(A/N I should probably tell you that there are spoilers to season 12 in here but if you haven't been watching season 12 you SO should it is really really good. I hope you are enjoying this and it should be fun watching Tony recover and get back some spunk. I hope you enjoy this chapter and as always thank you for all the alerts and likes and comments they mean so much)

They sat quiet for a few minutes digesting the information that Gibbs told them. McGee was the first to speak, " I am sorry Gibbs, I could see how much he was struggling with Ziva leaving, I should have been a better friend and maybe if I would have.."

Gibbs stopped him, "No Tim, don't okay, don't play the what if game or you will drive you crazy, believe me. Could we have been a better more attentive family to him? Hell yes! Will we learn from this and appreciate the second chance we have with him? You better believe it. We all know in this job depression is a very real thing for anyone but factor in the years that Tony has had none of us should be surprised but we will be there for him every step of the way."

Ellie looks confused, "Shouldn't the annual Psych evals we have to go through have caught some of the warning signs? I mean isn't that why we go through those every year?"

Gibbs just smiled and looked at his hands. Abby noticed how hard it was for Gibbs to answer her so she took it on herself to answer for him, "You are still new and you haven't really scratched the surface of our Tony, he is the most sought after under cover agent because he is so adept at showing you only what he wants you to see. Those Psych evals are like play time for Tony. He only shows them what they need to see to approve him to go into the field."

Ellie looked at McGee and Gibbs for conformation on what Abby said. Gibbs let out a small sad little laugh, "Yeah, not a lot of people take the time to look past the playboy and see the real Tony. I hope you get a chance to see the real Tony, he is a good guy."

The conversation was interrupted by the arrival of Jimmy Palmer, Ducky and the Director. Gibbs looked at the Director and then at Ducky accusingly. Vance noticed the look and held up his hand to placate Gibbs, "I was in autopsy this morning when Ducky got the call about Tony and so I came with him to see how he is?"

Gibbs sighed, "He is alive, that is all I know, we have been here several hours and no one has told me anything after I signed the release for surgery."

Vance looked to Ducky, "Dr. Mallard would you go and see if you can find out any information for us and Gibbs come with me and lets talk for a minute."

Ducky left and Gibbs hung his head in defeat then stood up to follow Vance into an adjoining empty office. "Listen Leon, Tony has been through crap pretty much since you took over as Director and he never got to recover from the crap Jen put him through. From being afloat not to mention the shenanigans the old Sec Nav put him through the agency owes him some grace in this."

Vance let him talk himself out, "I know Gibbs, if you would have given me a second I would have pretty much said the same thing. I cannot ignore this, he is going to have to get help but I will work with him and you okay. You both have enough vacation and sick time to almost take a year off work and if he needs it we can put in on disability until he can get right. I know DiNozzo and I didn't see eye to eye at first but I do know how important he is to the MCRT and to NCIS as a whole. I am willing to put whatever resources we need into him getting better. You have my word on that. I just wanted you to know that as long as he gets the help he needs he will always have a place on MCRT and NCIS okay?"

Gibbs had to swallow hard to keep the emotion out of his voice, "Thank you Director, I will make sure he gets the help he needs."

Vance stood and patted his shoulder, "I know what he means to you, I didn't understand at first but now I do and know you have whatever recourses you need to help him, we will get him back on your six where he belongs."

Gibbs smiled as he followed Vance back to the waiting room. When Gibbs took his place back with Abby McGee and Abby gave him a questioning look, wondering what Vance had said but Gibbs just smiled at them both and let them know it wasn't bad.

It took Ducky another thirty minutes before he came back into the waiting room with a young woman in a lab coat and scrubs. "This is Dr. Markham everyone she is the chief facial and nerve doctor here at Bethesda. Doctor these are Anthony's family and friends."

The young woman looked to be in her late thirties, she smiled and pulled a chair in the middle of the little group, "Agent DiNozzo was brought in early this morning with a gun shot wound to the right temple. Thankfully Agent DiNozzo had been drinking pretty heavily, I fear if he hadn't been so drunk his aim would have been much better, as it is he has managed to take a pretty good hunk of his face off on the right temple. We had to repair a bunch of little vessels and we have managed to close his wound up to the point it should leave minimal scaring and what scaring it does leave if he just grows his hair out a little longer it should cover it well. The only long-term effect of this is a marked decrease in his hearing on the right side. Although it is probably going to be a significant deficit it should not affect his return to the field once he takes care of the other issues at play. I want you all to realize that in all suicide attempts the patient is held in house for a period of a week to set up a care plan and be evaluated. Since he will need to be in the hospital that long for his injuries we can probably do it all at once if he is willing to work with us. I know you all care deeply for Agent DiNozzo but today I would feel better if just one of you stayed with him and helped him. Dad, I think that would be best if it was you unless there is a Ms. DiNozzo."

