Chapter 21
"Jacob's birthday is next week."
Alice doesn't look at Edward. Her eyes stay focused on the tablet resting on her thighs. Her feet rest on the edge of the chair as her knees press against the table edge. Sitting between the two of them at the library table, Bella smiles while continuing to read.
Leaning away from the leather-bound bestiary laying in front of him, Edward watches her. It's an oddly out-of-place statement. Birthdays have never been mentioned before, not to him. His had passed with no mention, though it was his preference. Working with two ageless creatures like Bella and Emmett made the subject appear off-topic.
"I didn't know," he says. "How old is he?"
"He's turning twenty-five," Alice replies. There's an intentional playfulness in her voice.
"What are you doing for it?"
"Don't know. Same thing we always do, probably."
Edward runs his hand over the scruff of hair on his head and looks past Alice at the image of a sasquatch on the library wall. The three of them started meeting in the library for occasional study sessions while Jacob and Emmett spar. It helps Edward devise strategies for dealing with various creatures, with Alice's and Bella's expertise a boon to the process. After a harpy ambushed Edward during training, requiring Jacob to save him, the Team Leader wanted to address the limitations to his abilities.
The ARMS allows him to defend himself, but he's still a human in a world of monsters.
"What's that?" Edward asks, recognizing that Alice is leading the conversation but willing to go along.
"Bella bakes a cake."
Chuckling, Bella looks up from her binder and catches Alice glancing her way. They share a knowing grin.
"And?" Edward says.
"It's a really good cake," Alice adds. "Bella's a great baker."
"Thank you," Bella says, jokingly interjecting herself into the conversation.
"I'm sure." Edward looks a Bella, biting the inside of his lip gently. Over the months they've grown incredibly close, though nearly every day he is surprised by another aspect of her. His fascination is boundless. "But that really can't be it," he finally adds, once he realizes Alice isn't going to say any more.
"There's nothing else to do," Bella says. "Not for the whole team."
"Why not? We should go do something."
Alice finally looks up from her tablet, a look of victory on her face. "That's a great idea."
Edward can't fight the confusion as his focus moves between the two women.
"What am I missing?" he finally asks. He doesn't mind being set-up, but he cannot decipher Alice's meaning.
Bella stretches back in her chair, her hair falling over the back in a wave. Her exhale is weighted, pondering.
"I'm the only member of the team allowed to leave the facility," she says as she straightens up. The confession makes her face look tired.
"What?" Edward says without thinking. He had never seen the team outside of the facility, but never considered it was because they weren't authorized to leave. The realization he rarely thought of anyone other than Bella when he left at night makes the revelation even harder to swallow.
Alice shrugs, reading Edward's embarrassment in his body. "Lilim policy is that only prior humans can leave for non-mission purposes."
"Really?" Edward finds the rule asinine.
Bella nods with a sigh.
After a moment of thought Edward shakes his head. "You were raised human though," he says to Alice.
"I've always been an oracle," she says with a measure pride. "It's genetic. And that's where the rule comes from." She throws her hands out to her sides, putting herself on mock display. "Not human."
His chin juts forward and his eyes narrow. The embarrassment that he never realized the policy, or never cared to invite the whole team out in the months he has been with Lilim, boils in the back of his mind. The word failure flashes through his brain. He cares about the team, enjoys spending time with time, but it's not enough. The sensation that he blindly accepted that the team could only spend time together in the facility infuriates him. He stands.
"I'll be right back," he says as he walks out of the library.
With purposeful strides he heads to the Colonel's office. A rush of frustration makes his vision swim. A hard exhale through his nose allows him to refocus as wraps his knuckles loudly against the door. His teeth clench.
"Enter."
Deliberately slowing his movement, relaxing his face, Edward does so.
"Do you have a minute, sir?" His voice effectively hides his frustration.
Colonel Cullen nods while he continues typing.
