Finally! The long awaited chapter 4. Thanks for being so patient with me. A quick side note, I'm not from Canada and I did add some things in this chapter about federal cops (still not entirely sure how that works) if I got it wrong I apologize. Anyway, enjoy :-)
Chapter Four
"We're going to be so late." Gail groaned tilting her head back against the wall in Holly's foyer, feeling Holly's lips smile against her skin before the pleasant hum that came as Holly's agreement. They were supposed to meet everyone at the Penny, it being a Saturday night that they could spent drinking too much and spending time with friends. In reality, neither one of them had wanted to get out of bed. They'd spent all day getting lost in each other, hours blurring together in a pleasurable haze.
"Do you want me to stop?" Holly asked pausing the exploration of her hands and halting her kisses.
"Don't you dare." Gail growled, closing her fist around Holly's hair tugging slightly. Holly felt a jolt of pleasure shoot through her body at Gail's dominance. Even though it was clear Holly had the upper hand in their current situation that didn't mean that Gail was going to play a passive role. Their previous love making had been sensual and sweet, this was different.
Gail gasped at the sharpness of Holly's grip, the way her fingers dug into her skin, nails dragging along her skin hard enough to leave angry red marks. Moving just the fraction of an inch closer to Gail, pushing the blonde hard against the wall so there wasn't even room for air between them Gail sensed that just the subtlest grip of her hand had awoken something in Holly and her entire body shivered with excitement. Holly was about to fuck her. She could see it in the intensity of Holly's gaze, the focus, and the raw want that reflected in Holly's dark eyes.
A sharp cry tore from Gail's throat when she felt Holly enter her suddenly, biting her collar bone at the same time creating an intoxicating mixture of pleasure and pain. Her hips moving of their own accord to match Holly's thrusts. Gail held onto Holly for dear life, sure that Holly was the only thing holding her up. Moans and curse words fell from Gail's lips as she let Holly fuck her, she was powerless to do anything else she was surprised she even remembered to breath.
Recognizing the signs that Gail was fast approaching climax Holly pulled her mouth away from Gail's neck, as tempting as it was to remain there she wanted to see Gail. The blonde's head was tilted back against the wall exposing the long column of her neck, her eyes shut tight and her lips parted as she gasped hungrily for air. It was the look of someone lost in pleasure and knowing that she was the one that was giving that pleasure to Gail was enough to send Holly spiraling towards her own climax. Still, lost as she was Gail managed to slide her thigh in between Holly's legs and push upwards, satisfied when she heard Holly groan.
"Jesus." Holly groaned dropping her forehead against Gail's shoulder the pleasure coursing through her whole body made it impossible to focus on anything else. They both lost themselves in their frenzied rhythm until finally with one last expert stroke of her thumb against Gail's clit Gail fell over the edge and allowed the waves of her climax to sweep her up into euphoria. She felt it throughout her entire body, in her fingertips and tips of her toes.
When Gail finally came back to her senses, tremors of pleasure still making her unsteady she looked up at Holly with such an open vulnerability it was unlike anything that Holly had ever seen before. It took a moment for Holly's own post orgasmic haze to fade enough for her to realize that Gail wasn't just feeling the after effects of an earth shattering orgasm but she was trembling. The kind of trembling someone might do if they were afraid, or feeling exposed. Both of those were not things that Holly wanted Gail to feel.
"Are you okay?" Holly asked cupping Gail's face and making the blonde look at her. Bright blue eyes shimmered at her while bottom lip trembled ever so subtly, if Holly weren't paying close attention to it she would have missed it. "Gail? Did I hurt you?"
Gail shook her head vehemently, she didn't know what was wrong with her. She'd never been the emotional sort after sex. It was easier for her to shut down emotionally after sex and just ride out the pleasure as long as possible. But like with so many other things with Holly, this was new. New and terrifying. Gail fell into Holly's arms, her arms thrown around Holly's neck pulling the brunette to her with a crushing intensity.
"Talk to me babe." Holly's soft, reassuring voice seemed to ease whatever it was that was happening to Gail. Only so much for Gail to realize that what she was feeling wasn't entirely unpleasant. It was the realization that she'd been battling for weeks, pushing down into the deepest parts of her mind so that she wouldn't have to deal with it. But now, standing with Holly like this she couldn't hide from it anymore.
"I think I love you." Gail said finally thankful that her voice didn't shake when she said the words. There were tons of more romantic ways she could profess her love for Holly. Especially the first time. But then it just wouldn't be Gail's style. And the fact that she spoke the words with such awe, like she'd never felt anything like it was utterly charming.
"Yeah?" Holly asked when she could find her voice. Gail nodded, biting her bottom lip and looking hesitantly at Holly. Expecting Holly to laugh, or to reject her, maybe tell Gail that she didn't feel that way about her and was only in it for the sex. Whatever Gail expected Holly to say, she wasn't imagining that it would be a positive reaction. She just wasn't prepared for Holly to smile at her, pull her into a gentle and loving kiss to put her mind at ease. "I love you too." Holly replied once the kiss was broken.
The smile that spread across Gail's face made the sun pale in comparison. Holly had never seen Gail light up the way that she was. She was loved. Gail didn't know how to explain to Holly what it felt like to know that she was loved for the first time just for being herself. With just three words Gail felt all the tension that she hadn't known she was carrying around with her fade into a warmth and excitement that filled her chest with each quickened heartbeat.
"Wow." Gail mused leaning against the wall and looking at her girlfriend. The remarkable woman that had somehow seen something in Gail that made her want to take the chance that most people thought was too risky.
"Seriously though, I didn't hurt you did I?" Holly asked worriedly. She hadn't been gentle, and while she had suspicions that Gail would be alright with taking things a little rougher, she still didn't know for sure.
"Babe, you didn't hurt me. That was amazing, feel free to do that anytime." Gail replied a hint of her usual snark sneaking back into her tone.
"I couldn't help it. You just look so good." Holly replied pushing away from Gail so that she could observe the perfection that was her girlfriend.
"I know, it's a curse."
"You going to be okay there stud? We're already late." Holly laughed, Gail definitely had the 'I just had the best sex of my life' look but she pulled it off well. There would be no denying that at least one if not all of her friends would be able to pick up on it but Gail didn't care.
"Just give me a minute. My legs are kinda jelly right now."
When the two women finally snuck into the Penny it was already crowded with cops from 15 and a few other divisions that didn't fear the repercussions of crossing divisional lines. It was easy enough to spot their group sitting around a large table towards the back of the bar. Holly would have gone straight over to them if Gail didn't pull her to the bar so that they could get their first round going. Gail would be far more receptive to their teasing if she had some alcohol in her system.
