AHO~~~IIIIIYYY Minna-san! I know this chapter is shorter than normal, but I don't think Evan could take much more insanity. SO! Enjoy this reallllllyyyy insane acid trip and tell me how you think I did~!
Acknowledgments below~!
(Evan's P.O.V.)
"What…?" I coughed, eyes twitching from the effort of staying open.
Smooth Eve, smooth.
"Who...Who are you..?" I swallowed past the lump in my throat, feeling the blade tickle my skin once more.
"Well, I'd be lying if I said I'm no one of consequence. Since I am here to kill you and all. Yajahahahaha~" The man chuckled, his voice upbeat and cheerful as the blade stayed unwavering from its position by my neck.
My lips twitched soundlessly as I tried to form a response, my brain running a mile a minute.
What did he mean by "Rabbit-chan?" Who is he? What does he look like? How did he find me? Why does he act like he knows something about me that I don't know? Who is he and WHAT IS HE DOING HERE?!
Instead of getting scared, I got frustrated. This wasn't how this arc was supposed to go! WHO DOES THIS CLOWN THINK HE IS?!
Just as I opened my mouth to shoot off a sour reply, Luffy beat me to the punch. Literally.
"GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY NAKAMA, YOU JERK!" Luffy roared, his fist stretching and smashing into the mystery man's face. I expected him to go flying, and as I rolled over onto my side it certainly looked like he did, but…
Did he just...Jump backwards into the wall...To make it look like he was pushed backwards?!
I felt Puuya stiffen in realization, but I paid him no mind for my eyes were still wide open in shock.
"What...The heck.. A Furry? I thought I already took care of one of those…" I mumbled to myself in my slightly delirious state. (I had a minor concussion!)
N-No Boss-san that's..!
My vision finally fell into focus and I got a good look at the man who looked unfazed in the slightest as he dusted rubble off of his muscled shoulders. He had burnt-caramel colored skin, and well-toned muscles that were in obvious view from underneath his open crimson vest, not dissimilar to Luffy's. His eyebrows were strange, like a pair of cut up rectangles that moved in an arch as his expressions changed. His hair was a stark bright blonde in contrast to his darker, tanned skin. It was fuzzy and short, close to his head much like Doflamingo's, though he had two delicate braids hanging from his left temple. The braids were held together at the roots with a pair of large blue beads, adorned with an exotic blue peacock feather, and a purple peacock feather. His eyes were an odd yellow color, neon mustard. I decided. The man was wearing the aforementioned crimson vest with the word "criminl" written across the chest, a classic red fez, and puffy orange parachute pants. (The pants were smaller to and less ridiculous than Enel's, but of the same type of clothing.) He wore a pair of simple geta sandals and weilded an average cutlass with nothing remarkable about it.
Like he just picked it up on the way over here...Who is this joker?
But his attire was far from the strangest thing about the mystery-man.
He had a tail.
He had a tail and monkey ears.
I rubbed at my eyes, sitting up and blinking rapidly. The furry light orange tail and ears were still there.
"What the heck?" I saw my confusion mirrored on the faces around me, the Krieg Pirates not included. They were positively elated.
"It's Gin and Lee-sama! We'll win for sure!" They cheered, grins breaking out all around.
My face was still a mask of confusion, and apparently "Lee-sama" found that very funny.
"Yajhahahaha~ You seem a little star-struck little Rabbit-chan~ Am I really that amazing?" The man now known as Lee chuckled, kicking the cutlass from the ground and into his left-hand's grip.
Eep! Boss-san we need to run, now!
But who is he? And what do you mean run?
That's the Monkey!
Yes I can see he's a monkey, but who is he?
No! Not "a monkey", THE Monkey! He's the living embodiment of the Zodiac Monkey!
Okay, so, that's like...One out of a hundred questions answered. Question number two: WHY THE HECK IS HE TRYING TO KILL ME?!
I-I E-Er..U-Um..!
It seems I had unintentionally annoyed him by accidentally ignoring him as I talked to Puuya. At least, that's the conclusion I came to as I hung from his grip around my throat in the air. He wasn't necessarily choking me, but it wasn't a comfortable angle. My hands automatically sprang to his hand around my neck, but his grip was stronger than titanium. This man was way out of Luffy's league.
I need to get him away from the others so the story can progress!
"Pay more attention Rabbit-chan~" He whined slightly, frowning. "It's rude to ignore someone you just met!"
I gave him a wry grin, my eyes the only thing betraying the throbbing in my head. "I'll remember that the next time someone gives me a minor concussion and puts a sword to my neck."
"My punch didn't do a thing…! Evan!" I heard Luffy call worriedly behind me. "That guy's dangerous!"