Sitting, Edward takes the opportunity to force himself calm while he struggles with how to approach the topic. He wants to scream against the injustice but knows how pointless that would be. Does he explain that the team told him about the policy? Lie and say he read it somewhere?
"What can I help you with, Captain?" Carlisle stops typing and turns to Edward.
Edward focuses only on his composure while he instinctively speaks. "Agent Griefs' birthday is coming up." Using the team's code names feels unnatural to him, but it's the best way to discuss the team with the senior officer.
"Really," Colonel Cullen says, a flash of genuine surprise on his face.
"Yes, sir." Edward still isn't sure how to direct the conversation, but keeps talking. "I would like to give the team off that day so we can celebrate."
"I have no problem with that."
"Thank you." Fighting the sudden pounding in his chest, Edward speaks as casually as possible. "I think it would be fun to have the team at my place, anyway."
The Colonel's face tightens as he watches Edward. "That I disagree with."
But the Colonel doesn't say, 'No.' Edward plays naive, forcing a quizzical turn of his head. "Is it a matter of control?" he asks, knowing the answer.
"Lilim Division does not authorize those of a non-human nature out of the facility for non-mission reason." Carlisle's statement is pointed; an indirect order.
"Sir," Edward starts, seeing his argument form as he speaks, "If I am trusted to lead the team on a mission, I can be trusted to have them in my house."
Carlisle suddenly looks bored. "There are too many variables. What happens on a mission can generally be managed. There's little collateral. Letting any of the creatures out just because is a risky policy that I cannot condone."
Edward fights his passion with professionalism, "They will be in my house, which Lilim monitors, and I will be there."
"That's not enough."
A throbbing in Edward's head accompanies the solution the moment he thinks of it. Intentionally, fighting his instinct, he shrugs. "Give me the Kill-Switch, then."
The Colonel says nothing, but leans back in his chair. His eyes narrow.
"Issue me the Kill-Switch," Edward says, obviously. "I will receive it eventually. Whoever is watching my house can do so during the party. If anything happens, anything at all, I'll terminate." The words hurt.
The senior officer rotates his chair, revealing his stoic profile as he continues to silently ponder.
"I'll drive the team myself so there won't be an issue with them driving away. We'll hold it only during daylight." In his mind, Edward prepares answers to any other questions that may arise.
"Meet with me tomorrow," Colonel Cullen says, curtly.
"Thank you, sir." Edward quickly exits. In the empty hall, he exhales. His heart pounds through satisfaction, knowing his argument is valid. But he actually asked for the Kill-Switch. The fact echoes through his mind like his footsteps as he heads back to the library. Deep breaths barely grant him composure.
He presses his palm against the wall, the blue flash granting him access as he quickly enters. Focused only on the chair, he plops down as a sudden exhaustion overwhelms him.
After a while, he realizes Bella is the only one there. She watches him quietly.
"Where's Alice?"
"Where else?" Bella says. "How did it go?"
Her voice relaxes him. He appreciates that she knows what he did without having to explain it. "Good. I should have an answer tomorrow."
"Then why do you look like you just lost a fight?"
Her smirk causes him to laugh, which he makes disappear with a defeated sigh. He frowns and makes eye contact with her. The trust and understanding in her eyes continuously make him feel safe. He gently pinches his lower lip, trying to force his confidence.
"I asked for the Kill Switch," he says, looking away from her. The admission feels like a betrayal.
"Thank you," Bella says, closing her book. "I know how hard that was for you."
"He was concerned about control," Edward starts, the need to justify gnawing at him.
Bella cuts him off. "I understand. You don't need to explain. Thank you."
Edward smiles, her maturity and acceptance a constant surprise. Every time he looks at her he forgets her age and experience. "Jacob deserves it."
"He does," Bella says. "So does Alice. So do you. It really means a lot that you would do that; give the team something they typically don't get."
"To get out of here?"
"To be normal."
"You are normal," Edward says, quickly.
