Chapter 24 – One night stand

Emma got out of the ladies room, wincing and taking a step back when her face slammed against someone's chest.

"Don't leave with him" A too familiar voice said as she raised her gaze to see Killian standing in front of her.

Unaware he had even been at the bar, his presence took her by complete surprise and yet she was quick to reply "Why do you care? I thought you were done with me" She said dryly when she tried to walk past him, his hand reaching to lean against the wall, stopping her from doing so.

He gazed down at her, waiting patiently for her to avert her gaze back to him. They locked eyes, the confusion distinct in hers as he ignored her question and just repeated "Don't leave with him"

"Why not?" She asked a bit annoyed, crossing her arms across her chest as her lips formed a tight line.

"Cause he's a pathological liar, and he'd only wind up breaking your heart"

Look who was talking. He didn't seem to care about her heart a month ago when he had her banished out of his life.

"You just don't like the guy"

"Guilty" He said with a hand over his heart as he shrugged "I don't like him, but that doesn't make him any less of a liar. Besides, August does not do relationships" He added thinking and dreading that Emma could definitely be the one to change August's mind about that.

"Well that's fine by me, since I'm not looking for one"

Why on earth was she talking about that with him?

"Then what are you looking for Swan?" He asked, raising his brow intrigued.

"Not something that you'd understand"

"Try me" He challenged, directing his gaze to her.

She looked at him, studying him, contemplating her words, noticing the anticipation for her response in his eyes, and she wondered why he was so interested all of a sudden.

"Casual sex" She finally blurted out, deciding to go with truth.

"You're right, I don't understand" He said, his voice going down a notch "Maybe that's because there's nothing casual about you"

What the…? Was he trying to sweet-talk her?

She assumed he was simply mocking her, unable to believe that his sudden found interest in her was true.

"You know what I mean, meaningless sex"

"Yeah…you…meaningless…don't see it" His mouth and hands said theatrically, gaining an eye-roll from her as she turned to leave "Wait" He grabbed her by the arm and she turned around, her eyes widening, looking at his hand on her arm in surprise, before she looked up at him "I'll do it"

"Do what?" She asked confused.

"Sex"

"With..me..?" She half stated – half asked, looking at him in disbelief and confusion as she watched him nodding slowly in reply "And who said I was offering?" She crossed her arms across her chest again.

Who was she kidding? Of course she was offering. If he was willing to take, she was willing to offer.

"If you're not offering then I am" He said as he took a step closer, invading her space, his face hovering over hers, the proximity making her swallow hard, his hot breath on her ear sending shivers down her spine as he whispered "Why would you want to explore an unknown land when you can have your pleasure guaranteed?"

He had a really good point right there, being the best sex she had ever had. But wait. What was going on with him? Last time she checked he had a girlfriend.

"And wouldn't your girlfriend mind?" She asked, her question sending him one week back to the conversation he had had with Belle…

…

It had been after three sexless weeks with Belle that they had finally had the talk. There hadn't been a doubt in his heart that he was still in love with Emma, and that he'd probably always will. He didn't want to be in love with the one who left him broken and bleeding, but he couldn't help it, the feelings were just too deep to grasp and too strong to ignore. It had been hard for him to admit that to Belle, he didn't want to hurt her, and he didn't want her to think that he didn't love her.

At first the conversation had been charged with heavy emotions, both of them had cried, both of them had wanted to make it work, both of them had known that it wouldn't.

After a couple of days Belle admitted that she was too still in love with someone else, an older guy, whom she had secretly loved for years, whom she had known her parents would never approve of.

Killian encouraged her to follow her heart, and she returned a favor and encouraged him to do the same. It was a bitter-sweet goodbye, they loved each other, they had shared a lot of beautiful moments in the time that they had spent together, and above all, they were really good friends, so it was hard to let that go. They did promise to stay in touch, but both of them knew that they had already turned a page as they were about to write the next chapter of their life, separately.

…

"We parted ways" Killian replied simply, remembering that only two days had passed since Belle had left his apartment.

"I'm sorry"

"No you're not" He replied in conviction and her eyes widened as she blinked heavily, slightly offended.

"You might find it hard to believe but I am" She said honestly "She seemed really nice and – "

"Are we going to keep standing here and talk about my ex?" He cut her off as he leaned one hand against the wall behind her, the other hand running down her bare arm, goose bumps prickling her skin as she raised her gaze, her eyes flickering from his mouth to his eyes when he whispered "Or are we going to ditch this place in favor of some more enjoyable activities?" He gestured with his head towards the exit of the bar.

She swallowed hard, her mind filling with thoughts of his naked body on top of hers, thoughts of him touching her in all the right places, their shared sex scenes flashing in front of her eyes, how good her body felt pressed against his, how he had made her come again and again, and she couldn't help her tongue from darting out to lick her lips.

