Time for yet another "Drew Le Pew" and this time, it's "Past Perfumance"! Essentially, May is chosen as an actress for a film in PokéStar Studios and she's more than happy to participate. But her role isn't the only one that was missing, as well.
However, when stench-ridden Drew Hayden comes to the studios to get autographs from actors and actresses, his stink clears the whole place out. With May left behind, confused, and Drew going casanova on her, things are going to stink - literally.
It was a beautiful day in Virbank City in the Unova Region. Those outside of Unova were not unfamiliar to the movies produced in Virbank City's famous PokéStar Studios that was stationed in Unova. The movies were such a slam-dunk hit that no one expected nothing less than the best from PokéStar Studios. Many trainers were often asked to perform as actors or actresses in the films, and it was not unheard of for a Pokémon to be the lead of a film; in fact, that was more often than not the case.
At the gates of the movie lot, a cop, and his faithful Growlithe were at the security booth, keeping an eye out for trouble. They heard a honk for a horn, and then they said, "Good morning, Brycen."
A man dressed as a ninja with a pale blue motif and a Cryogonal at his side walked in to the studio. He gave the cop a nice smile and then he kept walking to his specific set to get down to work.
The entire lot was abuzz with activity and no one seemed to be sitting around doing nothing. There were some members of the crew carrying a large box of cosmetic supplies, such as shampoo, conditioner, body wash, and the like, for the dressing rooms for all of the actors that were working on the set. They wanted to look their best, which required constant bathing and cleaning.
There were many girls that had matching traits, such as blonde hair, all dressed identically, and they were practicing their dance moves for their movie. It seemed that they were doing the can-can, and they were no only working hard, but also having a lot of fun with each other. It was almost as if they had been doing it their whole lives.
The casting office had a really long line in front of it. There were many people and Pokémon lined up for the office, hoping to find roles in movies to play for their big debut scene. They were all quite hopeful. Even the Pokémon were in costumes, just like their Trainers, and this fact, hopefully, would increase the team's chances of getting a big role.
However, on the lot, there was one movie that was at a standstill. In one studio, there was a man going over a list of people he had casted for the latest movie his company was producing: 'The Pokémon Island Princess'.
On set, there was one particular girl with her Pokémon all working together to help get the props, sets, and costumes ready for filming. She had brown hair that was short and tied back with a bandana covering her head, and her eyes were blue. The main color in her outfit was red, and she was in her teens. The girl was named May Maple, and she was all the way from the Hoenn Region. She had heard about PokéStar Studios in passing and decided to go and check it out for a bit before moving on to Sinnoh to peruse becoming the Top Coordinator in Sinnoh.
"Okay, Beautifly, can you go help Leavanny and Swadloon finish up the rest of the costumes?" May asked of her Butterfly Pokémon.
Beautifly was shooting string from its long mouth; hearing her trainer's request, Beautifly turned around, and nodded with a cheerful noise before flying over to the other side of the room to provide extra threads for the costumes.
"Venusar, Blaziken, how's the lighting coming along? May asked her two larger Pokémon. They nodded and made noises in knowledge that they were doing their job and doing it right.
"Perfect," May said, as she was working on designing the set. "Wartortle, how are you doing on washing some of the older clothes?"
Wartortle nodded and showed May its progress on all of the laundry for the roles.
"That's great work, Wartortle," May said, as she looked around and saw that the room was somewhat empty. "Now if only we can actually start…"
May looked over to her boss, the Casting Director, and saw that he was quite distressed about something. He was going over a list of members of the cast, but he seemed to be upset.
"Boss, is something wrong?" May asked, as she came over to his desk.
"Yes, there is… We…" The Casting Director began, but out of nowhere, the trumpeting of a horn came from the entrance.
"There's the Director…" May said, a little nervous; her Pokémon were lining up, trying to make sure they would impress the director.
The director, an old man, possibly sixty or older, was coming in, followed by a group of men, all saying 'Yes' over and over again to please the director. May and the casting director were tense, as there were some roles that were missing, hoping that the director would not notice.
The majority of the roles were Pokémon, and they had plenty of Pokémon to play the roles that they had, so they were okay where that was concerned.
"Sir," The director said, turning to May's boss. "We have all of the Pokémon we need for our movie, but where are our lead actors?"
The casting director was put on the spot; May, on the other hand, went back to working on the sets to try and speed up the process, unknowingly humming and singing.
The casting director decided to fess up and he said, "Unfortunately, all of our human candidates could not play the parts we needed."
"WHAT?!" The director shouted, in surprise and frustration.
