Some people were curious about how Lucas had the Comet- Remember first chapter, Lucas had driven Peyton to the airport in the Comet? She left it in Tree Hill with him because she had plans to come back. Lucas asked Larry if he could keep it when Larry tried to sell it off, and he agreed (this was right after the funeral), so now its his.

My muse is just going ahead full steam! You can thank men who don't call for this chapter. Since I wasn't on the phone, I had to do something to occupy my time. And there's nothing like escaping into fantasy world when real life stinks. So enjoy!

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Chapter 4 The Past Revisited

Summer, a year and a half later.

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"Honeygrove, Texas" Lucas said quietly as they drove into town, crossing the city lines. "Man, it's been 4 years since I've been here, and it still looks the same."

Lindsay looked around excitedly, taking in the quaint buildings and friendly people. "Oh look! That man just waved to someone else. Isn't that wonderful?"

Lucas frowned, confused. "Linds, it's a small town. That's what people do."

Lindsay laughed. "Ok, maybe so. But coming from New York, seeing that is about as rare as meeting someone who still owns an 8 track."

Even Lucas had to smile at her enthusiasm, though he was feeling anything but. He was feeling…he didn't know what he was feeling, but it wasn't pleasant.

They were on the last leg of his second novel's first book tour, and he'd had mixed emotions the entire time. He was over the moon about his second novel's success, at 22 reaching a level that most people couldn't in their entire lifetime, but he was unhappy about why it had done so well. Everyone believed that it was another love story, a novel about yearning and lost love; a novel about Peyton Sawyer. No one believed him when he tried to explain that he no longer held hope Peyton would return to him- it was just a story about a scientist and a comet.

It was Lindsay who had the brilliant idea to bridge the first and second novel by having the book tour stop in some of the places that were significant in the first novel, hence the stop in Honey Grove, Texas. Lucas had the feeling that she just wanted to test just how strong a hold memories of Peyton still had on him.

Once a conversation topic that bonded them, his history with Peyton was now a source of strife for them. Lindsay felt that he was still holding onto a memory, and she couldn't compete with the perfection that was Peyton, immortalized in death. No one else would get Lucas to the man he could have become. No one else could bring the light back into his eyes. Noone but his precious Peyton, who wasn't coming back. And even though Lucas' friends and family accepted her, occasionally she would catch the worried glances and looks of concern they shared among each other at her presence in his life.

After reading the Comet, she was beginning to wonder if the worry was for him- or for her.

They pulled up to the only hotel in town, which was actually more of a motel, checking in and putting their things away, as Lindsay pulled out the itinerary.

"So far, your new book's done really well in the markets. It was definitely a good call to keep up doing the 3 cities in New Mexico." She smiled softly at him, recognizing that it was still a sore topic for him. He had fought adamantly against going back to the state that had stolen his dreams, especially once he had given up the search for Peyton a year and half ago.

"I know, I know. You were right. The market loved 'The Comet,' and they are loving the idea of including the towns that were mentioned in the first book." Lucas conceded. "Even though they still say that its because I am still looking for Peyton. It doesnt matter how many times I state publicly that I agree with her father, that she's d—gone."

Two years later and he still could not say the words out loud. Lindsay tried to ignore the shaft of pain that sliced through her at his poorly hidden inability to accept that fact. She consoled herself by remembering that he was with her now, even as the masochist in her couldn't help but blurt out, "Well, you did name the book the comet, and everyone knows that was the name of the car Peyton drove. I mean, come on, Luke, the 'comet' comes into the 'scientists' life and changes it, then leaves, and he spends the rest of his life waiting for it to return, so that the beauty and meaning in life can return to him as well? Can you blame them for what they think?"

Lucas stared at her. "What you mean is, can I blame you for what you think?"

She hung her head. Lucas walked over to her and lifted her head up with a finger on her chin. "How many times do I have to tell you- it's a piece of fiction. I love you. I'm with you. Why are you worrying about a memory? My first book is my past. You're my present." They both ignored the fact that he didn't say 'his future.' After all, avoidance had worked so well to keep their relationship together so far, there was no need to rock the boat.

"Now," Lucas said, smirking as his moved his hands to her hips and began to walk her back toward the bed. "How about you show me how much you appreciate me letting you talk me into showing you Honey Grove and Charleston?"

Lindsay's breath caught in her throat. Everytime she wondered if she were fooling herself in this relationship, Lucas would pull out a move like this to remind her why she stayed. "You- you haven't shown me Honeygrove, and we haven't gotten to Charleston yet." She said breathlessly.

Lucas lowered her onto the bed and covered her mouth with his. "Consider it payment in advance."

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Lucas sat upright in bed, chest heaving from the shock of waking up so forcefully. He looked over at Lindsay, who was breathing softly beside him, sleeping peacefully. Quietly he eased his way out of bed, making his way to the door and opening it gently, tiptoeing out of the room and onto the balcony that ran the length of the motel.

Lindsay had wanted the same room he stayed in the last time he was in Honey Grove, and he agreed to the suggestion- only if it were available. They both knew she wanted to make sure Peyton's ghost was truly exorcised, having him relive and revisit what was such a special place for them. And she didn't even know how special it was- some memories Lucas kept private, not willing to share them with the world, and the first time he and Peyton had come together as lovers was one of those memories.

What she also didn't know was how much he paid the motel attendant to say regretfully that the room she wanted was booked. He would not betray Peyton's memory by bringing his new girlfriend to a place that held witness to such a powerful and defining moment between them. Lucas didn't believe that was an indication that he still held onto Peyton in his heart- it was just a respect thing.

He lied to himself often these days.

In fact, just being in Honey Grove with Lindsay felt like a betrayal to Peyton. In his dreams, dreams that had begun once the book tour began, Peyton looked at him accusingly, tears in her eyes, as she asked him why he had given up on her.

