A/N: Okay, this is a funny chapter! ;) To make up for the nasty one that made me want to cry like a baby. Also, sorry it's so late, my sister was showing me a really funny film and distracted me from my writing! :( It won't happen again, I promise!
Laxus: Whatever Niko. You lazy ass writer, probably didn't want to write more. How come I'm not in this chapter bitch?
Niko: *death glares*
Laxus: You think you can scare me?
Niko: *glare intensifies*
Laxus: W-What the hell? Q-quit it you social introvert!
Niko: Just remember, Laxus. I decide who you end up with... maybe a relationship with Natsu is on the cards if you continue.
Laxus: *blood disappears from face* You wouldn't.
Niko: Wouldn't I? *grins evilly*
Natsu: NOOOOOOOOO! WHY MEEEE?! LAXUS SAY SORRY! FIGHT ME!
Lucy: Shut up! All of you! They want to read the story already, so quit fighting. *intense death glare meets silence* Thank you. Please enjoy the story, and Niko would like to remind everyone she doesn't own Fairy Tail, or else it would be more wackier than it already is, somehow. Oh, and please enjoy and leave a nice comment, because it makes her smile like a goofball and Mira and Master want more blackmail photos.
Niko: LUCY! NOOOOOOOoooooooo!
(Not usually my thing, but thought you might enjoy the humour, plus it hopefully makes up for the late update! sorry again!)
Master's POV
I reached up to the tall stack, and carefully placed the last piece of completed paperwork on top. It towered above me, and I'd piled two tables and a chair on top of one another to reach the top.
I heard a knock on the door, and grinned as I called for them to come in.
'Hello Mira. Look! It's finished!' I cried out, grinning widely as tears leaked out of my eyes. She smiled at me as she skipped forward, sitting herself down in the chair as she smirked at me. I narrowed my eyes, wondering what my meddlesome matchmaker child had done.
'That's wonderful Master. Well, Laxus can help you from now on, he won't need to help Lucy anymore.' She giggled and winked at me, sitting back smugly.
I felt my face grow pale and serious as I took in what she'd said.
'What? Mira, where's Laxus? Where's Lucy?' She hadn't noticed my serious expression, as she grinned happily, her eyes shut gently as she pictured something in her mind.
'Oh, Lucy's at her house with Bickslow. Laxus is in the storeroom still.' She stifled her giggle, and I knew then what she'd done.
Mira was usually a very considerate and smart woman, who was always ready to understand my actions, however she had seriously misjudged most of what I'd been trying to do by having Laxus train with Lucy. When Mira found her ultimate ship, she turned into a mad woman, obsessing over them being together by any means possible. She was desperate to be a godmother.
Cana had been the brunt of her ultimate shipping when she and Bacchus had been caught drinking together by Mira in one of the back rooms.
It hadn't gone well.
No wonder I haven't seen Cana lately... I thought as I sat down, staring at Mira, waiting for her to calm down.
'Mira, what did you do?' I sighed sadly, waiting for the inevitable.
'Oh, Bickslow was training Lucy first, then Laxus comes along and demands she train with him, so I had Laxus... stay out of it today, so Bickslow and Lucy have their private time. You won't interrupt with my ship, Master. I shall have god-babies with brown eyes and black-blue hair. Wouldn't they be beautiful?' She stared into the distance, ending her threatening sentence with a dreamy sigh, imagining the babies Bickslow and Lucy could have.
I frowned, not having noticed the affection the two shared, yet now it was clear to me, however, that same affection was found between Laxus and Lucy too.
'Mira, I asked Laxus to train Lucy. She needs his training if she wants to control her magic from now onwards. I only hope she hasn't had any adverse effects from not having her session with him today.' I watched as her face went from that of smug pleasure to one of shock and confusion.
'What?' She squeaked out, blinking rapidly to hold back her tears. She was returning to normal Mira now, having realised how important Lucy's training with Laxus was.
'Master, what do you mean? Is Lucy okay? Please tell me! Oh Mavis what have I done!?' She was hyperventilating and shaking as she sobbed. I quickly walked around my desk and patted her shoulder, smiling sadly as she flung her arms around my neck and sobbed onto my shoulder.
'Mira, you are a wonderful woman, and I understand your desire to see everyone happily paired off, but this is too much.' She nodded and sniffed, slowly stopping her tears, before she pulled away.
'Okay, where did you hide Laxus?' She giggled slightly.
'I smacked him with a frying pan and tied him up in the storeroom.' My eyes widened slightly before I my laughter burst out.
'We'd better go get him, he won't be pleased.' I chuckled, imagining how mad he would be at being defeated by a cooking implement.