"You look nervous officer." Holly teased following Gail's attention towards her group of friends. They hadn't gone unnoticed when they arrived. Traci waved already and it looked like Andy was about to get up to greet them when Gail waved her off.
"Not nervous. It's just another night at the Penny." Gail said downing her tequila shot with practiced grace.
"Afraid they're going to know why we're late." Holly whispered in a low voice only Gail could hear over the chatter of the bar.
"Let them know." Gail replied with a casual shrug. She honestly didn't care if her friends knew that she and Holly had just had sex. The old Gail would have gloated about it. When she and Chris had been sleeping together, or when she was with Nick she didn't mind talking about how great the sex was. That wasn't the point. Holly was different. What they had was different, special in a way that Gail couldn't quite find words for. Blabbing the details just to garner the envy of her friends just didn't seem right in this case.
As they walked towards the table Holly felt Gail's hand slip into hers. It wasn't often that Gail actively sought out physical contact. She wouldn't fight it if Holly initiated it thought. Still, Holly glanced down at their hands while they weaved in an out of the crowd until they were standing in front of the table. Traci kicked out a chair for Holly while Gail stole one from another table and sat down.
"Glad you could join us." Steve commented a knowing smirk on his face.
"It looks like you guys were suffering without our awesomeness. So we took pity on you guys." Gail snapped back good naturedly. She was in a good mood and she doubted it was possible for anything to ruin that for her. Her hand slid across Holly's thigh, the tip of her middle finger playing with the in seam of Holly's jeans. The touch was concealed by the table but it was still something new that Holly hadn't expected. But Gail carried on conversation with her friends as if nothing were happening.
Holly's attention was drawn when she heard the noticeable sound of chair legs being drug across the floor, looking up just in time to see Chloe scoot the chair just the last bit so that she was sitting next to Holly. Like Gail was always talking about Chloe really did have an almost obnoxiously bright smile on her face.
"Hi?" Holly greeted more of a question than anything. She didn't know Chloe that well, other than the dealings they had during their work on various cases over the past few months. But Chloe was smiling at her like they had been friends for years and was expecting to gossip.
"Hi!" Holly fought the urge to cringe at the enthusiasm with which she was greeted. "I know we haven't met outside of work. I'm Chloe. I'm dating Dov." For emphasis Chloe pointed across the table at Dov who was talking with Chris and Steve about some suspect take down or another.
"I'm aware." Holly humored the girl. Holly was good with people. She always had been good with people, even when she didn't particularly get along with them. Chloe seemed to be an acquired taste but Holly wasn't going to mean just because Gail seemed to have an abhorrence for the perky girl.
"Of course you are. Gail probably told you all about me and how much she hates me."
"She doesn't hate you." Holly was quick to correct. She knew that Gail didn't really hate any of her co-workers despite what aura she liked to portray.
"It's just how Gail and I operate. Anyway, tell me about yourself. Gail's been keeping you to herself for so long. I wanna know everything."
"Everything? We'll be here for a while." Holly laughed at the thought.
"Cliff notes version then."
"You don't give up do you?" Holly asked though she was about to humor the redhead.
"Nope. Come on spill. It'll be easier and much less painful."
"Um okay. I went to the University of British Columbia for my undergrad and then McMaster University for medical school. I did my residency at Mount Sinai, went back to McMaster for my PhD work. Then got a job working forensic pathology for the city." Holly said sounding more like she was listing off her strengths for a job interview. When she was done she realized that she had somehow become the center of the table's attention. And it occurred to her that she was the only one that they didn't know. The rest of them had spent years together and knew pretty much everything about one another.
"Mount Sinai? That's impressive." Steve commented. He didn't know much about medical school residencies but he did know that Mouth Sinai was one of the best hospitals, if not the best hospital, in Canada.
"Thanks. It was fun, you know if subjecting yourself to years of sleep deprivation and working ridiculously long hours is your idea of fun." It actually was for Holly. She'd loved most everything about her residency and had absorbed as much information as she could while learning from the best doctors.
"So what exactly does it take to become a doctor?" This question came from Dov.
"Four year degree, premed, medical school, residency, and picking your specialty. When I picked pathology I had to go back to school and get my degree in that. I could have been done at that but I decided to get my PhD in pathology." Gail looked at her girlfriend, she knew Holly was smart and accomplished but for her own sanity and her own ego she had tried not to think too much on it. She didn't want to think of herself as inferior to her girlfriend. But now that she heard Holly explain what she'd had to go through to become as awesome as she was at her job Gail felt nothing but pride for her girlfriend.
"Nerd." Gail offered affectionately nudging Holly with her shoulder. Holly smiled warmly at Gail and then sipped her drink.
"Why would you subject yourself to that much school? I could barely survive through the academy and I was done with tests and studying." Andy wondered in awe.
"I like learning. No one likes tests but I think that if we don't push ourselves to continue learning we'll never reach our full potential. It doesn't have to be in an academic setting or anything but learning about the world we live in makes us appreciate it more."
"But why forensic pathology? I mean working on dead people, I can't see you making that decision when you were a little kid." Gail had always wondered why Holly had picked such a morbid profession. Especially when she had experienced first-hand how brilliant Holly was. She could see Holly working in a hospital in surgery or doing something that didn't involve being locked away in a room with dead bodies.
"I didn't know that's what I wanted to be until I was in medical school. One of my favorite instructors had been a forensic pathologist. She helped me see that while there are more glamourous medical professions, ones that would gain me better prestige and more money they were only treating the problem, not finding out what caused it. Not finding the final answers that family's want when someone they loves dies. I liked the idea of providing answers. The rest of the details are morbid and not fit for such situations." Holly replied knowing that Gail wanted to know the answer and the reassuring smirk she gave the blonde told Gail that if she still wanted to know the full story then later the two of them would talk about it.
"I'm just glad you're our pathologist. God, the guy at 27th is insufferable. And ancient." Steve said shaking his head at the memories spent waiting, and waiting, and waiting some more for results.
"Dr. Mansfield? Yeah, he's definitely a character." Holly was being generous. The man was a dinosaur. He didn't believe in the merits of advanced medicine so any case he worked on seemed to take that much longer. That, paired with the seemingly permanent aroma of formaldehyde that followed him everywhere made him less than ideal to work within close proximity.
