Mean Girls For Old Bitches

All of the usual snobs were arriving fashionably late as Mercedes and Quinn greeted them. Everyone stuck with the theme of all white dress and upon entering were given fine white wine. For good measure, with her parents, Mercedes invited Blaine along as one of her friends. Having parents who put funds into Dalton and a hometown celebrity as a sibling made him amongst the "type" that she should be friends with. Her father was Dalton alumni and her mother was a ridiculously superficial social butterfly.
She and Quinn HATED when either of their parents had a party. When they were younger, Mercedes hated them, more - as she always felt that she had to pretend to be better than she was, but she would have Quinn's skinny bitch ass there to point out all of her flaws while their snooty mothers tried to parade them and insult the opposite. Mercedes usually ended up feeling like the lowest dirt.

Mrs. Jones RELISHED in the fact that Quinn had a teenage pregnancy. She was nothing but generous to Quinn when she lived there, but now - it was always one of her tickets when doing the 'who's better' dance with Judy Fabray. That shit was simply annoying to both Mercedes and Quinn, now. "They're just too old for that," Quinn said when she saw the two women giggling together, knowing that within an hour or less, they would use honey sweet tones to go at each other's throats.

"It's like Mean Girls for old bitches..." Mercedes agreed and she and Quinn began to giggle together. Mercedes stopped when she saw Sam coming up, with Blaine. "What. The. Hell..." Blaine had obviously dressed Sam. He looked absolutely delicious, but... what was he doing here?
Quinn looked to see Sam and shook her head, "This is not good," she said.
When the two came to the door, Sam tried to kiss Mercedes, but she shied from the contact and gave him a cordial hug, "I didn't intend to see you here," she told him.
"I didn't expect you to invite one of my best friends... who you met through me, and NOT invite me," she said.
Quinn said sternly, "You don't understand how this works..."
"Mercedes, Quinn... I hope that you don't intend to linger with the guests in the doorway. It's rude. Invite them inside, already and since neither of these young men are familiar to me, I suppose that they're your guests," Mrs. Jones said, with a brilliant smile.
Mercedes quickly clarified, "This is my friend, Blaine Anderson, son of Akina and Hector Anderson, and his best friend, Sam."
Quinn added, "Who is also a friend of ours."
Mercedes said, "Yes - he's a friend, too. I didn't know he was coming, but the more the merrier. Merry Christmas in July!" She cheered and reached for a glass of wine of her own to gulp down. Mrs. Jones' eyes studied Sam... odd for her, because Blaine had been pointed out as the 'worthy' one, and she was all about ignoring nobodies. But, Mercedes' transparent ass was drawing attention to the tension between herself and Sam. Sam was pretty convincingly playing things off as he smiled at the Jones women.
Quinn said, "I think that we've been manning the door too long. Where the hell are the servants for this thing, anyway, Milzie?"

Mrs. Jones smiled and waved over some for the girls. "Come inside, young men. You know, Mercy's father is Dalton alumni. Her brother attended as well and we sent her to their sister school, hoping that some of the others would rub off on her. But, we may as well have sent her to McKinley!" She chuckled and rubbed Quinn's arm, "No offense, Honey. You know that you're an exception amongst those types."
"Well, I graduated from McKinley..." When the woman turned abruptly to face him, he quickly said, "I went through a phase where I suppose I wanted to go slumming."
Sam's eyes widened as he tried to fight off a laugh.
"How unfortunate," Mrs. Jones said. "I hope that you learned your lesson and at least went to a good college. Mercy threw her future away in LA and came back here to be a damn music teacher, which of course is fine, but we raised her for greatness and she's given us a music teacher."
"Music teachers are pretty cool, but your daughter has star potential. Have you ever heard her sing?" Sam asked.
Mercedes grabbed another glass of wine and handed it to him, "Sam, our standards are a little bit different around here than Wherever, Tennessee." She smiled at her mother and shook her head, "Trust me, I know that I made a mistake in LA. Blaine, how about you prep your friends next time before bringing them into settings they're unfamiliar with."
"My mistake," Blaine said. Now, Sam was clearly affected, though he continued to smile.