"I tried every candidate on our list, but none of them would cut it on the screen. We would have to make tons of changes to the songs, so we're short the prince and the Island Princess…" The casting director said, but then the entire group of adults were taken in by May's singing voice.
"…Remember me, once in a while, please promise me you'll try…" May sang, as she was singing "Think Of Me", a song from "Phantump Of The Opera", one of her favorite operas.
The casting director then got an idea.
"May! Darling!" The casting director said, catching May's attention.
"Sir?" May asked; she put all of her Pokémon back in their Poké Balls.
"Come with me!" The casting director said, before turning to the director. "One island princess coming up!"
He dragged May into the costume department to try and find the dress that the princess in the movie would wear, and May was utterly confused as to what was going on. The casting director was skimming for the costume while asking May to sing a few lines from her favorite songs and trying to get the pitch right. May was not sure what was happening, but she decided to comply with the request.
"… Say you'll share with me one love, one lifetime. Say the word and I will follow you…" May sang, yet another song from "Phantump Of The Opera".
Meanwhile, outside at the security booth, a boy around May's age came up to the officer. He was quite the handsome young man, with emerald green hair and matching green eyes. He was wearing blue pants, black shoes, and a purple jacket that only covered some of his arms and was somewhat of a biker jacket. However, he was oblivious to one thing: he had really bad body odor; bad enough that he did not have to lift his arms for people to take one sniff and then bolt, puke, or faint. He had a pad of paper in hand and he seemed to be doing nothing wrong.
"Excuse me, officer," He said, talking to the cop and the Growlithe. "Could I please come in and get autographs from the actors and actresses?"
"Please leave, young man," The officer said. "We don't allow loitering around unless you're an actor here."
However, the young boy's body odor was so bad that the officer soon inhaled the stink; the Growlithe got a big whiff of it too, and both Pokémon and trainer were sickened by the smell.
"Leaping Linoone! PEW!" The security guard shouted, as he and his Growlithe bolted at the sight - and smell - of the young bow.
"…My name is Drew." The green-haired boy said, but then he shrugged and walked into the lot.
Drew walked into the studio that was shooting the movie "The Pokémon Island Princess", and he was wandering around, trying to look to for the person in charge. He soon saw the director of the movie and then Drew approached him from behind.
"Excuse me, sir, do you know where I can find any of the actors and actresses; I'm here to get autographs." Drew requested.
The director soon laid eyes on Drew and then he said, "Perfect!"
Taking a good look at Drew, the director was really impressed with his looks, and he said, "You're just what we need for our movie! You can play the prince without a problem!"
However, the director soon changed his mind and he got quite scared when he took one good sniff of Drew's body odor. He gagged, his face turned green, and then the director said, "Did this guy live with Stunky and Skuntank his whole life?!"
Smelling Drew's body odor, everyone in the room soon grew uncomfortable and disgusted; they all were making comments about how Drew looked much better than he smelled and other unsavory comments.
"Run!" "Let's get out of here!" "Call the security guard!" "PEW!" "Get the air freshener!" "Take a bath, stinkpot!"
Drew did not waver when everyone on the set fled in fright. In fact, he just shrugged, thinking that they were all going to go and get ready for the big scene in the movie and they had to get the costumes and scripts ready.
Drew looked to his side and saw the script for the movie; he grew curious and sat in the director's chair to go and read it.
Meanwhile, the casting director had dressed May in a dress with a design akin to that of Cresselia, and he brought her into the studio room. The casting director was not aware of the smelly mishap that had just taken place and they were in for quite a stinky welcoming.
"Director, sir, we have our Pokémon Island Princess in our very own May! With her singing voice, she'll shoot our movie through the roof!" The casting director said, talking tot he director's chair, where Drew was sitting in.
Hearing the casting director, Drew turned around and he saw May. His eyes widened and then he said to the casting director, "For me? This cute girl?"
Seeing - and smelling - Drew's body odor, May and her boss we quite disgusted. Drew grabbed May by the wrist and he pulled her towards him, and Drew told the casting director, "Thank you sir. I thank you so much."
The casting director screamed and then bolted out the studio door. May tried to go after him, while her wrist was still grabbed by Drew's hand.
"Wait! Boss! Don't leave me!" May shouted, freaked out; she felt her employer had abandoned her, and she was not happy about her new situation.
"Hello, love." Drew said, turning May around to face him; he had his hands on May's hips and he smiled with desire and love in his face. May was not amused.
"Who are you?!" May demanded, before smelling Drew's body odor again, and then gagging; she covered her face with her hands to avoid smelling it again.
"Oh, where are my manners," Drew said, chastising himself for his rudeness. "My name is Drew. Drew Hayden - your lover!"