"I think we'll keep ya Doc." Traci said with a warm smile. Holly liked Traci, she was the surrogate mother of their group and Holly suspected that it wasn't entirely because of the fact that she had her own son but because that was just her general personality. She loved each of them and she took care of them like they in turn took care of her and Leo. But Traci had a way with Gail, the two women had been through something that Holly had never felt right prying into. But she could see it whenever they talked, Gail checked her snark and her harshness when it came to Traci similar to the way that it was when Gail talked to Holly. There was no shortage of shark and sarcasm but the bite was gone her tone.
"Hey now, she's mine first. Remember that Detective." Gail warned with the narrowing of her blue eyes making the Detective laugh.
Over the course of the night as Gail became more and tipsier from the drinks that she was consuming she grew less shy about her affections for Holly. Where the night had started with her hand resting casually on Holly's thigh, present but discrete after a few drinks Gail moved her hand to actually clasp around Holly's on top of the table. The rarity of the contact was not lost on Gail's friends but they all had the good sense to not say anything. Not sure if they were more frightened by Gail or by Traci should they call attention to the softer side of Gail.
The sight hit Steve in a way he wasn't expecting. He and his sister had always been close, though that was only ever really apparent to him and Gail. They had grown up in the same house under their mother. They shared the experience of what it was like to have the world expected of them and the sting that it felt when their mother was disappointed in their lack of fulfillment of that expectation. But Steve had always been fiercely protective of Gail. Intervening whenever possible between his mother and sister. Even though Gail never fought back vocally against Elaine the words spoken about her might as well have been daggers. Gail had been a vibrant little girl, always full of energy and a lust for life that was as terrifying as it was enviable.
Gail was fearless as a child. She would take any bet, she would do anything regardless of the dangers posed by doing it. At eight years old she had accepted challenge from Steve to race to the half mile marker bobbing just off shore at a lake they used to frequent. She wanted to beat him so bad. But when she was about half way she started to lag behind. She wasn't going to quit though. She kept pushing. Finally Steve had to fake that he had gotten a cramp so that he could convince her to turn back so that she didn't drown. Where he had seen fearless bravery with a twinge of recklessness, their mother had only seen stupidity and had made sure that Gail knew it. Bit by bit Steve had watched as Gail lost that spark. One of his biggest regrets in life was not stopping it.
Still, seeing Gail sitting with Holly he caught a glimpse of the girl he had thought was lost. She smiled the genuine, bright smile that lit up her entire face. She wasn't mean, well, not with the intention to actually hurt. Holly was good for her sister, unlike the other losers that Gail had dated in the past who didn't challenge her. Holly kept Gail on her toes, and would give her a slightly reproachful look when Gail said something too harsh to one of her friends.
"You look lost in thought." Traci whispered leaning against Steve's shoulder. Steve looked over at his girlfriend with a smirk. Loving how well she knew him already.
"She's in love." Steve replied in a low voice nodding towards Gail who was too lost in Holly to notice that they were talking about her.
"That she is." Traci said.
"Looks good on her."
"She deserves it."
"What are you two whispering about over there?" Gail demanded slightly worrying when Traci and Steve whispered amongst themselves because it usually had something to do with her.
"Nothing." Both of them said at the same time before bursting out laughing. Gail obviously didn't believe them but she didn't push it either tonight was about having fun.
"I think they're talking about us Lunchbox." Gail stage whispered.
"I think they're talking about you officer."
"Same difference."
"Contrary to most lesbian stereotypes we're not the same person yet." Holly corrected teasingly. Gail shrugged and went back to her conversation with other people but her attention to Holly seemed to increase, her fingers moving to caresses instead of just contact.
Monday morning rolled around with nothing but paperwork to greet Holly. Mondays were like that, admin days and since she was the most senior pathologist that they had a lot of it fell on her to make sure people got their paperwork in order. Her inbox was filled with file after file that needed her signature or a second look. It was tedious but given the alternative Holly was happy to take the paperwork. Gail and her fellow rookies were back on patrol, something Holly wasn't overly thrilled with but she kept that kind of thing to herself.
The uneventful ended with an email from her boss just after 9am informing her of a staff meeting that had been called at the last minute. Staff meetings were rare in their office, messages meant for the entire staff were usually delivered via email. Holly blamed that on most of the people she worked with preferring the company of dead bodies to live ones. Grabbing her things Holly left her office and headed towards the conference room, she was one of the first to arrive and greeted her co-workers with a friendly nod or even a quiet 'hello' before sitting down.
Dr. Charles Warner had been Holly's boss since she had started at the pathology office. They got along famously, mostly because Charles knew Holly was capable and wasn't going to waste either of their times micromanaging. He was also not so secretly grooming her to take over for him when he took his inevitable retirement. When he entered the conference room it was with a look of deep consternation on his face. Whatever he had to tell them, he wasn't happy with it and thus they were probably going to not like it either.
"Thank you all for coming. I'll make this short so we can all get back to work. This afternoon we'll be joined in our offices by federal pathologists to go over the evidence of the recent killings." Charles looked at Holly specifically knowing that their presence if anything would be an insult to Holly over everyone else. But none of them liked it when the feds came in and messed with their labs.
"Do they think we missed something?" Holly asked expression schooled. She was livid. She hated dealing with the federal forensic specialists. Especially when they were usually suffering from some superiority complex and liked to hint that Holly and her team were barely capable of doing their jobs.
"No. But given the high profile nature of the case and the complexity of the evidence they want to come in and throw their resources at it." Charles answered leaning against the desk and folding his arms in front of him.
"The evidence isn't complex. It's non-existent. Come on Charles, if Holly couldn't find it then it isn't there." The praise came from the ballistics lead. They worked together a lot and had over the years developed a friendship on top of a pleasant working relationship.
"I know that. This isn't any slight against you Holly. But you know how these federal types are. If you even hint at a serial killer they come in waving their badges and making everyone else's lives difficult. Just, try and accommodate them as much as possible. Dr. Silas will be at your office just after lunch."
"Victoria Silas?" Holly asked. She knew that name. Most everyone knew that name, Victoria Silas was a very good pathologist, if there were a race of who was the best pathologist in Toronto it would be a tight race between Holly and Victoria.
"One in the same." Charles said unsure if the familiarity spawned from professional intrigue or something else.
"Fantastic." Holly said sarcasm dripping from her words.
"Try and be nice. She's only here to help."
"I'm always nice."
The meeting adjourned a little bit after that once Charles went over a few more house keeping things to make sure no one wondered why they were there. It was clearly just a meeting he needed to have with Holly. Charles stopped Holly on her way, he looked truly sympathetic.
"This has nothing to do with your performance Holly. I know how skilled you are." Charles insisted.