Mrs. Jones waved a hand and said, "My daughter can be melodramatic. Everyone is welcome, here. It's Christmas."
"It's not, but..." Sam mumbled.
"IN JULY!" She spoke over him. "I love celebrations. Oh! I am SO SORRY!" She said, turning quickly to face them. "I am Millicent Covington-Jones, but everyone calls me Milzie and IF you dare call me Mrs. Jones, I will have you escorted out by guards."
Sam and Blaine chuckled, but Quinn and Mercedes quickly said in unison, "She's serious."
Blaine's face straightened, but Sam laughed harder. "I don't know what's funnier, the thought of somebody getting kicked out, or the fact that she prefers to be called 'Milzie.'" Blaine gave him a small smirk, but his eyes squinted. Sam knew that look. Blaine wanted him to shut up. No such luck. "So, Milzie! Where is it that YOU went to school?" Sam asked. "you have a hint of Southern in your accent, do you not?"
"Guilty as charged, I'm afraid. I was born in Georgia, raised in Atlanta until middle school, when my family relocated to Lima. I hated this place, to be honest, but this is where I met Bishop. We met in high school and we have been together SINCE. He went to Columbia and I followed him, attending Barnard..."

Blaine shook his head, "I thought that my parents were horrible. Not trying to say that yours are, Mercedes! Milzie is just kinda..."
"No, they're horrible," She said. She rubbed Sam's arm and asked, "Are you alright?"
"Yeah - but you seem a bit drunk."
"My mom drives me to drink," Mercedes admitted.
"I think she's alright."
"That's because she doesn't know about us. If she did, she would go in for you. Right now, she thinks that you're a friend of a friend."
"I don't care for that title, too much - but I understand that she stresses you out." He sighed and rubbed the hand that was on his arm, smiling down at the lovely little lady in white, "You look really beautiful in that, by the way." Mercedes lowered her head to smile brightly, afraid that her cheeks were darkening. And in that moment, things went wrong... Sam smirked and used his finger to pull her face up and see the fruits of his compliment - apple cheeks just as deep red and he leaned in and kissed her on one of them. It was soft, but swift. It was enough for Judy Fabray to see.

While Sam and Mercedes were yet talking, alone in the comfortably crowded room, Judy watched them and taunted Milicent. "Oh, Milzie, is Mercy now dating," she chuckled, "Sam Evans?" Milzie turned to see her daughter, laughing at the blond man and touching his arm with one hand and her belly with the other... laughing in a way that she had never really seen her laugh before. But, she would never give Judy the satisfaction.
"Oh, hush! She invited the Anderson boy and this boy came along with him. Mercy probably barely even knows that boy."
"That eye contact between them most definitely tells an altogether different story," Judy commented, smugly.
Milzie's eyebrow raised and she said, "Well, even if there is something there, he seems like a nice enough boy, though not too bright. Mercedes is probably just being polite. Now, he and Quinn - that would be adorable, wouldn't it? They would be a regular Ken and Barbie. You wouldn't have to be forced to tolerate that goon with the Mohawk as a future son-in-law. At least this one I would be willing to invite to gatherings. If I ever see that Mohawk boy that Quinn's been with for all these years on my property, I'll call the police."
Judy bit back a glare and forced a smile as she lied, "Oh, Noah grows on you. I know that the last time he was here was a disaster, but his manners have improved and if Quinn does marry him, at least he's proven that he can work hard and make money... well... a little, at least. As a matter of fact, I suppose that he and Sam are probably on equal footing in the tolerable friend, intolerable future son-in-law category. Well... no. They aren't , because Quinn's a lawyer and Mercy is a failed singer. I mean, far be it from me to judge Mercy's choices, but I am quite relieved that Quinn and Sam's high school love affair did not extend beyond a few months. She dated him when he was actually acceptable. Unlike now - so you should hope that the looks in their eyes is some passing idea..."
"Mercedes doesn't make the best decisions, but she'll learn from any mistake that she makes," Milzie said.