Bella stands and takes the book back its spot on the shelf to hide her blush. She stands looking at the picture of chucacabra hanging on the wall, but not really paying attention to it.
"Have you read my profile?" she asks.
"No. I haven't read any of the team's profiles. You know that."
A flutter in her heart as she smiles to herself. "Read about mandarugos?"
"I've avoided it." He doesn't have to say why. It's the same reason he hasn't read the profiles.
Bella looks at her watch. It's after five. She turns to him and watches him warmly.
"Come with me," she finally says.
They exit the library. She walks slowly, taking her time. Edward doesn't rush her. Silently, they move through the hall, the lobby and to the elevator.
Bella glances at her watch as they ride to the surface. This always changes things. Her heart pounds. She tightens her jaw to steady her breathing. She wants him to touch her, wrap his arm around her. Ignore their profession for a split moment and just be.
He slides his hand deep into his pocket, shackling himself from his instinct they only way he knows how.
They walk out into the dusk together. The sun, hiding behind the trees, throws a brilliant gradient of red to purple far across the cloudless sky. Bella can't take her eyes off it.
Perfect, she thinks.
She starts across the grass towards the trees, Edward a step behind. As the world around them darkens, the yellow glints of fireflies appear among the foliage.
Stopping a few feet from the brush, Bella lifts her hair off her back with both hands to reveal the zippers on the back of her tank top.
"Could you?"
Edward obliges, absently placing a light hand against her side to brace against his gentle tug.
It's the first time he's touched her that way. Bella closes her eyes and focuses on the sensation, willing her nerves to move it throughout her body.
"There," he says.
"Thank you." She turns to face him, smiling. She hears her own heart pound.
Edward hears his own heart pound, gazing at Bella in the setting sun. Excited. Terrified. Unsure of how he'll react. Some of the creatures he's seen, in training and in pictures, have been horrific. Bella's hesitancy to expose this part of herself has unnerved him, intrigued him. Knowing it's now going to happen, he tries to prepare for the worst.
It's Bella, he thinks. It will always be Bella.
She glances at her watch. The grass whispers beneath her as she sits.
"We have a few more minutes." She watches the sky while moving her single palm hovers back and forth over the blades of grass. Their tips graze gently against her skin.
Edward joins her on the ground. They sit with their legs outstretched, inches from entwining.
"You can't control it?" Edward asks out of genuine curiosity and an effort to fill the silence.
Bella shakes her head and smiles at him. "I wish I could. It happens at sun down."
"And you turn back at sun up?"
"Yeah."
"Do you sleep at all?" The question surprises Edward. Of all the things he wants to know, why ask that first?"
Bella gives a slight laugh. "Of course. I'll perch somewhere and nap most nights then get a couple more hours of sleep when I get back."
"Where do you go?"
"Anywhere." She looks to the sky again. "I actually like the flying. I can cover a few hundred miles in a night."
A grimace crosses her face as the pang in her gut hits.
"What?" Edward asks.
"It's starting." She quickly reaches down and pulls off her boots, tossing them against a nearby tree before she stands. Lost in the moment with Edward, the transformation comes as a surprise. She turns away from him.
Edward stands and steps back. "Does it hurt?"
She grunts a response as she shakes her head, focusing on the changes in her body.
She grows taller before Edward's eyes, her feet lengthening. He cannot take his eyes from the hand-like growths emerging from her back, reaching into the newly night sky. It's fascinating and grotesque.
It's Bella, he reminds himself.
Skin stretches. Her back arches. Hands clench. Release. She takes a breath and turns.
Aware of his reaction, Edward fights for stoicism. The ridges running along her forehead and cheeks distort the shape of her face. The needled teeth protruding from her lips are threatening and dangerous. The turn of nose looks like a cavern in her face.
Her eyes remain, the deep brown that seem brighter against the new shadows running along her face.
Edward smiles. "Hey."