'I also took pictures Master, good blackmail material?' She asked, showing me the print outs of my grandson tied and gagged on the floor, a red welt forming on the back of his head. I smirked as I gave her a thumbs up.
Sometimes, Mira and I were so in sync with our devious minds.
However...
You won't win this ship, my dear brat...I want my beautiful grandchildren more...
Natsu's POV
'Happy! Let's go see if Lucy's back!'
'AYE!' He shouted after me, following as I jogged along the canal, heading for my partners house with a job clutched in my hands.
Lucy's POV
I sniffed, finally having stopped crying.
Wow, I had no idea Bickslow had such a horrid past... his poor brothers... Just the thought was bringing fresh tears to my eyes. I gave him another squeeze before gently pulling away, his hands immediately releasing me, and he looked away, flushed slightly.
I then noticed how I was pretty much lying on top of him, shoving him back into the sofas arms rest. I was almost straddling his lap, and I squeaked in surprise, before scrambling off of him, accidently kneeing him in an unsavoury place...
'Ahh-' He groaned out, his voice slightly high pitched as he keeled forwards, clutching at his umm, little-not-so-little friend I'd just acquainted with my knee.
'Oh my God! Bix I'm SO SORRY! I'll get you some ice or... something.' I felt my face turn bright red as he lay on the floor, groaning as he clutched between his legs in pain. His babies were floating by his head cackling before flying to follow me into the kitchen.
I opened up my freezer and searched through the drawers frantically for the ice.
Just as I gave up and grabbed a pack of peas, I heard a crashing noise from the living room, and Bix's babies flew out urgently, me following not far behind.
My jaw dropped open as I saw Natsu holding Bix upright from his shirt collar as he growled at him, a flaming fist held up.
Damn! I should have got Freed to leave up the runes! I cursed myself in my head, quickly making my way forward.
'What did you do to Lucy?' Natsu growled out at the defenceless man who was obviously still in pain from my embarrassing attempt to get off his lap.
'NATSU! LET HIM GO NOW!' I screamed, storming up to him angrily and grabbing a glass of stale water I'd left on my table this morning when I came back from Ever's place to change, before pouring it over his flaming fist.
'You use your magic in here again I'm going to tell Erza.' I threatened, glaring at him as he dropped Bix back on the floor, his hands held up innocently.
'Okay Luce, sorry. I was worried, and I'm hungry! Oh, I got us a job, can we go? Can we?' I sighed, handing Bix the bag of peas and pointing over to the bathroom. He grunted and limped across to my bathroom. As he shut the door, I sighed and collapsed on the sofa, closing my eyes and massaging my forehead as I felt the onsets of a headache.
I heard sniffing, and opened my eyes to see Natsu leaning in close to me, and sniffing away like a drugs sniffer dog.
'Hey, why do you smell of Bickslow so much? Did you hug him? Luuuce, you're only supposed to hug meeeee!' He whined, pulling on my arms like a kid.
'Natsu, please. I've got a headache.' I said, shaking him off grumpily. He backed off, and I heard him walk behind the sofa to stand behind me. I was about to ask what he was doing, when I felt his warm fingers rub soothing circles on my temples. I sighed in gratitude and shut my eyes, leaning back as I felt my headache fading away.
'Can we go on a job now?' He asked, not able to keep silent for more than a few seconds.
'I can't Natsu, I have training set up with Bix and Laxus for the next week or two. Besides, you've got Lisanna to go on jobs with you. I thought you got along with her fine while I was away.' I told him, turning around to face him and making his soothing fingers leave my skin.
'But Luuuce! You're my partner! Lisanna was helping us look for you, she won't mind!' I sighed, before glaring up at Natsu.
'She will mind Natsu. You'll upset her if you just drop her for me! I've been away for months, so you can't just ignore the team you built with her while I was gone.' I told him as Happy floated into my lap munching on a fish he'd stolen from my fridge. I smiled at him and stroked his head softly.
'But- but... Luuuucyyyyy!' He whined, kneeling down at my feet and whining like a baby.
'I can train you on the job, I'm much more fun than them! Besides, Lisanna will understand, you're my partner and part of team Natsu! I can't give you up that easily. Besides, Erza and Gray will miss you.' He pouted up at me but I sighed heavily.
'Natsu, can we talk about this later? I need to see if Bix is alright, and you need to go, because I have no food. Happy's just eaten the last of it.' Natsu glared at his friend as Happy quickly swallowed the last of the fish.
'Fine. Lucy, don't leave us.' He mumbled as he jumped out the window, Happy following behind him and waving sadly.
Great, now what do I do? I'd pretty much decided I'd leave Team Natsu, I mean, they'd been without me and with Lisanna for months considering I'd been at the spirit world for over a day, so the entire team dynamic would have changed around Lisanna.