"I know Charles. Don't worry I'm not upset. It's just inconvenient." Holly said.
"Okay. If you could compile your notes for Dr. Silas I'm sure she'd appreciate it."
"I'll get right on that. Any idea when she was going to arrive?" Holly knew Victoria, they had come up in the same field together. Most people assumed that they were rivals because they were both up and coming in the same field. But there had never been bad blood between them.
"Some time later today. The feds don't want to take over the case Holly. They just want to help in any way they can."
"Thanks for the heads up Charles. I'll talk to you later."
Holly had barely reached her lab when her phone dinged several times in very quick succession, which meant that whoever was texting her had sent her a very long message that needed to be broken up into smaller ones. Holly guessed that it was Gail. If they were sending a federal forensic pathologist to help Holly out then it was reasonable to assume that they were also sending agents to help out 15. Holly doubted that Gail would be as open minded about it as Holly.
Gail Peck 8:42am: FED's Lunchbox. They are sending feds to 'help' us out. I mean, do they not think that we're capable? And you should see these guys. Their right out of a movie or something, suits and sunglasses. Only thing their missing is the ear pieces. –
They've been in with Frank and the D's for the last half an hour but they are having us pack up all the notes and files we have and-
Holly's reading was interrupted when her phone started to ring and Gail's name appeared across the screen. Apparently Gail had gotten tired of waiting for Holly to get back to her so she decided to call again.
"Feds Holly!" Gail exclaimed before Holly even had a chance to greet her. No one was happy when they saw the agents walking into the Division. They had, as they were known to do hijacked the case as if they'd been running it all along. Frank told them that they had to cooperate with the investigation but until he knew more they were just sharing information.
"I know, I've got one coming down to 'assist' me too." Holly replied understandingly. Though she never understood what it was about the territorial nature of cops and their hatred for outside assistance.
"Really? What is he like?" Gail asked sitting down on the bench in the locker room. They were all waiting around to see what was going to happen. And Gail really didn't want to be helping the agents collect all the files so she'd retired to the locker room to call Holly.
"She hasn't arrived yet. But I've worked with her before. She's not terrible." Holly answered casually. She could hear the hesitation on the other side of the line and couldn't tell if it was because Gail was distracted by something or if she was taken aback by the fact that the federal pathologist was female.
"What's she like?" Gail asked curiously. She didn't know any other pathologists so it seemed natural to be curious. Even though Gail was pretty sure that she was mildly jealous, even if she couldn't understand why she would be.
"Her names Dr. Silas. She and I have worked together on cases before. Usually I'm helping her out so this will be a change. Most people think we're rivals." Holly said.
"But you're not?"
"No. We're both good at what we do, there's no point in complicating it more than that."
"You're much more mature than I am Hol." Gail commented affectionately.
"You say that like you're surprised." Holly teased in return causing Gail to laugh softly. This was what she needed, she just needed to hear Holly's voice for a few minutes to take her away from having to deal with federal jack asses that liked to walk in as if they owned the place.
"Let's go out tonight. I want to take you on a date." Gail suggested suddenly. It wasn't that they didn't date, they went out to the Penny plenty now that Gail had gotten over her weird issue with sharing Holly's attention. But they were usually so tired after their shifts they didn't want to go anywhere so they ordered in. Movie and take-out nights were fast becoming Gail's favorite thing ever. However, Gail wanted to take her girlfriend out for a change.
"A date? What did you have in mind?"
"Dinner some place nice, conversation, maybe if you play your cards right some other things when we get home." Gail hinted in a low voice. Holly felt herself shiver just at the thought of it. Holly knew that once she and Gail crossed the physical intimacy line that things would change between them, and they had in some ways, but what Holly liked the most was it seemed to have cemented something for Gail and the blonde seemed to open up, allow herself to funny commit herself to their relationship. Holly wasn't sure if it was the fact that they'd made love, or the fact that they had both expressed their love. But if she were guessing she'd say it was both of them.
"I like this plan."
"Excellent. I'll see you after shift. You can teach me how two girls get ready for a date."
After her conversation with Gail all Holly wanted to do was pass the time faster. She wanted to go home and be able to go out with her girlfriend. Suddenly, it felt like it was the most pressing thing in the world. Otherwise she was just compiling evidence for Victoria when she arrived. When the door opened to the lab Holly didn't bother to look up, people came and went all during the day. It wasn't until she saw a feminine form come to stand next to her that she paused, her head slightly turned so she could get a better look. But to someone not paying attention it might have appeared that Holly was oblivious.
"Good Afternoon Dr. Stewart." Holly's fingers stilled on the keyboard at the familiar voice that carried through the room. It was familiar yet Holly remembered the last time she'd heard it there had been a stronger hint of an accent than there was now.
"Dr. Silas, about time you showed up." Holly replied spinning her chair so that she was facing the new comer. For a moment Holly was taken aback by how close Victoria was to her but she recovered from the shock.
"Traffic?"
"Glad to see some things never change, we can always rely on you to stroll in whenever it's convenient for you." Holly jibed, it might have seemed like Holly was being unfairly harsh but the slight curl of her lips indicated that her words were in jest.
"I'm glad someone appreciates it. How have you been?" Holly stood and accepted the friendly hug, it was brief and lasted only a moment before the women parted.
"I'm well, and you?"
"Other than this case I'm fine."
"Perhaps after work today you'll allow me to take you out for drinks and we can catch up."
"Sorry, I can't tonight I have plans. Rain check?"
"Keep the ladies wanting more hmm? Glad to know some things haven't changed." Victoria teased.
Victoria Silas was a beautiful woman, brilliant, beautiful, funny, with legs that went on forever. Her golden hair was pulled back into a functional and also elegant clip exposing her neck. Her green eyes peered at Holly with a mixture of fascination and playfulness. She was exactly the type of woman Holly would have fallen for, even found herself developing a crush on at one point in her life. But now when she looked at Victoria, the only admiration she felt was professional.
"Shall we start looking over the evidence?" Holly suggested gesturing to the empty chair next to her.
Agent Valmont and Greer were fast becoming the bane of Gail's existence, Valmont seemed to be the more dominant of the two being the one that spoke more. But Greer was the muscle, he stood silent and brooding and was kept, Gail was sure of it, for purely intimidating properties. Both alpha male types enjoyed the idea that they were there to help solve a serial killer case and liked treating the uniforms as servants who could go and get them coffee. Gail felt her anger spike to an almost critical level when she overheard Valmont trying to get Chloe to go get him coffee by calling her sweetheart. Gail was proud of the redhead for telling him she'd be happy to get him some coffee if he didn't mind having her saliva in it.
