"Crikey, look wha' we 'ave 'ere! Right in front of us we see the Sorasaurus in his natural habitat, the common bed. These creatures can be found spending 12-16 hours a day sleeping 'ere. The furniture is an essential part of their ecosystem as they sometimes even eat or spend their free time 'ere. On rare occasion when they need to… Oh bugger all, the beast spotted me!"
The 'beast' promptly outstretched his hand and grabbed the Sorasaurus Dundee by the collar.
"As you can see, these animals are extremely dangerous. One needs to exercise extreme caution when disturbing them, as…" Eager to interrupt the documentary, I slapped a hand over the Aussie's mouth.
"Riku, would you kindly shut the fuck up for a second. Do you know about what happened to me? I remember I was tossing my phone down into the sea, and then there was a voice behind me. Everything after that is a blank! Blech! What the hell! Did you just lick my hand?" I reeled my hand away from my older brother.
Riku dusted the imaginary dirt off his trousers. "Bruh. Calm down, I'll answer all your questions. And yes I licked your hand, you know how I don't like being touched. But first, let's get out of here. I hate hospitals,"
I crossed my arms with the utmost amount of anger humanly possible. "Try staying in one for almost two months like I just did. I don't understand why I was kept here so long, I was fine and healthy… I don't know… almost two months ago!" I shouted, arms flailing now.
"Dude, seriously, you're giving me an ulcer just looking at you. Take a chill pill and come with me, I know I've got some explaining to do. Actually, before that, I brought you some street clothes. Hospital gowns aren't very stylish and I can't be seen with you in those," Riku winked. The nerve of this asshole, I swear. Fine, I'm playing along too.
"Fine… just as I started taking a liking to these things too. I hardly have to unzip or de-pants myself when I need to go to the bathroom, they're pretty convenient!" Riku laughed and threw my clothes on the bed in response.
"Alrighty, get dressed and I'll meet you outside the room. We've got a big day ahead of us," the silverette commanded, and strode out the door.
"Tch. What a drama queen."
This Starbucks wasn't unlike any other Starbucks. Minimalist modern architecture with walls covered with forgettable coffee-colored quotes and designs. You got your Apple hipsters, white girls gossiping, and the grumpy old people in the corner. Yes, everything was just normal. Besides the guy in the fire hydrant suit.
"Has this really become your default 'Riku in hiding' disguise?" I drawled with a bored tone.
"And what if it has?" he defended. "It's comfortable and functional. The only drawback is the dogs that occasionally try to do their business," the idiot sniffed.
I smirked and rested my arms on the table. "Whatever, forget I asked. Let's get down to business." Riku's smile vanished. "First of all, why the hell was I trapped in that hospital for two months? When I asked the staff about being discharged, they told me I was being detained."
Brother took a long sip of coffee before answering. "Bottom line, you were on a hit list of sorts."
"Let me guess, this has almost nothing to do with me and is entirely because of you, right?" I groaned. Any sane person would have been shocked, but threats and violence have been commonplace around Riku. For a model/designer, he's very public about his… out of the norm beliefs. There are many people who commend him for his openness, but the downside is the enemies he created in the process.
"Unfortunately, yes. I'm sorry I got you mixed up in this. You know your big bro, always getting into trouble!" I rolled my eyes.
"Jesus, you sound like you came straight out of a terrible family sitcom. Alright, fill me in. What's the situation? Fanatics? Christians? Fangirls?" I rapid-fired.
"No, no, and sort-of. My sources believe it was an opposing model agency, The Heartbreakers." My face contorted in confusion.
"Heartbreakers? Never heard of em. They sound like a real sweethearts," I replied, sarcasm dripping from my pores.
"You could say that. They sure look it, I mean some of these chicks… wow…." Riku gushed with a disgusting expression on his face. I cleared my throat loudly and he broke from his reverie. "Erm, like I was saying, they don't exactly agree with my practices. They meant to capture you that night," he explained.
"Why would they capture me? What would that solve?" I questioned. Riku simply shrugged.
"I have no idea. Whether they were going to attempt to make demands or trade for some ransom money, it doesn't matter. Luckily Brutus was on guard when you were attacked, and he stopped the perpetrator from hurting you any further. Whoever attacked you unfortunately got away, but luckily left behind a clue as to who they were."
"You have your personal bodyguards watch over me? What the hell man! I mean I guess I appreciate it, but a warning would've been nice. What if I was doing something personal?" My face gets red, thinking of a reoccurring activity of mine involving a cave and some chalk.
"Hey, it saved your life didn't it? And yes I know about the cave drawings you fucking two year-old." My head hit the table. "Anyways, I needed to keep you somewhere safe for the time being since the attacker was still at large, so the hospital was perfect."
"Okay, I understand. I would've preferred somewhere that didn't reek of death and tomato soup but I guess it was your call," I deadpanned. "So, how did you know the attacker was associated with The Heartbreakers?"
"Ah, that's the best part! When Brutus ripped the perpetrator off of you, he ripped off a piece of clothing with it. After careful examination, I figured out that it was of Heartbreaker design!" Riku happily explained. I patiently waited for the rest. There… is more evidence, right?
"Is that it? You're claiming they're associated because the attacker was wearing their clothes?" I asked for confirmation. Riku simply nodded. I sighed deeply.
"So in other words, we have no idea who's responsible. Alright, I've heard enough. Let's get out of this dump. All this narration is exhausting and I want to sleep in my proper bed," I moaned.
"Ha. Of course you do. Sounds good to me, this suit is getting kinda sweaty anyways…" The hydrant reached into his suit and dialed a number. "Brutus! Hey! Bring the car around, would you buddy?" A series of grunts later and Riku stands up. "Alright, let's go. Brutus is right around the corner."
"About damn time," I grumbled as I tucked in my chair. We walked outside into the desolate street just as our Rolls Royce pulls up. Brutus rolled down the window, motioning for us to get in with a strained look on his face.
"Et tu, brut? You're not going to open the door for us today? Tisk, tisk. I thought you were more gentlemanly than that," Riku sassed sarcastically as he grabbed shotgun. I hopped in the back, shutting the door behind me.
A 9mm pistol was cocked to my left. "Nice to see you again, weakass. Brutus. Drive."
AN: Whoooooooooah this fic went 0 to 100 real quick! Hello again. Sorry it's been so long, I've been on vacation in Florida. The two months in the hospital thing in the story was going to be a third-wall breaker as a reference to the two months I haven't updated, but I scratched it when I couldn't fit it in. I'm kinda making this story up as I go along so bear with me on this one hehe. It's gonna be a bumpy ride!
As always, please favorite or at least review. I love reading the feedback.