Chapter 3
I had decided that when I see JJ, I am going to ask him out. I walked out of the class when the bell rang and went straight to the lunch hall, to try and look for him.I scanned through the whols room looking for him but I couldn't see him only his friend's. He must have went out of the school for lunch, but I couldn't go out of the school grounds because my mom thought it was dangerous. I don't know how it can be dangerous, but that's what my mom thinks.
I had to wait for half an hour until he came back into the grounds, when I seen him walking into the grounds my heart was in my shoes. I just watched him with loving eyes and then he seen me and smiled his beautiful smile, and walked over to me. "Hey Alex," he said looking intensely into my eyes.
I couldn't speek it was if I had lost my tounge."H..H...Hiya JJ, I have something t...to ask you," I CAN'T DO IT I kept telling myself I CAN'T DO IT, I CAN'T DO IT, I CAN'T DO IT!!!
"Okay," he said camly and cooly."Shoot." And then he shone that beautiful smile that made me fall in love with him.
I took a few deep breaths then looked at him in the eyes, those beautiful emerald eyes. "I w...was wondering if you w...would like to go some t...t...time?" When I had finished talking to him I had to away because I was going bright red.
JJ didn't talk for a while, I guessed he was thinking about it. More like how polietly to say no. "Alex," he started."It's a lovely thought bu-"
"Why?" I interupted, I wanted know why he was saying no.
"It's Complicated" Was all he said.
"Nothing can be that complicated that you can't go out with someone, I didn't even say when or where. Do you have a girlfriend? Is that it? It's not that complicated you know. You could of just said. I wouldn't have been offended."
"Alex, let me finish this time okay? I don't have a girlfriend by the way. It was a lovely thought Alex and I would love to go out with you but," he took a long pause at that moment, held my hands and looked lovingly into my eyes and said the two words I will hate forever " I can't, I'm really sorry." Then he just walked away out of the school.
I was heart broken. I was crushed. I just wanted the ground to swollow me up and never spit me out. But mainly I was so embarassed cause I really thought he was going to say yes. I'm so stupid, how could I ever think someone like him, could ever like someone like me. I'm to normal and plain and he's wonderful, funny, smart, charming and everything a girl could ever want. He must have loads of girls wanting him, how could I ever think that out of all those glamourous girls he must have wanting him that he would ever want ME.
I felt the tears running down my cheeks, I just wanted to DIE. Then I saw Steph running towards me with that sorry look she has, she must have found out what happened. I felt a whole lot worse, cause if Steph knows then EVERYONE knows. I remember once in 3 grade, I told Steph that I fancied this boy called Callum,and within a minute mabye everyone knew and then Callum came up to me and said, "I would NEVER go out with you!" It was a heartbreaking moment but now looking back on it, it was really funny.
"How could he say no Al? HOW?"Steph inturupted my memories.
"I dunno Steph, but does everyone one know?"I had to ask, she wouldn't find it insulting, she knew that no-one could trust her with any secrets.
"No, they don't only me. JJ went into the dining hall and pulled me away from our table and gave me this note, I HAD to read it sorry, here" She said handing me the note. I unfolded it and read;
Heyy Alex I'm sorry I said no, I do love you. I love you so much but it's better this way.
I'm not going to be in any of your classes anymore, I will be at school but not so that you would see me.
Don't take it as a offence, I just can't. It's to dangerous for us to get close. I really love you so much.
Love you more than my life,
JJ
There was tear marks on the page, and I had realised that I was crying my eyes out. I couldn't go back into the school, because everyone would ask me what was going on and I wouldn't be able to take it."I'm going home Steph. I'll call you later." And then i just walked away...