But Frank had asked them to be as accommodating as possible and Gail would not want to be on the receiving end of one of Elaine Peck's lectures on how they were supposed to be helping bridge the gap between interdepartmental rifts.
"This is stupid." Andy grumbled sitting next to Gail arranging the different copies of files she'd just had to make and stapling them all together. Gail chewed on the edge of her pen gently while watching as Traci and Luke were made to play nice with the Agents.
"So far I haven't seen how they can help us find this guy." Chris commented from across the desk.
"Resources, it's all about the resources. They got them and we need them." Dov answered running down names at his work station.
"Holly says they sent a forensic pathologist down to work with her too." Gail commented.
"Man, this is going to become just one giant federal mess."
"So I heard that Noelle's coming back from maternity leave beginning of next week." Chris commented hoping to brighten the mood of his friends. They had all wondered if Noelle was going to come back from her extended maternity leave. Noelle was a hard ass, but she was someone that they needed, someone that the Division hadn't realized they were taking for granted until she was gone.
"That'll help. She won't put up with this shit." Andy said in a low, conspiratorial voice. She didn't like the Agents being there but she didn't want them to know that either. Pissing off a federal agent was not the best move for her career.
"Oh God." Gail exclaimed quietly looking up and seeing the white shirt and the flash of red that could not be anyone other than her mother walking into the Division. She didn't know why she hadn't thought about it before, having Agent's coming in of course the Superintendent would be present to make sure everything went smoothly. However, that usually meant that Gail was about to be thrust into some form of spotlight or volunteered for a task she most definitely didn't want.
"Uh oh Superintendent Mom is on the prowl." Dov teased. Though his jabs had essentially lost their meaning he still made them because it was fun to see how riled up it got Gail.
"This is not something I want to deal with right now." Gail said turning her chair away in hopes that by some miracle her mother had more to pay attention to than her. But Gail was never that lucky, and it seemed that Elaine was at least a part of the reason that she had decided to drop by 15th.
"Gail, a word please." Elaine said without even breaking her stride towards Frank's office. Gail looked past her friends and each of them saw the tormented look that crossed over her face as she stood up to follow.
Once she had crossed the threshold of Frank's office the door closed firmly behind Gail. Frank looked up, like Gail he was not surprised that Elaine was there but the unorthodox manner in which she arrived seemed to surprise him too.
"Superintendent Peck, what can I do for you?" Frank asked folding his hands over his stomach as he reclined in his chair.
"A serial killer. A serial killer has murdered three people and I am just now hearing about it when I find out that federal agents are being sent in to help the investigation. Explanations now." Angry was definitely an understatement about Elaine's mood, Gail would guess that she was closer to livid. Elaine didn't like important things like this being kept form her in any case but to be caught unware when the request to intervene came through made Elaine look like a fool and there was no greater sin in the world.
"We didn't want to make a big deal out of this. It's already catching fire with the media and I thought that it best if we tried to keep this in house." Frank explained glancing at Gail. Neither of them had to ask what she was doing there. She was expected to have told Elaine about the serial killer. But she hadn't which put her at the top of Elaine's shit list. The reaming that Elaine was about give was for the both of them.
"A big deal? Staff Sergeant someone has killed multiple people in your district and you think that you have the luxury of keeping this discrete? I'm expected to make a press conference about this by the end of the day today. So you will catch me up on all of the details." Gail new that last part was aimed at her. She was going to have to catch her mother up on all the details of the case.
"Of course Superintendent." Frank said nodding towards Gail to lead Elaine to the parade room where all of the details of the case were being spread out. Gail didn't expect her mother to say anything to her while they walked. That was how Elaine handled her displeasure with her children, she didn't yell. At least not right away, the punishment came with the disapproving look that she had perfected. The feeling of knowing that she had let her mother down was enough of a punishment. And then the lecture would come.
"The first victim was-"Gail started without looking at her mother.
"How could you not tell me?" Elaine demanded once they were alone. Gail stopped, looking at her mother wide eyed, surprised by the sudden burst of anger that came from her mother.
"Frank said it, we were trying to keep this under wraps."
"You are my daughter. You are a Peck and you owed it to your family to tell me what was going on. Especially if you're Staff Sergeant isn't making decisions that are in the best interests of his Division." Elaine said as if Gail should have already known that.
"I don't think he was wrong. Sargent Best acted in the best interests of the public. He didn't want to create a panic by whispering the words serial killer. The media is already going to make this a huge deal, telling them what we know, or worse yet all that we don't know isn't going to help anyone." Gail insisted.
"You're first responsibility is to your family name Gail. I thought you would have known that by now." Elaine said with a disappointed sigh. Gail regarded her mother, for a moment trying to pretend like the words didn't sting. But showing that weakness would only spur Elaine on.
"You taught me that my division is like my family mother. And to follow the orders of my commanding officer as if they were orders from you." Gail fought back. It was clear that it surprised Elaine that Gail was standing up for herself. Gail usually remained quiet when it came to Elaine's attacks. She was raised to silently take the criticism, even if it was unwarranted because it was the fastest way to make them stop.
"Well I'm glad that you're at least attempting to listen to me. Even if your draw the wrong conclusions. Now, catch me up so that I can go and try and clean up this mess."
By the end of her shift Gail was ready to jump out of her skin. She had spent the majority of the day talking over the entire case with her mother. Explaining that they were doing everything that they could and that no effort was being spared in finding who the killer was and stopping him. But Gail was agitated, and barely able to contain her ire as she sat with her mother.
"This Dr. Stewart must be completely inept if this is all she could provide you with." Elaine commented looking over Holly's notes as she looked them over. Gail's jaw dropped slightly and she felt her blood threaten to boil over. Criticizing Gail was one thing, her Division was slightly more egregious but insulting Holly was something that Gail could not, would not allow.
"She has been working harder than any of us to find out who this killer is. There is no forensic evidence." Gail defended. Elaine looked up, removing her glasses in a meticulous fashion that drove Gail up the wall.
"When did you get your degree in forensics Gail?"
"That's not the point. Dr. Stewart is one of the best forensic pathologists in the country. She's the only reason we know what we know." Gail continued, she could hear the sound of blood rushing through her veins so loud that it blocked out almost anything else. Elaine was not allowed to do this to Holly. A woman whom she'd never met, but assumed was a failure at her job simply because a report didn't blatantly spell out who the murderer was.
"You are awfully defensive of Dr. Stewart." Elaine commented looking at her daughter closely. Gail didn't give her praise easily. If Gail was willing to defend Holly to Elaine of all people then there must be something special about the doctor.
