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Dad. She'd called him Dad. While her words just about made PJ's day, he was a little worried as to how the boys would take it. They hadn't exactly sat down and talked about how they were going to tell the boys. There hadn't really had the time to do that before Kay had dropped them off and Maggie had spoken without thinking.
PJ met her worried eyes as both he and Maggie sat and waited for the boys to react to her words. While they both knew that he was their father, and PJ couldn't help but smile at that thought, telling the boys that he was their Dad was a whole other thing. His small smile eased Maggie's mind, and she smiled back at him.
Tom and Joe, however, were oblivious to the tension that their parents were under.
''tective PJ? You hear? Mummy says Uniforms good as 'tectives, so there!" Tom said, risking a glance at his brother, before struggling to his feet, small chubby hands placed on his hips, his stance daring PJ to disagree. Joe, as ever protective of his Mum, and thoroughly agreeing with his twin, soon stood beside Tom, and it was a struggle for PJ to keep his emotions in check as he watched his sons, a sudden realisation of everything that he'd missed out on flashing across his face.
"It's ok, boys," he finally managed in what sounded to Maggie like a voice dangerously close to tears. "It's ok. I'm not having a go at your Mum. I think she's a wonderful Mum, and you are the luckiest boys in the world to have her as your Mummy." He looked up at Maggie as he spoke, and Tom glanced at Maggie, before looking over at Joe in confusion. 'Tective PJ was sad now?
"'tective PJ? You sad? Hug? Mummy likes hugs when she sad" Tom said, as Joe moved over and climbed up onto PJ's stomach, reaching up to wrap his small arms around his Dad's neck. "Is ok, we like 'tectives too. Mummy likes 'tectives, and me and Joe do too. See?"
Tom had reached over and taken Maggie's hand, pulling her over towards PJ. "Mummy? 'tective PJ sad, you need to hug him better." Maggie took her son's advice, and wrapped PJ into a hug, and Tom, having stood back and admired his handiwork, leapt into the fray, worming his way between his parents where he found a rather squashed Joe.
The family bear hug only stayed in place for a few seconds before both boys began to struggle to be free, and PJ suddenly shuddered as a small foot kicked him in an area no man should ever be kicked in, Maggie wincing in sympathy as she saw tears of pain form in his eyes.
"Mags, ah," PJ said, struggling to find his voice, and Maggie rolled the boys off her and PJ.
"That's enough now you two. Why don't you two go and grab your footy and have a kickaround in the back garden?"
Tom and Joe yelped with happiness, all thoughts of sad 'tectives long forgotten at the mention of football. "Yay!! Mummy, you come too?"
Maggie looked over at PJ, who was now sitting up against the wall, watching his family, smiling widely despite the pain. "Ah, not at the moment sweetheart, I think I'll stay with PJ here for a little while."
Tom looked over at PJ, and, seeing that he still didn't look completely happy, he wandered over to PJ, holding a hand out towards him." 'tective PJ come play?"
PJ smiled at his son. "Mate, I think I'll stay here too, but thanks for the offer. Maybe later?"
Tom glanced over at Joe, who reached over and took Maggie's hand, pulling her back to PJ. "Mummy, you play with 'tective PJ, and me and Joe will play footy. " he told them, placing Maggie's hand in PJ's and smiling at them both, before running out into the back garden.
PJ smiled at Maggie as the screen door closed behind their sons. "I love you Maggie Doyle," he said softly, wrapping his arms around you. "You have no idea how much I love you. Those boys, they're, Mags, they're – "
"Big foot?" Maggie grinned, glancing down.
"Just like their daddy" PJ grinned back, before glancing down as well. "Don't worry, I'm fine, although if you wanted to check for yourself…"
"PJ Hasham!" Maggie glared at him, before breaking into a grin. "Maybe later." And she couldn't help but laugh at the expression that flew across PJ's face. "Come on, you. Up you get," she said, pulling herself to her feet and holding out a hand to PJ. He stood up carefully, wrapping her into a hug.