I chuckled, before a few short laughs cascaded from my mouth. "No shiz! I had no idea! S'okay Cap'n! I'll fight my own battles, you fight yours!" I called over my shoulder, feeling Lee's eyes burning a hole in the back of my skull. I turned around and met his curious gaze with a quizzical one of my own. "What? Is my face so devilishly handsome that you've fallen for me?" I mocked him. I saw a flash of amusement in his eyes as he grinned.
"Fine~, We'll fight elsewhere~! Wouldn't want to have to kill Luffy-sama, no?" He chirped, suddenly switching his grip to the nape of my neck and before I could blink we were on the back deck of the Baratie.
I fell forward as he released his grip on me, and my body moved without me telling it to. I put out one hand and spun around on it, swinging my feet under me as I straightened in one smooth motion. I looked just as surprised as I felt. "Guess that's what 'AGL' does." I mumbled half-heartedly to myself, grinning despite the situation.
I straightened, my eyes narrowing slightly and a firm frown set on my face. "So remind me again why someone I just 'met' is trying to kill me?"
Lee quirked his lips into a smirk, spinning the cutlass around in his hands rapidly as if it were child's play. "If you survive, I'll tell you." He said, suddenly lunging at me and barely giving me any reaction time.
"WHOA!" He was WAY faster than Kuro! My instincts were the only thing stopping the cutlass from turning me into sashimi. I constantly brought my arms up, my blades sparking from the speed of his relentless slashes. I was fighting a losing battle, my energy was already waning from the effort of diverting his slashes. I couldn't take his hits head on - he was much too strong, my blades would break.
But I had to try, I was not willing to die.
Duck, block, roll to the side, jump, block, block, slash, block, roll forwards, duck, block, leap back, I was helpless. I went where he coaxed me with his sword. I grit my teeth in frustration, leaping backwards once more, my eyes widening as I realized the ocean was right behind me, lapping eagerly at my heels. Lee's lazy posture hadn't changed the entire time- he was toying with me.
Lee lazily stood with the sword levelled at my neck, inches away from ending my life. He almost seemed disappointed. "I honestly thought you'd last longer Rabbit-chan. Oh no fun~" He sighed. Time seemed to slow as I felt renewed energy flow through my veins.
Puuya had snapped out of it and kicked it into gear.
Somebody ask for an adrenaline shot?
FINALLY!
My leg muscles tensed just as his wrist muscles did, the cutlass starting its motion towards my neck. I jumped.
No, I don't think you get it, I JUMPED. High, like, super high. Clear over his head and onto the boards behind him kind of high.
There were no words for how awesome that felt.
"HECK-YEAH!"
Oh, I guess there are.
I ducked suddenly, hearing the 'whoosh' of the blade narrowly missing my head as I did so. A cold feeling settled in my stomach and my body shivered with fear, the idea of death just now setting in.
CAN YOU BE ANY SLOWER?!
SHUT UP AND HELP ME RUN!
I blinked at his mildly surprised expression, and then I spun around and ran as if the devil himself was on my heels. I hissed as I felt him nick my left calf teasingly, blood dripping onto the floorboards. I ran past a closed door, flinging it open and diving inside, leaping over the island as I found myself in the kitchen.
Full of sharp things.
Like knives.
Lots of knives.
I ducked as one of them impaled themselves into the boards above my head. I grabbed the closest thing on my right and threw it at him, already reaching for something else. He laughed as he ducked under the bronze pot and easily swatted away the plastic cutting board I threw at him.
"Rabbit-chan this is really pathetic-" He ducked underneath a barrage of forks and spoons, a ladle thwacking against the wall behind him. His smirk twitched slightly in annoyance, his eyes becoming hard. "Rabbit-chan you're just delaying the inevitable."
I nodded in agreement, to his surprise. "Agreed, but you've got to admit, I'm pretty darn good at it eh?" I chucked a cleaver at him, hitting the wall by his head. He didn't even flinch. I gulped, chewing nervously at my bottom lip as he continued to stride forward carelessly. My eyes searched the kitchen desperately for anything, anything at all that could help me live if even for just a moment longer. My eyes landed on two pot lids and my frown turned into a wicked grin.
"Eh?~ Find something to continue this game a little longer Rabbit-chan?~" I flung a knife at him as I lunged for the lids, my hands closing around the handles as I straightened with a triumphant smirk. "I'm getting bored~" He frowned, raising an eyebrow as he waited oh so patiently for me.
I just rolled my eyes and cut the strap holding on of the shelves onto the wall, sending a few pots tumbling onto him. I jumped over him once more, bolting up the stairs behind him and down the hall. I felt him running easily behind me, sometimes cutting the wall just behind me as if to urge me forward. The small cuts on my body from when I hadn't been able to block earlier stung as I ran up the second flight of stairs and burst through a door. I skidded to a halt as I nearly fell over the railing. We were on the third-story roof.