"I beg your pardon?!" May asked, before covering her mouth again. Drew held May in his arms even tighter and then he turned on his "charm".
"And now my little rosebud of passion…" Drew began, before kissing May's cheek a few times. "We shall make some melodrama together…"
Drew kept kissing May on the cheek again, and May was NOT enjoying it. May tried to wriggle out of Drew's grasp, but she could not break free. She tried her best to hold her breath as she kept struggling to break free of her "suitor's" embrace.
'Come on, COME ON!' May thought. 'What am I going to do?!'
"The birth of a notion… The grand illusion…" Drew said, romantically, but May soon managed to slip out of Drew's grip.
"See-ya!" May shouted, and then made a beeline to go somewhere else to hide and get away from Drew. She was relieved to get some clean air, because Drew's body odor was too unpleasant for her own lungs.
May was soon out of Drew's sight, but rather than him being discouraged, he just chuckled and sighed romantically at May's "romanticism".
"Hehehe… This sweet, little, romantic Pidove," Drew said, as he chuckled. "She's looking for a more appropriate setting for our romance, isn't she? That's sweet; so sweet!"
May kept on running, and decided to have her Pokémon on standby in case she encountered Drew again. May soon saw the set for the Shakespearean tragedy that almost everyone knew and loved, "Romeo and Juliet".
She saw that it was Juliet's balcony, and May saw some stairs that led up to the room with the balcony and everything. There was a bed, curtains, and everything that the scene needed.
"Perfect place to hide!" May said, before running up the stairs to the balcony, and she saw that the curtains were actually on the balcony, not at the window to it. She closed the curtains in an attempt to hide and then she tried to relax.
However, Drew walked onto the set, and saw May's silhouette from behind the curtains. He chuckled a bit, and then he said, "Oh, isn't she the sentimental one? Looks like she wants to play "Romeo and Juliet", doesn't she? How adorable!"
Drew ran into the shed where all of the props and costumes for the movie were being stored and then he came out in the costume that Romeo wore over the course of the entire show.
"Juliet, Juliet, therefore art me, Romeo!" Drew attempted to quote; he was not sure whether or not this was correct, but he did not care at the moment.
May, seeing this, only groaned and then slapped herself in the face. She said, "This guy needs a bath and a crash-course in Shakespeare!"
However, Drew somehow climbed up to the balcony without using the stairs; he was over the edge of the balcony fence, his legs dangling, and had May in an embrace from his upper body.
"Oh, my little "Much Ado About Nothings"…" Drew began, as he started kissing May on the cheek and lips over and over again. May was trying to keep herself from throwing up from the smell and the kisses. "Oh, my darling "Lost Labor's Love"…"
Drew kept kissing May's cheeks and had one of her hands in his own; May was scrambling to get away, and she was shouting, "Leave me alone!"
May managed to get her hand out of Drew's wrist, as he was still smacking his lips in an attempt to give May kisses. May made a run for it and then she left the set, not looking back even once.
Drew saw this occur and he chuckled before saying, "Take Two."
May had managed to outrun Drew and she found a place to hide, but where that was, Drew was not sure. Drew walked by a merry-go-round set and he said, "Where are you, pink Buneary? I'm ready to find you and smother you with love!"
Drew found himself on the set of "The Three Musketeers" and he overheard someone say, "Quiet… Quiet….! QUIET!"
He looked into the studio and saw that the director was ready to direct the movie and with his megaphone, he said, "Lights, Camera, roll the cameras… Action!"
"I am Athos!" One actor, playing Athos of the trio said, with his sword in hand.
"I am Porthos!" Another actor said, as he came on set with his own sword.
"And I am Drew!" Drew said, copying the other two and looking at them.
"Run!" The entire group shouted as they all ran out of the studio in fear of Drew's stink.
Drew soon found a large closet and he opened it to reveal that May was hiding from him in the closet. She covered her face in fear of Drew's body odor.
"They're all gone, sweetheart," Drew said, as May shrunk back into the closet and attempted to close the door and hide from him again. "You can come out now; time for us to…"
May merely kicked Drew in the stomach and ran off in fear, shouting, "Take a hint! And a bath!"
Drew managed to catch his breath and then he said, "You know what they say: the best things in life are worth waiting for."
May had once again found a place to hide: in Production Room 12. She hid in the darkness of the room in an attempt to keep Drew off of her tail for the time being. Her plan was to make sure Drew was gone and then make a run for the exit of the lot.
Meanwhile, Drew, outside, was humming and singing along as he tried to go and find May.
"We have no place to go, so I took your tuition…" Drew sang, as he made it to the exact door, and then he opened it, before entering. "I don't know what was on the screen because I left around the climax scene."
