I do not own Twilight or any of its' characters

BPOV

Chapter 31

Empathy and Kind Words

I woke up the next morning alone because it was one of those days where Edward and I were on opposite schedules. We did have one class together at noon, and that was my first class of the day. I glanced over at the radio, nine o'clock. I groaned and stumbled out of bed, and headed downstairs to start the day. I managed to get some schoolwork done over coffee and breakfast, pushing my time to the limit, if I waited another ten minutes, I would be late. I hurried up and got dressed and rushed out to the garage. I grumbled as I climbed into the escalade. Was this really necessary? I longed for my crappy old truck or at least for a ride in the familiar Volvo. I avoided driving this thing at all costs, but on some days, it was necessary.

I arrived at school a few minutes early and contemplated getting another cup of coffee, but decided against it. I entered the lecture hall, mentally preparing myself to endure an hour of biology. I really hated having to go to biology lab and lecture back to back two days in a row, but what choice did I have, the scheduling was very strict. I glanced around and found Edward sitting alone in the back of the room listening to his Mp3 player glancing over some notes. I made my way over to him, his serious face brightening up when he saw me.

"Good morning," he said taking off his headphones and moving his jacket for me to sit down.

"Good afternoon actually."

"It's afternoon to me, it's morning for you." He smirked.

"I hate night classes." I grumbled pulling my books out of my bag.

"Welcome to the glamorous life of being a freshman."

"This whole scheduling thing better improve soon or I'm dropping out." I warned as a piece of hair fell out of my ponytail. He reached over and stuck it behind my ear, letting his hand linger on my face for a moment.

"How did class go today with Chef?" I asked.

Edward dropped his hand and looked down at the table, "fine, he seemed fine today."

"Did he comment on your hand?" I asked, looking at the jagged line of sutures holding his finger together.

"No," he said uneasily.

"What's the matter?" I asked, furrowing my brow in concern.

"I suspect, but I can't confirm, that he may have seen something yesterday."

"When you cut yourself?"

"Yes. I was replaying everything in my mind today and I think he may have seen something, I can't be sure though."

"Let's not worry about that now. Besides, who would believe him if he told anyone?" I asked trying to reassure myself.

Edward opened his mouth to comment, when the professor started lecture. He stopped short and turned around to face the front of the room, and placed his hand on my thigh under the desk.

We didn't speak for the rest of the class, the lecture seemed like it was never ending today. I tapped my pen impatiently, staring at the clock, I felt antsy today. I hadn't even realized I was doing anything until Edward shot a hand out to the side of him and held my wrist still to stop the tapping. When class ended, Edward was headed to lunch and I was on my way to sociology. He walked me to class, kissed me softly on the cheek and departed. His day was nearly over and mine had just begun. I dragged myself into the classroom and sat down beside Danielle.

"Hey Creepy!" She said cheerfully. That was her nickname for me.

"Hey!" I said, instantly smiling. I had grown very close to Danielle in a short time and I welcomed the time we spent together.

"What's new and exciting?" She asked pulling out a binder and glancing down at her perfectly manicured purple nails.

"Not a whole lot. New color?" I asked gesturing at her nails.

"Oh yeah, do you like it? It's called puma purple."

"Love it." I said brightly.

"Bella, why don't you come with me sometime and get your nails done too? We could make a whole day thing of it, have a couple of drinks, get you good and saucy and then you could go home and scratch up Edward's back." She teased.

I snickered, a little embarrassed but amused none the less. "I don't know if he'd enjoy that."

"Don't be silly, of course he would!"

I smiled mischievously averting my eyes to the floor and then back up at Danielle, "Well, he might enjoy it a little."

"He seems like he has a bit of a dark side."

"You have no idea," I replied.

"Or, if you want, we could skip the nails and just have a couple of drinks and watch a movie." She said in a less silly tone.

"Yeah, that'd be great actually."

"Awesome, what's your schedule looking like?" She asked, excitement rising in her voice.

