Title: Can't Turn Back

By: Myra

Status: Incomplete [6/?]

Summary: Please don't get me wrong / Because I'll never let this go / But I can't find the words to tell you / I don't want to be alone / But now I feel like I don't know you oh ~ Paramore – Let this Go

Disclaimer: I own this laptop… And this plot. And some OCs... But I swear that's it! Also changing the set up to my stories.

Thank You's (additional thank you's at the bottom): Anyone and everyone from CBthePP (both administers and readers: they know that their awesome).

WARNINGS: Abortion and depression, heavy implication of Dangina, Serena bashing (sort of), Georgie defending Blair, Dan/Chuck friendship, Nate/Chuck enemies, at least 4 OC (Melanie Coarsen-Bass, Casey Abbot, Arthur 'Ari' Rose, and Edward 'Eddie' Charles Waldorf), baby!Milo is Dan's son. I don't how much of season 3 and season 4 that I will use be warned. Actually, it's mostly AU.

Can't Turn Back:

Chapter 6: In My Defense

Georgina Sparks wanted to believe that she had changed over the last decade or so. She wasn't the evil bitch from the Upper Eastside anymore, nor was she the master of manipulations. The birth of her son, Milo, might have had something to do with that and years of pursuit of a certain Humphrey didn't hurt either. Yes, years had changed her—for the most part.

It still didn't mean she didn't like to see people squirm, especially if that someone was a Chuck Bass—who looked absolutely flabbergasted when she asked him a simple question involving a certain Waldorf and her maternal nature. She quickly noticed his discomforted and pressed on the subject.

"Really, Chuck," she said lightly, "How can you possibly know that? Did Snow White finally settle down and had her own set of little dwarves?"

Chuck frown at the statement and Georgia's smirk grew into a bright wide smile. She processed with questioning him. "So Waldorf, pop out a few kids, Bass? Are any of them yours?"

Yet, the Bass heir stayed silent. Georgia's patience was running thin, but she was not willing to pass up this piece of gossip.

"Eventually the whole Upper Eastside will find out about Blair's and her maternal leave, Chuck. And I'll let you in on a little secret they won't be as kind as I," she said cautiously.

Chuck scoff. "How Humphrey manages to put up with you, I'll never know," he said half-serious, "What is it to you if Blair's had a child or not?"

"Curiosity," she said simply before adding, "What made the Queen of the Upper Eastside run? And by the look on your face, I'd have to say a mysterious lovechild."

"You know nothing," he snaps.

"You're right Bass," Georgie said thoughtfully and Chuck cocked his eyebrow, "So why don't you enlighten me. Why did she leave you?"

Chuck considered telling Georgie on the reasoning behind Blair's disappearance, after all Georgie had proven to be a very powerful ally during the last few years. She wouldn't use this information against him, she was just genuinely curious about Blair.

Chuck had his mind made up he was going to tell Georgie and hopefully it would not bit him in the ass. But as he proceeded to tell her, someone interrupted their conversation.

"Georgina, would you mind leaving me alone with my husband." Georgina turned around and faced the very angry, Mrs. Melanie Coarsen-Bass. Georgie smile and turned to face Chuck again.

"Oh I'm not going anywhere," Georgie said brightly. Melanie grabbed Georgina by her upper arm and dragged her off her sit. Melanie spun Georgie until she was facing her.

"That wasn't a request," the 2nd petite brunette hissed.

Georgie shook her off. "I'd be careful if I were you," She threatened Melanie, "from what I hear you're not pregnant. This means…"

"Sparks, your threats are meaningless as last season Prada," Melanie smirk triumphantly. Georgie frown at this and glanced over at Chuck who was quietly eating his breakfast. He looked unperturbed by the spat that was currently going on in front of him.

Georgina smirked and added, "Doesn't it just kill you that you'll never hold his attention like Blair Waldorf did?"

Blair blamed Ari's observant nature on one dearly deceased Aaron Rose.

Arthur Rose noticed her sadness and questioned her every move without even opening his mouth. There was sadness in his eyes, mostly due to the fact that he couldn't understand what made his mother so unhappy. Clearly this island brought her grief. So the most reasonable answer to their problems was to depart from this island immediately and go home—to go back to the world from where they came from.

"Mum?" he asked timidly as they walked through Central Park. She mumbles a 'yes' he proceeds to ask, "Why did we come here?"

"Central Park?" she questions right back, "I thought you might enjoy it. I know I did when I was younger…"

He shook his head, "No, that's not what I asked."

Blair frowned; she looked over at her at her 10-year-old son and noticed that he stopped a few steps behind her. She turns around and faces him. What was Blair Waldorf doing on the Upper Eastside?

XOXO

Blair walked down the corridors that lead her into her private study. She heard someone shriek. She quickens her pace and opens the doors widely; in her study's, stood a Mr. Nate Archibald and a Miss Casey Abbot.

Casey was livid.

"Nate? Casey? Would you mind cluing me in?"Blair snapped, "Or please inform me why I had to step away from my son's room. And please don't tell me so that I could hear you two arguing."

