Authors rambling: After reading book five, it cost me quite an effort, to continue translating this fic. Why, you'll find out in chapter 27. But I told myself to do it anyway, at least until then and wait up, if anyone is going to lynch me then :-P

Since my very good friend Niara is at the moment understandably quite busy, Slytherin Silver Snake took over the beta reading job for now. Thank you both so much for spending your precious free time with this mistake loaded fic of mine.

Chapter 4:

Dumbledores worries:

Arriving at the gargoyle, which was guarding the moving staircase, Harry and his friends instantly found out that they were not the only ones who had found their way there.

Nearly the complete class of fifth year Gryffindors had assembled in the passage before Dumbledore's office and Harry could even spot Draco Malfoy with five other Slytherins, standing a bit to one side and doing their best to stare spitefully at the Gryffindors. They did fail miserably to transpire the usual sneer though, since they were too busy trying to hide their evident concern. No wonder, Harry thought. Snape may be Slytherin's Head of House, but the fact that he had deducted 120 points from them was not easy to digest and they would not simply accept it, Snape or not.

To the contrary, the faces of the Gryffindors showed nothing but open indignation. They all stood in small groups discussing, underpinning their loud words of complaint with wild gesticulating.

But as Harry and his friends drew near and the other students became aware of them, the discussions died immediately and Neville hurried over to them.

"Do you know the password?"

"Yes," Harry answered. "If Dumbledore didn't change in the last month, then I do. Three weeks ago, he made me come up, because he was worried about my security."

Neville nodded with understanding and the rest of the Gryffindors stepped aside, opening an aisle, to let Harry, Hermoine and Ron get access to the gargoyle.

"I think it would be better, if we didn't all go to the Headmaster," Lavender Brown threw in. "A small group would probably get more results and look less like an invasion."

A snorted, dismayed laughter came from the direction of the Slytherins.

"Then best send Potter. The old man eats from the palm of his hand anyway. Our golden Griffindork will surely convince him to give us our house points back." Draco's voice and expression were depreciating and poisonous, as he regarded the Gryffindor high nosed, his arms crossed over his chest.

An intense silence fell over the group and all eyes moved to Harry. He knew only too well that the headmaster had let him get away with quite a lot already. But only a few of the other pupils knew that Dumbledore knew of all the experience he had already gathered in the fight against the dark side. He had been opposed and risked much in his short life, for he was on the top priority-list of people who Voldemort wanted to see dead. Therefore he got to know secrets and things, which the other students had no idea of. It was probably not because of the Headmaster's preference towards him, like the Slytherins thought, but to protect the other students. Letting them stay away from the grisly side of the fast approaching war.

Harry didn't have that luxury. He was at risk and had to be able to defend himself if need be, and thus he got entrusted, but also burdened, with more details. Harry would have switched places with the other students immediately because his unwanted celebrity came along with many sorrows and dangers.

Contrary to the others, he could not just be an ordinary child any longer, with worries not going beyond the next school test or date with girls.

"Yeah, and Harry has already fought You-Know-Who and survived, while you have pretended to be half-dead after getting no more than a scratch from a Hippogriff," Ron hissed heatedly at Draco.

The blond Slytherin let out a howl of rage and moved hastily towards the Gryffindors. Harry, recognizing the approaching fight, quickly turned around to face the gargoyle. "Lollipop!" he called and the large statue jumped to the side instantly, revealing the rotary stairs to Dumbledores office.

Harry grabbed Ron, who was expecting Draco with clenched fists and fire in his eyes, dragging his friend along through the opening. Hermione followed them rapidly and the rest of the Gryffindors blocked Draco until the gargoyle had moved back to its old place, blocking the entrance effectively.

Thankfully, Ron didn't seem too upset about the missed fight with Draco, since he was grinning broadly. "Well done for that Slytherin rat that he's not going to come and see the Headmaster. He can scream and shout until he's green in the face for all I care." Ron was quiet for a while until he suddenly giggled out loud. "He'd fit even better into his house then."

Harry laughed and turned to look at his still giggling friend. Even Hermione was grinning madly.

When they reached the upper end of the stairs and faced the big oak door, leading to Dumbledores office, their good mood vanished at once and they remembered why they had come here in the first place. Harry knocked on the door, which the old Headmaster opened shortly after. He looked down at them with questioning benevolent and sparkling eyes. Hermione seemed to be almost as indignant as she had been in the dungeons.

