going to do this, we need a bit of space between us."
"If?" Maggie asked.
"I didn't mean it like that, we do have to talk about all of this, and we need to do it sooner rather than later. I just meant that – well…" PJ's voice tapered off and he suddenly found their interlocked hands very interesting. Maggie waited silently; she'd always found that, given time, PJ would speak his mind.
"Mags, I love you. I've always loved you, and I always will. When I thought – when you died, I nearly went with you. Nothing seemed to matter without you, and I was that close to ending it all. And now – now …." He swallowed deeply, his throat suddenly dry.
"PJ, you won't lose me. I love you too, and I can't lose you again. I won't lose you again," she said firmly. "Yes we've got a lot to talk about, a lot to catch up on, but you and me, PJ, we're us again. We're us, and as far as I'm concerned I'm not going to let that go."
PJ leaned over and placed a butterfly light kiss on Maggie's lips, before resting his forehead against hers. "Me either" he whispered, before leaning back again. "So."
Maggie smiled. "I do believe that was where we came in, Detective Hasham"
"So it was Doyley, so it was. Come on then, talk to me. What the hell happened? What do you know, and what do we need to go and beat out of someone?" PJ grinned, flexing his muscles, his grin widening at the sound of Maggie's laughter.
"Your ego's not changed then?"
Four hours and several coffee's later, PJ laid his head back on the couch, Maggie's feet in his lap and he gently massaged them as he tried to take it all in. It seemed that while his life had been falling apart back in Mt Thomas, while the supposed reality of her death had been forcing its way into his soul, Maggie had been in a coma in the hospital. Three weeks after she was shot, Maggie had finally woken up in hospital, her mind a blur.
The doctors had reluctantly filled in some of the blanks for her – she had been found in the wreck of a car, the body of a man next to her in the driving seat. She'd had catastrophic injuries, the extent of which had caused the doctors to put her into an induced coma so her body could begin to recover She'd had various internal injuries, apparently a branch had pierced the windscreen as the car had rolled, and that accounted for the pain in her chest and the grapefruit sized lump on her head.
It also apparently accounted for her inability to remember a thing about the accident – the accident and her entire life. Maggie – or Mel, as she now knew herself, had absolutely no recollection of anything before the moment she woke up in the hospital. As soon as she'd been well enough, the local police had interviewed her about the accident, but seeing as her driver's licence, along with that of her husband had been found in the wreck, they were comfortable with identifying her as Melanie Draper, wife of Richard Draper, deceased. Her handbag, containing further means if identification was found in the undergrowth, and there seemed to be no doubt as to who she was. Her initial confusion and total lack of connection with her name and background could be explained by the knock to the head and the amnesia that the accident had caused.
The good news was, however, that the babies had survived the accident. It seemed that 'Mel' was just over a month pregnant, and the doctors had done their very best to ensure that she had at least that part of her family still intact when she'd woken up. The news that her husband had died in the crash took a while to set in, and, if she were truthful, Maggie had admitted that she'd never really felt that she was missing him the way a wife should. She'd known that she was missing someone, but the man in the pictures the police had recovered for her, well he wasn't the one, however hard she'd tried to make it be.
PJ's arms had tightened around her as she spoke, and she buried her head in his neck, breathing him in, reassuring herself that he really was here. It was a while before she began to talk again, her thoughts wandering and in no particular semblance of order. She took him through the dark times, when she'd struggled to get her life back together. She took him through meeting Kay and Luka, and the friendship that had blossomed between the two women. Through leaving the hospital and Kay's neighbour choosing that particular time to move interstate, thus providing a home for 'Mel' and her future family.
Maggie took him through the birth, through the agony of bringing twins into the world without their father, without her 'husband' by her side. She took him through bringing the boys home, and the joy of having them there, tempered by the lows she'd experienced as a new mum – a new mum on her own still learning to cope with the blanks that the amnesia had created.
Maggie had stood, moving over to a cabinet and taking out three photograph albums, chock full of baby pictures. Pictures of Tom and Joe curled up together fast asleep on the day they arrived home. Pictures of the boys with mashed pumpkin smeared all over their delighted faces. Pictures of them in the bath, bubbles everywhere, of her and the boys all cuddled up together, of the boys and Luka, picture after picture after picture. PJ had flicked through them in silence, before looking up and seeing tears trailing down Maggie's face as the enormity of it all settled in again. PJ had missed out on all of this – he'd missed out on the birth, on all of the 'firsts' that she'd treasured, on everything.
Again, as had happened countless times throughout their talk, they held each other close, gentle kisses acting as reassurance, as unspoken and accepted apologies – not that there was anything to apologise for. Neither of them could have predicted what would happen that night, nor had they had any say in what resulted from it.
PJ had reached over and captured her lips in a long kiss. "Mags, I'm so sorry you had to go through all of that by yourself – and if I ever find out who - "
Maggie had stopped him with another kiss." Not now Peej. Now is just for us. Now is for talking. We can dig up the details later, but now is all about us. We need to catch up, to talk it out, to reconnect. Now is about getting to know each other again and for filling in the blanks."
PJ smiled. She'd always been the more level headed of the two of them, and it seemed that nothing had changed. Drawing her into his arms, he'd placed a gentle kiss on the top of her head. "You know what? I reckon that we've talked enough for today. Much more of this and my head will explode. I think we need a break, and I have the perfect thing. I reckon that there are two little nippers next door that I'd like to meet. What do you think?" he grinned at her, blue eyes alight with anticipation.