Again my mused changed her mind a bit. I had originally planned this to be a multiple POV chapter. But Kacey's part ended up way to long and thus got its own chapter. I know you're just so broken hearted by that. Hehe.

Also, there's a scene of Kacey alone with Optimus. From the Movie Score, the track Optimus was running through my head while I wrote it. The music seemed fitting for that scene even as I went back to read.

One more note, this was a difficult chapter, hence the reason it took so long. I've been going through a family crisis with a family member being in and out of the hospital the past couple of months. So, I'm in much need of updates and reviews! Yes, reviews make for a happy muse. Such things distract my mind from my worries.

Thanks for being patient. Now on with chapter 43.

Author's notes: italics denote Kacey's flashback/dream. Tissues will be needed.

Kacey

I felt so drained of energy fending off Megatron like that. I could barely keep my head up as Prowl carried me quickly through the halls. But I would do it again if I had to even though I wasn't entirely sure what I did. All I knew was that father was in trouble and I had to help. I felt his anguish and just…reacted.

Thank Primus uncle didn't try to assault father's spark like that again. I don't have the strength right now to protect my father.

Father.

I started crying again. I felt him dying. I could barely feel him right now. When I reached out to him…he didn't reach back. Frightened, I tried harder to reach to him, much like I did when mother had been a prisoner aboard Megatron's ship.

What little energy I had left was fading fast from my efforts. I could feel my automatic recharge program attempting to shut down my systems. I fought against it. I had to! I couldn't leave father all alone.

"Red!" Prowl shouted as he rushed into the med bay.

"Lay her here!"

My optic covers blinked a few times as I tried to keep my optics online. During one blink I had gone from seeing the ceiling move to suddenly lying on the table both Red Alert and Prowl's concerned faces above me.

"Is it spark trauma?"

"Mostly, odd…her systems are reacting to something similar to an overloaded," Red replied.

"But that can't be. Her interface systems are offline."

"I said it was similar. Her recharge systems are taking over, she'll recharge for a short while to regain the energy lost."

"I don't want to," I said, struggling to sit up.

"You don't have a choice, youngling," Red said, holding my shoulders down.

"No, I have to protect father," I wept. "He needs me!"

"Optimus is in capable hands," Prowl gently said. "Recharge. Trust that Ratchet will take care of him as I do."

I couldn't reply. I lost the struggle against my recharge program.

"Recharge, Kacey. You'll feel better once you wake," mother insisted.

I curled up clutching my abdomen, my tanks churned angrily within again. This by far was one of the worst system upsets I've ever had.

"Do you want me to get Ratchet for the pain?"

Before I could even answer my tank purged. Mother was able to at least get out of the way before the thick brown substance splattered all over my bed and floor. I wept uncontrollably, reaching out to father through our bond. I was desperate for his love. Only he could make the pain bearable.

"Where's father?" I asked, whimpering, when he didn't reach back like he normally did.

"He and Magnus left a while ago to check on some reported Decepticon activity near the southern pole region," she answered, wiping my face. "Come on, let's move you away from this mess. Ratchet is already on his way. I'm sure he'll give you something for the pain."

I cried out when mother lifted me. I couldn't help it. The pain was too much. Mother was scared, I could feel it. I could see it in her face as she cradled me close.

"Shh, don't cry," she cooed, rocking me gently while pacing back and forth..

"I want my father," I wept.

"He'll be back as soon as he can, I promise."

"So what seems to be the problem?" Ratchet asked as he entered my room. "Ah, I see…system upset."

"I'm not sure…she's never had a system upset like this before."

On queue I howled in pain and tried to curl up.

"Turn her, her tank is about to purge again," Ratchet quickly said. And purge it did, all over the floor. I sobbed and choked when I was done calling for father again. "There, there. It is just a system upset."

"Is it bad because…of the surgery?" mother asked quietly but I still heard. "It's only been a month."

"I'm not sure," Ratchet answered my mother, his hands gently taking hold of my arm. "Galen, has some of the worse I've ever seen. Worse than this."

"OW! FRAGGER!" I screeched at him when he injected something into my forearm port.

