Truth or Dare with the Pack
Edward's POV
Shit. I already new what was going through her mind. I was going to chicken out and chose truth but she was going to ask if I ever saw Bella…unclothed before. And I admit I have, BUT IT WAS AN ACCIDENT! I came back from hunting early and she was changing and I was about to jump into her window when I noticed that she was…getting ready for bed. I couldn't look away. Damn teenage hormones of mine. When I finally snapped out of it I couldn't believe I just did that to her and I swore I wouldn't let her know…or at least not until just before I changed her so after she was changed she'd forget eventually.
"Well?" Rosalie interrupted my thoughts.
I sighed. I guess I'd have to choose dare, even though it was going to be one of the most…disturbing things I'll probably ever have to do in my entire existence.
"Dare" I mumbled. She smirked evilly at me and I could hear her sickening laugh going on in her head. Not good.
"Good. I dare you to apply for a job as a stripper at the gay strip club in Port Angeles in a Little Red Riding hood costume and when you're on stage, you have say 'Protect yourself from the wolf! Throw these at them' and hand them fruit from your fruit basket" I stared at her in shock. I already new this was coming, but still...HOLY.SHIT. This is going to be the cause of my second death…UGH…
"ARE YOU INSANE?!?!" I yelled at her.
"Maybe…" Rose giggled. I glared at her but she just smirked back. Stupid bitch…
"OMFG! A GAY STRIP CLUB?!?! I'VE ALWAYS WANTED TO GO TO ONE OF THOSE! WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME THIS BEFORE?!?! HUH?!?! DOES ANYONE HAVE ANY CHANGE IN ONES FOR A TWENTY?!?! OMG OMG OMG THIS IS GOING TO BE SOO MUCH FUN!!" Jared shouted out when he snapped out of it. Creepy wolf homo.
I then just sighed and closed my eyes and holding my hand out, waiting for the damn costume I'm suppose to wear.
She ran upstairs in a flash and came back down with a blond wig with wavy pig tails, a dress with a white blouse for the top, covered in a black corset with red ribbon holding it on, and for the bottom half of the dress, it was red and white checker board pattern that sort of poofed with red see-through material, white knee-lengthen socks, black heeled dress shoes and a red cape. Yep. This is definitely going to be my second death.
I snatched the death clothes and ran to my room to change. Once I had everything on, I peeked outside before stepping out. Everyone just stared at me wide-eyed for a few moments before they all burst out laughing and I glared at them all.
All of a sudden Bella stopped for some reason. Maybe she came to her senses and stopped laughing since she's suppose to love me. But she just stood there shocked with eyes bulging out and everyone noticed so they all kept quiet. And out of nowhere she said,
"OMG! I'M LEZ!" and everyone burst out laughing again.
"I LOVE LESBIANS!" Jacob added in. Everyone shut up and just looked at him lk 'wtf?' for a couple seconds…and then started laughing their asses off again. Bella fell to the ground clutching her sides. So much for the love reason, I thought.
Once everyone composed themselves enough, Rosalie realized something. Uh-oh…She took two oranges and ran over to me vampire speed before I could get away and shoved them down my dress where my…yeah…are supposed to be.
"Awww you look so adorable" Bella came over and pinched my cheeks like I was a little girl. I just dropped my jaw. I couldn't believe she just did that to me! I mean, I'm almost a foot taller then her! Before I could protest, Rosalie grabbed me and through me into my Volvo with everyone else piling into my, Rosalie's, or Emmet's cars.
I was about to just drive off somewhere else when my phone rang.
"Don't even think about it or I'll shove the rest of your fruits where the sun don't shine and when I say that I mean where it HURTS and you're going to be having trouble shitting it back out Mrs.Pussyballs!" Alice shouted on the other line. Damnit!
When we got at the…gay strip club, Rosalie shoved me into an office where I guess is the owner's office.
"Hello, what can I do for you sweet thang" I guess it's only natural that the owner would be gay.
Omg. He is fine if I do say so myself. Wait. Their all… I did NOT want to finish hearing that thought.
"Yeah…I was wondering if I could apply for a job as a little red riding hood stripper" I said in a dead voice. Rosalie elbowed me.
"I mean. I was like, you know, wondering if I could apply for a job, you know, as like, a little red riding hood stripper!?!" I said in an enthusiastic girly voice. EW…I'm creeping myself out already.
