Chapter 13: Mungojerrie And Rumpleteazer
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Okay, here it is...it's coming...AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!
Macavity!
In case I haven't told you, Macavity is an evil cat. He is the worst criminal, apparantly he's committed EVERY CRIME in existence. But what is really bad is he's Munkustrap and Tugger's older brother. He used to be nice, but he fell in love with Demeter and then went cuckoo obsessed with her. When she rejected him, he raped her (poor Demeter) and then turned to crime. Demeter ended up giving birth to Plato, but I guess she must be ashamed of the fact he's Macavity's son as well cuase I never see them together (poor Plato).
But now he was here! I immediantly hid behind my dad. "Dad, what's going on?" I asked. Wow, stupid question, it's obvious what's happening!
"Pouncival, go hide with Admetus!" he cried, pushing me over to the junk piles. I looked back at him. "What about you?" I asked. "I'm going to find your mother. Stay here!" he said. I followed his orders, and immediantly attatched myself to my brothers leg. Admetus placed a paw on my head and tried to rub it comfortingly. However I realized something scary. "Where's Teazer?!" I asked, terrified.
Admetus looked down. "Probably with Jerrie," he said. But I realized something else. "I haven't seen 'em since Tugger's song!" I cried. Admetus paled. He knelt down and took me in his arms, hugging me. I was shaking. Could you blame me? I was scared for Teazer and Jerrie.
Eventually the clearing was emptied. There was nothing. After a few minutes I poked my head out, only to get it shoved back down by Metus. What was his problem? I was just cheking!
"HEE HEE HEE!"
What was that? "SSHH!" Hey, I know that giggle and sshh! That's trademark!
As if on cue, Teazer suddenly popped out from behind the TS-E1. She looked around and came out. Oh, wow, she had her sack with her! They must have been theiving. I wanted to go out and tell them that Macavity had been here, but then Jerrie came out with a sack, and to my shock:
They started DANCING. I heard some music playing, and then I saw them get off the car. Teazer giggled again, and then Jerrie shushed her. They kept dancing, and then bumped into eachother. Oh wow. They were right. They did get their song! Mungo started to sing at that point:
Mungojerrie
And Rumpleteazer, Rumpleteazer joined it. They then sang together:
We're a notorious couple of cats
As knockabout clowns
Quick change comedians
Tight rope walkers and acrobats
I wonder if I told you guys yet. Teazer and Jerrie are thieves. They are master thieves too! Mom and Dad don't approve at all! Ha ha, it's so fun, espiecally when they give me stuff! "What is she doing?!" I heard Admetus cry behind me. I looked over and saw Alonzo and Munkustrap talking angrily with eachother, in hushed voices. I frowned. What's wrong? They're just singing! Maybe Straps is mad he got pulled over one...
I decided to just smile and kept listening to their song.
We have an extensive reputation
We make our home in Victoria Grove
This is merely our center of operation
For we are incurably given to rove
Wow! Mungojerrie just lept completely over Rumpleteazer's head! Then they started singing about one of their heists.
When the family assembles for Sunday dinner
Their minds made up that they won't get thinner
It's not surprising they steal from their own humans. Must be why their constantly getting kicked out.
An Argentine joint
Potatoes and greens
Argentine joint....yummy.....What's Argentine?
Then the cook would appear from behind the scenes
And say in a voice that is broken with sorrow
I'm afraid you must wait and have dinner tommorow
The joint has gone from the oven like that
Ooo ooo now I remember! They brought a giant slab of meat home once, and it was so warm and so good! They shared it with the whole tribe because it was like as big as a pig - which must be what their family are if they ordered one that big!
Then the family would say
It's that horrible cat
Was it Mungojerrie
Or Rumpleteazer?
Wow, the humans must be stupid if they can't tell sis and Jerrie apart.
And most of the time,
They leave it at that!
Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer
Have a wonderful way of working together
Suddenly, I felt a finger on my shoulder. I looked back, and saw Tumblebrutus had come up to me. "Dude, you sister is cool!" he said.
I smiled. "Ain't she?" I said. Wow, I am so proud of her! How many cats have a thief for a sister?
You know, now that I think about it, with this town, there's probably a lot of them...
And some of the time you could say it was luck
And some of the time you could say it was weather
We go through the house like a hurricane
And no sober person
Could take his oath
Was it Mungojerrie
Or Rumpleteazer
Or could you have sworn that it might have been both
Suddenly a question popped into my head.
"You even talk to Jemima yet?" I asked.
Tumblebrutus blushed. "Have you danced with Bombalurina yet?" he asked.
"I tried, but she won't let me!" I said.
Tumblebrutus smirked. "Well, then you have no room to ta-OW!"
"Get back over here with me!"
Daddy Alonzo to the rescue!
And when you hear a dining room smash
Or up from the pantry, there comes a loud crash
Or down from the library
Came a loud PING
From a vase which was commonly said to be
Miiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiing-CLAT!
I wish Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer would take me out on a hiest once....
Then the family would say:
Now, which was which cat?
It was...Mungojerrie!
AAAND!...Rumpleteazer!
HOLY CRAP! They just did like a double cartwheel or something! Now everyone has to be impressed!
And there's nothing at all to be done about that!
Suddenly, all the other Jellicles surrounded them. Jerrie and Teazer lept off eachother, looking shocked. I got scared when I saw Dad and Mom come out with everyone else. I rushed out to try and stop them.
I could hear some of the adults scolding them.
"Wait, come on, they were just having fun!" I said. No one heard me. Suddenly, Jerrie and Teazer ran up onto the TS-E1. I saw Munkustrap and Alonzo each pick up one of their sacks. Suddenly, they tossed them high over Jerrie and Teazer's heads. Teazer tried to jump for it-MISS! EPIC FAIL! Suddenly, everyone sang out:
And there's nothing at all to be done about that!
Okay, I have to admit, the look on the notorious cats faces was priceless!
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Done!