A/N: Updateee! I attempted to make Kagome make sense, but usually when things are going awry it's hard to make sense of anything. Anyways, thank you for all the reviews! I was a little worried about what everyone would've thought about the chapter in Kagura's POV, but I'm glad everyone liked it!

Disclaimer: I don't own InuYasha or anything else mentioned in this story; duh. XD
Rated: Mature For crude language, sexual references, and mature situations.

CHAPTER 20

I sat silently in class half listening to Mr. Banryu's tale of how he got his new pet sugar gliders, which were currently in the classroom jumping from person to person. Sango's desk had been empty for about three weeks now. I think I spent more time in class gazing at her desk than I did taking notes.

I missed her. I missed her like crazy, I wouldn't deny that, but I still couldn't face her after what had happened. No, not after that kiss. Not after watching her cry.

Just thinking about it brought tears to my eyes, and what was worse was that this fear of seeing her again kept me away from the hospital after what had happened to her and Kagura. I hadn't seen Sango for a little over three weeks. I'd thought about going to her house a trillion times, but would she want to see me? Would she want to see this coward after so long? Would she hate me for breaking her heart?

I was jolted from my thoughts as I felt one of the small, furry creatures land on my arm. Its claws sunk into my sleeve, startling me because they were very sharp. A few people laughed but Koga gave me a worried look. InuYasha and Rin did as well. I blushed and kept my eyes glued on the animal which was scaling my shoulder. Once getting there it jumped from my shoulder, backwards onto the desk behind me. (1)

My thoughts once again claimed me after the animal had left my body.

After class, I left quickly, not wanting to hear anything anyone had to say to me. Koga didn't seem to mind the space I gave him and InuYasha watched after me, debating whether or not to approach me like he always did. He had approached me after finding out Sango was in the hospital. I refused to talk to him, too frightened by hearing about Sango's state.

"Kagome, Sango's in the hospital," he said finally, after I refused to listen to him. I stopped walking in the middle of the nearly empty hallway near my science class. He had been following me.

"She's in the hospital. She'd been in a coma for almost a week," he whispered. I swallowed hard with a dry throat. I refused to answer, not knowing what to do. Would Sango even want me there after what had happened between us? Shouldn't I go anyways? Would I be able to face her? There was no doubt that I wanted to see her. I cared a lot about Sango. She was, unknowingly my first friend here at this school. And when she became a best friend to me, I couldn't have been happier. I had had best friends back at my old school, but those relationships seemed empty and lacking compared to the deep connection Sango and I shared.

I was just afraid. I was afraid of her and how she felt. I was also slightly afraid of how she made me feel.

"She's in a terrible mood and is hurting all over. She'd really… appreciate you there."

I took a deep breath.

"Please Kagome," he mumbled."She won't be back at school. If you want to make amends, now's the time to do it. Now's the time to make things right. If Sango weren't so broken about what happened, she'd approach you herself. I've never seen her like this before- especially not over something like this."

"Stop," I finally said. "Stop it. I can't see her. I'm scared. I doubt she wants to see me anyways," I whispered before pushing the door open to my science class and stepping in.

Ever since then, InuYasha kept his distance. I could feel his eyes on me all the time though. His warm, honey colored eyes gazing at me, waiting for me to make the mistake of looking at him. (2) He loved her so much. Why couldn't she just love him back? He didn't deserve to hurt the way he did. Why did she have to like me? Why didn't he look at me with disdain and jealousy? Why were these people so strange?

I didn't see InuYasha all day or Koga for that matter. I didn't worry much about Koga, because I'd see him after school. Rin did approach me when I was in the library.

"Hey Kagome," she said taking a seat next to me. When I saw that she held no books or papers, I tensed, wondering what was going to come next.

"Hey Rin," I replied, closing my book around my finger as to not lose the page I was on.

"So… InuYasha's been bugging me about talking to you," she said in a hinting kind of way. "I guess he figures you won't run away from me." She smiled and I smiled back.

"He's right, you know," I replied giving her my full attention. I was far too tired of running to actually attempt it at that moment.

"Ok, so I don't know the whole deal with Sango, but I do know that InuYasha really thinks it'd be a good idea if you went and visited her. I guess you couldn't go see her in the hospital when she was there."

"I was busy," I lied, shamelessly.

"Mhmm," Rin hummed in a disbelieving way. "Well, I sent her a card. I decided what happened to her was terrible and absolutely frightening. Good thing that freak's in jail."

I felt even guiltier after hearing Rin had sent her a card. Rin, the girl who didn't even look like she'd talk to Sango and here I was, the ex-best friend. I felt like shit actually.

"I really did want to go see her," I confessed. "It's just we… got into an argument. We aren't friends anymore and even though I want to go see her, I'm afraid of how she'll react to me."

"Oh, so that's what it is," Rin realized before puffing up her cheeks slightly, being cute, effortlessly. "But, Kagome that would've been the perfect way to fix things."

"I know, I just… I'm afraid of what she'll say to me."