"It's pretty open. I don't have any plans for the weekend. As far as I know, I don't have any big projects or exams coming up."

"Do you want to come back to the dorm with me after class on Friday?"

"Sure, that sounds good. What do you want me to bring?"

Danielle flicked her hand carelessly to the side, "Bella, you don't have to bring anything you know that." I'd been to Danielle's dorm a few times. She was one of the fortunate ones who had a whole room to herself with a spare bed. Her original roommate was a no show this semester, so she was a single, living in a double. She was the type of person who liked her alone time, but loved to have company over, and when you came over, she wanted you to feel at home, even if it was just a dorm.

"Are you sure? Let me at least bring the movie."

"Fine, but no chick flicks."

"It's a deal."

The same day I made plans with Danielle, I got a phone call from Angela back in Forks. I wasn't able to answer my phone at the time and she had left me a message. She and Ben broke up. She was devastated, they were supposed to spend Spring break together in Florida, and now all that had changed. They were both very busy with school and their parents were piling the pressure on. They didn't have time to see one another except every few weeks and everything had become very strained and awkward between them. I felt my stomach curl into knots as I remembered how things had been between Edward and me before he left me. My heart ached for Angela as I listened to her small voice on the other end of the phone. Empathy overwhelmed me, and I quickly made it my business to call her back immediately.

"Hello?" Her voice sounded sad and tired.

"Angela?"

"Bella!" She exclaimed, perking up.

"Hi, I'm sorry I couldn't get to the phone when you called. I was in class." I explained.

"It's five o'clock, you're still in class? That sucks."

"Angela I have the worst schedule ever this semester."

"How's everything going out there in the wilds of Alaska?" She asked.

"Everything is fine out here. How are you doing? I'm so sorry to hear about you and Ben."

"Oh, that. Yeah, thanks. I don't know what went wrong, Bella. It's so awful, one moment we were fine, and the next, we were broken up." She said hoarsely. "What did you do when Edward…" her voice trailed off.

"I spent more time with my friends. Or at least I tried to. I don't think Jessica will ever forgive me for that one night we went out to the movies."

Angela laughed softly on the other end, "Yeah, I heard about that incident, I don't think she ever did forgive you for that one."

"So what are you going to do for Spring break now? You already bought your plane ticket didn't you?"

"Yeah, I spent like three hundred bucks, I can't get my money back either."

Suddenly, an idea popped into my head, "Angela, can you still exchange them?"

"I don't see why not, I mean, it's still like a month and a half away, why?"

"I know it's not Florida, it's nowhere close actually, but would you like to come out here for a few days?" I asked.

"To Alaska?" She asked, sounding a little confused.

"Sure, you should be around friends and away from Forks. You can stay with me and Edward."

"In the dorm?"

"No, we have a house," I started and then corrected myself, nineteen year olds did not own houses together, "Actually, it belongs to Dr. Cullen, we're just occupying it while we're in school."

"That's great Bella. Do you think Edward would mind?" She asked uneasily.

"No, of course not." I reassured her, I knew he wouldn't be bothered at all if she stayed with us for a few days, he liked Angela.

"I don't know, I feel like I'm imposing."

"Please Angela," I pleaded, "I'm not going to be able to get back to Forks until school is done for the year, and I really would love to have you out here with us."

"Weeel, okay." She said happily, "I'll have to check with my parents first though, but I don't think they'll mind. I'll probably be a lot safer with the two of you then I would in Florida with a bunch of drunken college students that I don't know."

"Naturally," I replied, "we're about as boring as you can get, we're in bed by ten."

"Oh, Bella, I have to get going, I promised my parents I'd meet them for dinner, but, let me talk to them and think about this a little and then I'll get back to you."

"Perfect." I replied.

"Okay then, I'll talk to you soon, and Bella, thanks."

"Anytime, and if you need to talk, ever, call me." I pressed. Something had me very worried about Angela. Without Ben, and the way her parents were, she had virtually no support system back in Forks, it made me homesick.

