Edward was sitting on the edge of the bed, his back to me. He was slumped, his arms resting on his legs. His shirt was off and the small amount of light coming in through the cracked window sent a small array of rainbows onto the wall in front of him. He didn't move or breath, I wasn't even sure he had heard me. His hair hung around his features in messy folds, hiding his face from my view.

But it was him. His scent, his hair, his body…close enough for me to reach out and touch him, feel him. His image in my mind had not done him justice. He was more perfect than I had remembered from my weak human memory, more perfect than anything should ever be…and somehow, this perfect being, this angel, was mine.

I restrained myself from running across the room like I wanted to and walked hesitantly towards him, taking cautious steps, but he didn't look up. He didn't make any indication he even knew I was there.

"Edward," I called softly, standing across from his statue-like position on the bed, his back still to me. "It's me, Edward. It's Bella."

Nothing.

I walked around to the other side of the bed and kneeled in front of him. His head was bowed, his face hidden from me. I hesitated, using small, measured movements, and lifted his chin with my hand.

His eyes were empty, like black, vacant tunnels. I didn't see any life in them…he was like an empty shell. Never, even when his eyes had been black with hunger had his eyes ever looked so….dead. I put my hands on either side of his face and kept his eyes level with mine.

"Edward!" My voice cracked. "Edward! It's me! It's Bella!"

He was so lifeless, so still. For the first time, his hand felt fragile in mine.

I took one of his hands to my face and cupped it across my cheek. "It's me, see? It's really me. Please, Edward, wake up!" I cried. The moments seemed to pass so slow, each second weighing heavier on my panic-stricken heart. What if my Edward was really gone?

Just then his hand twitched under mine and I stopped moving. His hand twitched again. Slowly, his motionless hands moved up to my hair, where he pinched a long weft of hair between his forefingers. He held it lightly, carefully examining it. He sat that way for a several moments, just staring at the hair between his fingers.

"Edward?"

His eyes fell down to my face. He stared blankly; his eyes still held the same dead look. His eyes seemed to look past me, never quite looking at my face.

"It seems so real." He whispered, barely audible for even my ears. He released the hair and stared down at me in horror.

"It is," I answered. "I'm here."

"You look just like her…your hands are the same," He held my hand gently, cradling it before his eyes. "Yes…the same small hands. You even smell a little like her." His voice was flat as he spoke. His hand had moved from my hand to my chin, rotating it left and right as he examined it.

Suddenly his hand dropped from my face and his face broke.

"But you can't be Bella. Bella is dead. She's dead because I couldn't save her…I let her die," He said standing suddenly and was across the room. His hand was in his hair, pulling madly. His hand collided with the wall, leaving a burst of dust and a hole. His face was twisted with the most unimaginable hurt. My insides screamed for me to go to him, to just put an end to that horrible look on his face, just to do what ever it took, but it wasn't right for my Edward to have so much pain.

"Edward…" I whispered. His fast response startled me.

He turned as if suddenly noticing me for the first time, his face contorted with rage.

"What are you?" He growled, stooping down into a defensive crouch. His teeth were bared and his arms were out, ready to attack. His eyes were unrecognizable as he glared at me. I stood motionless, unable to move. I was terrified. Not terrified of the fact he was ready to fly across this room and kill me, I was terrified because he didn't recognize me…he couldn't see through the vampire façade to me - the real me.

"Edward, it's me! It's Bella!" I screamed loudly. Downstairs, I heard the rush of several feet to the stairs, and then halted halfway up.

"What the hell are you?!!" He screamed, locking in the attack position. "Bella is dead! Are you some demon come to torture me? Come to take the rest of my sanity? Take it, whatever you want, it's yours. I don't CARE anymore!! I don't want to live! My Bella is gone!! What more CAN you take?!!" He was screaming loudly, his voice echoing loudly off the high ceiling room, his pain piercing my heart. He was twitching violently, as if any second he was going to fly across the room and tear me to pieces. I didn't care, I'd take it; anything to just have his hands on me again. I wanted his touch, I craved it. He had backed into the corner now, still vibrating and growling maniacally.

Without thinking, without worrying that he was ready to potentially kill me the second I did, I ran to him.

I threw his arms around him and I sobbed. "Edward! Please! Edward, it's me!" I reached up as fast as I could my hand finding his cheek. His teeth were still bared, his eyes staring down at me wildly. I pulled his face down to mine; I kissed the side of his mouth, and his cheek, before kissing him full on the mouth.

