A/N: I'm not dead I promise. I know it's been forever since I've updated but I have no excuse. Sorry for the wait. Thank you for all the follows, favs and reviews. Please keep them coming! Reviews, favs and follows give me inspiration to write, write and WRITE MOAR. So REVIEW! Also I enjoy your inputs.
What do you want from this story? Action, more romance? Tell it to me straight and I'll see what I can do. This by the way is a slow build up story. Sorry short story reading people. :C
Review responses: Want me to respond to your review? Let me know! Ask a question, start a slight conversation in the review. I love responding to your thoughts and ideas!
CatGirlFireFlare: Thank you for the best wishes! and review in general dove! I'm glad you caught the laser weasel reference there X3, had to have some out of the box fun in referencing. I'm glad you felt the affect of the Tallest's cruelty, as I was really trying hard to set a darker mood to this story. It won't be a happy go lucky one to say the least. You're welcome for the review response, the pleasure is all mine to talk to such extraordinary people :3.
Wolfmoonsshadow: Darling you are asking ALL the right questions. I won't reveal anything now since I love seeing the full effect through writing and your reactions but I hope you stick around with the book long enough to find your answers! ;)
Guest: Thank you very much for your kind words. I did not let my cancer beat me and I am free now thank god. If you ever need someone to console in for your own misgivings, I promise to keep an open ear. I'm not the best at responding right away-lol just ask AndyH-but I will respond. I promise. Authors promise.
Last responses at the bottom!
Deathwish1234
Three days…Three days of awkward glances, simple words and vague body language. That was Zim and Gaz's relationship at the moment. Neither Dib nor anyone else knew what had happened between them and to be honest, they weren't all that sure themselves. Any time Gaz tried to approach Zim he would quickly change his route around the school and take a long back alley to his next class. It was starting to irritate her. However she had to admit she was no better, anytime she spotted Zim looking at her, she turned her back to him and acted as if she didn't know.
What exactly had happened, had been a blur. Gaz remembered the emotional moment of weakness Zim had and remembered trying to comfort him but she didn't remember when exactly she had left him or what their last words to each other were. All she remembered was the uneasy feeling of awkwardness.
Constantly, she tried to tell herself she didn't care, she kept Zim from an untimely demise, and her own personal mission was over right? Wrong. Zim stopped talking completely at school. Before he was annoying and everyone-especially Gaz-wanted to cram a pumpkin filled with acid down his throat so he could choke on it. But now, he just sat in each class, staring at the desk and muttering a quick 'I don't know' every time a teacher pestered him with a question. As much as Gaz wanted to enjoy the new perk she had to remember one thing.
This was not Zim.
This was a quick, jaw snapping change that was unexpected and completely out of character for him. When Dib tried to pick on him, he just let it happen. There was no aggression, no trying to be top dog, no nothing. It was almost like Zim's mind had been replaced with a machine that just made him do things that were mandatory for living, nothing else.
Hell, Gaz hadn't even seen a malevolent smirk come from the interstellar traveler since before he found out that he was to be demoted. To say the change disturbed her was an understatement. The truth in the matter was that she was terrified of what exactly was going through his head. He was upset, and people-no matter alien or human-make irrational decisions when they're upset. They debate things that should never be debated by such a young mind and do things twice as bad as what their thoughts provided them images with.
Today had proved to be even worse for Gaz's findings. She had gone out of school during class to avoid her former self and distract her some more. Instead she had found Zim sitting up on the roof of the building holding a pack of cigarettes. Where he'd gotten them was unknown to Gaz, but it concerned her. It meant that Zim was turning to other things and substances to distract from the thoughts and feelings of pain, loneliness and rejection.
She watched him for a moment and felt a tidal wave of relief when Zim tossed the unopened pack across the school yard and punched an air vent instead, cussing loudly when he realized that hitting solid things DID in fact hurt. Though his defense mechanism of displacement was not the best solution, it was better than destroying his body just to forget.
Now Gaz sat on the concrete pillar right outside of school, listening to all the grueling subjects flood out the barely hinged doors. It was the end of the day and everyone was excited to get home and watch some ridiculous show, most likely the angry monkey show or another soap opera. It was the one person who wouldn't be excited that she was looking for.