"I will."

By the time I was able to finally head home after finishing my classes, it was eight thirty, the drive home would take me twenty minutes. I couldn't get there fast enough, being alone with my thoughts at night was never a good thing. The sound of Angela's voice stayed with me, she sounded deadpan, like a robot almost, and it was all too familiar to me. As clearly as I could remember the first time I saw Edward, the first time he spoke to me, I could also remember the day he left me. I could remember every part of it, down to the finest detail as to what I was wearing, or what I had for breakfast that day. Panic started to overwhelm me as I relived the emptiness and darkness that I felt for all those months he was gone. Poor Angela, I wanted to fly back to Forks right now and hug her and tell her it was going to be alright. I wished that someone had done that for me, but then I remembered that someone had; Jacob. I wondered what he was up to right now, and then my thoughts immediately went back to Edward. I wondered if Jacob had seen anything unusual going on in Forks, I supposed if he had he or Alice would have called by now. I thought of my nightmare and what my life would be like without Edward in it. I shuddered as the horrible vision of the blood and Edward's head falling back came over me. Suddenly a completely irrational and urgent need to see him came over me.

Luckily, I was almost home, I raced the engine on the Cadillac and zipped down the street, finally, our driveway was in sights. I quickly parked in the garage and hastily got out of the driver seat, not even bothering to gather my things. I had a horrible feeling that I would get inside and for some reason he would be gone, gone forever, never to be seen again. The pit of my stomach churned and my heart began to beat wildly. This must be what a panic attack feels like I thought to myself. My chest tightened as I put my hand on the doorknob, I prepared myself for the worst.

I slowly turned the knob and opened the door and was immediately bombarded with the smell of prosciutto and garlic. Not good enough I thought, I needed to see him for myself in order to stop this horrible feeling from overtaking me. I walked into the kitchen and he wasn't there. Topaz sat on the counter and mewed at me happily. My eyes darted around the kitchen in search of him, nowhere; he was nowhere to be found.

"Edward?" I called, trying to maintain a steady tone. "Edward?" I asked, my voice rising fearfully this time.

He jogged into the kitchen, looking alarmed, "Bella?" I saw his face and practically collapsed into him. "What's the matter love?" I clung to him, on the verge of tears. He held me away from him and it nearly killed me. He studied my face, concern in his brilliant eyes. A few pieces of hair clung to my now clammy face, he frantically pushed them away. "Bella what's the matter?"

I stared at him and it finally sunk in that he was here, and he was real, my heartbeat slowed and the knots in my stomach unfurled. I grabbed at him until I was tucked safely in his arms. "Nothing, nothing. I just got scared for a minute. It's stupid, completely irrational." I muttered into his shoulder. "I didn't know where you were."

"I was just in the other room, changing a CD," he replied softly, kissing the top of my head. "You're shaking. What's wrong?"

"I don't know, I was fine, and then I just got really, panicked."

"Hang on; let me take the food off the stove." He said moving with me closer to the stove.

My heart raced again, "no! Don't let me go!" The words flew out of my mouth so quickly, I couldn't stop them. He must have thought I had lost my mind. I felt like I had.

"Bella, stop, it'll take one second." He let me go and with one rapid movement took the sauté pan off the burner. He immediately returned and wrapped his arms around me again. "Sh, sh, sh, it's alright," He murmured, rocking me a little.

"I don't know what's happening to me." I whispered into his shoulder.

"Calm down, everything is fine. I think you're having an anxiety attack." His voice was low and soothing and I could smell his scent underneath all of the garlic and prosciutto cooking. "What brought this on?" he asked, trying to get to the bottom of my angst.

"I don't know."

"What did you do today?" he asked, still keeping his voice low and calm.

"I went to class, saw you, went to my next class, made plans with Danielle, went to a few more classes, ate lunch, and then, Angela called." Then I remembered, "She and Ben broke up." I explained as he rubbed circles against my back.

