Relapse

Chapter 4

A/N: Thank you for the reviews guys.

I let out a laugh and roll my eyes.

"Chlo, there's no way the whole football team is gonna beat me up." I stand up and hold out my arm to help Chloe up. She gently takes my hand as if she'll break my arm if she grips too hard. Quickly, I yank her to her feet and offer a smirk at her surprised expression.

"I dunno Becs... I don't want you to get hurt any more than you already are." Ignoring her look of pity, I turn around to travel up to my room. She follows me up the carpeted steps and down the hallway into my room, and shuts the door behind us.

"Yeah, yeah. Thanks Chlo, but as soon as the truth comes out everything will be good." Even though I'm pissed off and a bit scared, I don't think anyone will believe Ryan's story.

"Speaking of everything being 'good', as you say, tell me what been going on with you." Chloe plops onto my bed and pats the empty space next to her. Sighing, I instinctively cross my arms. Instead of sitting next to her I prop a few pillows against my headboard and lean on them.

"...Do we have to talk about it?" I ask. Honestly I wish Chloe could forget about it.

"Yes Becs." She crawls to where I'm positioned and gestures toward my crossed arms. "Open." She says. Of course I don't object, and she is now sitting in between my legs with her head on my chest.

"Alright Red, if you insist. What'd you wanna know?" I ask. Instead of verbally answering, she points at my arm. "...Right." I don't really know how to start to be honest. I spend around a half a minute thinking of how to explain this to her.

"I just need to know why you broke your promise." She whispers, breaking my thoughts. I run my right hand through her red locks, still pondering my response.

"I don't know." I finally say, answering honestly. "I'm just... tired, ya know? This-" I point at my arm. "This is just stress relief." Chloe runs her thumb lightly across the fresh ones.

"Stress relief? Becs you go to the spa if you want to relieve stress, not this." I scoff. I've never been to the spa in my life.

"No you go to the spa to relieve stress. That isn't me. I'm not like you." Realizing my harsh tone, I take it down a notch. "...I'm sorry Chlo."

"It's okay.." She says. I can here the sincerity in her voice, but I know it isn't okay.

"No it's not." I take my hand from her scalp and let it drop into the comforter. "See, this is another reason why I cut." Chloe cringes at the word. I find myself wishing I would've used different wording. "I'm such a bitch to everyone. I don't deserve friends, and I definitely don't deserve you."

I let out a shaky breath and close my eyes. I feel Chloe move in my lap and reopen my eyes warily. Suddenly she's facing me, her calves resting on my thighs and feet resting against the headboard. Her bright blue eyes are, once again, looking straight into my navy ones.

Well this is awkward...

I feel heat rising in my cheeks and look away.

Is she smirking? ..Does she know what she does to me?!

When I look back at my red headed friend, I take notice that she is not in fact smirking, and she actually looks vaguely pissed off.

So my mind is playing tricks on me now. Two hands rest on each side of my face.

"Beca, don't you ever say that. You are the sweetest girl I know." I give her a look. "Well, at times you can be a little rough around the edges." I nod.

"Thanks Chlo, that means a lo-"

"I'm not done. You're the swee-" She corrects herself. "One of the sweetest people I know on this Earth, and you deserve the world. I can't believe you think you don't deserve me, if anything, I don't deserve you! I love you so much Beca, words can't describe." Once again, I nod. Even though she doesn't love me the way I'd like her to one day, I'll take any love I can get.

Who are you kidding? She'll never love you. You know that, so stop kidding yourself and move on. She's you best friend.

Sighing, I pull Chloe into me and wrap my arms around her. She returns the hug with some force, as if she's trying to force her affection into me.

"I love you too, Red. So much."

.

I'm laying on my back in bed staring at the ceiling of my room, when legs untangle from mine and Chloe climbs out of my bed. Footsteps echo through my room as she enters the bathroom, not even closing the door.