"Nate and I are having a disagreement," Casey answered.

Blair rolled her eyes. "Really? A disagreement? I would never have guess," Blair added sarcastically, "And couldn't you have done this…say in the comforts of your own home?"

"Try explaining that to her," Nate bit back.

Casey cleared her throat and answered, "We're here to discuss the 'Chuck' situation." Nate crossed his hands over his chest and scoff.

"No, you're here to discuss it, leave me out of it."

"If you weren't going to be helpful then you should have stayed home or better yet stayed at the office, since apparently you live there," she added bitterly. Blair watched her friends with morbid fascination. In a few seconds, Nate would calm Casey down and all will be alright with Archibald/Abbot world.

"Case…," he's voice softened, "Listen, I just think that it's up to Blair decide."

"Hello, I'm right here," Blair said as she motioned to herself. They ignored her and continued to give weird eye signals. Finally, Casey back down and turned to her best friend. "I think you should tell Chuck," she said bluntly, "He has a right know. If you love Edward, then do this for him. So that one day he won't have to wonder who his father is."

Blair swallowed the lump in her throat and shook her head. "No," she said simply while wiping the tears from her eyes.

"Blair," Casey tried to reason with her, "Edward isn't just your son, he's Chuck's too. He's part of the love you two still share."

"Casey," Nate warned her, but she brushed off.

"Blair, please," she implored her, "Do this for your son. If nothing else think about Edward."

"Casey, he's married and expecting a child from his wife," Blair spat out angrily.

Casey scoffed. "Excuses, that's all I hear," Casey remarked, "Tell him Blair, besides you owe him that much. Explanation, the truth, you can't keep running from your problems. It's been seven years, time to face the music. Confront those demons that have been with you since the miscarriage for Eddie, for Chuck, for yourself."

XOXO

Blair shook her head. "I don't nearly give enough credit for being so perceptive," she smiled sadly. She takes one step forward and crouches down in front of him.

"I love you and Eddie so much, and I will do anything for the two of you," she began, "I had to do this for Eddie. I had to be strong and face my fears for your brother. I know there's a lot you might not understand and I'm asking you to trust me."

She stood up and held out her hand, almost immediately he reached up and held it. They continued most of the morning uninterrupted until the noon.

Serena walked past The Palace Hotel for the 9th billion time that morning hoping to catch Blair, but alas she was nowhere to be found. It wasn't that she wants to talk to the brunette per say; in fact she all she wanted information on a certain Archibald. She knew that she shouldn't been asking, but it had been years and no word, no call, and much like Blair he disappear. But unlike Blair, she knew the reason behind his departure. Chuck.

Chuck had basically exiled him from all of Manhattan after the "argument". Serena tried to defend Nate's honor, but after Chuck threaten to disown her as well, and she left well enough alone.

She had known exactly where Nate went wrong in his business venture. She had been partly responsible for the failed project. The remorse ate at her and all she wanted to do was apology for everything that she had done in the past.

She just hoped in time Nate would forgive her and possibly return to her. Despite everything she still loved him.

The air shifted in the small café as soon as Georgina uttered the name 'Blair Waldorf'. There was a wide smile on Georgie's face as she turned to face Melanie once again. The current Mrs. Bass looked startled beyond belief.

"What's the matter, Mel?" Georgina asked in a mocking tone, "Waldorf got your tongue?"

Melanie's eyes narrowed, but she said nothing. Georgie took this golden opportunity to continue to ridicule Melanie in regarded to a certain former-Queen B. This was really all too easy.

"All you will ever be is a place holder." Georgie continued.

"You don't even like Blair," Melanie hissed.

"She was a lot better than you," Georgie said plainly, "Besides; she was never as dull as you."

Georgie turned her back to her and noticed Chuck was no longer at the table. She groaned, now she would have to cancel all her afternoon plans with Dan and Milo and track the Bass-tard down. Melanie had the worst timing.

"Where did he go?" she heard Melanie ask.

Georgie scoff, "Hell if I know."

She proceeded to walk out of the café and felt Melanie trailing behind her. If this were any other time Georgina and Melanie would had another showdown, but Georgie was on a mission and that did not include arguing with Upper Eastside trash. She would have to lose her in the Manhattan crowd.

When Blair had revealed all her secrets to Chuck, he thought it would lift a weight off his shoulders. It had done the exact opposite. He had even more unanswered questions for the girl who broke his heart. Like did Edward have his eyes? What were his first words? Did he have her eyes?

But the biggest one he had was: Why? Why did she keep something so delicate from him? Why would he keep his son away from him?

Perhaps, he had left too sudden yesterday and all the questions that were now burning in his brain would have been answered—had he stayed put.

Georgina said two words: 'Blair Waldorf' and everything was put in perspective. He needed to talk to her. So while Georgina and Melanie argued about Blair, he quickly made his way out the café and past the two brunettes.

Once he was out the café, he made his way back to The Empire. He had to pick up a few things before he made his way over to see Blair.