"Oh? Anyone else? How about you sugar? Or you? Oh you are just…yummy" he continued rambling and asking all the guys that were with us. –Shudders-
"NO ITS OK!" all the guys shouted. Well for the exception of Jared.
"Oh no, thank you. I'm just here to enjoy" Jared smiled. Perv… I don't know who's worse. Him…or Embry. Eh their both disgusting dogs.
"Well okay. If I could just get you to sign here" he took out a sheet of paper, probably the application, and pointed to an empty line where I was supposed to write down my signature. Well…Rosalie didn't say I had to write down my real name. Mwahahahaha. Wait. Did I just laugh like a psycho maniac? Man…I need to watch the damn monster side of me. Go back into your whole. I thought to it while shoving it down into the ground in my mind.
Monster: Oh come on. I wanna come out and play.
Me: Screw off and go back into your whole.
Monster: Please? You know you want to drink that sick minded bastard. He's thinking about you and your brothers you know…in an unpleasant way…hahaha
Me: Actually he's thinking about you since you're the vampire side of me and you look better than I do as a human and unless I'm feeding, which I'm not right now, I'm always the human side of me –smile-(A/N: Yea I know confusing eh? But once you get it, it's true :))
Monster: Pssh…oh yeah…uh…yerm…ah…I'M PRETTIER THAN YOU!
Me: Yeah uh huh. Good job on attracting horny humans. Now why don't you take your pretty face and shove it down that damn whole with you
Monster: Mrs.Pussyballs
Me: -middle finger-
Monster: -mumbles curse words-
Me: -smiles some more-
"Uh...ma'am?" The owner snapped me back to reality.
"Oh. Right" I signed 'Mike Newton' and wrote down his number along with it.
"Thank you. Now you're on in five, over at that pole" he pointed downstairs at some pole.
"Thank you soo much!" I forced a smile.
When we were out of earshot, everyone burst out laughing and pointing at me.
Note to self: Kill everyone. Okay maybe not Bella but everyone else!
"Whatever. I'm just gonna get this over with" and I walked away to the…pole…
Everyone followed, waiting for me to start after Rosalie handed me the basket of fruits.
I started dancing around with a dead face on and half trying to take off the costume I was wearing, half shouting,
"Protect yourselves from the wolf! Throw these at them!" and passes those…men… (Depending if their the more feminine or masculine gays) (A/N: I heard on TV there's such thing and I was like whoa…nvr new that before…haha) the fruits from the cursed fruit basket.
"Wahoo you go cowgirl!"
"Nice body!"
"Sexilicious!" The crowd kept shouting disgusting comments at me, well at least they didn't shout everything they were thinking in their disturbing minds, while my family, girlfriend, and the dogs were laughing at me with people staring at them like they were lunatics…well they kinda are if you think about it. Making me do this ridiculous…stunt... Bastards.
Right when I was about to grudgingly take off my boxers, Bella jumped on stage and I just stared at her in confusion and relief.
"Please, like I'm going to let you take off everything. I'm not that mean. Besides your mine…even if you are I girl" she said giggled, gesturing to the outfit on the floor. (A/N: I'm not gonna be that mean to Edward here hehe :P)
I sighed in relief and ignored the urge to jump up and down in joy and kissing Bella all over in thanks. I picked her up and ran vampire speed when no one was looking back to the car and drove home.
Me and Bella were the first ones back (because I went over 200mph ignoring Bella's protests) so I ran out of the car to my room and changed. When everyone was back I asked,
"Well I believe it's you turn, Emmet, truth or dare?"
Sorry I didn't update sooner but I have a life too! Plus I enjoy sleeping in since schools out :P So I think I'm just going to add a chapter every week. Unless I get REALLY bored and have nothing better to do. And next Monday I'm supposed to have summer school but I think I'm just going to drop out since I didn't need to go, I just wanted to go cuz my friends went last year and sed it was fun n sum ppl I know from this other school r going and I wanna make fun of them hehe. Anyways, Edwards costume is on my profile and fanks a bunch to Runs-with-vampires and Blue-eyed Bella for the ideas :D
Also since I haven't done many truths, can anyone suggest any truths for Emmet? (And nothing like how many times he and Rosalie sleep together or anything like that cuz it's kinda old. I've seen it in like every truth or dare story no offense though but I'm looking for something original)
K imam go :)
Buh-byeeeee