Okay people. These chapters here are extremely violent and I had trouble writing them myself. Yet, like I said before, I have read up to torture and I follow a scheme here. If you can't handle goriness on children, please skip the lower part of this chapter. I myself have four small kiddies and I sometimes think to myself, that I really went over the boarder there. Thankfully they're only fictive charas, so I can stand it. But you all have been warned, so don't yell at me afterwards.
Chapter 37
Blood and Innocence:
Dumbledore found Remus and Sirius in his rooms with a game of chess, whereby Sirius was busying himself to poke his bishop absent-mindedly, while Lupin regarded the field with concentration. The headmaster had to smile at this. He had never imagined Sirius Black to be a chess playing type, but the former marauder must be bored to death, now that he was locked up in those rooms for such a long time. Even now, after Dumbledore had magically enlarged them and had created a gymnastics room for him to do some physical work in, Sirius had even begun to read out of pure boredom. Nevertheless, these restrictions were far better than the prospect on the future that Dobby had told them about and Sirius had, as well as Severus, consented to do everything possible to alter that.
Thoughts of the potions master stirred a controversial feeling in Dumbledore. Severus had become a good friend, as far as the young wizard allowed friendship at all, and Dumbledore felt responsible for the man, who had never really had the chance of a good life - partially also by his fault. Severus' death in Harry's vision had deeply shaken Albus. But somehow, knowing that Severus would have preferred it that way, made him grateful that his young friend had not had to suffer much, prior to his death. But now, knowing that it hadn't happened that way and that Severus was being tortured, a selfish feeling of relief rose in him. They still had a chance to save him and he may not have to process another failure towards the man.
"And? Who is winning?" he asked.
Sirius jumped off his chair, the game immediately forgotten.
"How is Harry?"
Dumbledore smiled courteously and made a reassuring gesture with his hand. "Harry is all right. His arm was broken, but Poppy should dismiss him in a few hours."
A big weight seemed to be lifted from Sirius' shoulder and he took a relieved breath. "Merlin thanks. But what happened down there on the Quidditch pitch?"
"He had another vision, right?" Remus asked.
Dumbledore nodded.
"Voldemort?"
Dumbledore nodded again.
Sirius swore under his breath. "Doesn't that boy ever get any peace," he exclaimed loudly.
"I'm afraid, that will only happen, when Voldemort is defeated once and for all, " answered Dumbledore sadly. "But for the moment we have another problem. Harry saw Voldemort speaking to Lucius Malfoy." Dumbledore inhaled deeply. "Severus is alive but he is being tortured."
As if in slow motion, Remus too got out of his chair now. "But Harry has seen...?"
Dumbledore stroked his beard thoughtfully. "Voldemort is depraved and powerful enough to bring someone to the edge of death in a most brutal way, and still not to let him die."
"So, that slippery snake has managed to pull himself out of the loop once again."
"Sirius!" Remus called out warningly.
Dumbledore briefly closed his eyes and sighed. The bitterness and dislike that prevailed between Sirius and Severus was deeply rooted and the longer that lasted, the less Albus believed that they might ever get over this dislike. It would not help anything if he were to reprimand Sirius now for his thoughtless words. Just the same as if he would be talking to Severus, defending the Animagus. As long as the two of them could not forget their distrust and change their point of view of the other, there would never be more than forced tolerance for one another.
"Do we know where he is being held?" Remus asked.
"Regrettably not. I will ask the other members of the Order if they can figure out the hiding place in which he could be imprisoned. We already found some secret places of Voldemort's and assume some more, which we must work on. I'm afraid that for the moment this is the only possibility which we have."
Waking up was getting harder and more painful every time and that Severus would have preferably have stayed under the dull blanked of not knowing and not feeling, yet he was inexorably driven back to the surface of consciousness. Immediately, he noticed the burning feeling, where actually his hands, feet and back should be located.
Finally he found himself on his side, lying on the ground of his cell once more. The rough soil dug painfully into his skin and his mutilated hands were just in front of his eyes, making the chains and the refastened manacles clear for him to see. The only difference were the two rings, which were not put around his wrists anymore, but broke through his hands which Lucius had burned a hole though. Severus was a little astonished. The wounds should've actually hurt more, and why was he having the impression that a horde of small ants was crawling over his field of view?