He was easy to spot, not just because his skin stuck out compared to everyone else. But he also had a certain air around him, a strut if anything the possessed some pride even if he felt down in the dumps. 'There.' She thought to herself, seeing a red and black striped sweatshirt and green skin trotting down the oil slicked steps that lead away from the school.
Gaz said nothing as she stood up, brushed off her dark clothing, stormed over to him, snatched him by the hood of his sweat shirt and drug him behind a corner of the school building. Surprisingly he didn't put up much of a fight once he realized it was Gaz assaulting him. "Let's not," He growled, grabbing her wrist and yanking it off his hood. Once free from her death grip, he tried to escape again, but Gaz wasn't about to let him.
She snatched one of his belt loops and yanked him back, nearly causing him to topple over in the process, "What Gaz human I am a very busy person!"
"No you're not; don't even try that on me." She growled back, making his open mouth close without a retort. "You've been avoiding me."
"No I haven't, I'm simply been ignoring you, but don't worry, the avoiding will commence later."
"And just why have you been avoiding me Zim?" She grumbled, rolling her eyes at how ridiculous and petty he could be sometime. He seemed to think about what he could say that would be a good response but it took a long time to think of an acceptable excuse and the momentary silence was bothering Gaz, "Well?"
"No reason."
"Yeah right."
"And why is it that you suddenly care Gaz?" He challenged, hoping to flip the script a bit.
"I just wanted to make sure you were okay."
"That isn't like you. You are out of character, whatever spell your hippo headed brother casted upon you, I cannot help you undo."
"I'm not here asking for your help. I'm here offering my help to you."
"I don't remember asking for it."
"You didn't, but you're getting it so suck it up pretty boy."
"I am not pretty."
"It's an expression Zim. And you're getting off topic." Gaz hissed back. Zim looked distressed and seemed to be growing more and more irritated as their conversation continued on.
"What could a human possibly help me with?"
"You're emotions."
"My what?"
"Please, you have hardly spoken a word to anyone for three days. Are you feeling kinda cold and heavy inside right now?" His silence answered her question, "it's okay to feel that way."
"Maybe within your species." Zim grumbled, glancing away and furrowing his brow. This was obviously a sensitive topic to him.
"And yours too, I'm gonna teach you how this girl deals with them."
"By bashing small children's skulls in with a rusty spoon of doom?" Gaz gave him a look.
"I may love destruction, but that doesn't mean I don't know how to be a girl. Ever heard of stress eating Zim?"
"Only that it's bad for you."
"Those bean stalks only say that because they don't know what their missing. Come on, were going to go to bloaties and I'm going to show you, the best way to get out a feeling."
"Other than doom."
"Yes Zim, other than doom." He huffed and crossed his arms, staring at her for a moment before growling to himself and turning his face away.
"I'm not exactly in the mood to be going to an outing little Gaz."
"Fine, we'll order out. Your house or mine?" She asked, popping her cell out of her black back pack and flipping it open. Yes, she still had a primitive flip phone compared to the smart phones roaming the world, consuming the human mind with pointless games, apps and texts. Or as some would say, she had a 'stupid phone' for a smart phone had many more perks that came with it.
Zim seemed unsure about either decision. If he chose Gaz's base, he would most definitely have to deal with the Dib beast and feel uncomfortable let alone exposed to the naked eye. However if he selected his base to consume fatty foods and rant at, he'd have to feel the hollowness of it. How damp and depressing it felt. It was a feeling that really hadn't left him alone since his demotion. "Zim is unsure which to choose. Will the Dib be home?"
"Yes he will. How about this, we can order out and head to your base to stress eat, then if you're not happy there we can find some other place to go." Gaz offered. It was an acceptable arrangement but Zim was still unsure about Gaz's intentions. She just randomly decided to enter his life, destroy it, then try to rebuild it all in the course of a few days, mere hours to the depressed Irken. It was like a roller coaster that ended without tracks to run on. A confusing spiral stair case with no railing and oil on each step. A downhill slide to be frank.