"What's the honour of your visit, children?" the headmaster asked, while he stepped aside and waved them into the room. "Come on in and have a seat. Would you like some tea? I have something here that you just have to try out."

Harry and his friends nodded politely, entering the big, circular room that was stuffed with books and all kind of knickknacks on shelves, filling almost the entire wall.

Dumbledore led them to a blue flower-printed and cosy looking couch with a tea table, sitting by the window to the left of Dumbledores desk.

The headmaster then left through a small door into an adjoining room only to come back a minute later. He had his wand directed at a tableau, which was floating behind him, like a dog on a leash and which was carrying a colourful tea can as well as four mugs.

With a swing of his wand, the old wizard let the tableau sink onto the small tea table and then pointed it to the carpet in front of the tea table, facing the couch.

"Aparere sedile."

Instantly the green, red and golden dragons and phoenixes woven into the carpet moved aside and an easy chair, matching the couch, grew right out of the floor. Dumbledore sank into it and reached for the beautifully painted tea can and filled the mugs with a steaming, dark fluid.

"It's an old family recipe. My great grandfather was a real master in tea brewing," he announced merrily.

It seemed kind or absurd to imagine the great grandfather of a man who was 150 years of age, but the three kids didn't comment on it. They each took a mug, sipping on the so-called tea with a hint of suspicion.

After hesitating at first, Harry had to admit that the taste of the brew was pretty peculiar, yet not bad. The tea smelled like cinnamon, but while drinking it Harry had rather the impression of vanilla, yet with a smooth fruity aftertaste.

"Strawberry?" asked Hermione, after taking a tentative sip herself.

"No way. It's chocolate," Ron protested resolutely.

Dumbledore's eyes sparkled as he smiled happily. "This tea is changing aroma all the time. It's a true adventure each time. Almost like Berty Botts beans in every flavour, with the only difference that you'll never get a taste you don't like with this tea. So if someone doesn't like chocolate for example, he will never get that taste, even though somebody else who does like it can very well get that aroma.

Harry cleared his throat to get Dumbledore's attention and put his mug carefully back down on the table. As fascinating as this tea may be, they were here for another reason. "Professor Dumbledore. "We -- meaning our class, has a problem."

Intrigued, Dumbledore raised one eyebrow, leaning back against his easy chair. "What problem could possibly concern the whole class?"

"Snape…I mean Professor Snape," Hermione shot forward. "He was terrible during class today."

The Headmaster could not stop the low chuckle escaping his throat. "I believe that this is hardly an unusual occurrence."

"This time it was different though. He took a whole 280 points from Gryffindor. And this was without any provocation or any reason at all."

"He let mine and Harry's essays fail without even looking at them, and Hermione's failed as well, only because it was longer than he had asked," Ron fell in.

"And when we made only the slightest noise, he tossed over his desk and chased us out of the dungeons," Hermione added.

"He even took 120 points off Slytherin," Harry concluded.

The old wizards expression had visibly darkened during their story. The twinkle in his eyes had dimmed and he sank in on himself, staring sadly forward.

After a while, Dumbledore put his mug slowly back on the table and rose silently to his feet. He moved over to the big window, staring absently outside, his back turned to the teenagers.

"I will, of course, give you and the Slytherins the points back and I'll also have a talk with Severus about this matter. I promise that this will not repeat itself. You can let the others know about that."

The Headmaster's voice, for once, didn't carry the usual cheerfulness and slight malice but sounded sad and broken.

Harry exchanged a worried glance with Ron and Hermione. "What's wrong, Headmaster?"

Dumbledore sighed deeply but he didn't turn around, still hefting his gaze somewhere outside the window. "I think that I misjudged some things, that's all."

"Misjudged?" Ron echoed.

"Deep down, Severus is not a bad person, you know," Dumbledore said absently. "He's just been too hard on himself. Life has not been gentle to him and he learned to survive by being strong and never to bend nor budge. He never learned a different way to cope with it all. He had practically sucked in his mother milk, to be proud and hold his head high. It has always been like this, even in school."