Even knowing I was still in danger, more over that I was in danger by the person I loved, I felt whole. I felt right. Feeling him in my arms, my mouth on his, this is what I had been missing to complete my broken, useless heart. The hole in my chest was gone; the tightness which had constricted around me was freed. This was where I was one piece. This is where I truly, irrevocably belonged.

I felt his hands fall to his sides and he started to fall back. I lifted him to the bed, where he fell onto his back. I lay next to him, my hand still on his cheek, still kissing his face. Wherever I could find a place to land my lips, I did.

Suddenly, his hand came up to my face. I froze again, pulling back and staring into his eyes.

He was there; I could see it, right there in his eyes. There was a light in the depths of his black eyes. His expression was incredulous, still frozen staring fixedly on my face.

His chest was racked with tight silent sobs, his face incredulous. His thumbs circled my face, brushing under my eyes and down my cheek. He pushed my hair away out of my face, and I leaned into his touch, craving more.. His fingers ran down my neck where they stopped on Laurent's scar. He circled the scar lightly with his finger tips for what seemed like an hour – or perhaps it was only a second. Time didn't mean anything; nothing did, except that fact that I had Edward here in my arms.

His eyes were back to mine, and they finally understood.

"Bella," He breathed, bringing both hands to my face. He pulled me on top of him and put his forehead to mine. "Bella, I thought I had lost you…I saw it all happen, I saw it. I couldn't do anything. Bella, my Bella." He wrapped both arms around me and hugged me tighter than he had ever held me before. Our bodies were contoured tightly to each other, like a perfect puzzle piece. His arms moved across my back, pulling me in as tight as possible, and yet not tight enough.

He stopped abruptly and flipped me over so he was suddenly on top of me; one arm supporting his weight, the other cupped my face. His eyes were panicked as looking in my eyes.

"Bella, that day, when I left - how could you believe anything I said? After each time I had told you I loved you, each time I swore my love – and you still believed every word I said. Why didn't you demand I stay? Or demand I explain myself? But when you believed me…with just one word…it was almost unbearable." His lips found mine over and over again. "I wanted to keep you safe…I didn't know that my leaving would leave you in the worst kind of danger…I condemned you. I could have protected you. But Bella, I was wrong, I can't live without you. You are my life…no, more. You are my everything. You are essential to me, in every meaning of the word. You are essential for my happiness; my very existence. I can't survive in this world without your touch, you laughter, your voice."

His hands memorized my face and I melted into each touch. Forgotten feelings and emotions were mixed with this incredible happiness. I was suddenly aware of his body pressing into mine, his feverish heated kisses on my lips and face. I had forgotten this lust…this need. I didn't speak, or maybe I couldn't. His voice was music in the air, each touch of his hand was electrifying – like a current. My chest was full to bursting - there was no better high than this.

His hand stopped on my arm as he felt the disfigured scars under his finger tips. He pulled his lips from mine, his expression breaking again and the torture in his eyes was apparent. The bliss I had felt was gone. He pulled away like he had been shocked, and my heart broke. "Bella, I shouldn't have left, I shouldn't have let you go. Everything that's happened to you, everything you've been through – it's because of me." The same empty eyes flashed as he continued to talk. "How can you even stand to look at me, even stand to touch me knowing what I've done to you?"

He sat up off of me suddenly and tried to stand, but I grabbed his arm and pulled him back.

"Edward," I said, staring straight into his eyes, my hands on his face. "Every step, every breath – each and everyday, everything I did was to find a way back to you. This is the only place where I am meant to be." I could see the light returning to his eyes, his breathing was ragged and heavy as he listened. "That's what neither of us seems to understand, until now that is – we were made to love each other. Without you, I existed but I didn't live. I searched and traveled, looking for something to make me real; make me feel alive, not knowing that my reason was right here with you. You are my everything Edward. My now, and my always."

Edward's eyes were locked with mine, unmoving. He seemed to be taking in everything I said, absorbing it. A slow smile broke across his face that made my chest burst. He put his forehead against mine and lifted his hands to my face, caressing it with his fingers.

His hand moved down to my sleeve which was still rolled up, showing the horrible scars. He pulled my arm up, his face incomprehensible. He lifted my arm to his lips and kissed the length of my arm, covering all of the healed wounds. I slipped out of his grasp and put my arm around him, pulling him tightly to me. He smiled, melting into my touch and falling closer into the mattress next to me.

"I love you, Bella Swan."

I pulled his face closer to mine, speaking softly against his velvet lips.

"I love you, Edward Cullen."

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

A/N

Edward is back!

Hope everyone enjoys it, I must have rewritten this chapter 2 or 3 times.

I love love love all of the reviews, I love each of you!