He could sense that Gaz was getting annoyed with his lack of response, but he was literally lost within his mind. All he felt he wanted was to be left alone to sulk on his own and think over his options in the situation. Things the Tallest had said to him stung and burned like fire fueled with gasoline. A smoldering heap of judgment and denial. "Gaz," He muttered weakly, catching Gaz's shocked focus, "I really just want to be left alone. You and I are nothing alike, and my problems are not yours. My burdens are mine alone and I will bear them as I see fit. Right now, Zim does not feel like sharing the weight of the world."
Surprised to find an arm linked with his, Zim looked down at Gaz in curiosity and discomfort. "I know that's what you think you want Zim. But being alone isn't going to help you. I think this will be good for the both of us. Will you trust me, just this once?" He stared at her for a moment, almost feeling at ease around her before he gave off a curt nod and glanced down.
A hop, skip and leap later and the pair was slowly walking back toward Zim's base with a large pepperoni and cheese pizza in tow. Stiflingly, their arms were still linked. Zim's hand was steadily shoved into his coat pocket and Gaz's hand was hooked around her belt loops. The contact wasn't appreciated, but it wasn't bad either. At least not to Zim. He simple gesture told him that Gaz felt comfortable around him and dare I say it enjoyed his company, but the fact that he didn't pull away meant he felt the same correct? 'No,' Zim thought to himself, biting his tongue, 'She just feels pity toward me, I don't need her nor do I need her help. I should just tell her to leave my presence and never to return. Her persistence is keeping me from making my decisions.'
"Is your base locked?" Gaz's question startled him awake from his thoughts, and he quickly frowned and growled internally to himself. He was much too at ease around this female and it was not supposed to be that way. Only one other time had he ever felt completely at ease around a female but that was years ago and completely irrelevant to his life now.
"No, with all the updates and systems shut down my base can no longer defend itself properly. There are no longer locks on anything." He hesitantly said. Little did Gaz know that no locks also meant all his personal information was unlocked as well. A quick scan of his computer would tell her everything about himself and that alone made his comfort level drop once more.
"Alright," She responded. They had arrived in Zim's drive way now and Gaz quickly became aware of the way Zim suddenly started lagging and almost dragging her back, "Are you okay?"
"Fine." He muttered curtly, staring at the dark windows and dull items he could see through the window.
He reluctantly let her in and entered himself, glancing around embarrassedly. He'd forgotten about a tantrum he'd had the night before and the base hadn't cleaned itself since. "What hurricane passed through here?"
Zim chose not to answer and merely shrugged, thinking of a better place to 'stress eat'. "Why don't we go to my personal quarters to 'rant' as you humans say? Most of the base is um…dysfunctional right now."
"Wanna talk about it?"
"I have no words to say, so no." He responded, pounding on a certain wall and stepping back as the wall slid back and reveled a dark stair case. As Zim stepped down onto each step, Gaz noticed that the panes lit up with a bright pink Irken symbol. As if to light the way. It was neat to say the least. "Coming human?"
"Yeah, neat stairs," She mentioned. It sounded as if she didn't care, but she really was intrigued by technology. It had always made her curious.
Zim merely scoffed and continued down the way, clapping his hands twice. This caused a reaction in crystals that clearly weren't from earth to light up and glow brightly different colors, giving his whole room a purplish hue. "What are those?"
"Light crystals, they respond to sound and absorb sound waves, the waves cause a certain chemical in them to vibrate and as the molecules rub together, they create friction, this creates heat, which initially causes these rocks to glow. There are different sound waves hitting different crystals, if there is a different level of friction, the color changes. You will notice this over time today. It can grow to be irritating, or calming."
"What about when you're silent?"
"Breathing makes noise, but if I am to rest then my antenna create a sound scrambler thus causing the waves to not reach the crystals. No waves, no light. Simple as that."
"That's crazy, where did you find them?"
"I did not find these Gaz, I created them. I initially made them to produce a sound which could put me at ease every night but a mess up of chemicals and time and this happened. Similar natural made crystals exist throughout the galaxy, but these were the first Irken made as far as I'm concerned."