"Nothing wrong with your vocal processor," he chuckled.

I hissed at him loudly.

"Kacey!"

"It's ok, Elita. I've experienced far worse. You're welcome, Kacey," he smiled at me. "That should help with the pain but she'll still have some discomfort. Keep her wrapped in a blanket for now and try to keep her as comfortable as possible. I'll be back to check on her in an hour. I'll also get a medical clean up crew in here."

"Thank you. I'm sure if Kacey was feeling more herself she'd be more…polite."

I instantly felt bad for my behavior and apologized. This of course, got me crying again.

'Kacey?' my father suddenly questioned over our bond as I felt his loving warmth spread from within my core.

'Father!'

'Shh, don't cry my child. I'll be there soon.'

"My darling Kacey don't cry. Optimus will be here very soon now," mother said, pressing her lips softly against my forehead. "But then, you already know that, don't you?"

I nodded my head, continually feeling the love and affection of both my parents. Most times it would help me feel better. Just not today. Today, I really wanted my father. Nothing compared to having father hold me close against his chest. I even fought off recharge to remain awake with the hope of seeing him when he arrived.

"You're so stubborn just like your father," mother smiled.

I grinned weakly but very proud of her comment. Mother merely laughed at me.

"Try to rest. You know Optimus will worry if you're not resting properly."

Again, I nodded my head and tried my best to listen to my mother. My tank kept rumbling making it difficult to even get comfortable. Exhaustion finally won out and I fell into recharge.

Hushed voices roused me some time later. In my groggy state I knew I was with my father. I could feel the strength of his spark pulsing close to my own. I could feel his chest vibrating slightly from his deep voice as he talked.

I opened my optics long enough to look around and see Magnus and Prowl were there in our quarters. Presumable a meeting of some kind with my father. Then I looked up to see those glowing blue optics staring affectionately at me.

"Sorry if we woke you," he smiled. "Go on, my child. Recharge, I'm here now."

I yawned then nuzzled my face against his strong chest. I could feel him adjusting the blanket over my shoulder. My father's strong presence within was so comforting and calming. Content, I fell back into recharge.

When I woke my energy levels had returned to normal. The dream of my memory was ever present in my processor. However, my spark ache remained. I could barely feel my father through our spark bond. His strong, loving presence felt but a whisper within.

I didn't like it.

It frightened me that I couldn't feel him like I normally did.

I was ffraid I may never see the affection he had from me as he looked upon me. Afraid I'd never feel his powerful, loving embrace around me. Afraid I may never hear his deep melodic voice as he hummed or sang to calm me whenever I was upset. Afraid I might not ever feel his presence within me again.

'Pull your head out of your aft, Kacey. Be positive,' I chided myself.

No one noticed when I sat up. Everyone appeared as I felt, consumed by their own grief. It was kind of hard to be positive when everyone looked so grim.

Chromia was holding Ironhide close. I had never seen the big mech so distraught before. Magnus appeared equally upset, holding Akima in his strong arms, one of her hands gently caressing his chest. Prowl too, arms crossed across his chest as he stood, leaning against the wall, optics staring blankly, concern etched into his faceplates. I did not see mother. I assume she's behind the closed door they were all kept glancing at.

Then I noticed Bumblebee and the twins were there too in a different corner of the med bay. Each of them was holding my brothers and sister. Leo was clinging to Bumblebee, whimpering softly. Ariel was crying too. Sides was trying to comfort her by holding her close to his spark, patting her back gently. Sunny was doing the same thing with Orion.

My spark sank. I instantly felt sick to my tank for in my concern for father I had forgotten my brothers and sister. My selfishness kept me from being where I was needed most.

Giving my self a mental slap across the faceplates I quickly got to my feet and straightened up. My siblings needed me to be strong and so I must no matter how much my spark was aching right now.

"Thank you, guys," I spoke softly after I walked over to them. "I'll take them now."

"It's ok, Kacey," Bumblebee smiled. "We'll take care of them."

"Your help is much appreciated but as the eldest the responsibility is mine."

I extended my arms out for Leo. I was not going to take no for an answer.