Something in his head spoke about the lack of food, blood loss, dehydration and exhaustion, but it was too much of an expenditure to think about it, so he didn't try and gave way to the crushing exhaustion, closing his eyes again.
He had the feeling to just have fallen unconscious again, when he was pulled back into reality which such an abruptness that only 'Enervate' could cause.
He opened the eyes, as, for a short moment, all tiredness was torn of him and the pain of his neck, back, hands and feet crashed upon him. Someone whimpered and before he could completely figure out that it had been himself, the exhaustion crept back into his bones, dulling the pain once more.
His eyes fell closed once again but before he could drown completely into oblivion, he noticed that someone had taken hold of his shoulders and raised his upper body into a sitting position. Something cool touched his dry lips, and as the first drop of a liquid wetted the drained skin and flowed into his mouth he swallowed it greedily. The liquid was bitter, but that was unimportant. Severus' body cried for fluid and the small sip seemed like a mockery, when no more followed.
"Come on, Severus. You are not going to give up already? I am not finished with you yet."
Severus knew this sardonic voice that penetrated through his mind's darkness. A wave of warmth traversed his body and the lingering fuzziness left his consciousness. Malfoy had given him a strengthening-potion, so that his body and mind, too worn out under the abuse, wouldn't sink into deep unconsciousness. Enervate had no longer been enough to do that apparently and so Malfoy had alleviated some of the after-effects of the torture. Yet Severus still felt this unbelievable thirst and painful hunger cramps kept on tormenting him while the rest of his body seemed to be on fire, but his mind cleared up more with each passing second while his exhaustion was reduced noticeably. They didn't even leave him the escape of unconsciousness...
He opened his eyes and saw Malfoy, who kneeled at his side and held him upright in a sitting position. The blond Death Eater smiled and loosened his grasp. Severus remained sitting and lowered his eyes to his blemished hands with the manacles. His body had shaken off the exhaustion yet his spirit felt unbelievably tired.
"Your hands have always been very skilful, Severus," Malfoy whispered in a thoughtful intonation. "It's a shame and a waste, really, but at present they are not worth anything anymore. Even if you would escape from here, they wouldn't heal easily. Not even with magic. The dark curse that I used is much too old and powerful."
Severus felt the tears rising into his eyes again and he fought it no longer. What for? It just seemed too much a struggle to care about his hands at this point. He was of no use anyway now. Already forgotten from the world so why should he still care?"
"Don't let it get to you, Severus. Are you thirsty?"
Malfoy's voice was very sociable once more and Severus bit his lower lip until he tasted blood, when a small residual of pride, which had been pushed somewhere into the back of his head, prevented him to pleadingly nod. Yes, he was thirsty. Incredibly thirsty, even more now after the few drops of the potion had reminded him of the liquid which his body demanded. Now, he once again remembered how it felt to have his swollen tongue and desiccated mouth moistened.
Malfoy sighed, as if an inconvenient assumption of him would have been confirmed. "Why are you still fighting me? You're only making it harder on all of us."
Again, he sighed, stood up and walked to the door. Severus suppressed the nearly over-powerful urge to call Lucius back and plead for some water. To apologize for his silence and stubbornness. Everything, just to get something to drink, to hear the friendly words again and not the angry threats. For just a bit of compassion, he was nearly ready to sell his soul and what little of his brain realized that felt repulsed by it.
But Malfoy was gone for only a few minutes, before he came back. Yet, this time he was not alone. Severus looked up again, trying hard to banish the pleading expression from his face. Nott had stepped into the cell together with Lucius herding four scared children in, before them.
Snape's eyes widened in a bad presentiment, when he saw the three girls and one boy enter. One of the girls was about eight, but the other three kids were hardly older than four, whereas the smallest of them clasped a brown teddy, one eye hanging by a black thread out of the stuffed animal's snouted face, tightly to her chest.
Lucius again walked over to Severus and kneeled down before him. "I saw those kids this morning in a muggle play-yard and thought that I could bring them along as a gift for you. For you alone, old friend. Don't you want to thank me?"