"Good. Don't get me wrong, it isn't Sam's fault that his family lost everything when he was in high school and they were actually homeless for a time. How could we hold it against him that he took up stripping as a teenager to help them out financially?" Milzie gasped and looked at Mercedes and Sam still talking to each other, "And its not SO bad that he was the stupidest kid in his graduating class or that he still strips. Mercy's surely just in the mood for some hot entertainment."
Milzie snapped, "She barely knows him! She's probably trying to hook him up with one of her many loser friends."
"Except her friends are all more successful than she is, aren't they?" Judy seriously asked Milzie, who seriously believed the same thing. Judy added, "Maybe she's trying not to wander too far from her league."
"Maybe he's trying to find himself a sugar momma, because he knows that her family has money! Not in Milzie's house, you don't , you big lipped, stripping, dumb country fuck..." Milzie marched over to her daughter, with Judy following, in amusement. "Sam Evans," she said and he turned and looked shocked at her as the smirk on her face told that something was afoot. "I have just been told that you are a professional dancer! Maybe at some point, when the celebration allows, I might procure your services for an event."
Sam looked at Mercedes and saw her with a death grip on her champagne flute - that deer in headlights look on her face - so adorable... But, he told Milzie, "That would be extremely awkward..."
"Oh, why? You're a professional dancer. I'm sure that you aren't shy!" Judy chimed in, looking from Sam to Mercedes, expectantly.
Mercedes now interrupted with, "It would be awkward because Sam's no professional dancer! Our Glee clubs competed against each other all the time in high school. The kid can barely keep a beat and he was always losing his place in the choreography."
Sam grimaced, "I did an excellent body roll," he commented.
"Which, I'm sure improved with time," Judy said, bubbly. Sam smiled and nodded, but Mercedes continued with a scoff..
"Sam has a home-based self-publishing business!" She snapped.
"Yeah - I make comic books myself and sell them at the Completely Nerdgasmic Comics store," he said.
Judy clapped her hands together, "Oh, you mean that place that Mercy works while she's still going to school!" She placed a hand on Mercedes' chin and said, "I can't keep telling you how brave it is of you not to try to do too much while aiming to fulfill your little dream of being a music teacher."
Quinn groaned and rolled her eyes. Mercedes forced a smile at Judy, while Milzie removed the woman's hand from her daughter's face and replied to the woman, "Yes, because if she did do too much, she might end up nearly flunking out, like Quinn almost did in high school."
Judy blinked and rubbed Quinn's back as she commented, "I will admit that I was worried for a bit. But at least my baby redeemed herself by getting accepted into Yale."
"Yes, and then she accepted a Yale professor into her bed," Milzie said with a smile.
"Oh... wow..." Sam said as his eyes widened and he looked at Mercedes, who was far too embarrassed to look anywhere but inside of her flute.
She did reply, "This is simply the real Jude and Milzie coming out."
Judy was saying, "And, as you said, he was an educated man who teaches at an Ivy League school! Quinn could have done worse for herself. She could be obviously having sex or at the very least being infatuated by a comic book self publishing stripper... Not that anyone here is that and not that anyone else here is involved with such a person..."
Milzie nodded her head and her nostrils flared, though she still wore a smile, "Well,, Quinn did do worse for herself, didn't she? Because its a fact and not just one dumb blonde's speculation that Quinn dated such a person at one point, and we all know that right now, she is with a borderline mentally deficient pool cleaner... who cheats!"
"Whoa," Sam said, wishing he could stop this train wreck that the other guests were pretending not to see, but socializing comfortably as they slyly stared on.
"And Mercy's seeing, who again? Has she even been on one date that you know of since that burly boy in school?" Judy asked.
Milzie said, "Of course she has! Mercy has been socially seeing a man now for years! He was a star athlete, graduated well, went to a wonderful school, has a degree and is one of the most successful sports agents his age, for big name athletes!" The woman chuckled lightly and flipped her hair behind her shoulder.
Judy guffawed and said, "Oh, HIM! What's his name again, Mercy?" They all looked at a shocked, on the spot Mercedes with wide eyes, because she forgot all about that dude, to be honest, but she'd never tell them that...
"Anthony," Quinn quickly saved.