"Perhaps, later I'll need a break or when Ratchet comes out to tell us the news. But for now, please Bee, give me my little brother. He needs me. They all do."

My friend nodded then gently set Leo in my arms. I managed to get Orion and Ariel in my arms too and took them to a private corner of the Med Bay, setting them on the medical birth there. Their teary optics and sad faces looked up at me.

For a moment, all I could see was father. Ariel, though she looked more like mother, had the same look in her face as father whenever he was worried. Same with Orion. Leo…Leo was just a small version of father with his looks. He didn't look like mother at all, except when he smiled. He did have mother's smile.

Quickly choking back my tears, I pulled them into an embrace. I just simply held them as close as I possibly could without crushing them while giving them all the love and reassurance they needed through our spark bond. It was extremely difficult as they sobbed and trembled in my arms, their small arms clinging to me. Their grief intermingled so closely with my own. Thankfully I was experienced enough to not let them feel my grief.

"I'm so sorry," I whispered to them, kissing each one in turn on top of the head. "I should have been there for you."

"Is Ratchet going to fix, daddy?" Leo asked his teary optics so full of fear.

"He's doing his best to repair father," I replied confidently.

"Promise me he'll fix daddy," Leo wept, rubbing his chest. "My spark hurts, I can't feel him."

"I cannot make that promise, Leo. Some things are left for Primus to decide. But I can promise that Ratchet will do his best for our father. It is up to you to have faith in Primus."

"What about you, Kacey?" Orion asked. I blinked at him. "I've always known that the spark bond between you and father is much stronger than any of ours. Will you do your best to not let father die?"

"I will do whatever I can to help father get well."

"Promise?" Leo asked staring directly at me.

"I promise to do my best."

A door opened. I turned to see Ratchet and Wheeljack emerge from the private room. Bumblebee grabbed Sunny and Sides and immediately came over to me. My favorite uncle, my dear friend always seemed to know what I needed or when. How fitting that Bee would be here when I needed him most.

"Thank you," I smiled to him and the twins. Then I turned to my brothers and sister. "I'll be back as soon as I can."

"I want mother," Ariel sniffled.

"Ok, mom is always best," I smiled, caressing her face. "I love you…all of you so much."

Tears fell harder. Their grief was so constricting now that I could barely hold my tears back. I quickly kissed each of them on the forehead before making my way over to the others. I had to hear what Ratchet had to say.

"Kacey, you…"

"My place is here, Ratchet," I said seriously. "I'm not a young bot like the others. I'm mature enough to handle this. And to be blunt, you'll have to have Prowl lock me in the brig to keep me away." I paused, holding my ground. "I need to hear what you have to say."

"Very well," he frowned. "As I was saying, I've never seen a virus quite like this before. It's attacking all of his systems one by one, shutting them down. But I can tell you it's definitely not Cybertronian in origin."

"Then what is it?" Prowl asked.

"Best I can tell, its Quintesson technology," Wheeljack answered.

"The Quintessons…they hate our kind, why the frag would they be working with the Decepticons?" Ironhide growled.

"They're xenophobes, they don't hate us," I corrected.

"They could be forced labor," Magnus chimed in. "The Decepticons did take over their base on Mechanar."

"Logic would dictate that they took the Quintessons hostage," Prowl added. "It's so like a Decepticon to take what they can and dispose of it when it's no longer useful."

"That could explain how Megatron was brought back," Wheeljack mused. "They're technology is far superior to our own. I've heard a rumor that they can bring a mechanism back from termination."

"None of that matters now. What's being done about my father?" I demanded.

Ratchet let out a long sigh, his optics filled with sympathy. I trembled within. I knew the news wasn't good. I took a deep breath in and let it out slowly.

"Please…tell me, Ratchet."

"Optimus is dying," he spoke softly. "Stasis has slowed the virus down to a crawl and hasn't reached his processor or more vital systems yet. But it is still advancing and slowly killing him."

"But you and Jack are working on a cure, yes?"

"We're doing everything we can, Kacey," Wheeljack smiled warmly.

I looked from Wheeljack to Ratchet, stared each one directly in the optics. Each one in turn held my gaze momentarily before turning away.