Severus stared in disbelief at Malfoy. His mouth moved and he swallowed, but couldn't get a sound passed his lips.
Malfoy only smiled, rose again and went to the children, where he kneeled likewise and regarded them affably. Still, they retreated as far against the wall, as they could. The older girl pressed the small one with the bear close and protectively against her own body.
"You don't need to fear me," Malfoy said with a bloody persuasive regret. "I don't want to hurt you. But like I have told you already…." Malfoy indicated in Severus' direction, without leaving the children from the eyes. "He is a very bad demon and I cannot not resist him. Look at him. He hates children."
One of the girls, one with wild red curls began to cry violently and Malfoy pulled her into a gentle embrace. "Shhh, little one. I would never hurt you, but the demon is thirsty."
Severus observed with horror how Malfoy got a knife out of his robes. With the girl, he turned to face his prisoner and without any hesitation he sliced the knife in a fast movement across her neck.
Blood squirted, the other children screamed and Severus gasped in shock. Malfoy, however, calmly took a small bowl that Nott handed him and held at the girl's neck, catching a quantity of the blood that still flowed from the gruesome and deadly would.
Severus could only stare in shock and shake his head in denial, as the sightless, wide open eyes of the dead child burned into his brain.
After a while, Malfoy let the small, lifeless body fall to the ground and approached Severus, holding the scarlet squirted bowl in likewise blood-smeared hands. Then he held the bowl right in front of Severus' face. "You were thirsty. Now drink!"
"No... I can't... What have you...?" Severus' eyes moved from the bowl with blood in it to the small body lying on the ground, telling himself over and over that this couldn't be happening.
"Drink!" Malfoy ordered more sharply and Severus slowly shook his head. He'd rather die of thirst, than….
Malfoy turned to Nott, who grinned broadly, pulling a knife from his robes as well. He seized the arm of the older girl and jerked her away from the clasps of the smaller, still crying child. Without any fuss, he cut her throat too and let her fall to the ground.
"Debby!" the small girl yelled. Her teddy fell from forceless fingers and rolled over the stone ground as she bolted forward only to be intercepted by Nott, who held the struggling and crying child against his legs, holding the knife threateningly against her neck.
"Drink!" Malfoy ordered again and Severus reached with trembling hands for the bowl. If he refused then this child would die too. By his fault. They were here only because of him. They could still be playing somewhere, were it not for him and his struggle of will with Malfoy. He wanted to grasp the bowl, but his fingers didn't obey him. The wound made the use of his hands impossible, but he was certain that the fingers would not have obeyed him otherwise, as he was still under the shock. Malfoy helped him and led the bowl to his lips, while Severus did everything to it keep the reigning abhorrence, rage and fear under control.
As he swallowed the first mouthful of the blood he had to fight the urge not to instantly throw it up again. Malfoy wouldn't take that, and after the second swig, as he unwillingly started chucking up and tried not to choke, the blond Death Eater pointed his wand from Severus' throat down to his stomach and mumbled a curse in order to suppress the chuck-up reflex. Then he let his prisoner empty the bowl. Severus felt sick as hell again. The blood was still warm, had a metallic taste and he'd rather die, than to be forced into this.
Then it was over and the bowl disappeared from his lips.
Immediately, Severus sank to the ground with a whimper, pulling his legs close to his body, while he tried to ignore the metallic taste in his mouth. He felt sick and felt the need to retch but Lucius' curse prevented him from doing so.
Nott released the girl, who withdrew immediately into the corner with the boy, both sobbing and huddling closely together. Malfoy and Nott didn't even glance their way as they lifted the bodies of the two dead children, carried them out of the cell and closed the door behind themselves.
Severus listened to the sound of distress of the last two children and too began to cry soundlessly himself. If only he could be dead...
T.B.C.
Thanks to my wonderful Betas Slytherin's silver snake and Sadistra. Special Thanks to my good old friend Niara who helped me to translate this one paragraph that just wouldn't cooperate :-P
And of course a huge thank you to all those wonderful reviewers out there too.