"I'll meet you outside in five" She said in a tight voice, directing her gaze to him as he watched her green eyes growing darker in front of his eyes.

"Great" He grinned in triumph and quirked an eyebrow before he pushed himself off the wall and turned to leave the bar.

She glanced at him, watching him exiting the bar before she leaned back against the wall, the back of her head hitting the wall with a thump.

What did she just get herself into?

…

She turned the key inside the lock, opening her apartment door with Killian right behind her, his hands roaming around her waist as she smiled coyly. She stepped in, turning on the light, setting her keys and purse on the kitchen counter when he pulled her to him, his back leaning against the closed door, his hands reaching to cradle her neck, his eyes fixed on her lips, and before he managed to dive in for a kiss she lowered her gaze and began fumbling with his belt.

Sex. It was just sex. She couldn't possibly let herself fall under the spell of his intoxicating mouth. She couldn't possibly let herself believe that there was something more to it than just sex. For all she knew he was just using her to take his mind off his girlfriend.

She was quick to unbutton his jeans and when she was halfway down to her knees he pulled her up and turned them around, pressing her against the door "I once told you there's no need for that" He said huskily when they locked eyes "Have you seen how the entire bar stood still when you walked in?" He said on a soft smile, reaching his hand to her cheek "That's how beautiful you are" Her eyes studied him for a brief moment before she leaned to kiss his neck, avoiding his lips once again.

Oh fuck. She was so screwed, even his scent had a lethal effect on her, making her feel dizzy and lightheaded that she almost missed what he had just said, almost…

The fact he had admitted to have been at the bar the entire time hadn't escaped her, thinking he had probably watched her flirting with August, thinking that maybe he was just using her to settle some kind of a score with him.

He did hate him after all. Or was it her whom he hated?

Pushing away the thought, she began unbuttoning his shirt "So how about a tour first?" He suddenly asked, running his hands gently down her bare arms, his fingers lingering for a second to fiddle with her bracelet as he surveyed his surroundings.

"The only tour you're getting is of the bedroom" She said on a mischievous smile, giving a light tug on the collar of his shirt, beckoning him to follow her.

What tour was he talking about? It was just sex. Sex. That's all. Just. Sex.

…

Walking into the bedroom, she stepped out of her heels, his hands wrapping her from behind as he leaned to nuzzle her neck.

God it felt so good breathing her again.

Trailing soft kisses behind her ear and down her cheek, he reached one hand to her chin, gently turning her head to him as he slowly and hesitantly pressed a soft but short kiss to her lips. Their eyes locking the moment their lips broke apart and both of them froze, standing motionless as they studied with uncertainty each other's gaze.

Did she want him to kiss her again?

He had noticed that for some reason she had been avoiding his lips, so he wasn't sure whether he should kiss her again or not, and her piercing gaze revealed nothing. Still holding that thought and the moment was lost, as she already turned her head away, pulling her hair up, exposing the zipper at the back of her dress, waiting for him to slide it down.

He freed her from the dress, sliding the material off her shoulders and down her body, letting it fall to the floor, revealing her gorgeous body in a sexy black tulle and lace g-string and matching bustier bra.

Bloody hell. Did she wear it for…?

Thank God she took him home instead.

"God Swan you're gorgeous" He said, desire coursing through his body when she kicked the dress aside and he leaned to wrap her in his arms again, pressing her to him, his chest hair tickling her back as his hand slowly slid down her flat stomach and into her panties, making her gasp when he slipped one finger inside of her "Jesus you're so hot in there" He growled in her ear, slipping another finger, making her gasp again, his other arm pinioning her to his body, holding her tight so she wouldn't move when he pulled to thrust again, drawing her arousal along her folds and around her clit.

She moaned softly and writhed in his tight embrace as he thrust one finger inside of her again, then two, pulling out and thrusting again, pulling and slowly making his way up to her clit, circling lazily a few times before he did the whole damn thing again. And again. And again. The whole time his mouth alternating between devouring her exposed skin and whispering words of praise in her ear, telling her how beautiful, sexy and amazing she was as his fingers kept working her. His other hand reaching inside her bra, the mere graze of his thumb against her nipple sending her to oblivion, making her cry out her release, his relentless touch prolonging her orgasm as she came undone in his arms.

He kept holding her until she came down from her high, her hands on his as she panted, still trying to catch her breath. She then took his hands, moving them to her waist, her hands reaching back to his hips as she pressed her ass against his hardness, slightly bending over when she glanced at him over her shoulder and said in a sultry tone of voice "Take me"

He stared wide-eyed at her fine ass for a brief moment before he leaned in, his hands still on her waist as he whispered in her ear "if you want me to take you then you'd have to turn around cause you know I don't like taking…"

You. God help. Only you.