Gibbs shook his head and smiled, he secretly loved when people mistook him for his Dad, in his heart that is exactly what he was, "No worries Doc I will stay with him and talk to him about everything. It would probably be better received coming from me. I also have a psychiatrist who has worked with him successfully before that I would like to call in if that would be agreeable."

"Absolutely, just get me her contact information and I will have it set up on my end. Your boy will be in his room in about ten minutes and I will have someone come and get you when you can go back."

Gibbs stood up when the doc did and shook her hand, "Thank you for everything."

She went to walk away then stopped and turned back to Gibbs, "My Dad was a cop for 40 years, I saw how the job effected him but he made it because he had a family that loved him and so will your boy." With a smile from both parties she left.

Gibbs took a deep breath, "Okay since you all aren't going to be able to see Tony yet I need for you all to help me with something. Leon, can you call Dr. Cranston and tell her about Tony and ask her if she would come and evaluate him and work with the Psych dept here on his treatments?" Leon nodded and patted Gibbs shoulder as he left the room.

"Ducky, will you work with Leon and when Dr. Cranston agrees to help Tony get what ever information who ever needs?"

"Ellie, McGee and Palmer, will you (handing McGee a key) take my truck and move some of Tony's essentials into the guest bedroom at my house try and set what you think he would need to feel at home. He is going to be staying with me for a while."

"Abby, will you work on calling Senior and letting him know he was hurt on the job and will be at my house for a while. Don't tell him about the self-inflicted part if Tony wants him to know then fine but it isn't our place to tell him. Oh and you have my credit card so can you call and have internet and cable set up at my place and especially in the living room and in Tony's room."

Abby gave a mock salute and then a coy smile as she replayed the words "Tony's room" in her mind. She gave him a big hug then whispered in his ear, "You two are going to heal each others hearts. I am so proud of you my Silver Fox"

Gibbs just smiled a little smile at her words then ushered everyone out of the waiting room, he was finally alone again and had just enough time to take a few deep breathes when the nurse came to get him so he could go see Tony.

When he got into the quiet room Tony was lying in bed with his eyes closed pretending to be asleep. He had a nasal cannula on and a huge turban of bandages around his head. Gibbs sat next to Tony and gently held the other mans hand. "You are a top notch under cover agent but I can still tell when you are faking sleep."

Tony didn't respond he just went on pretending he was asleep, "That's okay you can keep resting, I know you need it. I know I am a functional mute but I am going to try and not be for a while, you are worth it. I let you down Tony and I am so sorry."

Tony scrunched up his brow and looked at Gibbs. "There are those green eyes, I let you down Tony and I am sorry. I thank God I was given a chance to make things right with you."

Tony shook his head no and when he stopped his head he began to cry, "Boss you..it is me, I am a failure no one sticks around for me and well I got tired and it wasn't your fault it was me boss." Tony closed his eyes to try and stop the tears but they silently flowed down his cheeks.

Gibbs reached up and gently wiped the tears away and let his hand rest on his cheek, "Anthony, I know you have been through so much but not everyone has left you, you still have me, Abby, McGee, Palmer and Ducky and we all love you very much."

Tony wiped hard at his face and hissed as he hit his bandaged wound. Gibbs took his hand and placed it on his belly, "You might not want to do that for a while."

Tony looked at Gibbs, "Why are you here? My own father will barely recognize I exist and every woman I have ever loved starting with my Mom and ending with Ziva have left me. Hell I can't even kill myself right. I am useless and a screw up just like my Dad used to tell me. He used to ask me why anyone would ever love me and (sniff sniff) I used to think he was just a drunk bastard who didn't know what he was saying but now I can see he was right."

Tony startled when he got a hard swat on the leg. It made him stop and look at his boss in shock.

"Well, I cant smack your head right now and you are sitting on your ass so your leg is the best option I had. Now normally I would tell you I would only say this once but given the circumstance I will say it as often as you need to hear it. I love you very much. You are the son of my heart. Even your Dad admitted last time he was here that I have been more of a father to you than he has. And you Anthony DiNozzo are the most important thing to me. Remember when the director told you to keep the threat on my life quiet from me because we just lost Jack and you didn't, you told me like a good son. I stormed into the directors office and (pause for emotion check) and told him that you are all I have left now and he had no right to tell you to keep things from me."

Tony tried to say something profound but he looked at Gibbs and mouthed, "Sorry" then after a few steading breathes he looked at Gibbs, "Can I ask you something really non manly?"

Gibbs smiled, "it is just you and me in here DiNozzo if we go a little girly no one has to know."

Tony laughed through the still falling tears, "Can I have a hug boss?"

Gibbs carefully sat on the edge of the bed and gently pulled his senior agent into a gentle but firm hug with Tony's face buried in his chest and his hands fisting in the material on the back of his shirt and the two men sat and held each other. Tony gathering strength from the older man and Gibbs appreciating the feel of a very alive Tony in his arms and promised himself to do anything in his power to keep him that way.