I guess this could be considered my first real fight with Alice. She was angry that I was keeping something from her while I was upset at her prying into my life. We walked without speaking to the elevator. Our fellow journalists watched us go with open curiosity. I stuffed my hands in my pockets waiting for the doors to close.
I half expected Alice to jump down my throat in our small enclosure but she didn't. We stood in complete silence watching the lights change as we descended. Only when a copy clerk opted not to enter our elevator on the third floor did I think about how we looked.
Alice's arms were crossed tightly and her small face threw sparks. I too felt angry and it must have shown on my face as well. My distorted reflection on the doors didn't do me justice. It felt good not to feel hollow for just a little while and it is very possible my misery was feeding the flames of my anger. Why couldn't Alice just let me wallow?
We reached the lobby and both exited quickly. People mulling about moved from our path shooting alarmed looks around. I shoved the revolving door until air hit my face. City air filled my nose and helped calm me slightly. Alice stopped once we were outside. I halted next to her.
"So where are we going?" I muttered. Now that I thought about it I was quite hungry.
"How about my apartment?" Alice asked. It would give us the most privacy. I felt myself flinch at the thought. That's where Edward lives. Alice noticed my convulsion and frowned. "What is there something wrong with where I live now?" I forced the shiver from my voice as I answered.
"No, that's fine I guess." I was trying for nonchalant, as if the location did not really matter but there was barely contained hysteria behind me words. Alice nodded and started walking again. I followed slightly behind her.
The building loomed before us as Alice searched for her key. I looked up at the penthouse and thought about the probabilities of Edward being at home, of Edward walking down the stairs, of Edward forgiving me. None were very good. When we were finally climbing the stairs I felt myself hoping Edward would appear or hoping we would hear his voice while dreading both.
Alice's apartment was just as tidy as it was the last time I came to visit. She kicked off her high heels in the front hallway and shrank three inches. Her petite stature amazed me. I removed my shoes as well before following. She walked to a table with a phone and small machine with a blinking red light. She pressed a button and a mechanical voice began.
"You have two new messages." Beep.
"Hey Alice honey, I was calling to remind you about Edward's birthday dinner in a few weeks. I want to really make it special; after all you only turn 26 once. Anyway I booked the restaurant but I wanted to check over the guest list with you. Call me later. Love you." Esme's voice trailed away. I had to hold my entire body rigid at the mention of his name so Alice wouldn't notice my flinch. This was going to be difficult.
"Message erased, next new message."
"Hey Ali, it's me. I," a deep sigh was heard, "I just really need to talk to someone. Could you come up later? Thanks, I know you're my favorite sister for a reason."
"Message erased, end of messages." My heart thudded erratically in my chest. Edward's voice sounded absolutely dead on that recording. Alice sighed loudly and continued into the kitchen. She stood on her tip-toes to reach a bottle of wine. She skillfully popped the cork and set the bottle aside to breath.
"Edward thinks I'll always come and do his laundry and pick up the pieces whenever he loses a fuck buddy. I am about done with it." Her hand pinched the bridge of her nose in just the same way Edward always did. "You know I tried to console him when he broke up with Tanya the night of the wedding but he wouldn't listen to a word I said. He just drank himself into a stupor repeating 'She'll call me, she has to.' Over and over again. Who knew he was attached to the witch anyway? I had originally thought he dumped her. Anyway when I went to check on him the next morning, I was hoping he didn't drown in a pool of his own vomit or something, I found him perfectly fine. Smiling actually and his entire apartment smelled of sex. Obviously that boy just needs to find someone to play 'hide the pickle' and just leave me the hell out of it. I even found the girl's thong on his couch! I bet she left it for him as a souvenir since she seemed to have vanished before I arrived." Her perfectly shaped nails tapped along her counter. "Edward Cullen needs to find a girl who has more substance than a piece of lettuce." Her eyes cut back to me. Her tirade surprised me. Alice really had no idea what had happened. I feigned a shocked expression at the Tanya news, technically I shouldn't know yet.
"Edward broke up with Tanya?" I spat the word Tanya out of true hatred. Alice looked calculating.
"Yeah, they got in a fight at the end of the wedding reception. I guess Tanya was trying to keep Edward's leash a little tight and he snapped and told her off. I guess there was a major scene in the parking lot, but I missed it looking for you." She pursed her lips studying me. "Why do you care?"
"I... um… well Tanya really irked me. I would see her at Aro's parties and she was always so rude to me. I'm glad Edward got rid of her. She was just awful." I nodded enthusiastically from my own lie.
