I write it by listening in a continuous loop battlefield of jordansparks.
-730 days (two years ago)
My father just beat me. I lose blood from a most everywhere on my body. Outside, it's raining however I am in the rain wondering why. Why my mother watched at him without moving the little finger? Why did I deserve it? Why me?
It has been a long time since that start. When I disappoint him with my notes, or with my language which he thinks unacceptable or with almost all the thing I do. He always says that it's because he loves me, because he wants me to be the best. Because he doesn't want me to have the same life he had. A nice and rich man will propose to me he says; and then I would be happy that my father beats me because I would be finally happy and with a lot money.
Did I believe it? A little bit. No really. Not at all.
I didn't think that I was worthy for somebody. I am not the prettiest, I am not a good cook, I'm not the thinnest... I don't have true talent. Tyson, a boy, from school says it to me several times by days. However, Im glue him, I am practically every day his home. What interests me at his house? It's his brother Hiro.
Hiro is nicer, older and more mature. Sometimes, when I go to Tyson residences, he was there. He helped me to take too high objects for me on a shelf. Without speaking he was smiled at me every time he saw me.
It was a day of summer the first time when we really talk him; I had just seen my report card of the end of the year. It was really good I got all A +, but my professor of plastic arts had written a comment.
Comment: Hilary, you are very talented I'm sure that if you give your hundred percent in class I am sure that you will be able to become next Van Gogh.
My father therefore understood by this that I did not work enough in class. Therefore, I had the worst of the punishments that I had my life. My father locked me up in the basement without eating.
At the end of the fourth day, my mother opened the door. She says to me: come with me. She took me to the garage and we went up in the auto of my father. She has driven for hours without addressing me the slightest word. I did not dare to open the radio, Her, my mother, never beat me, but she had inform more than once twice to my father my "unacceptable" activities.
It was dark when the auto stopped in front of Macdonald, I still had not eaten. My mother tells me to wait for him. I have already slobbered internally. I imagined the hot meat, the sauce, the vegetables which are in great majority a leaf of lettuce hacked in at the farthest and the edge of tomato which would soon fill my belly. The waiting for my mother to come back was making me crazy.
My mother came back with a doggy bag, I waited for her to gives something but nothing. It ate the sandwich, drunk the soda and finaly she eat the French fries one by one making sure to dipped each one into the ketchup. Meanwhile, my belly made gurgled, I followed with my eyes her mouth which chewed the food.
When she have finished, she threw the bag by the window and says to me your father my said that you of must eat nothing.
I said nothing; I knew that if I said somethings would be worse later when him would be there. She drive for a long time to hush my hunger I fell asleep. When the car stopped shortly, I woke up, we were in the wood. My paternal was near a tree, he looked at me fixedly. He wave to tell us we walk to join him. He says to me that I had too easy life it is why he had left me, in the middle of nowhere. He left therefore with my mother. I stayed there. Alone. Lost and discouraged from life.
I have walked for half an hour when I sit down on the ground. I had no more force. A single car passed on the road, but didn't want to take me. I devoured all that was on a small bush of wild raspberry which I had found. I decided therefore to search a place to sleep as I did not find it I slept on the land.
When I woke up, I was in a bed with a hot sheet encircling me such a delicate hug. He smelt nice of egg and smoked bacon in air. I followed the smell to see that it was a young man who cooked, I had already seen him at Tyson place it was his elder brother. It was Hiro.
- So Hilary you woke up? Do you want to eat?
I moved the head as a sign of yes. While I ate, he says nothing. In the bottom of me, I thought: What he wanted me? Why was so nice with me? Was he a psychopath? After all, we were alone in a small villa. He is going to kill me. This did not frighten me because I was not worth being lived.
He did not kill me. I was a bit disappointed.
He asked me why I was there so I told him my entire story. He listened to me from start to finish. And there he asked me if I wanted to live with him at his grandfather. I accepted immediately
The life in the dojo was marvellous; Hiro was to the university therefore he came to see me from time to time and every time with a surprise, he made me felt special. Tyson was every day there to get on my nerve, but it is because he likes me everybody knows it. For proof he pled me to go out with him and I accepted, but in the bottom of me I like and I love Hiro.
I hope that she you liked and understood why Hilary is with Tyson.
This were old pages of her newspaper