Chapter 10

As the week progressed Jackson continued to swing by the hotel before heading home to the boys. Occasionally we would just talk with our words and not our bodies, but usually we saved that for when we were with the guys.

*~*

I lay on my back, the sheets pulled up to my waist keeping my breasts exposed. Jackson was propped up on his side tracing little circles over my chest and stomach. I enjoyed these quiet moments with Jackson more than with any other guy I had been with.

"What were you and Johnson talking about last night?" He asked out of nowhere.

I thought back to the moment he was referring to.

*~*

Benny and I were standing in the hallway of the Monkey place; the rest of the guys, including Jackson and Kellie, were in the living room drinking. I had pulled Benny aside to show him the thing I had mentioned when I first arrived. Benny held a piece of paper in his hands and he was reading it carefully; it was from North Carolina.

"Frankie is getting out on parole?" He asked.

"Maybe, depending on how the hearing goes I guess. It's a courtesy letter, letting me know that I can attend if I want to but my presence is not required." I looked up at him. "I don't know what to do Benny. Kellie thinks I should go."

"Really? Well I don't think you should."

"It's her brother." Kellie interjected; I hadn't even seen her join us.

"He's not a part of her life anymore. He lost that twelve years ago." Benny defended.

"Maybe, but she still suffers from their actions."

"Kellie, that's enough." I said sternly. Sometimes Kellie had a bad habit of butting in when she wasn't wanted. "Just forget it; I'll figure it out on my own."

"What's going on?" Jackson asked as he came down the hall.

"Nothing." I ripped the letter from Benny's hands, folded it and stuffed it into my back pocket. "It's nothing." I looked at Jackson and saw a twinge of hurt in his eyes at my tone. I briskly walked past him and grabbed a beer from the fridge.

*~*

"Amy?" Jackson questioned, pulling me out of my flashback.

"It was nothing." I responded halfheartedly.

"Really? Interesting, because, you look as scared now as you did then."

"I was just showing Benny a letter I got from North Carolina." Why was I telling him this? I hated talking about my past.

"From your family?"

"It doesn't matter." I replied quickly.

"Doesn't matter? It's your family. Of course it matters."

I turned my head and looked away. I didn't want to fight with him, but I didn't want to talk about it either.

"I'd like to know about them, your parents I mean. Why did you leave North Carolina? It has obviously played a big part in your life. Will you share with me?" I knew he was only trying to help, but it didn't matter. I could feel the tears prick my eyes, but instead of giving in to him I did what I always do; I got angry.

"My family Jackson? You really want to know about my family?" I asked harshly as I looked him square in the eye.

"Yes."

"My parents are Paul and Suzanne Johnson, and my brother is Benjamin. That's all you need to know." I quickly rolled out of bed and began to put my clothes back on.

"Amy," Jackson said calmly.

"Speaking of whom," I interrupted; I couldn't handle his kindness right now. "Benny should be here shortly so you should probably get dressed." I tossed his clothes at him and left the room in a hurry.

Luckily Kellie didn't see me storm out of my room because she was still getting ready for our night out with the guys. They had another show tonight and the six of us were going to dinner first, so Jackson told the guys that he would just meet them at our hotel room to save time.

I went to the "kitchen" and grabbed a bottle of water, and I quickly gulped it down and leaned against the small counter. I had to get my emotions in tact before Benny arrived. Jackson came out of the room slowly but didn't say anything because Kellie had just left her room too. She could feel the tension in the air and knew immediately that something was up.

"What did I miss?" She asked, eyeing first Jackson and then me.

"Nothing." I said; apparently that was my new favorite word.

"Really? 'Cause it doesn't look like nothing."

"Just mind your own business Kells!" I snapped. I could seek Jackson's eyes widen.

"Whoa, looks like somebody took her bitch pill this morning." Kellie fired back.

There was a knock on the door and I pushed myself off the counter to answer it. Of course it was the guys. They walked in completely clueless and laughing. Their good mood seemed out of place in the hotel suite.

"Hey, Jay you made it." Ben G said.

"Yea." Jackson replied.

"How long have been here?" Benny asked.

"Not long."

"Can we go now?" I was still unhappy. The guys looked at me curiously. "I'm hungry." And I was, sort of.

"Sure. I'm hungry too." Jerad responded. And just like that I had dampened their good mood.

I was the first to walk out of the hotel room and Kellie brought up the rear. I turned to go right, but apparently the others decided to go left.

"Amy, where are you going?" Benny asked. I stopped and turned around.

"To the lobby." I answered like it was obvious.

"The elevator is this way."

"Yea, and the stairs are this way." I pointed over my shoulder.

"We're on the sixth floor."

"And?" I failed to see his point.

Kellie slowly walked up to me and took my hand. "Come on Me-Me," She said sweetly. "It will be ok." She added soft enough so that only I could hear, and squeezed my hand lightly; I hated elevators.

I nodded very slightly before walking with her to the elevator. I could already feel the anxiety rising. We stood waiting for the elevator to arrive for I don't know how long.

"The stairs would be faster." I said impatiently.

"Eh, no worries it's here." One of the guys said; I didn't catch who because a large lump had formed in the pit of my stomach very suddenly.

The elevator doors opened and an older couple stepped out. We filed through the doors. I quickly found the rail that went around the very tiny box, and gripped it firmly. With my back to the wall, I leaned my head back and closed my eyes. I took a deep breath. I really hated elevators.

"We're going up." Some girl said. Oh great.

"No problem, we'll just ride it out." I'm pretty sure that was Graupner.

I swallowed a lump.

"Hey, you're the 100 Monkeys right?" That was a different girl.

"Yea." Jackson replied.

"Eeeep." Oh great, fan girls.

"I can't believe this." The first girl said.

"We were just on our back to our room to get ready for the show tonight." The second added. At least there appeared to only be two of them.

I tried to focus on my breathing while the guys talked with the girls. God this had to be the slowest elevator around. At last it came to a stop.

"Before we leave, can we have an autograph?" Just great. I rolled my eyes behind my closed lids.

"Sure. Have you got a pen?" Jerad responded.

"Uh, a pen? Uhm… no. Have you?

"Let's see a pen? Hmm…" I heard a lot of shuffling as everyone searched for a pen.

"Aims, do you have a pen?" Benny asked.

I slowly shook my head no.

"What's her problem?" one of the girls asked.

"Don't mind her." Kellie responded. "She's just a little crabby today." Way to have my back Kells.

"Why don't you ladies bring a pen to the show tonight and we'll make sure you get an autograph then." Jackson was always the gentleman.

"Great. Thanks."

I guess about another minute passed while they said their goodbyes. Finally I heard the door squeak as it closed, and I felt a jostle as I imagine all the guys jumped at the take off. Could they be any more juvenile? Ok, so maybe I was being a little bitchy, but I really, really, hated elevators.

I went back to focusing on my breathing while the elevator slowly made its decent, and I do mean slowly. It practically crept along inch by inch. It really must have been the slowest elevator ever made.

The elevator jerked to a sudden stop, and then it started again. And then once more it jerked to a stop. My eyes sprung open and I looked at the floor maker. The third floor? We were only on the third floor? Then why did it stop? I walked to the button panel and pushed the 'door open' button. Nothing happened. I pushed it harder but again nothing happened. I began to frantically push more buttons but still there seemed to be no response from the elevator.

Suddenly it felt like a great force was pressing against my lungs, restricting my breathing. My eyes clouded over and I could feel my heart pounding against my chest. It got real hot real fast. I was sweating in seconds. I was still pushing the buttons but eliciting no response.

"Kellie."