"Right. So are you going to tell me what's going on with you or what?" I had a strange suspicion the pieces where falling into place in Alice's mind, if only slightly.
"What do you want to know exactly?" I hedged. My anger had disappeared as soon as I heard Edward's voice and was replaced with unease.
"Well first of all, why were you so upset at the wedding?"
"I really was exhausted and fighting a nasty hangover headache." Not a lie, but not the complete truth.
"Ok, then why are you upset now and what about your hair?"
"I had a paparazzi scare so my hair is a disguise of sorts. I'm upset because I'm an idiot who pushed away a guy I really like." When I paused Alice cocked a brow daring me to stop. I sighed and continued. "I've known him for a while but we were just starting to get to know one another. But now I don't think he wants to speak to me ever again." I felt tears prick my eyes but I held them back.
"Who is he?" Alice came forward and rubbed my arms in comfort, obviously she thought my paparazzi scare was Mikhail aftermath.
"I think I am definitely going to need a glass of wine to tell you this story." Alice nodded and grabbed glasses. We took the bottle with us to the living room so we could sit and talk.
"I think I know how to make this a little easier to talk about. How about we use aliases for the parties involved? I have a pretty good idea who you are talking about anyway." Alice patted my hand. I took a gulp of wine.
"OK." I studied Alice's face looking for anger. She knew about Edward and I, but was she mad? She just smiled sympathetically and began.
"I'm going to tell you what I think happened, and then you can fill in the blanks." I nodded. "So, you said you met him a while ago, let's call him… Joe. You met Joe around the time you first started working at Seattle Sun, correct?" I nodded again. "And you liked him immediately?" Nod. "But you didn't make a move until later. You saw each other outside of work parameters once you stopped coming to the office and clicked even more. But he was guarded so you were unsure of your feelings. Now the next part I know even less about."
She shifted on the couch and put down her wine glass, untouched.
"You saw each other at the wedding and were having a marvelous time. I don't know what happened that you ended up in the closet alone and upset." She glared slightly, she had seen through my white lie. "But then you reconciled and had a massive crisis between Sunday and now." I nodded again.
"I did meet him after I started work at the paper. He surprised me at first, but then I saw him again at the sports benefit. I have never been more attracted to a person than I was that night. But I didn't want to move too quickly. He helped me deal with the Mikhail incident in his own way which is why we didn't get together immediately, or so I thought. But then as soon as we are together everything goes down the toilet because the paparazzi caught us. I couldn't deal with the attention again so I shoved him off and ran. I tried to apologize later that day but I have yet to get a response from him." I hung my head and ran my fingers through my foreign hair. I grabbed a fist full and decided I hated it.
This was not me; I was just running away from my problems, I would have to face him.
"Oh, sweetie."
"I want to change my hair back." I said sitting up. I wanted to run to the nearest hair salon and demand results. Alice smiled.
"You can go to my stylist. His name is Carlos and he is orgasmically amazing." She looked slightly worried but hid it well behind a smile.
"How soon?" I could no longer stand being this alien person. I needed to go now.
"I can call him and see. Usually he makes openings for me. We can probably go see him later this afternoon." That would have to be good enough.
"Thank you Alice. I didn't think you would be this understanding." I smiled sheepishly. It felt good to have someone other than Maurice know the truth.
"I suspected when I saw you two at the jazz club." Alice smirked. What was she talking about? We didn't see Edward that night. I racked my brain. Where did we miss communicate? "Anyway, I suspect Joe will come to his senses soon enough." I was lost. Who did Alice think I liked?
She took out her phone and dialed the number.
"Hello Janine? Hi, this is Alice Cullen speaking. I would like to see Carlos this afternoon if it would be possible." She waited for a response. "Fantastic. I'll be there around three then. Ciao." Her phone flipped shut. "He is a hair god, you will be so happy with your results." She picked up her wine again and took a small sip. "From the way you were gulping this I had to make sure it was the correct Zinfandel, I wouldn't want to be scammed into buying cheap box wine."
"That would truly be a tragedy." I nodded in sarcastic pity. She rolled her eyes at me.
"So do you want me to talk to Joe for you?" She sipped again.
"No! Don't do that!" My response was a bit explosive. I could not have Alice talk to the wrong guy about my feelings.
"So you will deal with this?" She raised her eye brows expectantly.
"I'll try."
"Ok then."
OOOOOOo
When I arrived home from Alice's I had an idea. My mind was racing thinking of everything I wanted to say to Edward, I could not hold them in. I immediately booted up my laptop and set to work.
I had a letter by the time I had to leave for my appointment. I saved and print and placed it in a manila envelope on my desk. I met Alice at the salon.