Chloe stayed with me the whole weekend. All we really did was lounge around and watch movies. Cuddling was involved, which I definitely "hate". That's what I tell her anyways. I think she stayed with me to monitor rather than actually spend time with me. I'm not complaining though.

Now it's Monday, and I have to go to school. School, a place that is not pleasant for me. School, where I'm supposedly going to be beaten today. By the football team. Yippee.

I hear the toilet flush and the running of the sink. I roll into the middle of the bed on my stomach and close my eyes, debating whether or not I should even go to school. I could just drop out and move to a remote island, never hearing from anyone ever again. But that's cowardly, and I may be a lot of things, but cowardly isn't one. Plus I'd miss Chloe.

The bed dips and suddenly I weigh much more.

"Hey Becs." Chloe says. She's currently spread eagle on my back, and I honestly can't breathe. I try to politely ask her to get the hell off before I die, but my request is muffled to the point where even I can't understand it. Trying another tactic, I kick my legs like a child until she rolls off of me, giggling. I pick up my face and can't help but laugh.

"Ok Beale, if I would've known you were planning to murder me I wouldn't have let you stay with me this whole weekend." I joke. Chloe snuggles into me. When I say snuggle, I mean she literally rubbed her face into my neck. I'm glad she can't see my face because my infamous blush appears again.

"Us murderers don't usually tell the victim that we're planning to kill them. I mean, that's a known fact isn't it?" Our conversation about murderers and murdurees lasts a good five minutes. After a good laugh, I decide it's time to get ready for school. Reluctantly, I escape Chloe's cuddling and swing my feet over the edge of the bed.

"What're you doing?" Chloe asks. I do a mental check to make sure that it's actually Monday.

"Don't we have school?" I say, swinging my legs back on the bed.

"Do you want to go?" She asks.

"No."

"Me either."

"..."

"C'mon let's stay here. Pleaseee?" Chloe sports a pout with puppy dog eyes, but I resist the urge to give into her wishes.

"Neh. As much as I'd love to waste away in my bedroom, school is 'important'." I say, not even realizing how bad that sounded. I quickly cover it up. "I don't mean waste away as in like.. die. I meant waste time, ya know?"

Ughhh, I'm such an idiot.

"Yeah. Okay." She says.

With that, we both get ready for school. Conversations continue, and when we're both dressed 'n' stuff we eat some eggs and bacon that I quickly whipped up and head out the door.

Upon exiting the house, I immediately notice that something is wrong with my car. The usual glint on the side has like a line or something in it.

Now what...

I slowly walk towards it and find that's someone's etched into my car. Probably with keys. My car got keyed.

"What the fuck!" A long line runs along both sides of the car, and on the rear bumper "dyke" is scratched into the dark paint. "I swear to fucking god." I seathe.

Chloe walks toward the vehicle, assessing the damage. "Oh no..."

"This is gonna cost so much fucking money..." I run my fingers through my wavy hair, and almost have to stop myself from pulling it out of my scalp. "Forget it." I mutter. I grasp Chloe's hand and lead her to the passenger side, quickly unlocking the door with my keys and opening it to let Chloe in. Though I'm honestly in the mood to beat the shit out of whomever did this, I give her a smile. "After you."

"Thanks Becs." She says. Before getting in, she plants a kiss on the side of my mouth. I freeze for a split second before recovering and making my way over I the drivers side.

That was dangerously close to being on my lips..

I get in the car, buckle my seatbelt, and fumble around with the keys.

Just stop, she'll never want you like that. Ever.

I start the engine and pull out of the driveway. Just as we're nearing the end of the street, Chloe takes my right hand and intertwines our fingers.

"It'll be okay Becs, I promise." She kisses my hand. Holding hands is normal for us, but this is different.

This is two 'kisses' in less than two minutes... Maybe she does like me?

She begins rubbing her thumb against my fingers, which is honestly awkward since our fingers are intertwined.

This is going to be a long day...

A/N: Hey sorry for the short chapter lol.