"Gees, what were you guys arguing over?" she asked and I blushed. Biting my tongue, I shook my head to tell her I didn't want to share that. "Well Sango's changed a lot. I don't think she'd say much about you visiting her. I noticed that she kind of just lets things happen and doesn't worry much about why. I'm thinking of visiting her too, just one last time. I heard she got into a really good college and that she'll be starting there in the fall. Don't waste your summer being afraid; you might not get your chance to talk things out with her."

My mouth felt dry. I hadn't heard about Sango leaving. She'd never mentioned applying for college at any moment I was with her, but I doubted Rin would ever lie to me. Sighing I nodded.

"I'll try," I said softly, wondering how to feel about this.

"Please do," a voice from behind us said. I glanced over my shoulder to see InuYasha standing there staring at me mercilessly. "She wants to talk, Kagome. She never says it, but I can tell. I know Sango better than she knows herself."

Rin quickly excused herself, waving farewell to the both of us. I looked after her longingly, wondering why she had left me alone with InuYasha.

"I don't know, InuYasha," I mumbled looking down at the book that l held. "Maybe she feels like that, or maybe not. I don't think it's your place to determine what she wants."

He looked at me with a stony gaze before dropping it and dejectedly dropping down onto the couch. He sighed, seeming years older than before and I frowned. I could tell he was definitely stressed out about stuff. He should be relaxing and enjoying his senior year; not losing sleep over Sango and other things. I knew InuYasha was a warm person, but past that, I didn't know too much.

"You're right. If I hadn't been deciding things for her, she'd be better off. She wouldn't be so depressed and out of touch. If I hadn't told her to take a chance with you…" I wondered if he was speaking of Sango regressing; reverting back into the cold angry person she used to be.

He stopped talking and I looked up to find him with an exasperated look on his features. He glanced at me before offering a wry smile.

"I shouldn't be complaining to you. That's not fair," he concluded before standing. "I'll see you later. Just, please consider visiting Sango. She misses you, I can tell."

I missed her too. I wanted to see her. I waved a farewell to InuYasha's retreating form.

Later that day, Koga and I went to the mall. We ended up just walking around, holding hands and talking. He bought himself some new running shoes and got me a pair, suggesting it would be nice to run together sometime. I blushed wondering if it had anything to do with my weight or something… He'd never said anything about exercising or running together until he saw me nude.

Yes, Koga had seen me nude. Koga had seen everything; I'd seen everything. We'd… felt everything.

Koga was, in many ways, far too perfect. I was suspicious of his handsome face and perfect body. I was suspicious of his punkish voice and his love for me. I, of course, loved him too, but at times… at times I wondered if it was all just a cruel joke. Never would I have dreamed to have met a guy like him who'd love me unconditionally. I would have never dreamed of having someone like Koga. What did he see in me anyways? I was the super nerd, who was strangely social, but still undeniably a loser. I guess I was pretty… he hadn't said anything to compliment my physical appearance since…

God, why did I sleep with him?

I felt like I had made a huge mistake. I would've felt even worse had he left me afterwards, but he didn't. He still loved me; he told me that every day. He just seemed distant, perhaps repulsed by my appearance, by my body. I figured I had gained a few pounds over the past couple of months, since moving here, but it wasn't like excessive weight gain that would be physically noticeable. At least, I didn't think… (3)

Maybe I was over analyzing things. Maybe he suggested running because he wanted to spend more time with me. He did spend a lot of time running on his own and for track. Gees, why didn't I just have the courage to ask him why? I knew why; because my ideas were absolutely ridiculous and he'd laugh and I'd never hear the end of it.

Koga dropped my hand and I looked up at him. His eyes were elsewhere, but he quickly gave me his attention.

"I'm going to go to the bathroom," he said, a little too quickly, before turning down the corridor and heading into the public bathroom. I turned, to see what he had been looking at before and my heart stopped beating in my chest.

Sango was walking towards where I was standing, talking to a small, pale girl just about Rin's height. She didn't seem to notice me and I wondered if I could make an abrupt exit like Koga had. Why did he leave anyways? Sango didn't hate him too much- well, maybe she did… I didn't know, but it wasn't like she was going to try to beat him up or something. Maybe he was in cahoots with InuYasha and Rin and he wanted me to sort things out with her, I mused.

She still hadn't looked up as she approached. I noticed that she wore her hair down and it seemed wavy; shinier and darker as well. It had grown in length too and looked absolutely brilliant. As she came closer still, I noticed a slight discoloration of her skin around her left eye. When she finally looked up, it was when she was passing right by me. She stopped suddenly, catching the smaller girl of guard. The younger girl stumbled a bit, terribly awkward.

Her deep green eyes met mine and my breath hitched in my throat. The girl who stood by Sango seemed to fade away into the distance; all I could see were her familiar emerald eyes gazing at me intently. Pain, confusion, anger, longing, sadness, happiness; everything seemed to be swirling around in her eyes until she turned away with a hardened look. A frown tugged at the corners of her lips.

"Sango," I said, finally finding my voice.