"…a beautiful woman from behind" He gently pulled her up and turned her around to face him "I wanna see this pretty face of yours when you come with me inside you" He whispered, his face only inches from hers, his hand reaching to brush her hair back over her shoulder, continuing the motion and caressing her shoulder blade as his eyes bored into hers.

How he loved getting lost in that wild green sea of her eyes.

…

Fuck. Too close. Too intimate. Too much.

She smiled a bit nervous "Then we need to get you out of these clothes" She said in a seductive low tone, trying to shake off her nervousness, her hands reaching to strip him from his opened shirt and pants as he stepped out of his shoes and socks, leaving him with nothing but a pair of boxers. She pulled him to her, one hand on his chest, the other burying at the hair at the nape of his neck when she rose on her tiptoes to trail open mouth kisses up his neck.

God she missed feeling that fit toned body of his. She missed digging her fingernails into his biceps, sucking on one of his broad shoulders, tracing his lean back muscles with her fingers, and gliding her hands all over his lightly hair covered perfect pecs.

"Your lips are so soft" He groaned, stopping himself a second later as his hands reached to hold her upper arms when he pulled back a little "Wait" He looked into her eyes "I don't have protection"

They stared at each other for a long moment, both thinking the same, both minds being sent more than four years back to that moment when she thought he had gotten her pregnant, to that moment when everything between them had began to crumble.

"I have some here" She averted her gaze towards her nightstand drawer, remembering she had some condoms in there "But I ah…" Her voice trailed off as she hesitated.

So fucking awkward.

"What?" He looked at her in bewilderment.

"It's just that they are regular size" She said embarrassed.

Oh God why did she have to go and say that?

…

Bloody hell. Why was she telling him that? He didn't want to think of other guys in her bed.

They looked at each other in silence for a short moment.

"Forget about it" She suddenly said, shaking her head "You probably won't be comfortable and I'm on the pill anyway"

"Give it to me" He said determined, gesturing with his hand for her to bring it.

No way in hell he was going to do that same mistake twice.

She opened the drawer taking one foil out and handing it to him "Now that we got that out of the way" He said when he threw the foil on the bed "Let me taste you" He gave her a devilish smile, quirking a suggestive brow as he picked her up bridal style and threw her onto the middle of the bed.

…

She was on her back, in the midst of her second orgasm, after his tongue worked its magic, and her walls hadn't even stopped cramping when she already heard the foil ripping, followed by the feeling of him at her entrance and his warm hands at the back of her knees as he slowly pushed himself into her warmth. She let out a groan, biting on her bottom lip as her eyes fluttered shut.

Fuck. She forgot how big he was.

Her body seemed to forget too as she felt a tad uncomfortable like she was being forcefully stretched, and he had yet to fill her completely.

"Having second thoughts?" He asked and her eyes flew open to meet his "You wanna stop?"

She just shook her head, feeling too nervous to talk.

Why was she feeling so damn nervous?

He thrust again and she let out another groan of complaint, her hands unconsciously gripping the sheets at her sides as her eyes closed once again.

"Are you sure about this?" He questioned as he stilled inside of her and she just nodded in reply. He slowly pushed himself into her again, gazing at her as she clenched her jaw and bit back any sound that made its way up her throat "What is it love?" He asked softly when he gently let go of her legs.

Love. He called her love.

She thought she'd never get to hear him say that again. Not to her anyway.

Her heart began racing, tears stinging at the back of her eyes as a knot began to form in her throat.

Oh fuck. She was not going to cry! She was reading way too much into it. They were just having sex. Just sex. Sex. She had to snap out of it. Snap out.

"Nothing" She swallowed hard, her voice just above a whisper.

"Then how come you're so tight?"

God. What could she possibly tell him? That she had spent the last month grieving she'd never get to touch him again? That now that she was able to it hurt even more? That it hurt being with him without really being with him? That she kept hearing his voice in her head saying just how much he hated her?

"I don't know, I guess it's been a while…" She replied quietly, her voice trailing off as she averted her gaze from him and a nervous small smile tugged at the corner of her mouth.

That was such a bad idea. She shouldn't have agreed to it. She should have just gone home alone.

"Come here" He said on a soft smile, his eyes tender and loving as he slid one hand under her back, wrapping her body, pressing it against his, the other hand gently caressing the hair at the top of her head when he leaned in to kiss her lips. She hesitated for a moment, looking at his closed eyes when he kissed her softly, her hands slowly and hesitantly letting go of the sheets and making their way up, only her fingertips daring to the touch the sides of his body so lightly as her eyes fluttered shut and she began kissing him back.