"I just won't have you jumping to conclusions about her skill level just because the killer has at least some forensic knowhow." Hoping that she hadn't said too much that her mother might grow suspicious. She hadn't even thought about telling Elaine about Holly yet. She knew she would have to do it eventually, and it was an experience that Gail was not looking forward too. It wasn't that Elaine was in any way homophobic, but there were expectations and Gail was sure that her being in a relationship with a woman wasn't a part of that plan.
It was clear by the narrowing of Elaine's eyes that she didn't entirely believe that was the only reason her daughter was coming to such a vehement defense of the doctor. There had been whisperings delivered by her spies that Gail was seeing someone. Gail hadn't exactly been discrete about it. Putting two and two together wasn't difficult.
"How long have you been seeing her?" Elaine asked. Gail wished that she could have been surprised that her mother had figured it out. She thought for a brief moment of denying it but what would the point of that be?
"A few months." Gail answered truthfully watching her mother's reaction closely. She couldn't ever read her mother's expressions. It was too difficult to tell if the older woman was going to react favorably or indifferently. Gail didn't even want to think of the other possibilities.
"My daughters been a lesbian for a few months and I'm only now hearing it from her? Wow, not only am I apparently oblivious as a Superintendent but as a mother as well." Elaine said sitting down. Maybe it was just a sign that she didn't know her daughter as well as she thought she did because she honestly had not seen this coming.
"Kinda took me by surprise too. And I'm not a lesbian. It's just Holly." Gail answered softly, taking pity on her mother when she saw just the barest glimpse that this was truly bothering Elaine.
"Just Holly?"
"You know when you meet someone, and they just get you? And you just feel it, this is the person that you're supposed to be with forever?" Gail tried to explain though she wondered if her mother did know what that felt like. It wasn't that her parents had a loveless marriage, but since as far back as Gail could remember her parents had more of a partnership than a marriage.
"I do know that feeling."
"That's what Holly did to me. The fact that she is a woman just didn't matter."
"Would it be out of the realm of possibility to meet this woman?"
"Are you going to criticize her ability as a pathologist?" Gail asked.
"No. Maybe her worthiness to date my daughter but not in a professional capacity." Elaine said pulling her purse over her shoulder.
"Maybe once all this dies down. We're all really stressed out and I don't think that the stress will bode well for a successful dinner."
"Thank you for telling me Gail." Elaine said before she left the parade room not giving her daughter a chance to respond. Gail stood silent for a moment unable to move or even think for a minute while she processed what had just happened.
Aware that her phone was ringing some time later Gail jumped, looking at the offending device and seeing Holly's name crossing the screen Gail cursed silently for losing track of time.
"Hey." Gail greeted already packing the files up.
"You okay?" Holly asked picking up on the strange somberness of Gail's voice. Gail always had snark present in her tone but somber was usually indicative that something was wrong.
"Yeah, I'm fine. Just spent the day with my mother." Gail answered though even that wasn't the entire truth. While it normally would mean that Gail was angry enough to want to shoot something she decided this would go down in the history books as a pleasant encounter.
"Okay…" Holly didn't know how to answer that. She never understood Gail's relationship with her mother. Being almost estranged but at the same time not.
"I'm okay, really. It was just a lot more of her than I wanted to deal with today. Anyway, are you ready for me cuz I still need to change."
"That's okay, I'm just leaving the morgue now."
"See you in a bit."
The drive to Holly's mostly silent, but not in an uncomfortable Gail brooding kind of way. The two women just knew better than to start their night together with the heavy conversational stuff and decided to just allow themselves to process their days before asking the other how their own day had faired. It was one of the many things that Gail appreciated about Holly. She didn't find that it was necessary to fill silences with small talk.
"So what am I wearing tonight?" Holly asked as they crossed the threshold of her home. Gail looked at her quizzically for a moment wondering what that question meant. "How would you like me dressed? Are we going fancy-ish, casual?"
"Oh, um comfortable but nice?" Gail said with a hint of question.
"So nice jeans and a blouse kinda thing?" Holly asked and then nodded.
"Surprise me."
"Always do." Holly said before disappearing upstairs.
"You're telling me." Gail murmured to herself.
Holly emerged from the bedroom almost half an hour later and descended the stairs. Gail had sat herself on the couch and was aimlessly flipping through channels while she waited. She'd changed already and had used the downstairs bathroom to touch up her makeup and hair. But nothing prepared her for the sight of Holly. Holly was always beautiful, Gail was sure Holly would always be beautiful, even without make up first thing in the morning when she hadn't even made an attempt. But tonight she had, her glasses were gone and she'd put in her contacts, she wore a pair of blue jeans that hugged her hips and her butt perfectly before relaxing down her legs. The blouse she had decided on was a maroon color and showed a generous view of her cleavage.
"Wow. This is you casual?" Gail asked her mouth dry and her body reacting to the sight of her girlfriend. Holly blushed at the compliment and a warm smile touched her lips.
"You look beautiful." Holly said, but she said it like it was the most natural thing. Gail would never get used to the way that Holly looked at her. It would still always surprise her that Holly looked at her with such adoration, Gail had never experienced anything like it before.
The two gravitated towards one another and it seemed like such a natural thing for Gail to wrap her arms around Holly's waist and pull the brunette against her. Their lips meeting effortlessly and the familiar warm feeling filling both of them as they enjoyed the leisurely kiss. It broke at its inevitable end and Holly grabbed her bag and let Gail lead her out of the house.
Dinner was a small, intimate affair at a small restaurant Gail had discovered through the course of work. She'd helped the owners recover some stolen property and they had sworn that she would always be welcome there. As the two of them walked in Mark the owner came out to greet Gail with a hug. The gesture surprising both Gail and Holly but neither knew what to say in response.
"You're going to have to tell me the story behind that hug." Holly said once they had been seated. Gail laughed, it wasn't that big of a deal, at least she didn't think so. But she told Holly the story of how Mark and his wife had come into the station when she had been on desk duty and had claimed that their house had been robbed. Gail being Gail had been disinterested at first until Mark explained why everything that was stolen was important and Gail had gone out of her way to help them. Turned out their junkie son had stolen from them and pawned everything to support his impressive drug habit.
"What happened to their son?" Holly asked.
"That's the reason for the hug, I pulled some strings and got their son into rehab. I think he'll be six months sober in a few weeks." Gail sipped from her water shifting uncomfortably. She didn't like praise, that wasn't why she did the job. But people seemed to enjoy giving her praise.