Judy frowned at her daughter and snarled, "Thank you, Mercy."
Sam folded his arms, trying not to look bothered (and failing) as he asked, "So there is an Anthony?" He looked at Mercedes a little harder than she would have wanted in front of her mother and the others.
"Anthony's too busy with real success to be concerned about a girl that he sometimes sees when he comes to Lima to visit his parents," Mercedes said with a smile.
"Don't be ridiculous. He adores you," Milzie said and waved her daughter off.
Sam asked, "So, Anthony is...?"
Simultaneously, the Jones women and Judy answered:
Mercedes: A friend
Milzie: Her future husband.
Judy: Someone that Milzie pretends is interested in her daughter to not admit that the girl has nobody.
Mercedes sighed as Judy and Milzie practically pressed their noses together snarling and arguing under their breath with bared teeth that were trying to fake smiles.
Sam whispered to Mercedes, "Suddenly, I would rather be around Sugar and Santana."
"I would rather be anywhere, but here," she said back.
He smiled deviously at her and she looked back at him confused. Before she could ask him what, he snatched her hand and began to lead her out. She followed, partially drunk, partially in shock as they hand and hand headed outside. Sam waved to her flabbergasted mother on the way out of the front door and Judy cackled and clapped her hands. Mercedes gasped, when she finally realized what had just happened... "My mom is gonna lose her shit!" She said.
"Your mom seems as though her shit's been lost for awhile," he said.
"But, but..." Mercedes tried to speak.
"She now knows and even though I'm sure it makes her sick to death, its better that she knows now than in the future, some time AFTER all of this, today." He smiled and wrapped his arm around her and kissed her temple. "I have been wanting to put my lips on you all afternoon," he said and gave her a proper kiss on the way to his truck.

A trip to the park in her fancy white dress cheered her up. She knew that Milzie would be livid, not only about the fact that she and Sam were clearly together, but also because of the fact that she left the party early, hand in hand with him. Should she try to make up some kind of lie? She wasn't good at that kind of thing. She kept it real for lack of knowing how to play most things off... Ugh - Milzie was probably smiling through layers of wrath as she laughed at Sam's impressions of her mom while he was pushing her on the swing. That took talent.
"She hates you," Mercedes said.
"I'll win her over," Sam promised.
"No. That woman is unmovable," Mercedes said.
"Well, maybe your dad will like me," Sam said. She stopped laughing, stopped smiling, became a wall, no longer even kicking her legs to propel herself on the swing. Sam reached for the chains and forced her to a halt. "What's up?"
"I had completely forgotten about him," she said, sadly.
"He never tried to make himself seen tonight," Sam commented.
"He wasn't there. My dad hates these kinds of gatherings. He went on some kind of fishing trip or something, instead."
"I go fishing! That's my ticket in - Mr. Jones!" Sam said.
"No..." Mercedes said and shook her head. "Mr. Jones is nobody's ticket anywhere. My mom's crazy, but I can handle her. He... He just hurts my feelings. Sam, my mom is the NICE one." Sam's eyes widened and he blew out a breath, but he took her hand, kissed it and smiled. "I know you're thinking that he can't be so bad, but you didn't believe me when I tried to tell you about my mom. They never attended anything that I was ever a part of, because my mom only does things to be noticed and my dad refuses to participate in things that he finds not of substance. Not my mom's parties, not my graduation..." She lowered her head.
"Your dad didn't go your graduation?" Sam asked incredulously.
She chuckled, sadly, "My PARENTS didn't go to my graduation." Sam's jaws moved as he ground his teeth together. She shrugged and said, "It fell on the day that Milzie had a retreat with the governor's wife and some other ladies. My dad simply saw no reason to see me get handed a diploma that I 'wasn't going to use for anything anyway' were his exact words. He didn't support me wanting to be a singer and he wasn't going to waste his time attending a ceremony that was celebrating me chasing after foolishness." Sam cupped her face and gave her a long, lingering kiss on the lips. She smiled into the kiss and let him guide her back to his truck so that they could head home.