Around noon Blair had shown up at that Palace with Ari right besides her. Their moods were certainly lifted and Ari was finally appreciating the joys that Manhattan had to offer. Ari noticed his mother tense when she saw the tall blond women from yesterday. He immediately dislikes her for causing his mother to cry.

"Blair," the women greeted coldly.

All his mother did was pursed her lips—like she did when he was in trouble. The site of this woman was unpleasant.

"I thought you wanted nothing to do with me after last night," his mother bit back.

"I don't," the women replied not a second later, "But I do need some information. On Nate."

Ari's frowned. How did this woman know his Uncle Nate? Did she know Auntie Casey?

So before he could stop himself, he asks her, "Do you Auntie Casey, too?"

Finally tearing his attention from his mum, the tall blonde women looked down at him and simply said, "No."

She glances back up at Blair and before she could continue Ari interrupted them again.

"Then how do you know my Uncle Nate?" he asked curiously.

"We're all old friends," she said snottily. Blair's cocked her eyebrow at Serena, and was somewhat surprised at the manner that she was speaking to Ari in.

"Uncle Nate never mentioned you," Ari said in a matter-of-fact tone. Blair smirked at her son's wit and waited for Serena comeback, "Actually Uncle Nate said the only good thing about New York was him leaving. Then he met my Auntie Casey and now they're getting married. They've set a date and everything."

Blair—tried as she might—held back a smile. The look on Serena face was priceless. She looked like she swallowed something sour.

"Oh," Serena said simply.

There was an awkward silence that followed. Blair looked over at a disheveled Serena. She almost felt sorry for her.

The last time she'd seen Serena—prior to last night—she had been so full of life, a new model ready to take on the world. Now, she was a renowned model who spent her time thinking of ways to destroy her. It was Blair's fault, she knew it.

Blair detached herself from her friends long before her departure, so many years ago. The only problem was no one had seen her unhappiness, no one would see her. As much as she loved Chuck—she still did—he was making something of himself. Even Georgina Sparks had a higher-calling, motherhood. With Humphrey no less. Everyone had somewhere to be, something to do, everyone but Blair.

Blair started to walk passed Serena and said softly, "For what it's worth, I would have loved to have seen you and Nate get married, but Casey makes him happy. Don't try to look for him, the damage is done."

"You should be following your own advice," she spat back venomously and Blair halted to a stop. She turned back and said:

"The difference between us is: Chuck and I have created someone together, someone who will be loved and cared for their entire lives. You and Nate have nothing. Your love didn't last because you didn't fight for him. And yes, I've made mistakes, mistakes that I am paying for but you know what? I'm slowly forgiving myself, I hope someday you'll get over your bitter resentfulness towards me and forgive me too."

Blair grabbed a hold of Ari's hand and led him inside the Palace doors, not really caring what Serena reaction would be.

Blair and Ari made their way to the suite in record time.

As soon as Blair enters the suite, she let out a sigh of relief and leaned against the door. She closed her eyes for only a moment.

"Mum?" Ari asked timidly.

"I'm fine, Ari," she assured him and gradually opens her eyes. Right there in the middle of the suite stood Chuck Bass.

"What I meant to ask was: what is he doing here?" Ari asked more boldly than before. Blair wondered the same thing.

TBC...

A/N: I know I'm horrible at updating this story. I tried and no excuses but my muses hates me from time to time and well I was pretty much out of it of July and part of August (health reasons). And shouldn't even be asking for people to review (please do though) let alone ask questions but here you go: Should Vanessa be included in this story? (Poll on my Profile :))

Btw thank you for the feedback on Serena/Nate/Casey. I already have it set up so the story will end with who Nate deserves to end up with. I actually have the Serena/Casey/Nate parts written up… on my phone :) You can't make these things up.

Thank you time:

itsolgatime: Well not too much on the Chair front but it's something, but thanks for reviewing :)

Heyeyeyeyeyy: Thank you Ezgi for reviewing. You were right on the year, so I went ahead and corrected it. I was off by two years.

HnM skinnys: Thank you for reviewing.

wrighthangal: I actually based a lot of the Serena/Nate/Casey plot on your review, so thank you. You'll see later on. I love writing Ari, and Eddie will come in (whenever Blair goes back *spoiler alert* lol). Mel is definitely not going anywhere.

Myria: Thank you for loving this story.

TheColorPurple: Thank you enjoying it and reviewing. I'll have to check out your stories :) Actually I have to reconnect with the fandom. But, more will be revealed on the Serenate front as well as Chair.

Isabella Waldass: Isa where are you? I haven't heard from you in weeks! Anyways, I know you hate Serena so here's some nice sort of bashing. And did you call me Duck? Oh Melanie returns! Flashbacks and Nate's sort of awesomeness. Sorry dudette :( for being MIA from this story.

LuLu . LG (Idk why but the username is not showing up): Sorry, which is all I can really say for the updating. GG is hard to write for these days. I did try to make the chapter longer so hopefully that will make up my absent. Oh NJBC will reunite… in more ways than some

Special Thanks to to I. and C. for making sure this chapter got done, otherwise this story would have just finished where I left it.