I dare you to pretend to be in James and Lily's position. You will loose. Do not, under any circumstances laugh at Gran.
Chapter 22: Victoria
"Gran!" Lily exclaimed opening the front door.
"Hello." Her Gran said in her brisk voice a lot like McGonagall's.
"Come in." Lily said moving out of the way. Her grandmother was very old, but still sturdy and stubborn. The old woman walked past, you could almost hear her creak.
"Whose the boy?" she asked beginning to remove her jacket. Lily stepped behind her to help remove it.
"Gran, this is my boyfriend. James." Lily explained easing the coat of her shoulder. The woman looked over James.
"Hello." James said. Lily bit her lip.
"Age?"
"Um,"
"Come on boy, how old are you?"
"Seventeen." James answered.
"Family?" James struggled for a moment trying to figure out what the question meant, "What's your last name boy?"
"Oh, Potter."
"Potter?" Gran asked. She pursed her lips for a moment. Then silently she went to the living room. "Come." she snapped. Lily threw her jacket into the coat closet before following her into the other room. Petunia and Vernon were no longer there. The old woman sat down in the arm chair. "Sit." they sat. She looked at him for a long time. She had dark eyes that bored into people. Despite her age her back was as straight as a board, her hair thinning, but held high on her head in a bun.
She laid her purse in her lap, her lips locked tight as if relaxing them might cause her jaw to drop into her lap. And not in the I-am-shocked way.
"James Potter." she said eventually.
"Yes ma'am." James said. Her eyebrow raised.
"Seventeen years old." She continued.
"Yes."
"Yes ma'am." she corrected.
"Yes ma'am." he repeated
"Mother's name?"
"Laura."
"It's Laura ma'am. Or her name is Laura Mrs. Evans."
"Her name is Laura. Mrs. Evans." James said.
"Your father's name?"
"His name was Matthew, ma'am" Lily's grandmother nodded curtly.
"What's my name?" Lily bit her lip watching as James thought.
"Mrs Evans?" he asked.
"Victoria. After Queen Victoria. My mother always liked the name, strong name." She told him sternly. Then she smiled winking. "You're a good boy James. I like you."
"Thank you." James said a little confused. Victoria pointed her finger so he added, "Ma'am." She smiled again.
"You're a fast learner. That or Vernon was a dope." Lily muffled a laugh. "You said was."
"Was?" James asked. His voice was shaky, he sounded nervous.
"Your father's name was Matthew. So he's dead?"
"Yes ma'am."
"That's too bad. Are you over his death?" Victory asked. Her voice as snippy as ever. James didn't answer for a moment. Victory, for once did not rush him, but waited.
"You never get over someone close dying. Mrs. Evans." A small smile spread on her face.
"That's very wise." She praised. "Lily. Get me some tea. Want any James?"
"No thank you." James replied. Lily stood up to make tea.
"What kind to you want Gran?"
"Herbal. You're mother knows." Lily nodded going to the kitchen.
"Gran wants some tea." Lily informed her mother.
"What kind?" Her mother asked. She'd been scrubbing down the counter.
"Herbal." Lily answered.
"Okay." She pulled out some tea bags. "Here, you know how to make it right?" Lily nodded. "Good. I've got to go talk to her. Make me a cup too, if you don't mind."
So Lily was left alone in the kitchen to make some tea. She got out the tea cups, boiled the water, poured the water into the cups, added the bags, grabbed spoons then took them out to the living room.
She set the tray down on the coffee table before handing the cups out.
"Thank you Lily." Victoria said.
"Your welcome Gran."
"I was just asking James here, what he does for fun." Lily looked at James, handing off a cup to her mother.
"Really?"
"Yes. He claims to be a prankster." Gran continued.
"Um," Lily began, not exactly sure where she was going with that.
"I was asking him what kind of pranks he likes to play when you came in."
"Oh." Lily sat back down. Her Gran smiled slightly turning back to James.