The Headmaster sighed before continuing. "After the 'accident' with Lupin it was exactly this pride that had led him to Voldemort. He had been too self-confident and ambitious for his own good, just as most Slytherins are in fact. Men like Severus have been raised to dominate and to never show any weakness under any circumstance. By submitting to Voldemort, Severus had been granted a power and sense of satisfaction and justice, which I denied him. He had been terribly shaken after the incident with the Shrieking Shack, and when I played it all down I made him a victim a second time. Turning away from Voldemort meant for Severus to give up this power, his self-esteem and a whole lot of his pride. He has been willing to knowingly degrade himself in front of others, especially the Ministry. This has cleaved a large scar in Severus' soul and his attitude today is not much more than a tool to protect himself, and to keep and feel what he has left of his pride. All else would be a sign of weakness, which had been refused and thought unthinkable for all his life."

He finally turned around, looking at the three students intently. "Don't misunderstand me. I trust him with my life and he has done so much for our cause without ever getting much in return. Unfortunately I fear that this is part of the problem. He is perfectly aware that it's only me who honestly wants to have him here. All the others he's tolerated at best. Even in my case he thinks that I favour his acting as a spy over his person. He's been needed but not wanted. Neither from the one side nor from the other. The ministry would probably lock him away in Azkaban in a heartbeat, if it weren't for me and Hogwarts, and he's perfectly aware of this too. Of course, Voldemort also using him and his knowledge, but contrary to our side, there he gets power as recompense. And now it's looking as if Voldemort is winning the war. This is basically ripping Severus apart. Part of him fights the temptation of the dark side, when another part of him is more than insecure..." Again the Headmaster made a thoughtful pause before he continued. "The dark side and its promise for fame and power is strong, and when someone was once on it's side this person will have to struggle for all their life. Power over others is a strong feeling which can be quite addictive. The dark side's calling is strong, and the stronger Voldemort is becoming, the stronger is Severus urge for justice. His justice, which can give him back what he lost, the only thing he ever possessed, his dignity."

The three friends had been listening part fearful, part fascinated.

"You want to tell by that that Snape will go back to Voldemort, Sir?" Harry asked.

Dumbledore took a deep breath. "I sincerely hope that it will not come to that. I once vouched for him at court and have thus saved his life. I have given him a job and a reason to go on, and that's why he, after his own understanding of things, owes me. In reality I owe him just as much however, but he always weighted his dept greater than mine. This is what is keeping him on our side. You have to know that his sense of honour is as strong as his pride.

I just hope that it will be enough, so that he will not act against my will."

"And what if he does that anyway?" Hermione asked doubtful.

Dumbledore smiled painfully. "Then that would be prove that I'm a miserable judge of character and I would have to hand him over to the ministry."

Harry swallowed hard. It was a common believe that the headmaster was too trusting. Dumbledore had always blindly trusted Snape and Harry didn't dare to imagine what it would take to make the old wizard doubt the potions masters loyalty himself. Unwilling, he thought about the previous scene he had witnessed between Snape and Sirius.

"Professor Dumbledore…" he hesitated. Should he really talk about this? But it was vital that Dumbledore held all available information if Snape was at risk to cross over again. The Potions Master had always been an angry, bitter man, but Harry preferred to get points taken by him than being at the receiving end of one of the Unforgivable curses. Not to mention that it would break Dumbledore's heart if Snape would really betray them. Harry had never understood why, but the old wizard really seemed to care a big deal about Snape.

"Yes, Harry?" Dumbledore urged gently.

Harry exchanged a meaningful look with Ron, before he took a deep breath and started to talk. "Ron and I have eavesdropped on Snape, as he threatened Sirius."

Dumbledore nodded attentively. "Yes, Sirius has told me about this encounter. Severus seemed to be quite…ahem…bitter, he said."

Which had to be the understatement of the Century, Harry thought, but he was glad that the headmaster didn't comment on the fact that Ron and he had been out after curfew. Because if Sirius had told him about the fight, then Dumbledore was aware that this had happened in the middle of the night.

"That's not all," he continued. "After Sirius had left him, Snape cradled his left forearm, saying that he didn't need you, Sir. And, even though I don't know if it's important, but he called Voldemort the Dark Lord in a very admiring voice."

After hearing this, Dumbledore went to his desk and let himself fall heavily into his chair, making it groan under the sudden weight. The Headmaster closed his eyes briefly as if to gather some inner strength. Then he looked back over to the three teenagers. "Please go back now and tell the others that they are getting the taken points back. I will send for Severus right away. There are some things I will need to discuss with him.

Harry and his friends nodded worriedly and left the office silently.

**********************

T.B.C.