They didn't know how to help my father.

I could see it...I could feel it. But I said nothing. I knew both Jack and Ratchet would do what they could for my father. Hopefully it would be enough to save him.

"Can I see him…please?" I asked, my voice wavered momentarily, my optic covers blinked back my tears.

Ratchet didn't answer as he stared down at me.

"It's alright, Ratchet. We won't be able to stop her from being with Optimus," mother's voice spoke from behind. "And I would not deny what is her right."

"Of course, Elita," he replied, bowing his head slightly as he stepped aside.

Right away I noticed that mother had been crying. She always had a look on her face just after she was crying. I remember it quite well for I often heard her crying when I was very small, when we were on Cybertron and away from father. She did her best to never let me see her tears. But I always knew there were there. I could feel how much she missed father when I was growing up on Cybertron.

But my mother was one for always being so strong. She did was she had to back then. And she was doing her best to hold it together for us right now. It was a burden I felt she didn't have to bear alone.

So, I said nothing of what I observed. Instead I wrapped my arms around her, sending her my love through our bond. It was my way of letting her know she wasn't alone, that we could be strong together. My love and strength was eagerly accepted and returned.

"Go on. Be with him for a while. Be strong…for him."

"I understand," I told her.

Without hesitation I went into the private room and then stopped. The door automatically closed behind me. Red was still there checking all the leads and attachments from the machines my father was hooked up to and didn't notice my presence.

My father's protoform did not look as I was accustomed to. Even without armor my father always had a presence of strength, power, and confidence. It radiated from him at all times. Now, he appeared so…weak. Even the metallic skin color was off. Optic covers were much darker than I've seen when he'd been recharging. Unwanted medical probes were plugged into his forearm, his left audio receptor, and one over his chest.

"Kacey…oh…I'll leave you alone," Red said.

"Do you have a thermal blanket?" I asked, not knowing why. It was just something to distract my processor for a brief moment giving me a chance to recover from the initial shock of seeing my father in this…condition.

Red nodded, retrieving a blanket from a supply cabinet across the room.

"Don't be afraid to talk to him," he smiled, handing me the blanket.

With that he left me alone with my father. For the longest of moments I just stood there, watching, waiting, half expecting my father to just sit up as if nothing was wrong. Only he didn't. The room was quiet except for the medical machines my father was linked to.

They all had technical names. For the life of me I couldn't recall a single one of them at the moment.

I sighed and slowly moved to my father's side. Ever so gently I unfolded the blanket and started to cover him up. First his long thick legs. Then his chest, being very careful as I lifted each arm one at a time and lay them over the blanket.

"I wonder…did you do this often whenever I was in the med bay?" I asked him, flattening out the blanket across his broad chest. "I'm sure you did. I often woke covered so neatly and snuggly. Mother's never that neat with the blankets unless she was covering Ariel. Leo, Orion, and myself don't really give a frag how we're covered."

Father said nothing in response. Nor did I expect him to.

On impulse I reached and took hold of his large hand. Primus, I never noticed just how huge it was compared to mine. It could easily encompass both my hands. Yet, for their large size and abundant strength father had a delicate touch. I've felt if often through his affections.

How I wish I could feel them right now.

"I suppose I should talk to you, yes? You've talked to me. I recall hearing your voice during those times when I drift between recharge and consciousness. Only, I never knew what you were saying. I was never coherent enough to understand you. But then again, I never needed to understand. Just the sound of your voice was comfort enough."

"So…what should I talk to you about?" I mused, pulling a chair closer, while never letting go of his hand with one of mine. I sat down and a thought came to my processor. "I um, I was doing some research last night. I think I've narrowed down what my inscribes will be. I just need your opinion on them. And…do you know who would etch them into my skin?"

"I heard this crazy rumor that Sunny had a good hand for inscribes. Yeah, I know. I can't believe it either. It has to be a rumor. I can't believe Sunny could be that artistic. Imaginative. But not artistic."

"Oh, and speaking of Sunny. Leo needs to stop hanging out with him and Sides. Or you need to have a talk to you son. A long talk…pfft, with both of them. I found both Leo and Orion in their room comparing interface appliance size."

