Cherita Chen:

The door slams open and I flinch at the sound but out comes a quick and apologetic, "Oh, shit! Sorry…sorry."

My eyes turn through the stalls to look at who could have spoken but I realize quickly I don't have X-ray vision and I can't see a thing. I lower my eyes once again and find my finger tracing over the wet spot that he left behind. A part of me wants to go searching for him to demand he tell what the tears mean but I know I don't have the courage. I would stay here in the bathroom if I didn't leave my lunch in my locker and I didn't miss lunch.

I begin to stand upright to leave but suddenly the gentle, nervous voice breaks the air, "Hey, crap, I'm sorry but can you pass me some tissue? It's starting to look like this day is getting worse and worse."

I can't help but to smile briefly as I pull out a few lengths of tissue and rip it off to make the pass underneath the stall. A slender hand reaches under to take it from me and I nod briefly at her thanks. I step out of the stall and drop my books onto the corner of the sink as I reach forward to absentmindedly wash my hands. My eyes glance up at the mirror to see my own face but I turn away quickly. I don't want to look at myself anymore.

The stall opens behind me and I instantly catch sight of the beautiful girl that walks out behind me. Her name is Gretchen, I know that because she's the new girl and today is her first day. She begins to smile at me but I look down again. I don't want to see the pity look that will eventually come. Most girl's are kind enough to keep their comments to themselves but they can't hide the look. No one can hide the look.

"Hey…um…thank you. For that. In my own school no one does that. We had to bring our own toilet paper to school. There were major cutbacks," she begins to talk and I'm at a loss for words as I gaze at her…totally absent of the look.

I don't know what to say.

"My name's Gretchen…by the way," her hands are clean but I'm still nervous when she extends hers to me.

"Cherita…," I respond, slowly taking it and shaking it.

"It's nice to meet you," she smiles and I nod nervously in return. I don't know why she's being so nice but I know it will stop. It always does. They're always nice to me until they make a new group of friends and then I'm their biggest target. Anything they can do to distance themselves from me by any means necessary. "You know, it's really hard to make friends here. This place…everyone is such a bitch."

"I know. Most of the kids that go here have parents that work here too, so even if you wanted to make a response there's no way anyone will do anything."

The words come out of my mouth before I have time to respond, "I can tell. I already know that Ms. Farmer monster and her little she-devil Joanie are related but God, can they get any worse? Sparkle Motion? What the fuck is up with that?"

I can't help but to laugh as I glance downward with a slight frown, "Yeah…it's pretty awful. The talent show is coming up and they practice nonstop. I'm sure they're doing it right now."

"God, how awful?" she smiled before a knock on the door suddenly disturbed our conversation and a male voice called her name. She blushed lightly as she glanced down, "That's for me. It was nice meeting you Cherita."

I nodded back, "It was nice meeting you too, Gretchen."

I spent the rest of the period getting my lunch and trying to avoid him but it seemed everywhere I went he just kept popping up. I held onto my textbook beneath my arm, feeling it vibrating like a heart in my hold. I took in a deep breath and decided to go through the courtyard instead to find as I had imagined Sparkle Motion in the middle of practice. I made sure to walk past quickly until a strong wind made my hair whip around my face and when I finally got it out of the way there was Joanie before me.

"I don't know what you're weird obsession with Donnie Darko is but you need to get real. Look at you and look at him. It's never going to happen and I hear he's looking for you to tell you so. Okay? So get real!"

She slammed my books down and I let out a sudden shout as she caught sight of the textbook on the floor with his name on it. She gasped and grabbed the book, ripping it off and throwing it behind her in the wind. I shut my eyes and waited for her to leave but instead came the laughs as I lower myself and pick up all the things she had dropped. I watched the paper bag floating away and through the field but turned away and rushed backward into the school. She was right. Look at me. She was right.