"Tara, are you here?" There was a time when Tara would've run the other voice after hearing her voice. But it was different now, things were different and Buffy was the person who scared her the least. "In here." Fallowing the voice, Buffy knew would only lead her to more heart ache.
"Was Faith here?" Tara nodded as she crunched away on her cereal. "Why did she leave?" Maybe it was a stupid question, but it was exactly how Buffy felt at the time, stupid. "You know why." Tara got up and placed the bowl in the sink. "Is Willow around?"
Tara and Willow had made a mutual decision to call it quits. The magic which Willow possessed had become too strong and the events that had fallowed because of it, had been drastic and none pleasant. And therefore a breakup was more than necessary.
"I haven't seen her." Buffy thought strongly about going to sleep, even though it was a tad bit too early, she might've gotten away with it. When she closed her eyes, she would enter a whole new world, so different from her own, behind closed doors anything's possible.
"You know, Buffy, just because she has stopped crying, it does not mean that it doesn't hurt."
Buffy would cut herself off emotionally. But when you've had a rough life, like Faith, you learn how to survive on your own, you don't need to cut yourself off, for in the end we're all cut off. And sometimes we don't have to justify our actions either, because there might not be an explanation as to why we do what we do. Just like obsessions. You can't explain an obsession, they just are.
To Buffy, 'faith' had meant so much, it was what you call it when you don't know the name of the person screwing you over. But it wasn't just the name itself, but Faith as a person even more so. To her, Faith stood for what had been and what was to come. It stood for reckless behaviour and it stood for scars, cuts and bruises. It stood for the nights spent with the people you love the most and the memory loss the fallowing mornings. She felt honored and thankful for having grown up with Faith being such a huge part of her life.
Watching her let go of it all and realizing that there's a time and a place for everything, made her feel more comfortable in her own skin, somwhat comfortable anyway.
She did believe that there was a big plan for everyone, but maybe not in this lifetime.
"We never got to experience it and who knows, maybe I would've been something she'd be good at."
To Tara it seemed like Buffy was on her knees, asking for one last chance, like it was even up to her. She'd do just about anything, but she wouldn't give up. "You do realize that it's too late for this, right? And also, why are you talking to me about it, do you think I care, because I don't. God I don't care."
Once again, Buffy had been shot down with arrows from waves above.
You won't see it coming when it happens, but when it happens you're going to feel it, when love comes and knocks you down. "And now your time is up and it's my turn, to see if I'm something she'll be good at."