"Anyway, mostly it's just Sirius and me goofing around." James explained.
"Sirius? What a peculiar name. Ironic how his name is serious, but he's immature and the opposite of what his name suggests isn't it?"
"Yes ma'am." James agreed.
"Where's Petunia?" Victoria asked suddenly.
"I'll go find her Victoria." Lily's mother offered. Victoria nodded once before turning back to James.
"You don't mind a story do you?"
"No ma'am."
"Good. Because I remember back in my day, while I was attending school," she paused to take a sip of her tea. Just like Lily's father had, right in the middle of something. "There was this boy. Oliver." Victoria closed her eyes as if that would help her remember him more clearly. "Handsome young man. He too played pranks. I recall one time in particular when he sat in a tree for three hours. Just waiting for one of his friends. When his friend finally came to sit under that tree to study, as that friend usually did, Oliver jumped from the tree scaring his friend." They all smiled at Victoria. "That friend of his was me. And we were married for sixty one years. He jumped out of that tree to ask me out. At first I said no of course. I too was seventeen. He was a year older than I was. Not much wiser, I might add."
"That's cute Gran." Lily said. Victoria blinked as if coming back to the present.
"Yes it was."
"How did you end up getting together?" James asked. She smiled sadly.
"I don't remember exactly. But I kept a journal. I read it sometimes. And all it says is that I got sick and Oliver would come over, refusing to leave me alone. We stayed in touch until he had to go to war. When he came back it was my turn to take care of him. I don't know what happened to him at war. Or if he ever took care of me outside of that illness. I simply can't remember." she sipped more of her tea.
"You should keep a journal Lily." Gran suggested.
"Yeah Lily." James agreed.
"I'm not one for keeping that kind of thing." Lily protested gently. Victoria drank her tea silently. Lily's mother came back with Petunia and Vernon behind her.
"Victor." Victoria said with an evil glint in her eye.
"It's Vernon." He corrected gruffly. Lily wasn't sure if the old woman was senile or just doing it to be cruel.
"That was rude. I demand you apologize." Victoria insisted sitting up straighter. Lily's mother left the room to get ready for the other guests.
"I was just..." Vernon began but Victoria hit him in the gut with her bag.
"Don't sass me." She snapped. Vernon grunted as the bag made contact.
"Sorry." She hit him again.
"It's sorry ma'am." James was biting his finger, fighting the laughter. Vernon ground his teeth together.
"Sorry ma'am." He repeated through his teeth.
"Hello Gran." Petunia said holding her arms outstretched.
"I don't hug." Victoria said winking at Lily and James. It looked like James was going to tear his finger apart if he refrained from laughing much longer. Petunia dropped her arms.
"How are you?" She asked instead.
"Are you saying I'm old?"
"I-I-I no." Petunia stammered.
"Well if you're making a comment about my health that must mean you think I'm ill, I don't look sick. I don't feel sick. So I presume you are saying that by being old there is a reason to worry about my health."
"N-n-no. I was just being polite." Petunia explained. Lily couldn't feel her lips she was pushing them together so hard.
"My health is fine. Thank you for your concern." Victoria said as if Petunia calling her old never happened. Ancient history it that old mind. But then Vernon went to sit on the couch.
"Did I say you could sit?" she shrieked causing Vernon to stand straight up. That did it. James was howling with laughter bringing Lily with him. Even Victoria, the batty old, rather cruel woman was laughing with them. The Dursley's looked lost. Were they supposed to laugh along? Were they the joke?
"Victoria?" Lily's mom asked reappearing. "What's so funny? Is everything alright?"
"It's fine." Victoria chuckled. "I was just having some fun."
"Could you excuse me a moment?" James asked hardly able to breath. Not that Lily was having much success at breathing either.
"Bathroom's on the right Dear!" Victoria yelled after him.
Did you do it? Did you laugh? What would Gran say? REVIEW!
This is probably my favorite chapter. I love Victoria. Tell me what you think.