I didn't mind, I knew Lisanna had a major crush on Natsu. Admittedly, I'd miss them a lot, but I felt like I would get over it; it's not like I'd stop being friends with them or anything, I'd just be working with the Raijinshuu... if they still wanted me.
Bix might not be so keen now I just kneed his crown jewels pretty damn hard.
I winced as I remembered his face contorted in male pain, and couldn't help but giggle as I remembered the slightly high pitched groan of pain he'd let out.
Bickslow's POV
Fuuuuuuuck! I thought as I placed the bag of peas on the painful area, wincing again and groaning.
Damnit cosplayer. I wouldn't have let you sit on my lap if I knew that would happen. I grumbled in my head, but I knew it was a lie. Feeling her in my arms, just felt... right. It was nice to have someone who I could hug.
It had been years since I'd just had a hug, no strings attached or no consequences to it, well other than getting nutted apparently.
That's a first.
I grimaced as I pulled the slightly warmed up bag of peas away from my boxers, and dropped them in the bin. Had the feeling she wouldn't want to use them after where they'd been.
I limped out of the bathroom, still feeling a sharp stab of pain from the one area every guy does not want pain to be in.
'Bix, are you ok? I'm really sorry, I panicked and then I accidently... jeez I'm sorry. Oh God I hope this won't affect your ability to have children or anything!' I stared at her open mouthed as she blabbered on and on about my balls. Any other time, I'd probably appreciate it, but not right now.
'Lucy! Calm down. I'm fine.' She stopped talking, and blushed bright red, avoiding looking in my eyes.
'Okay. Sorry.' She whispered, fiddling with her hands nervously as I slowly sat down in a chair and sighed in relief after spreading my legs.
'I'm good cosplayer. By the way, thanks for listening earlier.' I muttered, looking at the wall silently.
'Bix, thanks for telling me that. It must have been hard to remember all of that, and I appreciate that you decided to come to me for help.' I laughed lightly, smiling at her.
'Well you didn't give me much of a choice cosplayer.' She flushed an even darker red as I winked at her, before she wandered over to make her bed. I frowned.
'Hey, I thought you slept at Ever's last night?' She sighed, wiping down the pillows.
'I did. Natsu probably broke in last night and slept here. He does that a lot.' I scowled at the bed, picturing him in it, and then picturing me punching that flame bastard so hard he swallows his own fire.
'Want me to get Freed to write some runes around it?' I asked, testing out how much I could move now by shuffling slightly, and wincing.
'No, I mean, they've all missed me and I don't want to cut myself off from them just after getting back. I may have to go on a job with them just to let them know I'm not going to disappear again anytime soon.' She turned to face me and smiled.
'I have kind of neglected the team since coming back. I mean, during the party we didn't really get to have a good talk, and now I'm training with you and Laxus for most of the day. I don't want to lose my other friends because I found some new ones, you understand?' She asked, sitting herself down in the sofa and curling up into a ball, fiddling with her hair.
I nodded and grinned at her.
'Fine with me cosplayer. You are their team mate still, but know that the Raijinshuu still want you.' She looked up at me with wide surprised eyes.
'Even after I hurt your...' She trailed off and glanced down at my crotch. I smirked and laughed, my babies joining in the laughter.
'Yeah cosplayer, even after that. I can get over a little knee to my man pride, considering it was from such a pretty girl.' I winked, and saw her flush dark red before turning away stammering.
Hmm... interesting...
'W-w-well, umm, are you okay to walk? Laxus must be at the guild by now, getting all pissy because I'm not there for training!' She laughed nervously, and jumped up to grab some fresh clothes from her chest of drawers. I eyed up her panty drawer discreetly, but quickly shoved that thought out of my mind.
Come on Bix, if you want a girl like her, you gotta get your mind out the gutter! I smiled as she turned to grin at me.
'I'll be right out.' She said breathlessly, before running into the bathroom and locking the door behind her.
I stared at the door for a moment, before I slowly shifted painfully.
Damn. Cosplayer sure can knee pretty damn hard... guess I'll be helping her improve that next session... I spent the next few minutes imagining all the defence moves I could teach her that incorporated her knee, before she hopped out of the bathroom wearing a sleeveless dark purple t-shirt and short denim shorts, paired up with some converse shoes.
Oh Mavis help me. Those legs...
'Come on Bix, let's go. D'you um, need some help with the pain?' I smirked, wondering what she meant.
'Sure thing cosplayer.' I muttered, grinning as I winked, thinking she was kidding.
'Okay then!' I saw her brush her hand over one of her keys, and groaned as I realised what she meant, when she called out that damn spirits name.
"Phoenicis!"