The décor was interesting to say the least. The floor was marble with beautiful chrome counters and plush leather chairs. Everything screamed money. Alice had already informed the receptionist that my styling today was to be put on her tab. I frowned at her but stopped quickly when I heard a disappointed tongue clucking sound.
"No, no, no! One as beautiful as you should not frown; it will give you premature wrinkles. Ah, Alice darling, how are you my pearl?" A tall and handsome Hispanic man stood before us. He was at least 6' 2" and it seemed preposterous when he bent down to kiss both of Alice's cheeks in turn.
"Carlos, it's just marvelous to see you! How are you my love?" Alice purred at him. Carlos thrust his hips to one side and planted a hand on the bone.
"Darling, I am fabulous. There is no other way to be. Now who is this beautiful specimen here?" His dark brown eyes turned on me surveying my body up and down. I blushed even though I had a sneaky suspicion that he was gay.
"This is Isabella; she is one of my closest friends. She has been hiding from the paparazzi because she was 'in a relationship' with Mikhail Strauss a while back and they have returned looking for a follow up story. Bella dyed her own hair as a disguise but deeply regrets her choice." There was the disapproving tongue cluck again.
"Isabella," his tongue caressed my name as only a fluent Spanish speaker could. "Come with me, I will wash away your worries." His large hand engulfed my own and started pulling me to one of the chairs. His skin was luxuriously soft as only an artist could be. "Now, I would say your original color was a darker brown correct?" He fluffed my hair getting a feel of the texture.
"Yes, a bit on the mousy side but…"
"Tsk tsk tsk. No mousy brown hair for you! I think a rich chestnut with subtle highlights, and possible layers are in order."
"But I just want it to go back to normal." I tried to argue.
"Isabella." His deep eyes locked on mine. I felt lost in the intensity of the gaze. "This is my life. Do you honestly think I would suggest something that would not accentuate your best attributes?"
"No, but…"
"There are no buts. Do you trust me?" I took a deep breath.
"Yes."
"Marvelous, then let's get started." He spun my chair so I watched him examine my roots in the mirror. I looked nervous and pale but I gripped the arm rests to hold myself still. I trusted his judgment.
I was brought over to a dyeing station where the magic began. Carlos' fingers did magic on my scalp. I felt my neck release tension and my mind empty as he chattered on.
"Well, I recently met my boy toy, Ricardo, at a club called Skin. He was just the hottest thing there." He fanned himself with his free hand for a second. I couldn't stop the laugh. "He is six foot five and solid muscle. My god that man is amazing. There was more than one pair of jealous eyes that night. I'm just so lucky that he likes to snuggle, just like me. It is rare to find such a built man who is fine with spooning." He sighed.
An hour flew by as I heard numerous hysterical stories about Carlos's school days. Apparently Carlos has been out of the closet since about the sixth grade, but he didn't hit his growth spurt until junior year of high school. Once he did he could get back at all the nasty boys who had made fun of him previously. At one point he had hung the Crew captain into the milk refrigerator in the cafeteria. He wasn't found for over an hour, but he was the one who got detention for destroying school property. He had tried to kick down the door and only succeeded in spraining his own ankle and causing mild damage.
"I swear Chica; I didn't stop laughing for a week. My boy friend at the time thought I was crazy." He chuckled and ran the brush through my hair a final time. "Are you ready to see my masterpiece?" I bit my lip. He had turned me away from the mirror awhile ago so I could not watch the process. I could only see the growing pile of hair on the floor. My stomach dropped to my feet as he spun me around.
Slowly I glanced up. My hair was very close to its natural color, but this was even better. Instead of plain, it had slight layers and very calm highlights. My eyes looked deeper with this color reflecting in them. It was perfect. I smiled at myself in the mirror slowly. Tears formed and slid down my face silently. Carlos smiled at me as well and hugged me tightly.
"You go get him Chica; he would be a fool to not love you." He kissed my cheek and wiped away my tears. I hugged him back tightly; I was finally feeling like me again.
OOOOOOOoo
I arrived home rather late. Alice had taken me to dinner at a new restaurant in the area. I fumbled with my keys and forced my way into my apartment. Silence greeted me. I walked to my laptop and took out the letter I had written. Carefully I read it to check for any mistakes. This was the first step in my attempt at redemption.
Dear Edward,
My name is Isabella Swan. You know me physically better than any other man I have ever known, but I feel that we skipped a few steps since our introduction. Perhaps pheromones were to blame for everything, but I feel you have a right to know my soul as well as my body before you make a decision of whether or not to forgive me. This is me.
To be continued.