"She asked me what I did when you…" my voice trailed off, "and then I thought about…and then I just, fell apart."

"Oh Bella," he said softly, "I'm so sorry."

I was starting to calm down, "please don't apologize," I said pulling away from him, "there's nothing to be sorry about."

"Aside from the fact that memories of the biggest mistake of my life are now giving you anxiety attacks." He said miserably.

"No, it wasn't that. It was something else; I know it wasn't that, it came on so suddenly, I just, had an urgent need to be home, and to see you. I feel better now though, how did you know what to do?"

"I didn't really do anything."

"No, you did, you distracted me. How did you know that was what needed to be done?" I questioned.

I watched his face, he furrowed his brow in concentration, and opened his mouth to speak, but then hesitated, his face was a mask of confusion, "I think I can remember my mother having anxiety attacks on occasion." He looked over at me, bewildered, as if he had no idea where that thought had come from, "I think I can remember my father doing the same for her. Talking about her day until she was so occupied telling him about it that it calmed her enough to stop the panic. I've also seen Jasper do the same for Alice when her visions become too strong."

When he said that, I remembered seeing the same once before, Alice's vision had changed, and she had to draw what she was seeing. I remember seeing Jasper hurry to her side and start talking to her about what she was seeing, trying to keep her calm. "So that was an anxiety attack?" I asked.

"I think so," he said cautiously.

"Great, I hope this isn't going to become a frequent occurrence."

"It happens to everyone at least once in a lifetime, studies have proved it. Now you'll know what to do when it happens to me." He smiled his crooked smile that I adored and rubbed my arms briskly. "Are you alright now?"

"I think so."

"Good." He stared at me for a moment more to be sure and then returned to the stove, he turned the gas back on and resumed sautéing, tossing the prosciutto and garlic lightly in the pan. He set the pan back down and added a plate of cut up chicken breasts to the mix.

"What are you making?" I asked, suddenly remembering how hungry I was.

"Our February project requires us to create a sautéed dish for part of our final, so, I'm testing out a few things ahead of time."

"What's in it?" I asked peeking over his shoulder.

"Prosciutto, garlic, red pepper flakes, boneless chicken, olive oil, and shredded up golden beets, served over pasta." He said raising an eyebrow as some of the olive oil popped and got on his shirt.

"That sounds fantastic." I said, breathing in the savory aroma that filled the kitchen.

"We'll see," he said skeptically as he tossed the contents of the pan once more.

"When's it going to be done?" I asked.

"About ten minutes or so."

"I'll pour drinks." I offered. "Spring break is coming up in a month or so." I started, pulling two glasses out of the cupboard.

"Yes it is. Did you want to go somewhere?"

"Not exactly, did you have anything planned?"

"No, but it's not too late if you wanted to do something." He answered back, not looking up from his pan.

"I was actually hoping that we could have company." I said opening up a new container of milk.

Edward glanced over his shoulder at me quizzically, "who?"

"Angela." I said quietly.

"Whatever you want love, that's fine." He said carelessly.

"Are you sure you don't mind? I know I just kind of put you on the spot."

"No, really Bella, it's fine. It'd be nice for someone to come see us for a change. Maybe Alice and Jasper would want to visit as well."

"Do you think?" I asked brightly.

"Sure, I'll call them tomorrow." I heard a clicking sound as Edward turned off the stove, removing his concoction from the burner and tossing it with the pasta he had prepared. He fixed a plate and placed it in front of me topping it with parmesan cheese. "Now, tell me what you think, honestly."

"You're making me your guinea pig?" I teased.

"Of course," he scoffed with a smirk.

"More cheese please," I bargained before digging in. He rolled his eyes and grated me another small pile over my food. "Oh my God, this is fantastic." I said halfway through my bite.

His eyes brightened up as he sat up straighter in his chair, "Really? It came out alright?" he asked in disbelief.

I nodded eagerly and took another bite, "really Edward, this is delicious." He didn't respond, but I swore I saw him puff out his chest slightly.