"Wicked."
"Quite," He responded, continuing on to a dimly lit bed with black comforters, blood red sheets and a light blue Irken stamp on each of the materials. Gaz glanced up at the roof to see that it produced an image of space, stars, Zim's home planet, seemingly anything that comforted him. These shots were reflected on the silky black covers that frosted over Zim's bed. Under a misplaced pillow laid a dark red computer with the black Irken insignia on its cover. The bed itself was massive, like massive massive. It took up a whole wall. The most interesting thing about it was that around it hung thousands of pictures. Mainly of Zim, plenty of he and gir, a few of him on his home planet with other Irkens, a few of Dib in certain cells from his previous plans and a lot of just scenery.
Gaz felt that she was actually getting to see a bit of Zim's softer side within his room. "I find your room to be ironic. I'd expect you to have a whole army of guns and weapons in your room. But instead you chose memories?"
"Not exactly," He shrugged, saying something in his native language. A bar dropped from the ceiling, containing multiple guns, plans and anything that could cause destruction. "I can be a very paranoid person."
"You don't say?" She replied sarcastically, "Can those screens above your bed play other things like Tv and more importantly games?"
"Yes, but I prefer them not too, I keep important things on those screens."
"Well you must want to play a game once a while, either way I know two pizzas that are dying to be eaten right now and I am so not waiting up for you to get your act together." Zim gave her a sassy look as she continued on to the greasy boxes and popped the peperoni box open.
"Keep your inferior self over there for a moment. Zim wishes to get into more comfortable attire." Gaz rolled her eyes but kept her focus on the food until Zim said she could look again.
He didn't look much different. His pants were just baggier and his shirt had long sleeves and no gloves shockingly enough. "Want food?"
"I suppose I can try to indulge myself in this stress eating act." He muttered, opening the cheese box and glancing at it uneasily. "I don't trust human food."
"But you can trust me right? It's safe, I promise, your race eats junk food all the time. That's what this is." Zim glanced at her for a moment before debating if he truly trusted the human or not. He however hesitantly reached out and plucked a piece out of the box, blaming it on hunger, not trust. It's been a while since he had actually ingested something to keep his body going.
Cautiously, he sneaked a bite of the pizza and waited for searing pain. None came and though it wasn't the most delightful thing in the world, he did like the slightly spicy after taste the sauce put off. "Like it?" Gaz asked him. He shot her a look and huffed.
"It's acceptable for the occasion." He retorted, trying to keep some pride left in him.
"Whatever. Now onto the good part."
"Good part?"
"The talking." Zim stared at her for a moment before taking another large bite of pizza to distract her from the subject. Invaders did not merely speak of how they felt or what their reactions to a particular situation were.
"Don't even try to get out of it. You are gonna spill your guts in one way or another boy." Zim gulped, feeling his guard raise again.
At this point a slightly good feeling came over him.
He had an internal guard. It was up because of Gaz and her persistence.
She made him feel normal again.
A/N: Sorry for the OOCness. I enjoyed this chapter though. I do have a smart phone, and am not trying to critisize either side of the phone world ;). What do you guys think? Please review and let me know!
Last review responses:
AndyH: XD thank you darlin'! Enjoy the hearts and burning pumpkins I am sending your way for Halloween! XD. I need to respond to the PM. Sorry I am such a lazy procrastinator! I'll get back to you soon, I promise! Hope you're having a fantabulous day!
Tigersfury: HAHAHA mannnn I don't know ya. But I love ya! X3 You're awesome! I'll stay in rage mode with you for a while, but we can plot the Tallest's demise together yea? LOl.
sensei009: HAHAHA Oh my goodness gracious! I'm sorry for making you cry! Many hugs! Here's the next chapter for you! And thanks a bunch for the review! I love it! Your words made my day! It made me laugh like a maniac in public! hahaha!
QUOTE OF THE DAY: My gay bestie and I made this up Ahem "Single...and not so sure how to mingle" LOL. love ya princy~
NOT DEAD I SWEAR. Deathwish1234 X3 IRONY.