Dinner carried on comfortably as it always did with them, conversation came naturally. Given their varying careers and their different interests there was never a shortage of things to talk about. Of course Holly had to be a little more discrete when talking about autopsies given that it wasn't exactly appropriate dinner conversation.
"Do you want to get married?" Gail asked suddenly causing Holly to nearly choke on her drink. The brunette's shocked expression would have been comical if it hadn't been for the fact that Gail was slightly worried about the answer.
"What?" Holly asked when she had finally regained her breath.
"Relax Hol, I'm not proposing or anything. I'm just curious, do you see yourself getting married one day. I mean it is legal and everything." Gail explained gathering now how her question could be mistaken as a proposal.
"I think I do. I wasn't one of those girls that dreamt of a wedding when I was a little girl but I think someday I want to get married. Be someone's wife." Holly chose the word 'someone' carefully. She didn't want to spook Gail.
"I was going get married at 22. I didn't do it out of love though. I did it to rebel against my parents. They hated Nick. But I think that being married might be nice, have someone to come home to every night, a life with someone. It sounds nice."
"You can have that even if you don't get married."
"Yeah but then they wouldn't be contractually bound to put up with my rather colorful personality traits." Gail replied mischievously. Holly couldn't help but laugh, Gail knew she could be a pain in the ass. And she didn't always mean to be. Of course there were times when she knew she was being a pain and did it anyway.
"They are definitely colorful."
"Can I ask you a question that you're not allowed to look too much into?" Gail asked leaning forward against the table and her voice dropping.
"I'll try not to look into it. But I can't promise anything." Holly offered honestly. Her mind was in a constant state of overdrive. She couldn't stop it. But at least she could promise that she wouldn't outwardly look to much into whatever it was Gail was about to ask.
"Could you ever see yourself marrying me?" Gail asked. She watched Holly's reaction, expecting a freak out or something. But Holly just sat back and pondered the question, the longer it took Holly to process the question the more worried Gail became. Maybe Holly was trying to think of a way that she could let Gail down easily. Maybe Holly was going to tell her that she wasn't in this for the long term. All of Gail's insecurities were preparing to rear their ugly heads and Gail had to keep herself from bolting.
"I could. One day." Holly answered finally.
"You hesitated." Gail countered defensively.
"I daydreamed. I imagined what it would be like to come home to you every day. To call you my wife, to be married to a police officer." The first part of Holly's statement was almost dreamy sounding but the last part of it was somber, and slightly fear filled. Holly was still coming to grips with the idea that she was dating a cop that things were going to happen to Gail that wouldn't happen if Gail had a normal career. She was going to be shot at, she was going to be hurt and every day there was a potential for danger. It was something Holly was still trying to reconcile in her brain.
"It's who I am Holly. I can't change it." Gail knew where Holly's mind went, and she knew that there was nothing that she could do that would make the look of sadness leave Holly's face forever but she had to try.
"I don't want you to ever change who you are. But that doesn't mean that I'm not going to worry."
"I think I could handle that. It's nice to have someone care about me and not just the fact that I'm a Peck. Oh speaking of which, I kind of told my mother about us today." Gail said taking a very large last bite of her meal before pushing the plate away. She was hoping if she distracted herself with eating she wouldn't have to deal with the aftermath of the bomb she'd just dropped on Holly.
"How do you 'kind of' tell your mother about us?"
"She came in guns blazing to the Division today. She thinks we aren't doing enough to catch this guy. And she was going over your report and she was saying some stuff. I defended you and she asked why I was so protective of you and poof it kind of just came out of my mouth." Gail explained in a rush. Holly didn't know whether or not she wanted to ask what Elaine had said about her or if she wanted to find out more about how Elaine had handled the news.
"How did she react?" Holly asked finally deciding that was the more important question.
"It's a lot for her. But I think that she's going to be okay once she can wrap her mind around it."
"I wasn't sure if you'd tell her about us or not."
"I told you I'm not ashamed."
"It's one thing to tell your friends. But another entirely to tell your parents." Holly remembered how torn up she'd been when she had first decided that she needed to tell her parents that she was gay. She'd made herself sick over it for days. Then when she couldn't handle it anymore she had sat them down and blurted it out in the most awkward and tactless way possible.
"I think that she might have already had a suspicion. But either way, she knows now. And I'm okay that she knows." Gail said reaching over and grabbing Holly's hand. Reassuring the brunette with just a touch that she was okay with everything that was happening with their relationship.
"You're really okay with all of this?" Holly asked. They hadn't ever really talked about it, not how Gail was processing all that was happening.
"I really am. I want to be with you Holly. And I'm not going to hide the fact that I'm with you just because some asshole is going to stare." There was such strength and conviction in Gail's voice that Holly had no choice but to believe it.
"I love you." The words were forced from Holly's mouth because in that moment she was beyond thought other than her overwhelming adoration and love for the woman now sitting opposite her. And she was rewarded by the brightest and most genuine smile Gail had.
"I love you."
They paid their bill and left the restaurant hand in hand, still enjoying pleasant conversation and the general warmth that was their happiness. With only the soft sounds of the radio playing some song or another Gail found the silence soothing and the security of Holly's hand in hers comforting.
"You look deep in thought." Gail commented when she noted that Holly had that look of deep focus she got when she was facing a problem that she couldn't see a solution for.
"What do you think about children?" Holly asked daring a glance at Gail briefly before she looked back to the road. Gail fell back against the seat she sat in and watched as Toronto sped pass.
"Not for me." Gail dismissed. Though even then the words felt like lies as she spoke them. It was only recently that Gail had begun to dream that she might one day become a mother. Holly felt Gail's words like a paralyzing blow. She had always wanted children, it wasn't so much a what if, but it was a when. And the more that she thought about it the more she had wanted children with Gail.
"Why not? You're great with children."
"I'm great with them if I can give them back at the end of the day and only have to deal with them for short periods of time."
"That's not true. Traci says you're great with Leo."
"Motherhood isn't for me. I'm fine being the cool aunt." Another lie. This one more convincing.
"That surprises me." Holly said as a final thought for the rest of the drive. This time however the silence was tense, filled with an uneasiness that had befallen the car. They didn't speak even as Holly parked and they made their way into her town home. Gail watched, wondering where the night had gone wrong as Holly went about her usual routine when she got home. Dropping her keys into the dish next to the door, hanging up her coat and then heading upstairs to change. Gail could tell Holly was bothered by something and it revolved around having children. But now she was torn on whether or not she should follow Holly and confront the issue or remain where she was and wait for Holly to come down to her.