"Like I said, Doyley, I love you," and he drew her into a kiss. "Listen, about before," PJ paused, unsure about to say what was running through his mind. She'd called him Dad. She'd called him Dad in front of the boys. They'd not picked up on it, it seemed, but still, they needed to figure out what they were going to say.
"You mean when I called you Dad?" Maggie said, to the point as ever.
"Ah, well, yes." PJ said, leading her over to the couch and sitting down, wrapping an arm around her but still keeping the boys in sight. "I think that we need to figure out what we're going to say Mags. I want to tell them, but, well, I've not really had that much experience around kids their age, and I don't know how to relate to them, I don't know how to talk to them."
"I'd say you're doing just fine PJ. They like you. Usually they're hesitant around men, they love Luka, but, well, he's an exception, and he's just a big kid anyway. On the whole, they're hesitant around men. Probably because they've only ever really been around me, or something. I suppose there's Dan too, but, he doesn't really count, and they like you, which is a huge step."
At the mention of Dan, PJ flinched slightly. That was a subject that he'd have to talk to her about later, but not now. Maggie too flinched when she saw PJ's reaction.
"PJ, I'm sorry."
PJ looked up, giving her a small smile before reaching over and placing a gentle kiss on her lips.
"Mags, it's ok"
"No, it's not. PJ listen to me. I can understand what you're thinking, but you have nothing to worry about. I love you PJ. You know that. Dan and me, we were only ever friends. I needed a friend, and he was there, but I promise you PJ, there was never anything else. Just friendship. There wasn't room for anything else, because even when I didn't know it was you, I still knew that I was desperately missing the man I'd loved so much. Geez, I'm waffling." Maggie sat up, pulling away from him slightly so that she could look him in the eyes as she spoke.
"PJ. I love you. I love you more than I ever thought possible. You're who I dreamed about, you're who I craved when I couldn't sleep, and you're who I want every single second of the day. I don't know how to put it any other way. I am in love with you, always have been, and always will be. Even when I thought I had been married, and they showed me the pictures of my supposed husband, I just knew that something wasn't right, because he wasn't you – "
PJ leaned up and kissed her. He kissed her until they both had to come up for air. "I know you love me, Mags, and I love you too. I'm sorry, I suppose I just – well, I - Mags, I missed you so much, and I guess knowing you've been up here, getting on with life without me – and before you say it, I know you weren't really getting on without me, cos you didn't remember me, it's just that - " PJ stopped, and took a deep breath, before smiling at her. "Now who's waffling?" he said with a grin.
"OK. So, I love you. I love you just as much as you love me. Actually, I love you in ways you can't even imagine, but more about that later" he said, with a suggestive waggle of his eyebrows, laughter erupting as she reached up out of his hug and whacked him on his arm.
"No, you know what I mean," he said, smiling as she wrapped his arms around her again. "We know how we feel about each other, and we know that, well, I know that I never want to lose you again. I want to be with you for the rest of my life Mags," he said, watching her eyebrows raise in surprise and a delighted smile flow across her face. "And yes, I was talking about what you think I'm talking about, and right now I have to kiss you again before I can do anymore talking" PJ said, promptly doing just what he'd just said.
Several minutes later, PJ once again surfaced, groaning as he did so. "Maggie Doyle," he shifted slightly against the couch. "Mags, we need to stop doing that, or I won't be held accountable for my actions"
Maggie sighed, moving slightly out of temptation's range. Taking a deep breath, she grinned at PJ. "Me either, PJ. Me either."
A shriek of laughter from the back garden broke the moment, and, truth be told, both Maggie and PJ were relieved. Much as they wanted it, reconnecting like that would have to wait until they were alone, and besides, there was the question of how to tell their sons that their father was alive, well and sitting in the lounge watching them play footy.
"Yeah, ah, so the boys then. How are we going to tell them that I'm their Daddy?" PJ asked, jumping slightly as the football rolled into view by his feet.
"Daddy?" A small voice said from his elbow, and PJ turned to see Joe staring up at him, a small scared look on his face.