I spun around to race back inside to try to find a window, but I couldn't take a step as the cutlass tickled my throat.
There goes that plan out the window. Now I just look like an idiot holding lids.
"Ah, no where left to run now eh?~ Well, at least I had more fun than I thought I would.~" He mused, tilting his head to one side as if to look at me from a different angle. A thought seemed to strike him as his jaw tensed momentarily before he suddenly shot me a question. "How old are you, Rabbit-chan?"
WHAT.
"My age?" I asked incredulously, eyes wide with confusion and fear.
He nodded impatiently, sighing in annoyance. "Yes, your age, how old are you?"
I gulped past the knot in my throat, hardening my gaze with determination.
I won't let Luffy see me be afraid before I die.
"I'm fourteen."
His eyes widened comically, he actually stumbled backwards, shock etched into every fiber of his being. "What?"
Now it was my turn to be confused. "I'm fourteen." I said slowly, in case he didn't hear right.
What's the big deal? Wasn't he going to kill me a few seconds ago?
Fury erupted onto his face, though I had a feeling none of it was directed at me. Suddenly he grabbed my shoulders roughly and made my position against the railing all the more uncomfortable. "How long? How long you been here?!"
I was at a loss for words, my brain running a mile a minute to try to comprehend anything that's going on. "What?"
He shook me slightly, his eyes piercing mine intently. "How long since you woke up here?"
"I-I-E-Er um, about a week or two?" I stuttered, utterly bewildered as his eyes widened even more before he released me and whistled in surprise.
"Not bad, considering ya' just got here and all.~ Yajhahahahaha~! How interesting.." He muttered to himself, assuming a thoughtful pose, the cutlass forgotten by his feet.
A jolt went through my body as my mind finally pieced things together.
"Wouldn't want to have to kill Luffy-sama no?"
"to kill Luffy-sama no?"
"Luffy-sama"
"Luffy-sama"
"Y-You're from my world!" I blurted out suddenly, pointing at him in surprise. He gave me a condescending look.
"No, really? You're slow, for a rabbit." My eye twitched in irritation, no longer feeling like he wanted to kill me.
"What the heck are you doing here?!" I choked out in my surprise.
He sighed, leaning against the wall of the Baratie as he rubbed at his forehead with a hand.
"Well, how to put this simply...You aren't the only 'Host' here. In fact, there are ten others like us."
"Us'? I dunno if you noticed, but I do not have a tail." A sinking feeling permeated my gut, my fingers started to twitch in nervousness, fearing what was to come.
He waved my words off carelessly, continuing his explanation. "Just listen to me, you'll thank me later. You're in a lot of danger Rabbit-chan. You're very lucky that I found you first, the younger ones are a lot more...Careless."
"YOU NEARLY KILLED ME NOT FIVE MINUTES AGO YOU BI-POLAR FREAK OF NATURE!" I yelled at him, the panic and fear I was hiding in my eyes now prominent in my frightened expression.
I was expecting a lot of things to happen after my outburst.
I did not expect him to hug me.
"I'm so sorry Rabbit-chan, I'm so, so sorry you are here. Life is cruel to the kindest and kind to the worst of us. I promise you, I'll never hurt you again. You shouldn't...You shouldn't have to be here…" He grit out in frustration, hugging me tightly as I stayed rigid with shock.
I think my brain just melted.
I gratefully fell into the warm darkness as I fell unconscious.
…
Nope! You're still awake!
I hate you.
"U-Um..I-I think you're breaking my ribs!" I croaked out, falling to my knees as he let go, muttering apologies.
He suddenly clapped his hands in a decisive manner. "Right! That's what I'll do~! I'll get in trouble today and not kill you!~ I like you Rabbit-chan, so I won't kill you, okay?~ The odds are against you Rabbit-chan! Will you be able to survive?~ Well, we shall see~!" He chuckled, poking the middle of my forehead playfully as I stared at him uncomprehendingly. He waved over his shoulder as he walked to the end of the railing. "See you soon my little Rabbit-chan!~ Yajahahahahahaha~!" He jumped off, and escaped my view.
…
I'm still holding pot lids…
I couldn't handle it anymore, I fell forward and lost consciousness with a soft whimper.
A/N:
BAM! Out like a light yeah?~ Heheheh XD I'm so mean~!
Please don't forget to review! I would really like to know how I did with the fighting scenes X3 (If you can even call them that.)
Acknowledgements~!:
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Until next time then, Ciaossu Minna~