Minutes passed like hours as Gail stood in the entryway of Holly's home. Looking around feeling as if she didn't belong anymore though she couldn't justify the feeling. It made her uneasy but she couldn't bring herself to move. Holly hadn't returned from the upstairs and almost twenty minutes had passed. It never took Holly that long to change into comfortable clothes so Gail figured that Holly was remaining upstairs.
She ascended each step cautiously until she was at the top of the stairs and looking down the dark hallway towards Holly's bedroom. The thin sliver of light showing from beneath the door told Gail that Holly was inside. In all the time that they had spent together in Holly's house Gail had never knocked on the bedroom door. She'd always felt welcome whether the door was open or not. But now she knocked, likely because she didn't know if Holly was angry or not.
"Come in." Holly's voice was muffled through the door but Gail pushed the door open anyway and peaked inside. Holly was sitting on her bed, legs crossed under her TV remote in hand but the device wasn't on.
"You're mad about something."
"I'm not mad Gail. I'm just thinking." Holly answered as Gail ventured towards the bed.
"About what?"
"I want kids Gail."
"Oh." Gail breathed sitting on the corner of the bed and looking at Holly while the brunette looked away.
"Yeah oh."
"And I told you that I didn't want to have kids." Gail was putting the pieces together and she wasn't liking the sinking feeling that was beginning to settle into her stomach.
"It's just something that I've always saw for myself. And I get that we're still newly into this relationship and I don't want to push for anything. But if we both want different things in our lives, it just makes me worry us."
"No, babe don't worry about us. We're solid right? I mean we're good together right?"
"We're great together Gail. That isn't what this is about. This is about the future. I want to have kids one day Gail." Holly pressed. She didn't want to convince Gail how she was wrong for not wanting children or that there was anything wrong with that. But it was what Holly wanted and Holly needed Gail to understand that wasn't going to change.
"I don't know what to say Holly." Gail said quietly looking at Holly, her eyes showing every bit of fear and vulnerability she was feeling. She didn't like the feeling that this conversation might lead to the two of them breaking up. Gail didn't know if she could live without Holly. Holly had woven herself so inextricably with Gail's life that removing her would be impossible.
Silence fell over the room and neither woman knew what to say. This was the first time that they had reached something in their lives that they disagreed on. And unfortunately it couldn't have been something simple that could easily be resolved. Holly wanted to have kids, and honestly there was no greater mental image for Gail then doing just that. Her and Holly raising a child together and going to the park, Christmases, Gail had no doubt in her mind that Holly would make a remarkable mother. But she couldn't do it. Gail knew she couldn't subject a child to being raised like that.
Gail shifted closer to Holly so that their knees were touching as they faced each other but the brunette didn't look up. Holly didn't shy away from eye contact, not usually but that's what worried Gail. Holly refused to meet her gaze which in Gail's past experience had never been a good thing.
"Why don't you want kids?" Holly asked finally, it took her a moment to find her voice and even as she spoke it was through the lump that was forming in her throat.
"It's not that I don't Holly. It's that I can't." Gail offered softly. Holly's eyes shot up, concern and confusion marring her beautiful face.
"What do you mean? Like you can't have children? Medically?" Holly asked wondering why Gail had never mentioned anything before. It wasn't that they spent hours on end going over their past medical histories but it was usually something that came up in conversation.
"No, I think biologically I'm all good to go for children. I just can't. Like I can't let myself have kids." Gail said knowing that probably didn't help alleviate any of Holly's concern.
"Why not?"
"Because of the job Holly. It's risky and there is a more than probable chance that I could get hurt or killed in the line of duty one day. I don't want to do that to a child. I saw what happened to Leo when Jerry died. How hard it was for Traci to deal with him being gone and having Leo ask why Jerry wasn't coming home. I can't do that to a kid Holly, or to you. So I just decided that kids aren't going to be for me." Gail offered hoping that Holly might understand her point of view.
"Nothing in life is certain Gail. That doesn't mean that we should stop going after the things that we want just because we don't know what's going to happen tomorrow."
"Maybe, but I can decide this. I know that I don't want to have to subject a child to losing a parent."
"But you'd subject me to losing you?" Holly snapped. She hated how easily Gail was talking about it. How easy it seemed for Gail to talk about her own possible death as if it were a certainty.
"That's different."
"How? How is that different? You think that it would be easy for me to have Oliver or Traci come to the door and tell me that something happened to you? You think that is something that I could be able to cope with?" Holly demanded getting off the bed and walking across the room. She needed some distance from Gail, she needed to have the room stop feeling like it was closing in on her.
"Whoa, that's not what I meant."
"Then what did you mean Gail? You won't have kids because you don't want to abandon them if you get killed on the job. But you're okay with the idea that you'd be leaving me? I thought the whole point of you strapping that vest to your uniform was to make sure that you did come home every night."
"Why are you getting so mad Holly? You knew who I was when we started this, you knew that it was a risk."
"A risk sure, a risk I could handle. I didn't think that this was something that you were actually planning for."
"Of course I plan for it Holly. I know that it could happen."
"Sure, it could happen. But so could me getting hit by a car tomorrow, so could a million different freak accidents that could kill me."
"Don't say that!" Gail yelled standing up. She didn't want to think that something might happen to Holly. It was hard enough to force herself to let Holly get out of bed every morning.
"It's the same thing Gail."
"No it's not."
"If you're going to keep your life at a standstill because you're afraid of what might happen then I don't know what it is that we're doing. Clearly we won't have a future if you keep envisioning yourself getting killed."
"What are you saying?" Gail asked both anger and hurt flooding through her system.
"I don't know. I just, need some time to think. I think you should go."
It took a moment for the words to sink in for Gail. It was the first time since she had unofficially moved into Holly's house that the brunette had asked her to leave. She stood, gawking at Holly trying to get her body to move but it refused. Finally it was Holly who moved first walking first to the bedroom door and opening it for Gail and then going to the bathroom and closing the door behind her. She didn't want to watch Gail leave. A huge part of her was still confused as to why she was asking Gail to leave. But she needed to think, she wanted to be with Gail more than anything. She was happiest when she was with Gail. But that didn't take away the want she had to have children, and she didn't want to sacrifice that dream to be with Gail and wind up resenting the blonde. And likewise, she didn't want Gail to be pressured into having children with her if that wasn't truly what she wanted. Either way, they both had some thinking to do if they both still wanted to have a future together.
The first tear fell when Holly heard the bedroom door shut, and moments later the front door slamming shut as Gail left.
Thoughts?