"Think like a queen. A queen is not afraid to fail. Failure is another stepping stone to greatness." Oprah Winfrey.

Warning: Comedic violence.

A/N: If you don't know who Brig. Gen. Olivier Armstrong is...she's a commanding officer from Briggs which is located in the North. She think's Roy's an idiot and Roy thinks she's a bitch, but worthy of being hit on. She's Armstrong's older sister.

"So how was your date last night?" Breda said as he and Havoc walked down the hall ready to start the working day.

Havoc pulled out a cigarette and sighed. "Awful as usual." He lit up the tobacco stick and breathed in deeply.

"What happened? The colonel saunter in and steal your girl...again."

"No, this time I drove her away all on my own. It's not a good sign when the first thing she says when she wakes up next to you is, 'My god what have I done! I have to stop drinking!'"

Breda smirked and put a hand on his friends shoulder. "Don't you think you're exaggerating."

Havoc brushed the hand off his shoulder. "Only a little, that's the messed up thing." They reached their office door when something caught his eye. A voluptuous brunette in a skirt military uniform was heading towards them.

Breda turned. "Hmm, she must be new."

Havoc nodded his head in agreement as he started to drool. "Hubba hubba, I didn't know angels were aloud in the military."

"Please don't use that as your pick up line." Breda said.

A grin spread on Havoc's face, as he grabbed Breda's shoulder and shook him. "Don't you see, it's a sign, a good omen! I'm going to introduce myself to her."

"This will be interesting." Breda decided to stall on going into the office.

Roy and Riza walked down the hall like they had so many times before. Roy kept tugging at her skirt to add length as Riza giggled.

"Ma'am calm down it's going to be okay."

Roy paused from altering her attire and glared at the blonde. "Can't you just call me sir?"

"That would be against protocol. I just thought something, we can't keep referring to you as Roy." She stroked her chin as she thought about the possibilities.

"What's wrong with Roy?"

"It's a man's name...how about...hmm...Roy-ko, Royko?"

The brunette paused in her tracks. "How did you know my real name?" Her eyes grew big and her hands covered her mouth when she realized what she said.

Riza burst out laughing, something quite uncharacteristic, that caused several heads to turn. "Royko, that's your real name? That's a woman's name!" She started to laugh harder. "I mean, what about, Ronald, or Roland, or hell just Roy! What's your middle name Scarlett!"

"Shut up Elizabeth, remember while we're here I am your boss, I control your paycheck!" That got the blonde to promptly stop laughing.

They saw Havoc gunning their way, with what could be called fire in his eyes. Roy just wanted to run the other way and avoid the two toned blond. But, Riza grabbed on to her arm and prohibited her from leaving. After what seemed like hours to Roy, Havoc finally reached the female duo.

Havoc saluted the pair and cleared his throat. "Good morning Lt. Hawkeye, whose your friend?" He raised his eyebrows suggestively and Roy grimaced. "I didn't know they let angels in the military." He said and somewhere he swore he heard 'I can't believe he said that!' in the background."

Roy's face grew red and she turned to Riza for help. "We'll discuss this when we get in the office.

Falman, Furey, Breda, and Havoc all took their seats and stared at the women in front of them.

Riza cleared her throat and gripped onto her favorite pistol, Old Reliable, as she started to speak. "Your probably wondering who this is next to me. Well...this is Colonel Mustang."

The room went deathly quiet and the men all looked at each other. "I didn't know the colonel had a sister?" Furey squeaked out as he adjusted his glasses.

"He doesn't."

Again, an awkward silence filled the room.

"Roy?" Breda said out loud and saw the brunette's face grow red.

Mustang cleared her throat and took an authoritative stance. "Yes, it's me Colonel Roy Mustang Flame Alchemist. As you may notice I am a woman." She stated this rather bluntly with a straight expression. "Something strange happened and I woke up this way. I'm currently trying to find some way to get back to normal, but, I still need to work. You men said you would follow me through hell, well welcome to it, and you can't take back what you already promised." She moved her hands to her hips and glared at her group.

Breda leaned over to whipser in Havoc's ear. "So, your destiny it to be with a female version of Mustang?" As he looked at his commanding officer from her skirt to her heeled shoes.

Havoc shrugged. "Well at least I won't loose her to Roy, plus Mustang makes a hot woman." Breda moved his chair a few inches away from his friend.

After the shocking announcement everyone started, or attempted, to focus on their work. Edward Elric decided to make his grand entrance then by throwing the door open. "Where is Col. Bastard, I got a bone to pick with that prick." He didn't even wait for an answer, he just stormed over to Roy's connected office. He proceeded to throw the door open again and dramatically pointed a finger in the colonel's desk vicinity. "Why the hell did you cut my research budget Colonel Bastard." His voice faded when he saw a woman who looked almost exactly like Roy Mustang. "Or should I say Colonel Bitch." He smiled, his array had worked, this was going to be good.

A/N: Okay happy Easter, here's my gift to you. Next chapter Olivier inspects Roy's unit and Hughes get jealous. I will be u[dating my other stories soon, so stay tuned! Please read and review!