Mercedes got up fairly early and washed up, her hair pulled into a messy bob, cleaning up around the apartment in a pair of tights and a t-shirt. When she heard the distinct knock, she expected it and opened the door and stepped out of the way for Hurricane Milzie to barge inside. "Of course, I'm sure you realize that Judy Fabray is eating this up! As if she actually has any room to gloat. Quinn may be a lawyer, but she's one of the worse lawyers in town and only at that firm because of her father's friendship with one of the partners. Still - when you have a daughter who is a lawyer, she can shamelessly have sex with whomever she chooses, even a loser like that dirty Mohawk boy, but you... You should not be even fraternizing with some homeless artist stripper, much less WHATEVER it is that you ARE doing with him - and believe me, I do NOT want to know what that is!"
After the woman finished her tangent, she sigh and folded her arms as she tried to catch her breath. "Ok, Mom. You want some tea or freshly squeezed juice?"
"Juice, please. And what do you mean by ok?" Milzie asked.
"I meant, 'ok - I hear everything that you said and I know how you feel about it...' And you're always entitled to your opinion." They went into the kitchen as they talked.
"That is not the ok that you need to be meaning. You need to mean, 'Ok, Mom - you're absolutely right, just like you were about me going to LA and falling flat on my face and I'm sorry that I don't exercise more wisdom and class before I make decisions.' Do you know what Bishop would say if he ever found out about that boy?"
"I know that you won't tell him and that if anybody else tells him, he'll shut them down for gossiping," Mercedes said, retrieving the fruit for the juice.
"I'm certainly NOT going to tell him, or anyone else! What POSSESSED you to do this to yourself?" Milzie asked.
"He's a great guy," Mercedes said. "Money isn't everything, but he makes more than I do, anyway."
"Stripping!"Milzie said, placing a hand over her heart and shaking her head.
"There's nothing wrong with that. Mom. Everyone doesn't have the same means that you and Dad and the Fabrays and Andersons and others have."
"No, they don't - and we're supposed to leave them in their world and stay in ours!"
Mercedes sighed and nodded, "Ok." Milzie opened her mouth to ask what kind of ok, but quickly, Mercedes clarified, "The same kind of ok as before. Mom... you aren't going to convince me that Sam and I shouldn't be together. I'm sorry if that bothers you."
"No, you aren't," Milzie snapped and rolled her eyes.
"No, I'm not," Mercedes agreed and set the glass of juice on the counter in front of her mother.
"Well, I'm not sorry about how I know this will turn out. It will turn out like every single thing that you ventured out on your own to do without your good sense. You'll try at it and be so happy with yourself for your peanut accomplishments, Bishop will tear you apart, and you'll fail, then quit, then come apologize, promising not to be so stupid again... but from the looks of things, you will never learn your damn lesson. A boy like that would only use a girl like you up for all that shes good for and move along to the next thing."
"He's nothing like that," Mercedes started.
"I hope for your sake that you're just doing this to get under my skin, or because you're bored and his dumb ass amuses you, because if you seriously think that you're more than some fascinating curiosity to that kid, you're going to be so upset when it fall apart and he marries Brittany, or somebody like her." Milzie reached for her juice and looked into the glass. "It's too thick. I'll have tea, instead," she said with a smile. Mercedes tried to force smile back at her, but she couldn't hide that those words cut her to her core. She'd given Shane up for fear of him finding something better and she had much deeper feelings for Sam.
Of course, she believed he could do better. She wondered all of the time when he seemed like he had something on his mind if he was thinking of somebody else, but then she would call his name to get his attention and when he looked at her, nothing else seemed to exist, for either of them. She wasn't going to let her mother break her down with her negativity. "I'm sorry that I offered tea... I don't even have any," she said, sifting through her cabinets.
"No biggie. I'll get a drive through smoothie. Smooches," Milzie cheered as she headed for the door, seemingly pleased with herself. She was thinking that she had done her damage, that Mercedes was going to be that weak girl whose mother bullied her and frightened her into giving up something she wanted. She simply didn't understand. This wasn't just about wanting Sam, it was about what she didn't want, as well. She didn't want to be without him. She didn't want to be that woman she was when they got together, and damn it, she refused to be!