Chapter 5

The next four weeks passed by so quickly I barely had time to register them. Shoot, between working at Bill's and Leo's, studying for finals, finalizing my graduate school applications, doing research in the lab with Dr Sivadone, and putting the finishing touches on my senior research project I barely had time to eat or sleep. But somehow I made it through. By some miracle I aced all my classes and passed physical chemistry with a B.

A very high B mind you, an 89.994 to be precise, it should have been rounded to a 90 which would be a very low A but an A nonetheless. However, Dr. Stykes, who has a twelve foot iron rod shoved up his ass, is a lousy excuse for a human being who sits on his high horse and won't change a grade for nothing. Now, I'm not usually this anal about grades, I mean a grade is only someone else's opinion of how well you grasp a certain subject matter, but in this case I honestly believe that I deserved that A but was denied for personal reasons (i.e. I turned him down for a date). Any who, enough about Dr. Stykes; I'm finished with him and I'll never have to see him again, I hope.

Finals were over and graduation day had come…and gone. I had been given two tickets for graduation and so I, of course, invited my Aunt Suzie and Benny. Aunt Suzie could only afford to take two days off work, so she flew in on Thursday morning and spent the day with Kells and I. On Friday Benny drove up for the ceremony and afterwards the three of us had a nice family dinner; Kellie had dinner with her own family. Saturday, around noon, Aunt Suzie flew back to Bartelso and shortly after that the other monkeys drove up for the party that Kellie and I were throwing at Leo's Lounge.

I had managed to save up enough tip money so that Kellie and I could split the party expenses fifty-fifty. Leo had originally wanted to close the lounge to the public and only allow invited party guests, but Kellie and I, being the little study bunnies that we were, didn't really know that many people outside the chemistry building. And getting a bunch chemists together to party doesn't really make things very interesting, so we convinced Leo to open the lounge back up to the public and just inform any non-party guests that tonight wouldn't be your average night at Leo's and they would have to fend for themselves. In other words, there weren't any waitresses on staff that night and only Leo and Darrel were behind the bar making specialty drinks.

The one thing that did remain the same as any other Saturday night at Leo's was the live music, and the music was provided by the 100 Monkeys, who came fully equipped with their own screaming fan girls. It was my second 100 Monkeys concert and once again I wouldn't be able to remember much of it; the first time was thanks to the killer headache I got, this time it was because I was partying too much, well I wouldn't really call it "too much," it seemed just enough to me. One thing I knew I would never be able to forget, no matter how much alcohol was in my system, was how damn good lookin' Jackson was.

That evening he donned a grey button down dress shirt, black tie, dark jeans, and cowboy boots. His smile was as gorgeous as ever, and his eyes were especially bright. Throughout the concert, I couldn't tear my eyes away from Jackson for more than what it took to ask Leo for another beer. With each passing minute my desire for Jackson grew stronger. I was lost in a daze as I watched his fingers glide effortlessly over the keyboard or strum away at the guitar. There was no denying it; I wanted Jackson, and I wanted him bad. How was I going to keep up the "friends" charade for Benny?

"Whoooo!" Kellie screamed with the rest of the monkey crowd as the song ended. "Isn't this amazing?"

"Completely." I responded dully.

"What's the matter Amy? You look pained."

"I am. I can't do this Kells. I can't be friends with him. What was I thinking?"

"Well that's easy you weren't, and I think you mean you can't be just friends with him. There's nothing wrong with friends with benefits. Hell, that's what you and Dillon are, except he's still dreaming of the day when you decide to be more. That boy would marry you today if you'd let him." She rambled.

"Kells, why are you talking about Dillon when I'm having a total Jackson melt down?"

"Right, sorry, Jackson. So tell me again, why did you tell Jackson that you just wanted to be friends?"

I bowed my head in shame. "Buhenny." I mumbled.

"What?"

"Benny." I said more clearly.

"Oh. I thought you guys worked things out?"

"We did. We talked things over, and he knows that I drink now and that I'm into guys, but he just doesn't know how into guys I am."

"Again I think you mean how guys are in to you."

"Definitely not." I shook my head and it felt like a sack of potatoes was being tossed about inside. "Kells, how am I going to fix this? I mean just look at him, he's so damn beautiful."

"I am far too gone to give any good advice right now Me-Me, but I think you've just gotta go for it because clearly you're about to burst." She laughed at my torment.

"You know what," I laughed back, "I think that is the best damn advice you've ever given me. I think I'm just gonna go up to him and say: 'Hey, Jackson, you wanna get outta here with me cause I totally just want to screw your brains out right now.'"