Why he hadn't come to save her.

And tonight, the dream was even worse than the others. Tonight, the dream was particularly vicious- because it was a dream that sparked hope back into his heart. And for him, that was the cruelest dream of all.

In this dream Peyton was glowing-not crying, not frowning- her curls grown out down her back, the weight of her hair pulling her tight curls into loose waves that glinted in the sun. She was playing on a plot of grass, romping with a little girl that had the curls he once remembered her having, her blue eyes shining brightly as she caught a glimpse of him watching them. "Daddy! He's here!" the little girl cried as she ran to him. Behind her, Peyton smiled as she called out, "We've been waiting a long time, but we never gave up hope. I knew you would find us!"

He could still feel the warmth on his leg from the little girl twining her arms about it, and his lips still tingled from Peyton's kiss, her body pressed against his. He had bolted awake before the dream could progress, and at the present moment he didn't know if he were happy or sad that it hadn't continued on, because he held the feeling that by waking up so soon, he had missed something vital.

That was the future he was supposed to have, and the fact that it was no longer his made what should have been a beautiful dream a horrible nightmare. Never again would he complain about dreaming of Peyton's tears- it hurt less to see her cry for what was than to see what could have been and not have it. Because when Peyton cried in his dreams, she was only doing what he wished he could do in real life.

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The morning of the book signing dawn bright and sunny, a beautiful, sunny day that made Lucas wish the signing would be held outdoors. Since the event was scheduled for the afternoon, the morning was filled with sightseeing- the police station where they rescued Mouth, the thrift store where they brought their outfits for prom, the school where the prom was held, even the little sign that spoke to Mouth and told Haley about the prom, was considered a memorable landmark. She gushed over the gazebo where Nathan and Haley had their romantic moments, and Brooke and Peyton had their re-reconciliation. And finally, at lunch time, she dragged him to the diner where they all ate dinner together, after finding Mouth but before prom.

"This has been such a great day Lucas." Lindsay said, grabbing his hand as they sat in the booth. "I mean, I read the book and edited it, but it has never been more real to me than now, seeing the places in real time- smelling the same air you smelled then, seeing the same sights you saw. It's like I was here with you."

Lucas grunted noncommittally as he perused the menu.

"Hey, you should order the same thing you ordered that day, and we'll get it doubled so I can share it with you." She leaned in, eyes bright with excitement from the idea. "That was a tidbit that wasn't in the book. Do you remember what you ordered?" she said eagerly.

Of course he remembered. He remembered sitting in the corner booth, he and Peyton scrunched so tight she was practically sitting on his lap. He remembered her joking that all the diner needed was the waiters to have rollerskates on, to be back in the 50's. So, in keeping with that theme, they ordered burgers and fries, dipping the fries in ketchup and feeding them to each other and sharing a burger. In a southern drawl, Peyton confessed coyly that she had always wanted to share a beverage like they did in the movies, so Lucas ordered one, well worth the 4 dollars to see the look on Peyton's face when the waiter brought out a milkshake, complete with 2 straws. The kiss she laid on his lips in gratitude wasn't bad either. They sat there, ignoring the teasing from their friends as they drank the milkshake together, grinning and staring into each other's eyes. The moment was only enhanced by Haley reaching over and dunking a fry into their milkshake, breaking the romantic moment, but creating a great friendship memory, as the milkshake was then shared by all 7 of them, dunking French fries into the frosty concoction and laughing like lunatics.

"No, sorry." Lucas said, shrugging his shoulders. "It was probably the turkey sandwich, like I usually get."

"You do love your turkey." Lindsay agreed. "Well, then, that's what we'll order."

Lucas excused himself as Lindsay began to tell the waiter what they wanted, making his way around the bend to where the bathrooms were located. Needing to get away from the memories, from the realization that that was one of the last times they all laughed like that- inhibited and free, loving the world, loving life. Loving each other.

It was the memories he also blamed as the reason an incredulous, "Peyton?", slipped out of his mouth as he caught sight of blond curls turning the corner and entering into a door that said 'Employees Only. It was only because he had just seen her in his head that she appeared in front of him- he had learned long ago that a blond head did not a Peyton make. He had been burned many times before, chasing after a blond head of curls, only for the face to be that of a stranger.

He cursed himself as he lost the battle to continue to the bathroom, hurrying through the employee door after her. It led to a back exit that led to a parking lot connected to a side street. As he exited the building, he saw the blond head bobbing as she walked down the street, turning onto main street and getting swallowed up by the crowd that was cruising the sidewalks on such a beautiful day.

He was successful at suppressing the urge to follow her, past experience making him realize that it wasn't worth it to face Lindsay's disappointment that he was once again chasing ghosts, especially when he knew the ending to that scenario. He had called her name in the restaurant, and she didn't turn around, so odds were very good that she wasn't the one he was looking for. But he couldn't help making sure by asking the woman who was leaning against the wall taking a smoke break who the girl that just left was.

"Who, Bonnie?" She asked, looking in the direction of the blond haired woman. "She works here. She left to go pick up her kids from the babysitters." She leaned in conspiratorially. "She's taking them to the bookstore for that book signing. You know, the one for Lucas Scott's new novel? That's the guy who tours the country, writing books about his lost love and looking for her everywhere he goes..." Her eyes widened as she glanced at Lucas, then back toward the street. "Hey, wait a min-" she said.

But by the time she turned around to confirm her suspicions, he had already disappeared back into the diner.

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So….what do you think? Predictions? Foreshadowing? How many people still want to know if Peyton's really dead or not? Its been 4 years. Still holding out hope?

How many of you are tired of the suspense?

The next chapter is written and ready to go, so as soon as I get 20 reviews, I will post it. My muse is on a roll!