"Apparently, Leo asked Sunny about the size of his interface appliance, you know if a femme would even be attracted to him because he was a small mech. Leo wouldn't tell me what Sunny said so I had to ask the screwball myself. I had to twist his arm a bit, but Sunny finally told me that for Leo's small frame his interface appliance was well endowed…something I didn't need to hear. This of course is what prompted Leo and Orion to compare the interfaces."

I laughed.

"They had no shame and bluntly asked me what I thought. I of course averted my optics and ordered them to put them away or cover up. You should have seen the looks on their faces. They had no clue! I told them its one thing to be compare the private parts with each other but never ask you sister and the only femme who should lay optics on their interface appliances is the one the about to interface with. I'm serious. They both know exactly what interfacing is. You and mom need to do some damage control before Sunny corrupts them even further."

I sighed.

"I don't think you have to worry too much about Galen and Ariel. Galen is very polite and well mannered. He'll treat Ariel the way she's meant to be. Besides, you'll never break them up. Galen has that look in his optics. That same one you have when you look at mom. You know the one you have when you think no one is watching you. I didn't meant to watch…it just…I notice every thing…I'm sorry. Habit. Trion taught me to be very observant."

I frowned, glancing at the door, wondering for a moment how mom was doing. I could feel her sadness through our bond even though she was trying to keep it from me.

"You have to pull through, father. Mom needs you. We all…do…"

My voice faltered and my tears fell as I wept. I couldn't stop them. It was like the flood gates just opened. Clinging to his hand I choked and sobbed uncontrollably.

"There's so much you have to teach me. I'm not strong like you. I can never be the leader you are. I'm not ready to be Prime! The Autobots need you! Father, you can't die. I need you! You have to get better!"

On impulse, I reached out to him through our spark bond.

'Father! Father…please!' I cried over and over. There was no response so I reached harder…further… 'FATHER!'

'Don't cry my child,' his voice whispered within.

He sounded so weak…so far away. I strained to give him what energy I could.

'Please, Kacey…don't. It is enough for me to feel you near me. You have such a strong spark, my child.'

'I would do whatever I could to help you, father.'

'I know. I know. But I cannot allow you to hurt yourself in the process.'

'I will not leave you alone…I cannot.'

Father's presence started to fade from me. With a surge of love I reached out and tried to pull him back.

'I will always love you…my beautiful star.'

'Father no!!!! Don't leave me…father…I love you! Father! Don't go!'

Beeping.

My audio receptors picked up loud beeping as my processor retreated from the muddled haze. My optics quickly came into focus and I discovered I was lying on the floor with mother's concerned face above me.

And then, the beeping stopped. I groggily got to my feet. Mother helped and sat me back on the chair beside my father.

"He's stable again," Ratchet announced with a relieved sigh. He turned to me, looking a bit annoyed. "What did you do?"

"Nothing, I just reached out to him."

"Well don't do that again," he snapped at me. "Optimus, even in this condition, would do what he could to stop you from hurting yourself. Understand?"

I meekly looked up at him and my mother.

"Yes," I nodded, my optics down cast onto the floor.

"Perhaps you should go recharge," mother suggested, wrapping a comforting arm around my shoulders. "It's very late."

Surprised, I checked my internal chronometer. It was indeed late evening. How long had I been trying to reach father?

"I can't leave him," I spoke softly, tears rolling down my face. I looked up at my mother, imploring her to let me stay. My tears fell faster. I could not stop them. "I will not leave him. He would never leave me if I were here."

"Just promise me you'll never pull a trick like that again," she said, barely able to hold back her tears. "You were unresponsive to us. Ratchet feared hurting you if we forced you to stop what you were doing." Mother pulling me into an embrace, holding me tight. I could feel her tears on top of my head. "I can't risk losing both of you."

"I'm sorry," I wept, clinging to her. "I'm so sorry. I just want him to be ok."

"We all do, Kacey," she said, tears slowly rolling down her cheeks as she looked at me. "We all do."

Up next: More of the past from Ironhide, Ratchet and Elita's POV