Summary: It's almost exactly three years after Edward left Bella. She's turning twenty-one, and she's completely different from the Bella Edward left. She's bold, uninhibited, experienced, and has lost almost all of her good manners. She's been hardened by what life handed her after Edward left her. Will Edward accept this new Bella? Bella's not as forgiving as she used to be; will she refuse Edward when he tries to redeem himself for her? Rated M for language and maybe for future chapters. A little OOC.

Chapter One

BPOV

I was annoyed. Seriously fucking annoyed. How hard is it to be on time? I thought angrily, looking at my kitchen clock for what must have been the umpteenth time. I sighed irritably, not that anyone could hear me over the blaring hip-hop playing. Seriously, whatever random person decided to become a D.J. better fucking reconsider his career choice. Tonight was my 21st birthday party, not that I was the one to throw it. It was a surprise "pre-party" as my current boy-toy Derek Dejonavich put it. From what few whispers I've heard, Derek, myself, and a few close friends are going to downtown Los Angeles to check out some clubs, then head out to the Nocturnal Festival. I sincerely hope the rumours are true - at least for the Nocturnal Festival. It's was something I wanted to attend for a long ass time.

Suddenly, my Sidekick vibrated. Glancing at it, I realized it was the source of my annoyance. I grabbed it and walked outside, where I could hear the motherfucker drone on and on about fucking traffic issues. You can't bullshit a bullshitter, buddy, I thought.
Now that I was outside, I could vaguely make out the ringtone. Black and Blue by Bring Me The Horizon. Sighing, I answered the phone.

"Hello?" I asked with as much irritation as I could put in the two measly syllables.

"Bella! God, I'm so sorry! Me… me mum had another attack and I had to get her to the hospital. I know I should've called but I was just so worried and distracted and goddamnit, this is your fucking party that I threw and I'm just so sorry," ranted Benen O'Keenon, somewhat breathlessly. I could hear the sincere apology in his tone and my cold heart melted a little. He was my best friend; I couldn't be mad at him, not when his mother was always in and out of the hospital with heart attacks.

"Benen, sweetie, it's fine. Really, it is. You don't worry about me, got it? The party is great, I love it," I reassured, lying a tad at the end. I hated having parties at my house - they made me paranoid as fuck.

"Are you sure, lass? By god, I'm a sorry son of a bitch. I will be there, I swear to ye," he promised, his Irish accent melting my heart further. That fucking accent was the reason why I could never say no to this kid. But he was always there, especially when I needed him the most, which was quite often. All things considered, it made sense that Benen means 'kind'.

"All right, but feel free to stay with your mom if she needs it, okay?" I didn't want him to be distracted by something as trivial as my birthday. It wasn't all that important, in comparison.

"Ay, ay, I will, if it comes to it. I'll call you a little later, then. Bye." Click and the line was dead. I sighed and walked back up the driveway, ignoring the aching feeling in my heart. I could always feel it more insistently and more painfully on my birthdays. I promised myself I wouldn't let myself get sucked back into the memories, but I really couldn't help it. Falling onto a little bench in the small woodsy area by my house, I clutched my chest and tried to keep my heart from falling out. That motherfucker always had a way of finding me in my weakest moments, even if he was…well, I didn't know where he his. But thanks to those oh-so-kind parting words of his, I knew he wouldn't be anywhere close to me.

I closed my eyes tightly, trying my very hardest not to envision him. My cold-skinned archangel. I was almost breathless with the pain. After almost a year and a half without thinking too much about him, the pain was….unbearable.

"Edward," I whispered. I felt myself sway and then everything went black.

EPOV

"Bella," I moaned as I collapsed to the ground, accidentally shattering a small boulder in the process. I was done tracking; it was fruitless. I had lost track of Victoria. I could no longer see the point in my being away from my Bella - my heart, my soul. Being away from her was the very worst type of torture. Physically, it was very hard for my kind to feel any sort of pain. But ever since I left her, I've had a constant, hollow ache where my un-beating heart should be. I had forced myself to imagine the image of Jasper lunging at her during her eighteenth birthday party. That image was the only thing that helped keep me away for three years. Today was Bella's twenty-first birthday. Now she could legally drink and gamble, if she wanted to. I groaned. I regretted my decision to leave her, although I still feel as if it was the best thing to do. She would never live a safe, normal human life surrounded by vampires. Now, she was free to marry and have kids. I flinched at the thought of Bella with another, but chuckled humourlessly at the realization that it was what I wanted for her. At least, that's what I've been telling myself.
Without her, my life was completely unbearable. I was too pathetic to even stay with my family anymore. I couldn't stand knowing that Jasper was forced to feel all the pain I was suffering through, that Esme would feel utterly helpless, that Carlisle would feel as if he'd failed me. I owed them better than that, and that's why I left on an indefinite hunting trip. Of course, I checked in regularly, but I couldn't ignore them pleading for my return. They cared about me much more than I deserved. And then there was Alice. I told her not to keep tabs on Bella, but I knew she would occasionally check in and torture me with what she saw.

"Edward, one of Bella's closest friends past away. She's heartbroken."
"She has another new boyfriend. She obviously doesn't care for him and their relationship will last, if I'm correct, about 26 days, 8 hours, and 3.5 minutes."
"She's taking classes to improve her balance. She's really doing quite well; she doesn't trip over her own feet anymore!"
"Edward, she…had sex for the first time. She appears to feel broken up about it. Please, go to her. I know she misses you." I flinched at that memory.

Each time she would start to talk about her, I'd be sorely tempted to hang up, but hearing about her was like a drug for me - it tempted me nearly as much as her blood would.

I got up from my kneeling position on the jungle floor. I was somewhere in South America. Apparently, my lead on Victoria was completely wrong. I let out a roar of frustration, causing all the animals in a five mile radius to run away. I wasn't going to do this anymore; I had to go back to Bella and ask for her forgiveness, even if I had to get on my knees and beg. I turned north and began running, already formulating a plan. I would redeem myself for Bella.

Hint hint: I like reviews(: I'm still not entirely sure where I'm going to have this story head, to maybe some opinions/ideas would help my, uh, "creative process". :D

BTW, Bella and her friends live in North Hills in California.