Damn it felt good. So good. Heaven. Sky. Stars. Good.

Lips parting and closing, heads tilting left and right, mouths diving and uniting, tongues clashing and tasting, the rum on his tongue mixing with the martini on hers as they kissed, again and again and again. Slowly, tenderly, lovingly as he started to move slowly inside of her, her body completely relaxing under his, her walls expanding for him, allowing him to move smoothly inside of her, her mind clearing from any nervous thoughts as all she could think of was how good and right it felt to have him inside of her again.

God she loved feeling him.

The soft slow kisses turned intense and heated, the lazy shallow thrusts turned deep and passionate, their bodies worked in sync, hips meeting thrust for thrust, hands roaming over skin, fingers digging into flesh, mouths sucking and kissing, teeth scraping and biting, tongues licking and teasing as they began climbing to the peak together.

How was it possible that after all those years they still fit so well together? The way their hands touched, the way their mouths kissed, the way their bodies moved, it was as if they were perfectly molded for each other.

She pushed him to his back, switching places with him, his chest hair under her fingers as she rode him, sinking down onto him again and again while his hands explored her naked curves "Jesus lass" He lifted his head to look at her, his face already wrecked as he threw his head back to the bed. Suddenly, and as if something had gotten into him he pushed his upper body off the bed, wrapping one arm around her waist and moving them, still joined, to the edge of the bed, his feet touching the floor when he pulled her by the hips, pressing her body close to his "Give me your mouth" He demanded, one hand at the small of her back, the other gently rubbing the back of her neck, her long golden hair enveloping them both as she leaned to press her lips to his. She began moving slowly on top of him, his hands moving to anchor at her hips, joining her body movements, hers wrapping his neck as she gradually picked up the pace. The more the kiss heated, the quicker she moved.

It was one of the many things she loved about him, he had always known how to make her feel loved, always wrapping her in his arms, keeping her body close to his when they had had sex.

Only that it didn't feel like sex back then, and it didn't feel like sex now. It felt like lo….Stop. She really needed to stop with that nonsense, of course it was just sex. Just sex. She shouldn't delude herself to thinking there was something more. It was just sex. Sex. Just. Sex.

He flipped them over again, throwing her gently on her back, pouncing on her and hooking one of her legs around his waist "Killian" She breathed heavily and her eyes flung open as she gazed into his mesmerizing blue eyes, watching them grow darker, watching them burning with want "The things you're doing to my body" She panted when his thumb met her clit, running her hands in his thick soft hair, pulling his mouth to hers, not giving him time to breathe, moaning into his mouth after each thrust, feeling the fire coursing through her body, feeling the tension in her core building higher and higher with each thrust, with each touch, with each kiss.

"You're so beautiful Emma" He whispered, his voice low and hoarse before his mouth plunged to devour hers once more, his thumb circling her clit relentlessly as he continued to take her with deep long strokes, hitting that spot inside of her, her mind beginning to spin, and her walls beginning to quiver as he soundly tore his mouth from hers "And you feel so damn good" He growled, his thick accented voice sending her over the edge as she crumbled around him, the tension inside of her releasing so violently that her back arched, her eyes rolled to the back of her head and all she could see was white as if she had just knocked on the doors of heaven.

"Killian I ah – " She said breathless.

God she wanted to tell him that she loved him. But what if he didn't feel the same? What if he still hated her? What if he was not capable of loving her again? What if she told him and he'd send her away like last time? Or worse, what if he pushed her out of his life for good? How was she going to survive that?

Instead she pulled his mouth to hers, thinking that if it were to be a one time thing at least she'd take full advantage of his intoxicating mouth.

…

She tried to slow her breathing, her hands reaching to his hips, encouraging him to thrust even harder as she spread her legs wider, pulled her knees up higher and took him as deep as she possibly could.

"Gods Emma" He growled loudly as he sank deep until the hilt of her warmth, his breath becoming erratic, one hand pressing hers into the mattress, intertwining their fingers together, the other sliding under her buttocks, pulling her to him as he drove into her again and again, chasing his own release, finding it a few thrusts later when he froze inside of her and called out her name under his heavy breath.

Emma. Gods Emma. She was real and she was with him again. He still couldn't believe it.

God he wanted to tell her that he still loved her. But what if sex was in fact all that she wanted from him? What if she still wouldn't love him back? Or worse, what if she ended up leaving him again? What if this time she disappeared from his life and never came back? How his heart would ever recover from that?

Their foreheads pressed together, sated grins spread across both of their faces as they looked at each other through hooded eyes, still trying to catch their uneven breaths.

Bodies joined, but hearts miles apart.

As all remained unsaid, unheard, unknown.

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.

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A/N: Just an enormous thank you! You guys are the best!