However, as soon as he walked in, his body odor cleared out everyone in the room.
"PE-EEW! That picture stunk! Literally!" One of the male patrons said, as he and his friend walked out of the production room.
May, on the other hand, held her breath in hopes that Drew would not see her in the darkness of the room. Drew took a seat in the theatre during the kissing scene in a black and white movie within the studio.
However, the characters soon smelled Drew's body odor again.
"Sacre bleu! Let's get out of here!" The male lead said, and then he and his leading lady ran off in disgust from Drew's stink.
Drew wrapped an arm around a girl's shoulder, and May knew full well that Drew had found her.
"Popcorn, my love?" Drew asked, holding a sack of popcorn to May. May merely took her bag and she whacked him on the head.
"See-ya! Wouldn't wanna breathe around you!" May shouted as she made a beeline for the door and kept on running through the sets.
May kept on running, and formulating a plan using her Pokémon: she would send them out have them use one of their moves on Drew to stall him and keep a lot of distance between them.
'Okay, I have to get away from him somehow…' May thought, really scared.
She found herself near an "Uncle Tom" set within the studio and she ran into the cabin to hide. She managed to catch her breath for a bit, and then she smelled Drew coming once again.
"Wartortle, Water Gun!" May shouted, as she sent out her Wartortle from its Poké Ball.
Wartortle then sprayed a large blast of water from its mouth at Drew's face, causing Drew to step back a bit to try and catch his breath.
May had gotten a few meters away from Drew before calling Wartortle back to its Poké Ball. Drew shook the water off and kept on running after May.
"Come back to me, my little Igglybuff of romance!" Drew said, as he kept on skipping and running after May.
May would not even think about stopping; she had no intention of getting caught by Drew. May shouted, "No chance of that happening!"
May kept running away from Drew and she kept her breathing even and steady. She saw something ahead and she skid to a halt. May looked ahead and saw that she saw an actual river with icebergs on it. She looked behind her and she saw Drew was catching up to her.
"Here it goes!" May shouted, as she started hopping over the icebergs to try and escape Drew.
Drew kept following her, with May trying her best to run. Drew kept on barking affectionately, before saying, "Rowr-rowr."
May groaned and sweat dropped as she kept running. May had soon found herself on a "Tarzan" set and she kept on running no matter where she went. May was hoping to soon get away from Drew before he got any closer.
Drew soon saw where May was going; he looked up and saw a ladder and he climbed it to figure out a classy way to win May over without any problem. Albeit his own stink was not something he was aware of.
May kept running and running, not being able to breathe for a second, trying her best to outrun Drew and get away from him.
"Aaaah-ahaaaaahh!" Drew shouted, as he swung on a vine over May, wearing a loincloth that covered everything. May skid to a halt and ran in the other direction to try and escape. "I scream to you with rainforest romance."
"That's rancid on so many levels!" May shouted as she kept on running; she found another ladder and almost flew her way up the latter as she kept trying to breathe. She lost her grip for a second, but got it back up.
Drew, meanwhile, on a trapeze, was swinging from his legs, before saying, suavely, "I'm quite the wearing flea on a trapeze, aren't I?"
May gagged as she made it to the top of the latter and kept running.
"Get away from me!" May shouted; Drew swung to the other side and he landed effortlessly before going after May once again.
May soon ran to the edge of a cliff set and her eyes went wide at how big of a drop it was. May shuddered in fear and anxiety. She had two choices: jump and severely hurt herself or submit to Drew and die from lack of oxygen due to the stink.
She turned back and saw Drew approaching her, and he kept coming at her.
"Alright, darling, enough is enough," Drew said, frustration and impatience in his voice. "Let us continue…"
"Venusaur, catch me!" May shouted, letting Venusaur out of its Poké Ball at the bottom of the set. She then jumped off the set.
"Sweetheart!" Drew shouted, as he ran over to the cliff and saw that May's Venusaur caught her in its Vine Whip.
"Great work, Venusaur," May said, as she was then let down, and then she put Venusaur back in its Poké Ball. "Seeya!"
May made a beeline for the exit, in hopes to escape her malodorous suitor. Drew, not to be discouraged, jumped down from the set and he kept chasing after May.
"Hey, wait for me!" Drew shouted, as he kept after May.
"I gotta get out of here!" May shouted, as she soon left the exit and kept running.
Drew chuckled as he then said, "Love never rests. And this girl is going to love me no matter what."
May ran, saying, "If a guy can't take a hint, give him the hint before things get worse."
Hope you liked this one! I certainly had a good time writing it. I hope to see reviews soon.