I saw her jaw muscles clench and I braced myself for her to start yelling at me, calling me a terrible person. Accusing me of the things I embodied; cowardice, weakness, unreliability. Sango only grabbed a hold of the smaller girl's hand before calmly saying two words.

"Fuck off."

And the two of them walked away; the smaller girl did so hesitantly, glancing backwards at me with an apologetic look. Her dark eyes unnerved me. Who was she?

Koga returned moments later and he immediately noticed something was wrong. Maybe it was the wetness of my eyes or the embarrassed blush on my cheeks. Maybe it was how shaken I seemed to be. Whatever the case was, we left the mall avoiding talking about Sango. When we got to his house, I fell prey to his charming ways again and spent my time there in his bed. He drove me home, wishing me goodnight, noticing that I was still upset.

I cried myself to sleep even more bothered than I was before about everything. My life wasn't where I wanted it to be.

The next morning, Souta seemed to notice my silence. I was just sitting on the couch, watching Saturday morning cartoons in my pajamas. He sat beside me, his eyebrows pulled upward in surprise at what was on, but he spoke no words.

I was just thinking about Koga and Sango. More about Sango than Koga, however. She was angry with me, obviously, but I could tell she wanted to talk to me. I was afraid, though, because I was imagining what could have happened had we not been in a public place. She would've told me exactly how she felt, because that's how Sango was and she'd use every curse word in the English language. I frowned knowing that I had hurt her deeply… but she'd get over me, right? She was getting over me right?

Who was that girl? That small, prepubescent girl she was holding hands with. I never saw her as a cradle robber, but that girl looked so… well she didn't look young. Her face held maturity that surpassed even mine, but everything about her body was absolutely tiny and I mean everything. I frowned at this thought, knowing it was fueled by jealousy. That wasn't me; I was rarely one to be jealous. I bit my lip, feeling bad about insulting this girl I didn't know.

"Kagome?" Souta asked me, causing me to start.

"Yeah?" I questioned.

"Are you ok? I mean, I'm a bit worried, that's all."

I looked away from his concerned brown eyes to see that commercials were playing on TV. Of coursed he'd divert his attention then.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Why do you-"

"You're sitting here watching Pokémon. I think I have a right to ask," he commented dryly. I blushed silently, feeling a bit stupid; but hey, there was nothing wrong with Pokémon. Well… at least it used to be cool.

"Yeah, ok, there's something wrong."

"Sango?"

I blushed, feeling raw and exposed, like a fresh wound. How did he know?

As if my face had confirmed his question he replied, "Well, I figured there was something wrong after you refused to go see her when she was in the hospital after the attack."

"You wouldn't understand," I mumbled, feeling a bit annoyed with him.

"Understand what? How a stupid argument would keep you at home when your friend needed you the most?"

"Souta, shut up. You wouldn't understand."

"You know what?" he asked, with his eyes burning in disbelief. "You're just a terrible person."

What? What gave him the right to say that?

"And why do you say that?" I struggled to keep my patience with him.

"How can you not go and see her? How can you just abandon someone you considered your best friend like that?!"

"Sango and I… we just can't be friends anymore. You wouldn't understand!"

"I wouldn't understand what?! That-"

"She kissed me Souta! Sango kissed me… I can't be the same way around her. She… she likes me and I don't like her back and I can't stand to be around her when she's all depressed about me rejecting her."

His mouth fell open and his eyes widened.

"Yeah," I snapped at him. "I thought so," I was pleased that he had finally shut up, but embarrassed about him knowing about what went on with Sango.

"Whoa," he said, taking a seat as if in a daze. And then suddenly, he turned to glare at me with hard brown eyes. "Dude, Kagome, as if you didn't know she was gay."

"I did, I just… didn't think… Well, you know."

"Yeah right," the younger boy scoffed. "I still don't think that gives you the right not to go see her when she's hurt. It probably hurt her feelings. I bet she was hoping you'd show up and you didn't. Imagine how… disappointed she probably was."

"I know!" I exclaimed, fed up with people telling me that I did the wrong thing. I knew I had done the wrong thing, but I couldn't go back into the past. That was impossible. If there was a way to fix things, I'd have to move past my stupid moments and approach the issue from a different angle.

"I'm really sorry that I didn't go see her, but there's nothing I can do about that now and she's obviously pissed at me, so I don't know anymore."

"She's pissed at you?" he asked as Pokémon came back on after the commercial.

"Oh come on, this is Sango we're talking about. Plus, I saw her at the mall and I tried to talk to her and she told me to 'fuck off'." Frowning, I fought to keep the tears from my eyes.

"I totally deserve this," I mumbled before losing Souta's attention to the television.

1- so this definately happened to me in Calc last year. XD I really like sugar gliders though, they're incredibly adorable.
2- this isn't really footnote material, but one of my friends has the most beautiful honey colored eyes, ever, hands down.
3- psh, whatever Koga. Chubby girls ftw! ^_^

Thanks for reading! Hopefully that shed just a bit of light on the situation from Kagome's angle. I hope everyone took note of all the hidden elements; this chapter is VERY important to the rest of the story. Please review,
Enigmatic Ethereality