"Hey, it might work." Kellie laughed.

"Certainly forthcoming and assertive, guys like that don't they?" I laughed with her. We were so wrapped up in our laughter that we didn't even notice that the band had finished playing or that Ben and Jackson had joined our group.

"What's so funny?" Benny asked as Jackson lifted the bottle of Bud Light to his lips and took a swig.

"Nothing," Kellie answered; I was too preoccupied with watching Jackson.

"Didn't seem like nothing."

"It's an inside joke." Kellie and I giggled and the boys looked confused. "Now I'm truly sorry Me-Me, but I've got to leave you now."

"What are you talking about Kells?" I gripped her arm. I didn't think I could keep up the friends act for very long without her.

"I've been having my own melt down and now I'm going to go take my own advice and go for it." She broke my grip and stumbled away.

I was so jealous of her; she was going to get her fix and I was left alone with my cousin and my torturer. Though, I suppose if you wanted to be technical about it I was my own torturer because I was the one who so foolishly said 'let's just be friends.' Either way, I was just tossed to the wolves by my best friend.

I cautiously took a swig of my own beer to calm my nerves; it didn't help much.

"So, that was a great show." I stammered. "At least I think it was. Everything's kinda muddled right now." Jackson chuckled and nodded in understanding. Benny just smiled feebly.

"Aims," Benny began in his lecturing voice, but I interjected before he could say anymore.

"I warned you Benny. I told you I had only one thing in mind for tonight and that was to get shit-face drunk because it's my damn graduation party and that was my prerogative." My words were slurred together as I tried to be forceful.

"I was just going to say congratulations again."

"Oh, well thanks Benny. That's very sweet of you."

"That's our Benny. He's just bursting with sweetness." Jackson teased as he pinched Benny's cheek.

Benny smacked Jackson's hand away from his face. "If you'll excuse me, I have to piss."

And then it was just Jackson and I as Benny walked off. Jackson took another swig of his beer and I mimicked with my own; he smirked. I really didn't think I could keep up the act now, and I really didn't think I wanted to. But maybe I wouldn't be so forthcoming as I said would. Perhaps I could go about it more smoothly.

"So I have this new theory I'm testing and I'm looking for some candidates. Maybe you could help me." I said.

"Oh, and what's that?" he asked curiously.

"Well you see, my friend, well she told me that things are bigger in Texas and I wanted to see if she was right."

"Did she now? And what sort of things are we talking about?"

"Ah, you know," I looped two fingers in one of his belt loops and pulled his waist to mine; he steadied himself by placing his free hand on the small of my back; I let a finger gently stroke his protruding hip bone; "things," I finished my sentence with a simple shrug and an innocent smile.

Jackson tried to hide his sudden lack of breath by taking another swig of beer. I continued to gently stroke his hip, and he kept his hand planted firmly on back; it was almost as if he were trying to pull me closer actually. In fact, our pelvises were so close that I could feel him swell slightly as my fingers dipped below his jeans.

"And, uh, how exactly did you want me to help?" He struggled to keep his words clear and his voice even.

"Well, I was wondering if you knew of any good Texan boys who would be willing to participate in my little study."

"And what kind of study would it be?"

"Hands on testing mostly. They'd have to be able to take the heat because it could it hot, really hot." His breathing became hurried and uneven. "So, can you think of anybody?"

"Actually, there is one that comes to mind." He wrapped his arm more fully around my waist.

"Oh really? Do you think you could introduce us? I'm really anxious to meet him."

He grinned devilishly, his eyes shimmering with lust, and shifted his beer to the hand behind my back. I could feel the cold wetness soaking through my thin shirt. He wiped his hand off his pants leg and handed it to me for a shake.

"The name's Jackson Rathbone." He smiled.

"Hmm, it's a pleasure to meet you Mr. Rathbone." I smiled back and shook his hand.

"Do you want to get out of here?" He asked with a nod towards the door.

"Hell yes, but I can't drive and I don't have a car."

"Hmm, I don't have a car here either. We all came together." Damn. Stupid monkeys and their carpooling.

"Hold on, I have a solution for this. I'll just be a minute." I gently removed his hand from my waist.

"Hurry back, you've kind of gotten me wiled up now."

I grinned, perfect. I leaned in to whisper in his ear, "Just occupy your thoughts with my dirty little secrets because you're about to learn a few first hand." I finished off the rest of my beer in one gulp and walked away.